30 Work Memes To Fill That Existential Void With Laughter (New Pics)

This should be at the top of the list!

Yes! A job is not your LIFE and anyone who expects it to be is a whackadoo

This looks like a sound business model to me! I wish you success.

what a fairy tale ending actually is:

Are we related?

I used to open our offices at seven in the morning, but would actually get there to begin at about twenty to seven. I had a new manager who rather aggressively questioned my time keeping (much to my annoyance) I told him in no uncertain terms that each morning I came in twenty to thirty minutes early as attested to by other staff. Also I had never missed an opening for over twelve years. And most importantly if he wasn't such a Pr@t he would realise that it could all be checked by the alarm system that had to be unset each morning. I walked away rather than give him the slap he so richly deserved.

The fact that HR did not set it up yet doesn't question where it came from is slightly more concerning

Why is this actually a common thing

shocker (hehehehe pun)

Don't forget KPI's, EBIDTA and all those meetings...

"Quick chat.....bring your coat"

Me at school this week: 100% interest……in going home.

Luckily I have a remote job, and people have only seen me in goblin mode. This way the standards were set low to begin with, and I cannot disappoint anyone.

Moral of the story: Stay in school as long as possible.

Hahahahaha. True story.

My question about putting that in any email is... What if the email finds you extremely unwell in fact in desperate need of medical attention. Is it going to help you?

Well it depends how it is documented. If it is a holiday but everyone gets paid for it then thank you. If it is -1 day from your monthly salary, then no thank you

Half-way done with this whole life thing. It's not that bad really. You will make friends at work, and commiserate about how crappy it all is. And 25 years will pass by at the blink of an eye. Then you'll wonder why you didn't notice you had gotten so much older, while still having the mind of a 22 year old.

When I die, I want to come back as a very much loved and indulged pet, preferably a cat or dog. Sleep 20 to 23 hours a day, and spend the rest of the time doing whatever I want, because 1) I was not born with the equipment to have any f***s to give, and 2) my hoomans always let me get way with murder because I’m so cute. Heaven.

There are so many things that beat in-person interaction, I literally can't list them here

Time stamped 9:01 am. Monday.

hell yes!!!!!!!

Me: i need monys

I have started responding with only, "Can you be more clear?"

I am a manager and believe PTO is meant to be used. I never ask why anyone needs time off. I have had folks call in because they "just can't" today and it's not an issue to me. I get it.

Most people’s contributions at meetings, especially when the bigwigs are there, are performative. That goes double for the brown nosers.

Work 3 days, off 4 days = work/life balance

I hope this is merely a joke, because the person who thought they were texting their boss probably needs that job.

I would like to upvote this more than once!!!

Not is it fixed by a week off, if you are lucky enough to get one.

Pandasizing World Peace

Pandasizing World Peace

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AMEN!

Genius

I generally try to be nice to other people but I'm always extra nice to service industry workers and say things like "oh, don't worry about it" and "it's not your fault" and "thanks so much!" The ones who work at my regular haunts are always very pleased to see me because they know I'm not going to make their day worse.

I won on the lottery. I spent all my winnings in two weeks. I bought drinks and drank it all. It was almost two gallons of whole milk.

"Isn't it rich? Aren't we a pair? ... Well, maybe next year."

her underwire is poking her ouch

It's even better when someone says "Are you ok? You look a bit pale." Then it's their fault for giving me the idea. :P

100% would hire!

The first time I got promoted, my dad told me "they will continue to promote you until you fail." Haven't failed yet, but the above is very true

There are many situations in which a phone call is preferable. I don't like talking on the phone. I don't like answering calls. But I do it when I need to, and more often than not, I was able to solve issues my colleagues have been pushing around their desks for months with a simple phone call. Even when I need to send written confirmation afterwards, like hiring a contractor, if I've talked to them first, me and my project are already on their mind. Emails can be overlooked, but I get a direct connection from a person's ear to their brain.

depends on the job. For me it's the most productive time of year, because everyone else is away (or at least checked out mentally, haha)

This was me for YEARS until i realized that waking up Sunday afternoon with a blurred out weekend was really no way to live. Truth for me.

That's a lie

So... what now?

😆😆😆

Time after time

This is a little too close to reality for me.

I'd say "No one has ever been able to prove I did it."

So we need to start a 2pm.

oh man i miss that show!

This must be at the start of the "compensating cycle", next comes less pizza, less often, until you get to the end of the cycle where there is nothing.

I don't get it

That's just the way it is and it will never change.

I put a stop to that by refusing to work on things if I missed their fake deadlines (sole person doing my specific job).

Get yourself an EV, set it to pre-condition. Contemplate with comfort.

They ask you for questions so that they can weed out the "troublemakers".

What is an email job and is it as awesome as it sounds?

You made the mistake of not being born into money, it seems.

Me on Monday morning