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Technically, insulting someone is incredibly rude. But when done skillfully enough, it can honestly be kind of impressive—even a real testament to brains and wit.
The trouble is, in the heat of the moment, it’s hard to come up with something truly worthwhile. That’s why one TikTok user asked people to share insults so intelligent, you don’t realize you’ve been roasted until three thoughts later.
Below, we’ve rounded up some of the cleverest responses. You might want to bookmark these for when your enemies least expect it.
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#2
I admire your courage to speak in the absence of knowledge
General Anaesthesia 1 month ago
I have an opinion, so my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.
#3
your approach to critical thinking is impressively minimalistic
#4
"I admire that you donât let facts interfere with your opinion"
#5
Thank you for helping me, it was like doing it myself only harder.
#8
âI donât have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.â
Vexed Panda 1 month ago
I was sat down by HR for an email that included, "The last three emails with instructions for this haven't worked for you, so let me try to Sesame Street you through it."
#9
It's impossible to underestimate you.
#12
I'm jealous of everyone that hasn't met you
LinkTheHylian 1 month ago
That's a lot of people to be jealous of. It's also a lot of effort. Better to ignore them and go to sleep.
#14
Your contribution to this conversation is like a cat bringing me a dead mouse. I can see that YOU'RE proud and I love that for you.
#15
Don't let my knowledge get in the way of your confidence
Yayheterogeneity 1 month ago
Nice one, too. For all professionals dealing with Facebook pros đ
#16
when someone says "do you know who I am." My favorite reply is "no, but I bet those who do are envious of me."
#17
You wouldnât be able to pour water out of a bucket if the instructions were on the bottom
Scott Rackley 1 month ago
I've heard this one as "couldn't pour p**s out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel"
#19
You've mastered the tone of authority without the inconvenience of depth.
#20
As an outsider, what are your views on intelligence?
Am I Funny? Maybe or maybe not 1 month ago
I have no clue what intelligence means and have no intention of learning.
#23
I respect your tenacity in protecting your opinion from the facts
#24
âThe reason you get so lost in thought is that itâs unfamiliar territoryâ
#25
âSomewhere out there is a tree, working tirelessly to provide you oxygen to breath and speak⌠i believe you owe it an apology on wasting itâs efforts.â
#26
I wish i didn't have common sense, you seem so happy
#27
âThe majority of people would certainly agree with youâ is the maddest anyone has ever gotten at me.
#28
"Some people bring Joy wherever they go. Others, whenever."
#29
You are our competitors greatest asset
#30
My favorite one from that thread was "You fill a much needed void."
#31
Listening to you speak makes me envy the deaf
#32
Donât be embarrassed about who you are. Leave that to your parents
#33
I wonât argue, you seem very committed to this version of reality.
#34
âIt was wonderful to meet you, youâve made me reconsider my standardsâ
#35
i admire your consistency most people stop when they realise they're wrong
Vix Spiderthrust 1 month ago
Who was it who said "Consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds"?
#38
You may need to take a break from sharing opinions today.
#40
Your Holidays are our Holidays đŤś
Ronnie Row 1 month ago
Very sneaky. How many of you out there had to think about that one for a bit? (Cmon, you know you did).
#41
you haven't been yourself lately - we've all noticed the improvement!
#43
"You're truly unforgettable to everyone around you. Trust me, we've tried!" "You sure are proud of those 8 pretty crayons in your 64 pack, huh?" "That's very brave of you to have that opinion in this day and age."
#44
âyour parents change the subject when people ask about you, eh?â
#46
Your food for thought leaves everyone still hungry
#48
You are a living proof that God has a sense of Humorđ¤Ł
#49
Your mind is such a peaceful place, no thoughts to bother you.
#52
You have a unique way of contributing without adding much.
#53
A mind so serene even thoughts refused to intrudeđ
#54
âI appreciate you sharing that. Itâs always interesting to see how confidently someone can misunderstand something.â
#55
âThank you, you always cease to amaze me.â
#56
great! you and my bungalow have something in common nothing upstairs đ
#57
I hope you appreciate the fact breathing is involuntary.
#58
"you have strayed far from the shores of sanity" Niklaus Michaelson
#60
it amazes me how talented you are at crafting conversation into capital punishment
#63
if thinking was a crime you wouldn't be guilty đ
#64
Your confidence far exceeds your demonstrated performance
#67
âYou speak with the confidence of someone whoâs never been questioned.â
#69
"I like how you can live a life free from the burden of excess knowledge!" "I love how you operate on vibes instead of facts, very retro!"
#72
The only reason i understand you sometimes is because I studied Animal Science
#75
You took the scenic route to the same point, except now we are all tired
Jeremy James 1 month ago
"He would start at Point A, yes! And then he might take a drive down to the lake and feed the ducks... eventually winding up at the infinitely unpopular Point C, simply because the baguettes were fresher and less expensive." --KITH
#76
I admire your ability to make decisions without any regards to decorum.
David Paterson 1 month ago
I, on the other hand, admire your ability to make decisions without any regards to mathematics.
#77
âPlease try not to live up to my current expectationsâ
#79
my favourite Irish one is you don't sweat much for a big Girl
#80
You had to be physically strong to survive in this world
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Vix Spiderthrust 1 month ago
A friend of mine used to say whenever a car overtook him, "I don't know what you're rushing for, you'll be no f*****g use when you get there"
Vix Spiderthrust 1 month ago
A friend of mine used to say whenever a car overtook him, "I don't know what you're rushing for, you'll be no f*****g use when you get there"
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