Grandparents sometimes ‘compete’ for the love and attention of their grandkids from the very first years of their lives, no matter how funny and strange it may actually seem. They compete over who will give the most luxurious birthday gift, who will treat the kids to the most delicious food, who they will spend time with more willingly…
The story we are going to tell you today, from the user GrandparentsPocketMoney, as you probably already understood from the author’s username, is connected with the fact that the 10YO kid’s grandparents give her pocket money – and another couple of grandparents are overly jealous about it. So now let’s just read on.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post has a 10-year-old daughter who spends 40% of her time at her bio dad’s house
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The man lives with his parents who often give the girl pocket money – as well as their other grandkids
Image credits: GrandparentsPocketMoney
Image credits: Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The author’s own parents are mad over this and demand the ex-in-laws stop giving her money at all
Image credits: GrandparentsPocketMoney
Image credits: Marcus Aurelius / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Moreover, they want the author to pose this demand to her ex-parents-in-law herself
Image credits: GrandparentsPocketMoney
The woman considers this really weird and childish, so she decided to ask netizens for support and advice
So, the Original Poster (OP) has a 10-year-old daughter, who spends about 40% of her time at the house of her biological father, the author’s ex. His parents often give her pocket money – just like they do with their other grandkids. As a result, the girl got the opportunity to either buy some goodies or save up for more serious purchases.
Well, it seems like everyone should be happy about this – but our heroine’s parents are purely outraged by the fact that the ex-in-laws give pocket money to their granddaughter, fearing that she will now ‘love them more’; that she will choose them. Moreover, for some time now, the author’s parents have been pestering her to talk to her ex-PILs in order to stop this.
Our heroine really believes that her parents are being unreasonable, and that if they really wanted to raise this issue – let them ask about it themselves. The parents said no. She also offered them a cut of her own pocket money so they could give it instead – and again, the idea didn’t find any support from them. According to the OP’s parents, these words should come from her lips – and only from hers.
As a result, our heroine, tired of constant demands and requests from her parents, simply decided to take it online, seeking support and probably some advice from the netizens. Simply because she personally doesn’t think that pocket money for a 10-year-old girl from her grandparents is something shameful or bad.
Image credits: benzoix / Freepik (not the actual photo)
“I can say right away that in this situation, the parents of this woman are not only acting enviously, but also partly cruelly, trying to pass off their envy as their daughter’s idea,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, with whom Bored Panda got in touch for a comment about this case. “Thereby evading responsibility and shifting it onto the shoulders of their daughter. This, alas, happens quite often.”
“Instead of trying to do something good on an equal footing with others, these people are trying, on the contrary, to ‘equalize the situation’ by forcing others to stop doing this good. And it seems simply ridiculous and childish. Especially since children’s love for parents and grandparents actually correlates very little with pocket money.”
“In any case, this mom is doing the right thing by refusing her parents’ provocative idea – which not only will lead to nothing, but could also ruin her relationship with the ex-parents-in-law. Because actually, any conflicts around children also complicate their childhood,” Irina sums up.
People in the comments also backed the OP, claiming that, firstly, it’s none of her parents’ business what the other grandparents give to the kid, and secondly, they’re just being weird and jealous here. “Shut it right down,” someone wrote reasonably. So now it’s probably your turn, our dear readers, to express your thoughts about this situation in the comments below.
Most people in the comments simply sided with the woman, claiming that it’s none of her parents’ business at all
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If they want to cement their relationship with their granddaughter, it doesn't have to be through money. Just pay attention to/do things with her!
So to summarise, Grandparents want Grandchild to financially suffer because they a) have set their own cap on how money she should get and b) are jealous of the other Grandparents doing it? NTA
Bonus twist, they want their daughter to break the news and the deal between other grandparents and the children for them.
Load More Replies...It’s not like they’re handing her a hundred bucks a week to spend on whatever c**p she wants on a whim. It’s just 5 pounds a week, and not cash either, so it’s not burning a hole in her pocket. They’re being pretty modest with her allowance, so it shouldn’t get blown out of proportion. Do OP’s parents do stuff with their grandchild that the ex’s parents don’t? You know, stuff that doesn’t have a price tag? That isn’t just handing the kid some money and thinking you’ve done your grandparent duty? The stuff that doesn’t have a price tag on it is actually the more valuable, so maybe if OP’s parents do that and the ex’s parents don’t, OP can tell them they give the more valuable gift to their grandchild. I don’t know. I’m just spitballing here.
You know what I remember about my grandparents. Not the toys but going to the beach, making apple pie and lemon meringue pie every Easter and sitting on my grandpas lap reading to him. Those kids won't remember what they bought with their allowance but they will remember going to the park or vacations that's so much more important than money.
Load More Replies...If they want to cement their relationship with their granddaughter, it doesn't have to be through money. Just pay attention to/do things with her!
So to summarise, Grandparents want Grandchild to financially suffer because they a) have set their own cap on how money she should get and b) are jealous of the other Grandparents doing it? NTA
Bonus twist, they want their daughter to break the news and the deal between other grandparents and the children for them.
Load More Replies...It’s not like they’re handing her a hundred bucks a week to spend on whatever c**p she wants on a whim. It’s just 5 pounds a week, and not cash either, so it’s not burning a hole in her pocket. They’re being pretty modest with her allowance, so it shouldn’t get blown out of proportion. Do OP’s parents do stuff with their grandchild that the ex’s parents don’t? You know, stuff that doesn’t have a price tag? That isn’t just handing the kid some money and thinking you’ve done your grandparent duty? The stuff that doesn’t have a price tag on it is actually the more valuable, so maybe if OP’s parents do that and the ex’s parents don’t, OP can tell them they give the more valuable gift to their grandchild. I don’t know. I’m just spitballing here.
You know what I remember about my grandparents. Not the toys but going to the beach, making apple pie and lemon meringue pie every Easter and sitting on my grandpas lap reading to him. Those kids won't remember what they bought with their allowance but they will remember going to the park or vacations that's so much more important than money.
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