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There's probably not one person in the world who hasn't felt dumb at one point or another in their lives. It's only human to experience mild brain farts from time to time, no matter your IQ, academic achievements, or profession. We're all highly susceptible to blunders, and that's okay!
However, there's no denying that dumb things are funny. There's a reason why Reddit always seems to love threads about the dumbest thing someone has said or done. Dumbest injuries? Viral. Dumbest things kids have said? Viral. So when someone on the r/AskReddit subreddit asked "What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard?" of course there were over 15k people that upvoted the thread and thousands of others participating in it. However, Bored Panda has handpicked you 50 stories that we enjoyed reading the most. Scroll down below to read them all and share in the comment section the dumbest thing you have heard!
More info: Reddit
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#1
"If i could find a country that didn't take immigrants in I'd move there..."
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
That's the Groucho Club criterium... "I don't want to move to any country with standards so low that they'd take me".
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
Scary part... people like this represent a sizable % of our electorate in the US. We need to pass a new constitutional amendment to a piece of our legislation: "people too stupid to vote shouldn't be allowed to vote".
Piri Wendriner 5 years ago
North-Korea. The safest country in the world, no one wants to move in, zero immigrants.
Darlene Michuk 5 years ago
Have said two or three x in my life of 61 yrs "I am afraid I have to ask for a refund." They have always complied. Not over using this, still trying to be polite. Saw CBC Marketplace on asking for a refund, today.
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Vanta Black 5 years ago
"Sir, we don't allow immigrants." "What the hell? I'm not an immigrant! I'm white! And a Christian!" "You're also an idiot. Jog on."
RELATED:
#2
I drive for Uber on the weekends and one time a girl who was in her late 20’s told me that I was making her uncomfortable. I haven’t said a word the whole trip so I asked how I could make the situation better. She said she didn’t like how i kept “playing with the fidget stick in the middle of my car.” I drive a manual. She then told me that I didn’t need to use that because “her car didn’t have that” and claimed to be a mechanic
ƒιѕн 5 years ago
Scariest time of my life was teaching my daughter to drive stick, finally just turned it over to my son to do the teaching.
Christel Nellemann 4 years ago
You know, your “stupid” daughter has half your genes. :-D
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Norah Reilly 5 years ago
Albert Einstein once said, "Two things are infinite; one is stupidity, the other is the universe, and I have my doubts about the universe."
#3
I was in a college class, and we were talking about agriculture. Me being from a farming town I was explaining how important certain aspects of farming are interesting, and super important. This one student was not budging, and she was refusing whatever I was saying. I asked her why she was so against farming, and she said "I think we should get rid of all of them. We don't need them." I asked her if she liked to eat, and she said we would be fine. We could just get food from the stores. I asked her how she planned on getting that food into the store. She responded with "Well they already make all the food in the store as it is right? Why do we need farms. They're stealing money from our local businesses." So in a nutshell. She thought everything, flowers, fish, chicken, loaf bread, and like everything. Was made in the stores, and that's why we don't need farms.
Zoe's Mom 5 years ago
City girl here; born and raised in San Francisco. I went hiking in Yosemite and a baby bear came walking through a crowd of people wanting to get to the falls for water. I looked at the friends I was with and said, "Let's get out of here; if Mama Bear comes, this is going to be bears McDonalds". A guy in front turned and looked at me and said "You means that's not a full grown bear"! We just left.
Iapetos 5 years ago
Very humble, referring to yourself and your companions as junk food :-)
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Kesam 5 years ago
I hate it when people don't realize where food comes from. I mean, do they ever stop to think about much work it is to grow spaghetti trees or hunt marshmallows?
SoozeeQ 5 years ago
Reminds me of that whole spaghetti tree hoax! https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/04/that-time-the-bbc-fooled-its-audience-into-thinking-spaghetti-grew-on-trees/
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Sofia Monteiro 5 years ago
Being from the city, and really from anywhere else, is no excuse for lack of general culture and basic common sense
Brenda Johnson 5 years ago
Oh my goodness, and she actually got into a collage? Please tell me she can't vote. Good grief.
Nuno Tavares 5 years ago
In college, all class debating about euthanasia for like 15 minutes, a girl asked: Teacher does euthanasia have cure?
Chich 5 years ago
I grew up on a farm but when I started school it was with mostly city kids. I remember a discussion much like the one above. Guess some people just hold on to their beliefs.
Googleman1234 5 years ago
i know someone like this except he thinks like this in alot of other ways too (he thinks the way mines work are that you push a minecart into it and it comes out with gold bricks or whatever, he also believes that houses are naturally appearing landmasses and that people who are building them are just terraforming, he thinks that cats and dogs just randomly show up in peoples houses and they bring them in, and a ton of other crazy stuff) i never correct him. I just let him explain "basic" things that im "too dumb" to know. P.S. we are both in between College and middle school (not giving out my exact age)
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#4
A girls in math class didnt understand fractions. We got down to this because the teacher was explaining smething else pretty simple that she didnt understand. So broke it down and figured out she didnt get fractions. Well, thats a little odd but with a minute of explanation she should get it. Nope. Teacher asked "what is larger, 1/2 or 1/3?" The girl said 3 is more than 2 so 1/3 is larger. Teacher drew two circles on the board, divided one in two and the other in three parts. "Which is bigger?" Girl gave the same answer. Teacher erazed both circles, grabbed two pieces of paper, ripped one in half, one in thirds. Held up a piece of both "Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the 1/3 piece. "Forget that there are more piece" and he binned the rest, holding up the initial two pieces again. "Just look at the size. Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the smaller one again. Defeated, teacher lowered his arms and walked back to his desk. "Please take no offense in this... but are you familiar with the words and concepts of "smaller and larger"?" He asked, as this class turned more sesamestreety by the second. The girl said she did. Teacher pointed outside. "See those trees? Which is larger, right or left?" "Left", girl said and she was right. The left tree was about 5 metres taller. "Then which piece of paper is larger?" Holding them up again. Girl pointed out the smaller piece and the teacher walked out of the classroom.
Kesam 5 years ago
Teacher returns with bar of chocolate. "Now, I'm going to share this bar with you. Do you want 1/2 or 1/2000 of it?"
Martha Riche 5 years ago
This girl probably has her pizza cut into 6 pieces instead of 8 because 8 would be too many for her to eat.
S 5 years ago
Right? I have more questions lol Might even want to speak to her parents lmao
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nanashi 5 years ago
this is why I can't ever be a teacher. I don't know how well I can control my desire to strangle someone when they still can't understand a concept even after breaking it up to the basics.
izraul hidashi 5 years ago
Teacher: Which grade is higher, an "A" or an "F". Girl: An "F" obviously. A B C D E "F"
Holly Allen 5 years ago
This sounds like the girl really did know and was messing with him....it worked
Meyer Weinstock 5 years ago
Here in CA, this incident would require a Special Education Assessment. If it came out that the kid was bluffing, then a suspension order might arise, and the assessment bill would be sent to the parents. Last laugh?
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Hazel Waring 5 years ago
As a teacher - when she answered the tree question, did she know her left from her right?
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
Put the smaller atop the larger and it sticks out, showing it's larger?
Charlotte Prewitt 5 years ago
Sounds like she has a learning disorder, possibly math based like dyscalculia.
Marysue Watches 5 years ago
Thank you for saying this! Not everyone that doesn't understand things is an idiot, this poor girl's self esteem must have been crushed that day and the professor should have addressed the problem better.
Load More Replies... #5
Reminds me of someone who wrote a negative review of their Spain trip, saying everyone were foreigners and they didn’t speak English
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
About 20 years ago I was in Shibuya and overheard an American lady asking a Japanese man at a busy intersection for directions. He didn't understand English, and kind of looked at her like she was crazy. So she asked him a second time, in English, this time slower and LOUDER
#6
Me: “What weighs more; a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?” Coworker: “Bricks!” It took me about 15 minutes to explain the answer to him, which included me drawing it out on paper and using a kitchen scale with different items for examples. I drank so much that night.
shado 5 years ago
explains why there is a big orange toddler in charge of America
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Truth Monster 5 years ago
Surprisingly, the answer is different for pound of gold, vs a pound of bricks. Look it up :)
Podunkus 5 years ago
Correct. Precious metals like gold are measured inTroy ounces, 12 per pound. Other stuff is measured using the Avoirdupois system, 16 ounces to the pound. So a pound of feathers weighs more than a pound of gold. Good trick question.
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Fred Bayer 5 years ago
Actual he is right, because "a pound" refers to mass, but you asked for weight, which is different when measured with a scale, since the object weighed has some buoyancy in air. So the more dense object (the brick) actually weighs more than the less dense one with the same mass.
Jane Alexander 5 years ago
The orignal question was; "What weighs more, a pound of gold or a pound of feathers?" Answer; The feathers weigh more as they are weighed in avoirdupois where the gold is weighed in Troy weight.
#7
When I was getting a new aquarium, I put my fish into plastic bags of water to hold them while I set up the new tank. My Mother panicked and started punching holes in the bags with a pencil. When I asked her what in the good god she was doing, she came back with: "I'm putting air holes in the bag so your fish don't suffocate. Come on helljack, use your head!" Nothing I said could convince her she wasn't the hero of this tale.
ƒιѕн 5 years ago
Like the episode of Family Guy when Peter got Chris a bullfrog and poked holes in its back so it could breathe while it was in the box.
glowworm2 5 years ago
Apparently, there's another episode where a giant bullfrog tries to dispose of a tiny Peter the same way he did in that episode.
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Emily Duffin 5 years ago
your mother raised you right? shouldn't she be the one telling you that?
Stephanie Did It 5 years ago
Aquariums should be set up about 10 days before adding any fish. This allows the chlorine in tap water to dissipate, or the dechlorinating solution to work. Gravel residue needs to settle. Then the water needs to circulate and establish a ph balance and natural flora/bacteria. Tossing new fish into a freshly set up aquarium is pretty much a death sentence.
Danieletc 5 years ago (edited)
Thing is, she isn't wrong. Fish breathe the oxygen IN the water. The oxygen gets diffused in the water. Fish are not plants, they don't exhale oxygen. Leave a fish in a sealed non-porous container, it will continue to exhale carbon dioxide, and deplete the oxygen in the water. The fish will eventually suffocate. I don't know how long it takes, but you are not the hero of this tale. You're the dumb one.
Jordyn Owensby 5 years ago
Are we sure the mother is capable of having a child? Next thing we know the mom's gonna be putting her kid in a bag of water so she doesn't dry out from being in the air!
#8
Had a friend over years ago and we were talking about my plasma TV. He said that he would never buy a plasma tv because he didn't want to have to replace the plasma when it ran out. I didn't correct him. I thought it would be best if he didn't buy a plasma tv.
Roxy Eastland 5 years ago
My husband and I shared stories of when we found out there was another meaning for plasma. For me it was sitting and thinking "obviously there's not the straw coloured fluid that is the basis of blood in a plasma TV, so what does it mean?" and for him it was being alarmed to discover that people apparently have a substance hotter than gas in their veins . . .
Ray Heap 5 years ago
Some oodles of yonks ago I worked as a support tech weenie for a electronic shop, which also sold plasma tv´s. One day a woman rang and asked what kind of plasma was in her tv, artificial, human or animal as she was a vegan and did not wish for any kind of animal plasma in her house. I gave her the best technical explanation in the most sarcastic voice I could manage without being fired and left her more confused than ever.
Andrew Bridge 5 years ago
Iirc re gassing some type of TV is possible, although probably rare and pretty pointless these days
fuggnuggins 5 years ago
No. You don't replace the plasma. You throw the whole thing out, creating more unnecessary land-fill, and fork out another exorbitant cost for another new one. Yeah, he's dumb, you aren't... Good on ya'.
#9
Elderly lady my mom knew refused to ever drink Colombian coffee because she was convinced that they "secretly put cocaine in it". If that was the case, every store would be sold out of it as soon as they got it in. Idiot.
DramaDoc 5 years ago
I have *not* been buying the right coffee then! No wonder mine seems so defective on occasion...
Leonel Franco 5 years ago
I am colombian. I haven't seen a pound (or less) of cocaine in my entire life.
fuggnuggins 5 years ago
She might have just confused it with old Coke and Columbian cartel trade. That's not stupid. That's just not caring enough to maintain the memory.
Chris DiFonso 5 years ago
Well, THAT explains why some teens have resorted to snorting coffee grounds! And, no, I am not making that up, as much as I wish I were.
BusLady 5 years ago
I believe you. I think teenagers would snort anything.
Load More Replies... #10
Someone was convinced that Queen stole the bass line to "Under Pressure" from Vanilla Ice's "Ice Ice Baby". He wasn't even saying it as a joke.
GirlFriday 5 years ago
Well, I once had someone tell me how "Islands in the Stream" was the country knock off of "Ghetto Superstar". I said, "Let me explain to you how time works."
KombatBunni 5 years ago
Or the time some idiot emo kid in a club said that someone had covered Marilyn Manson’s Sweet Dreams when the DJ played the original by Eurythmics and my friends had to hold me down before I jumped on the kid to beat them for their stupidity..
izraul hidashi 5 years ago
Yes! Vanilla Ice made that baseline as a baby, and Freddie Mercury said, I'm stealing that baby's baseline!
Sherbaan Naab 5 years ago
That's not that bad. Depending on which song he heard first and not knowing much about the band and artist, he could make that mistake. Now, if he is made aware of the facts and still refuses to change his mind, then he can be called a dumbass.
SykesDaMan 5 years ago
Agreed! That's more a sign of lack of knowledge, than one of stupidity.
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#11
Someone giving their one month old infant a bottle full of juice and water because her mother said to. Also denying the professional nutritionist that told her that’s bad for a baby. Another baby, under one year old, who’s mom puts soda in a bottle because the baby likes it. I don’t think people realize how actually life threatening it is to give their own children these things. And the fact that they don’t put an ounce of research into what they give their kids, or listen to the professionals telling them what their doing is wrong, just makes me so angry.
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
They've done the research, read all the FaceBook wisdom about vaccines etc. Real world facts, not book knowlegde!
Jro308 5 years ago
Well duh of course they have! If it's on the internet it must be true!
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Willem Groenewald 5 years ago
In the 80s a family we knew had a child with brain damage. Turned out it was caused by his parents feeding him Cremora. It still makes me angry, what a waste of his life.
nanashi 5 years ago
from my experience of observing parents with young children, they would always do let the kids do/eat damaging things for the sake of having them NOT to throw a tantrum. if I were to comment on why they probably shouldn't do that, they would either ignore me to the fact that I have no kids of my own, or I wouldn't know the emotional/mental stress a parent would go through IF they deny the kids of the bad but fun/delicious things and throw a tantrum.
Brooke Weber 5 years ago
Stories like these make me think more and more about requiring a mandatory parenting class...
Panda Kicki 5 years ago
Infants die every year from being fed water or juice instead of breast milk /formula. The are very sensitive for the balance in the fluids and are not to be fed anything else the first months.
Stephanie Did It 5 years ago
Then they wonder why the child has horrible, painful gas and later, rotten teeth before age 2.
Rainbow Panda 5 years ago
So people rather damage, hurt or potentially kill their child than go through a tantrum. 😳
#12
I used to work in a grocery store and this elderly woman said, “Twenty-five cents a pound? I can get them 4 pounds for a dollar at Safeway
Mary Peace 5 years ago
Advertising people take a lot of time deciding how to phrase these things, so that customers think they're getting a bargain. To some people, 4 pounds for a dollar sounds like 'better value'.
Lousha 5 years ago
I was once standing next to a lady at a greengrocers back in Hungary who was looking at radishes. Then asked "Hmmm... so each is 30 Forints? Bit steep... May I take 3 for 100?" The guy was looking at her for a few seconds in amazement, then just said "Sure...". A happy customer is always a good customer.
David Lippman 5 years ago
Tell her she can have a huge gigantic shiny nickel for that small ugly dime she's carrying.
#13
If you have sex with a pregnant girl you can change the biological dad to you. We went to a prestigious school and he wasnt dumb. Everyone looked at him like an idiot
Brenda Johnson 5 years ago
Well he was an idiot. Wait until he finds out twins can have different fathers. Ha will really blow his mind.
Beezel Palomar 5 years ago
Dude was told last week it was true and he was gonna be a proud father.
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
To his superior insight however, everybody else looked like an idiot.
#14
My co worker honestly thinks if we keep throwing our garbage into the ocean that nature will "take care of it" with no negative consequences.
Lynn Morello 5 years ago
They need a boat trip to that Plastic Island in the middle of the ocean.
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François Carré 5 years ago
That's fine, just throw yourself into the ocean, "nature" will take care of you too.
Piri Wendriner 5 years ago
Anyway, he is right. Nature will take care of it, and kill the human race to stop it. Few million years and that rubbish will vanish like never happened. Long term there are no negative consequences.
Mshauri Mazuri 5 years ago
We need to throw your coworker into the ocean and let nature take care of it 😅
Jamie Andersen 5 years ago
Well that's how it works if a I have learned anything from trailer park boys
#15
Freshman English class... we were reading Lord of the Flies at the same time the movie Alive (about a soccer team's plane crashing in the Andes mountains) came out. Since both were about groups being stranded and the politics/society building that results, we were discussing the movie in class one day. When discussing their resorting to cannibalism as they remained stranded on the mountain, this one girl asked, "Why didn't they just order Domino's or something and have it delivered?"
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
Terrible mobile reception, probably! Uber didn't deliver outside of main cities then! Etc!
Curry on... 5 years ago
Domino stopped delivering to mountainous regions, because the sea gulls would fight over the anchovies.
#16
When I did tattoos, I had a guy come into the shop that wanted "Mr. 113" on his wrist. Not really all that out of the ordinary. We get it drawn up, my co worker placed it and she starts to do the tattoo. As soon as she starts, the guy screams in pain and jumps up. "What the hell is in that thing?! Is there a needle in there?! That [crap] hurts!" .... what?! This guy was in his 30s or 40s. How do you not know how tattoos are done?! He said, "I don't know. Just thought it was some permanent ink or something." The guy went outside for almost an hour to smoke and I guess hype himself up. He got the outline done at least, but couldn't take the pain anymore and didn't get it filled. Still can't believe he didn't know tattoos were done with a needle.
Zoe's Mom 5 years ago
I have 4 tattoos. Mine are relatively small in comparison to what folks are doing today. The largest on being on my right arm of a fairy that is about 5 inches long and maybe 6 inches wide due to the wings. My latest is an outline of my precious dog Zoe. I had it done in gradient ink starting with pink to a dark purple because everyone think she's a male because she's black. Holy moly...did it hurt on my wrist more than anywhere else so I get it but I stuck it out.
Doris Bennett 5 years ago
Try getting your eye brows & eyeliner tattooed! I thought that nothing could hurt worse ... then I had my lips done in a soft coral ... I looked like a cartoon DUCK until it healed! Pain??? OMG! But I looked awesome!
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Heather March 5 years ago
My dad has full body tattoos. In the summer he would wear shorts while delivering mail and would have people ask if his tattoos were real. He would deadpan say no, they're iron on.
Celtic Pirate Queen 5 years ago
Pussy. I have a Celtic band that wraps around my entire upper right bicep. Did it hurt? Hell, yes (especially on the inner arm), actually brought tears to my eyes. But then, I understand how tattoos are applied.
Carmen Honacker 5 years ago
Whoa, that's special. Even if you don't have any tattoos yet, don't you have friends who do? Because the first question I always get is "did it hurt?"
Lynn Morello 5 years ago
I have always loved Tattoos, It took me 40 years to pluck the courage up to have a Tattoo done. it measures 10" X 10", an Owl and a Dream-Catcher Pentagram. The Tattoo parlour Owner, commented, when he saw me, "Who do I have to thank for this one? (Nasty) I sat through and got the Tattoo done without an issue. Should have had it done years ago.
Sandra Llewelyn 5 years ago
I have one tattoo and never ever again - more painful than childbirth but not as bad as gout
#17
Can't you just hold in your period or stop it?
Foxxy (The Original) 5 years ago
I sooooo wish we could without it involving a pregnancy or surgery.
⚞ Katniss Everdeen ⚟ 5 years ago
You can block the app "Period" for like nine months if you download Pregnancy.io, but then you get this annoying pop-up ad that doesn't go away for 18 years.
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Marnie 5 years ago
I don't expect guys to know all the details, but this particular confusion is incredibly insulting. Does the person think SO badly of women that they think we're just too lazy and gross to hold it in? What sort of a mind even entertains that thought? Someone who sees women as less than human, or really stupid and just have to have basic things explained to us.
LANDON WHITTINGTON 5 years ago
ok as a guy i known what a girls period was since i was 6 wtf the dude
C Pryce 5 years ago
That's nothing. I once dated a guy in his 30's who thought pee and period cane out of the same hole.... 😰
Gage Franke 5 years ago
I feel bad now because that's what I thought until my junior year health class :(
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Dragonfruit'nrollerskates 5 years ago
In school yesterday. I was in the bathroom for 30 seconds and he yells at me to get out. I was very tempted to tell him what was goin on in there
#18
I had a patient tell me once that smoking can’t cause cancer and it’s all a big hoax... as I took him to his chemo appointment for lung cancer, which was most likely because he smoked 40 a day. (How can anyone afford to do that?)
TheHolyFatherOfToast 5 years ago
At least we have those rich and super smart people
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Todd Hunter 5 years ago
My friend's brother was convinced that smoking wasn't addictive, he took up smoking to prove it to his friends. 25 years later he 's hooked and smokes a pack a day.
Belle_Pandamonium🇧🇻l 5 years ago
Yeah, but he can quit if he wants to. Any day now..
Load More Replies... Zoe Stillwell-Taylor 5 years ago
oh yeah, just like covids a hoax, and passing bacteria from one person to another is DEFINITELY a hoax, and dying is just an illusion.
#19
My old housemate thought that Down Syndrome was something you could get from vaccines. She wasn’t anti-vax. She was talking about vaccines and said “I don’t get why parents are afraid to get their kids vaccinated. The chances of catching Down syndrome are really low.”
Clever Dog 5 years ago
wow this is so wrong on so many levels and a big part of why disability discrimination is so severe and also not talked about. Race, sexuality and gander are all issues people are ignorant about but at least in 2020 the discussion has started. In the case of disability it has not. I think the OP is getting Down(s) syndrome and Autism mixed up but can NOT CATCH EITHER and VACCINES DO NOT GIVE YOU DISEASES, DISABILITIES OR CONDITIONS , Ill say this again for my American friends VACCINES DO NOT GIVE YOU AUTISM, 1 stupid and discredited scientist (Andrew Wakefield) said this and his legacy is a generation of ignorance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrew_Wakefield
Jaded Queen 5 years ago
Well the live vaccines can mutate and give u the disease it is made for but it's like extremely rare
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Thalia Lovering 5 years ago
At least she was smart enough to not allow this belief to make her antivax...
LANDON WHITTINGTON 5 years ago
yea and when you dont vaccinate your childs chances of dying go up
#20
Obama has a "weather machine," and that's why it's so hot outside. Person was dead serious, and worked in DC for the federal government for over 25 years, nearing retirement.
Truth Monster 5 years ago
He totally does, He keeps in in a vault next to his *real* birth certificate from Africa and the cure for COVID. And Cancer.
John L 5 years ago
And we still haven't found out why he wasn't at the White House on 9/11.....
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Olivia Agave 5 years ago
That is a conspiracy theory that I have not heard in a while. Yes, this is an actual conspiracy theory believed by many, fuelled by InfoWars after a series of tornadoes if I remember correctly. Came from the 2013 Moore tornado.
Meyer Weinstock 5 years ago
The missing information is what was the job that the person had, and what level of thought did it require?
CrunChewy McSandybutt 5 years ago
I had a coworker tell me that the 1999 Mars Climate Orbiter, which crashed into the surface of Mars because one of the builders didn't convert Imperial to Metric, was a government hoax. What really happened was the government put up spy satellites AROUND MARS to spy on the American people. We worked for an Aerospace company. That one hurt a bit.
Diana Dodd 5 years ago
We all know that being a government employee doesn’t necessarily mean you’re smart ... look what’s in the WH😳
#21
15 year old girl was afraid that she may be pregnant because she had unprotected sex, with another girl.
Truth Monster 5 years ago
These days that's not as stupid as it sounds. If that other girl is trans, for instance.
Night Owl 5 years ago
True. But somehow I don't think that was the case here
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Arctic Fox Lover 5 years ago
15 year olds should NOT be sleeping with people at this age, oh my lordi-
Brandy Biggs 4 years ago
Who are you to say when someone should or shouldn’t have sex? Teenagers are always gonna do it. I lost my virginity at 14 and I was considered a “late bloomer” with sexual activity. As long as both parties are consenting and being responsible, then good on them for gettin some.
Load More Replies... MarcAngelina Alcober 5 years ago
hahaha... I remember when I was experimenting when I was young... my partner and I had, for lack of a better term "dry-humped". I was a week late on my period that month... and we both thought I could be pregnant. He bought me like 4 tests. oh boy... SMH now lol
TheHolyFatherOfToast 5 years ago
Why the f**k does this come out and all of the sudden the downvotes of all the comments equals up to -46 points?
#22
A girl I used to work with was pissed that her boyfriend "only bought me 12 roses! He wouldn't even go all out for a dozen, whatta jerk!"
SoozeeQ 5 years ago
A baker's dozen (13) would have really thrown her for a loop. She would have thought she was unlucky or something to have 13.
Load More Replies... Chris DiFonso 5 years ago
He should have written off the cost of the roses as a learning experience and broken up with her.
Gogubaci 5 years ago
in eastern europe, you give an even number of flowers only to the dead, she should be grateful
Brenda Johnson 5 years ago
Maybe it would help if she counted how many eggs are in a dozen or buy a dozen donuts.
#23
That politician is already rich. He cannot be a thief.
Curry on... 5 years ago
I mean, gee, he signed the stimulus checks...from his own personal account...the US Treasury.
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Paige Garberding 5 years ago
How do they think that politician GOT rich!? Ripping off other rich people, stiffing his contractors, and filing serial bankrupticies to get out from under his bad investments.
#24
Is African a religion
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
I'd rank this right up there with "the country of Africa", which is something I still hear people utter far too often
Fieke Engelen 5 years ago
Afrikaans is a language, based on the Dutch language after they settled there. It's called a daughter of the Dutch language.
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Stephanie Did It 5 years ago
Hebrew is an ethnicity. Judaism is a religion.
Load More Replies... CrunChewy McSandybutt 5 years ago
I had an acquaintance say that Buddhism is a branch of Christianity and my head exploded.
#25
Oxygen doesn’t come from trees, it comes from the air!
Avery S Alberico 5 years ago
It's like someone saying money doesn't grow on trees, then someone else says they are tecnically made of paper...which comes from trees, until I cut in and say that it actually is made from cotton
Phil Vaive 5 years ago
I mean technically that's true. Trees just take CO2 and break it down, keeping the carbon and releasing the oxygen. They don't make it.
Paige Garberding 5 years ago
Most of our oxygen comes from diatoms in our oceans but trees capture carbon, digest it, and release the oxygen into the air. How can anyone who can read not know that!?
#26
My younger cousin (boy) in Bangladesh got bitten a monkey, somehow. My uncle (not the cousin’s Dad) genuine was worried that would make him pregnant. Some weird old ancient folk tale. He genuinely believed it, I can’t even with that amount of stupidity.
Martha Meyer 5 years ago
At least that had a basis in myth. Sone of these other people pull stupid ideas out of their a**es.
Paige Garberding 5 years ago
Superstition comes in many forms and is so persistent, it usually prevails over logic.
clive apps 5 years ago
At least he didn't turn into a were-monkey or zombie-monkey or vampire-monkey
François Carré 5 years ago
More than stupidity, it's ignorance. Complete lack of knowledge in biology, old superstitions and beliefs instead.
#27
I was on a date with a girl and she was talking about how being smart made things difficult for her. She said she felt like a social piranha........
Truth Monster 5 years ago
Social piranhas are what happens to smart people after they become cynics of humanity. Start tearing people apart.
Andrew 5 years ago
Nevermind, just googled cynic, and I am f*cking stupid. I have never seen that word. Thank You, as you have added to my insult dictionary.
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Id row 5 years ago
I actually wish we did have social piranhas. We could feed them stupid people.
Clever Dog 5 years ago
often people that claim to be smart are the once that are not. Intelligence is recognising that you can always know more and there are plenty of people that know more than you.
Paige Garberding 5 years ago
I hope you corrected her. It's unkind not to when a gaff makes someone look stupid. Unless you don't care how stupid the person looks or they are making your point anyway but it's funny to see someone who can't admit they're wrong try to squirm out from under their gaff.
#28
my mum once asked if they had wind in canada...
Dragonfruit'nrollerskates 5 years ago
I'm a roller skater, and I like dragon fruit. Not extremely interesting. Anyway, I'm probably not much older than you!
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Viviane 5 years ago
We do have windbreakers and we do break wind. So I'm guessing the answer is "Yes".
Treessimontrees 5 years ago
I moved from the UK to California, my Grandma asked if we have night here. She'd never seen a movie set in LA during the night, or after the sun had gone down.
Anonymous Panda 4 years ago
Yes. We do. 40kph some days. Also if we had snow days at school we would be at home the entire winter and most of fall...
#29
Recently my relative told me he got a bunch of credit cards and maxed them out, he plans on paying them back with next year tax refund. He then quit his job. Same relative always makes fun of me for having "book smarts" but not "street smarts", but the older I get the more I realize being able to look at my finances, live within my means and squirrel some away is a form of "street smarts" that a lot of people seem to be lacking. Also pretty much any comment on my local news facebook page. A recent one was about a renovated gas station. One person commented complaining that they spent all that money and took away gas pumps, someone else commented that they actually had added several, the only reason the line was longer was because it was new and everyone was going there to see the improvements. The lady replied back really nastily saying she had a J-O-B and didn't have time to count gas pumps, unlike some other "lowlifes", completely oblivious that she looked like an idiot. The article even mentioned that they added more pumps, but again, she has to work for a living to pay taxes for the welfare bums, she don't got time for reading that either. A simple "oh crap I must have been mistaken" or better yet not commenting at all would have sufficed. This situation is not uncommon at all.
Troux 5 years ago
"I'm too busy and important to respond to you!" - Person wasting time on the internet
Harper Hale-Gibson 5 years ago
I used to do this all the time if I felt like I was losing an online argument. I was a messed up eleven-year-old.
Load More Replies... Zoe Stillwell-Taylor 5 years ago
"Why don't u ever respond to my texts?" Me: "Cuz i don't want to."
Paige Garberding 5 years ago
The stupid and self-absorbed will always be with us. Many are named Karen.
Gage Franke 5 years ago
KAREN is actually an acronym: Krazy Asshole Racist Egocentric Nasty
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Mieke Fabry 5 years ago (edited)
I work at a water provider company: 1. is there a problem, because we don't have any hot water? they taught that we provide cold and hot water... 2. there was a massive leak, people didn't have any water: why can't they notify us? so that we know that the water is turned of... It's unexpected, so we can't notify you... 3. who delivers the hot water if you company delivers the cold water... 4. i would like to file a complaint: you discriminate me because i don't own a computer and i can not receive the invoices digitally... so i can't get a discount on the water bill... And i can go on and on, and on, but that is the top four i can remember.
#30
Q: Do you like bon jovi? A: No, I don't eat italian food.
Canadian in Cornwall 5 years ago
Actually, it's Italian, his real surname is Bongiovi, it was anglicised for the band name.
#31
Video of a lady yelling at Mexicans telling them to speak American. What the actual [frick] language is that ya hick?
KatHat 5 years ago
Fun fact: The USA doesn't have an official language. So this woman was not just racist, also stupid.
Marnie 5 years ago
I believe even countries that do have an official language, it just means that is their official language for government-related things.
Load More Replies... andate him 5 years ago
Technically, Americans do speak American English, as opposed to British English. Maybe if she had been telling at Australians or South Africans...
Clever Dog 5 years ago
isn't it strange how the stupid and the racist seem to be the same ones?!
Rod Egret 5 years ago
Well technically there is a difference between American English and British English you can study the differences but that's not the problem here. The funny thing is that I've met a bunch of those racist pricks and every time they seem to ignore that the USA have no official language... It's a bit the same idea with the bigots ignoring that the US constitution has no reference to god....
Stephanie Did It 5 years ago
Mexicans ARE American. North American. And they were speaking their own North American language LONG before this person's ancestors hit the beach. She needs to look in the mirror and repeat her rant!
#32
Had a coworker tell me “I don’t want that supervisor position. You’re supposed to get less responsibilities when you promote, not more”
Suzi Gauthier 5 years ago
Well, it does seem to work that way a lot of the time, as someone who has been on both sides.
C Pryce 5 years ago
I once told my colleagues at the off-licence we worked that I wouldn't take the store manager job if I was offered it, because they didn't get much more money for all the extra responsibility... To be told, indignantly by the current manager's best mates, "You do! Rachel gets 17pence more an hour than us!" ... Well, bless my soul, sign me up for that Swiss bank account....!
WilvanderHeijden 5 years ago
If you play your cards right a promotion actually does give you less responsibility and more money. Delegation is the keyword here. Always make sure you've got some scapegoats lined up.
Mary Peace 5 years ago
You're right, but this could be a typing error when it was put on here. Fewer responsibilities or less responsibility.
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#33
That turn signals are only optional. For a good chunk of states, it is legally required for you to use your turn signals 100 feet before turning. Only to be told later that they got a ticket for not using their turn signal.
NMN 5 years ago
Also stopping for pedestrians in a crosswalk is just when you want to, you are doing them a favor
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Mathieu Brouwers 5 years ago
The most useless job in the world: applying turn signal lights to a new car.
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
I see more high-speed traffic accidents caused chronic lane changers who don't signal than I do tailgaters
#34
Trying to do an intervention for my friend who was using meth. It was just me doing the intervention because he had alienated/stole from everyone else who ever cared. Anyway, it all started when he was showing me a video on his phone of him smoking meth in a car with some other meth head. I swear on my life this is a real conversation that happened him: I wasn't smoking meth! me: You literally, just now, showed me a video of you smoking meth. You even used the words 'I'm smoking meth' in the video. him: No but I wasn't smoking it me: You held a pipe up to your mouth, sparked a lighter, and inhaled smoke... it was all on the video you just now showed me him: It wasn't smoking because it doesn't count if you inhale it through your nose What the [frick]
Blarrg 5 years ago
Trump is an idiot, but it should be noted that the infamous "I didn't inhale" line was not him.
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#35
I had to explain to my last landlady that a 7 day long Menstruation was normal and that her massage work wouldn’t “cure me” and make me bleed for only 2 days. That was a fun conversation.
JD Lee 5 years ago
How would the landlady even know your personal business, & being a “lady” I’m assuming she had some experience with the topic... not sure I’m buying this one. (Never had a landlord offer to massage me either.)
Marnie 5 years ago
Sometimes conversations take weird turns. I turned on the radio once and heard the host say very earnestly, "But no, no! You can GENTLY plow turtles."
Load More Replies... #36
-0 equals infinite. Some kid in a discord server was trying to prove that the negative of zero was infinite. It was 24 people trying to tell him that zero was neither positive or negative and that still didn't satisfy him. His main pieces of "evidence" was "Everyone said Einstein was a mad man until he proved them wrong. Y'all watch out I'm going to change this world" He was banned 2 days later for being underaged.
François Carré 5 years ago
Apparently that kid knew something nobody else does. You should have kept in touch with him, just in case he actually gets to change the world.
Podunkus 5 years ago
It is sad that he couldn’t grasp the concept that negative numbers are numbers less than zero, positive numbers defined as those greater than zero. So zero is neither greater nor lesser than itself, therefore +/- doesn’t apply. But I’m more disappointed that he thought “infinity” was a single value.
#37
“Wait! You’ve been to Indiana? Do they really speak English?!”
Ben Dover 5 years ago
Hoosier here as well, I've been debating, if Florida people are Floridians, what are we, indians?
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
To be fair, that's an American affliction, from Paris (in Texas) to Moscow (in Idaho), and Georgia of course... Why call your places after other places then be surprised people mix them up? "I went to Georgia, and I was served in Russian"... Were you still in the States in a Little Odessa type neighbourhood, or did you travel thousands of miles, I cannot know?
Kristin Ingersoll 5 years ago
Hoosier here - I mean... legit qustion - A lot of people barely speak English!!
#38
I bought a Venus Fly Trap for my desk at work. One of the women who works in HR came over to my desk and stared at it for a long time looking confused. Eventually she asked, "where are its eyes?"
Mary Peace 5 years ago
You could have said it sees through the veins on the leaves or something. Some creatures have eyes all over their bodies.
#39
That some flat Earthers now believe the world is actually doughnut shaped...
Xandra, The Little Hufflepuff 5 years ago
No, according to Monty Python, it is banana shaped, you uncultured swine
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
It's neither flat nor doughnut shaped. Sir Bedivere in Monty Python and the Holy Grail revealed that the Earth is in fact banana shaped. Wise in the ways of science, he also knows how sheep's bladders can be employed to prevent earthquakes.
Rose the Cook 5 years ago
So instead of falling off the straight edge you now fall down the hole in the middle?
Mark Howell 5 years ago
It's actually a 'Klein Bottle', but you can't see the extra dimensions ;o)
Lynn Morello 5 years ago
Of course, Every other planet is Round like a ball, but Earth HAS TO BE Different.
#40
My classmate was reading some article "What kind of person are you according to your belly button" and asked how mine looked. I found that stupid and told her (not seriously, chill) that I don't have a belly button because I came from an egg. Another classmate heard us and was thinking what kind of egg would I be. She told me I would be hedgehog egg. But unlike me, she wasn't kidding. A hedgehog. Egg. When I told her hedgehogs are mammals, she didn't believe me, cause the birth would hurt them. She is 19.
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
Maybe she was thinking of the Australian 'hedgehog', the Echidna? They lay eggs (just like the Platypus).
Kristin Ingersoll 5 years ago
I have a feeling she wasn't thinking that deeply. LOL
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PattonPawter 5 years ago
Random fact: baby hedgehogs have very tiny spines when born, so it doesn’t hurt the mom
Liam Walsh 5 years ago
They are also very soft. The spines get harder as hedgehogs get older.
Load More Replies... #41
I was in Spanish class and my teacher asked "What was happening in Chile during the 1980s" and this dumbass said "World War II"
Brenda Johnson 5 years ago
A dictatorship was established after the socialist government was overthrown. They had a national reconstruction for 17 years, from 1973 to 1990, now they have a Democratic republic. You are welcome! 😉
#42
Islands are land that float on the ocean. The man that said this is now a tenured professor at a private university.
Samantha Lomb 5 years ago
I thought they were a congress person who asked if Guam would flip over when a new military base was added
#43
I overheard this woman trying to convince her friend that Lake Michigan is an ocean.
Nevits Yibble 5 years ago
I'm from Michigan and it certainly looks like an ocean when you stand on the shore because it's so big. I suppose you could say the great lakes are freshwater seas
Zoe Stillwell-Taylor 5 years ago
BTW i didn't mean u i meant the person who actually said this
Load More Replies... Truth Monster 5 years ago
Geography is very non-precise when it comes to naming things. For example, Europe and Asia are 2 separate continents despite being the same landmass. The only reason I can see why the Great Lakes are not able to be actual seas would be their lack of salinity. If they were seas, you could argue that it was, in fact, an ocean, as the ocean, as its currently conceived, is a multiplicity of seas. And seas don't have to connect to "the" ocean. There are landlocked seas. Geography madness. There are also lakes that aren't freshwater. And on the moon there are seas with no water at all, but that's technically not geography.
Podunkus 5 years ago (edited)
Well that’s the perspective from the field of Geography, but if you consult anyone in the fields of Limnology or Oceanography for the ecological perspective, they won’t prevaricate. Lake Michigan is a lake, and that’s that.
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TheHolyFatherOfToast 5 years ago
But in some places you can see Canada? At least that's what i think I saw. Could have been a floating island
Maripat Webber 5 years ago
Wellll.... it’s more or less an inland sea, for all intents and purposes. Has its own weather system, and the storms . . .
#44
A girl in 5th grade saw an Algebra textbook on my teacher's desk and proceeded to exclaim very loudly: "Is algebra a country?"
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
Yes, it's lying just below the T(r)opic of Calculus. Or it's more of a state of mind than a country, really.
Lynn Morello 5 years ago
Now you know you will be getting someone asking where is the Tropic of Calculus, What state?
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Bender Bending Rodríguez 5 years ago
Everyone keep in mind this is 5th grader. I'd cut some slacks why she'd confuse Algebra with Algeria.
#45
My 34 year old sister, "I digest my food very fast. I always [crap] after eating."
Donna Leske 5 years ago
I have a grown-a*s friend, 64 yr old who SWEARS the same thing. I googled how digestion works and he sneered "no, that's not right." Same friend; "mayonnaise is a dairy product, everybody knows that!"
#46
7th grade history class, 2 kids were arguing if there were 50 or 51 states. Another classmate cleared it up for them- "52, The 50 and Alaska and Hawaii." Same class, different person when asked a name of a US colony answered Wyoming. So the teacher had a good laugh about the Mayflower getting over the great plains.
Yeah, you heard 5 years ago
They're only kids. At school. Trying to learn. Maybe they don't deserve to be vilified on social media for getting an answer wrong.
Brenda Johnson 5 years ago
I was shocked when I said to a friend in her 50s, I thought is was funny that some college students didn't know how many stars were on a U.S. flag and I found out she wasn't sure eitner. What??? Really? 😳
#47
I had a neighbor hold a bottle of water outstretched and spin himself to prove to me that gravity is fake and the world is flat.
Robert Thornburrow 5 years ago
Centripetal - see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centripetal_force
Load More Replies... Kenny Kulbiski 5 years ago
Wish I hadn't read this. Now on top of covid I gotta worry about spinning off the edge of the earth.
#48
“With just $500 invested in this starter kit you too can start your own business and become financially independent.” Quit your b*******, Karen.
Desiré Yen 5 years ago
But wait if u join now and recruit more people under you, you will get 10% discount at our online store... Said one of many pyramid schemes 🙄
Load More Replies... izraul hidashi 5 years ago
I saw a preacher on a religious channel selling blessings for $1500. Sounds like a good deal!
Jane Alexander 5 years ago
Of course. A Pitcher, Lemons, Sugar, Ice, Cups and a table to put it on. Shouldn't cost more than 500.
#49
NASA? Is that a planet? Said by a classmate of mine are ours 17 years old
#50
On the bus, a student yelled: "Why is the moon out during the [Freaking] DAYTIME??!!" She was 13-15 and in middle school.
Marcellus the Third 5 years ago
A fair question! More intriguing: Why is the sun shining during the day, when it's already light anyways?! Would be much more helpful during night-time.
Maripat Webber 5 years ago
Like the. Guys going to land on the sun. Don’t worry—they’re going at night.
Load More Replies... Mary Peace 5 years ago
The moon is made of cheese. So it needs to be out in the daytime for people to get their cheese. If you watch the film Wallace and Gromit's Grand Day Out, they go to the moon to get some cheese to put on their crackers, so it must be true.
Damon Gates 5 years ago
No, Pig in "Pearls Before Swine" had it right: the angels of Heaven swoop down from On High and drop cheese into the waiting arms of Wisconsin farmers.
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Kip Otter 5 years ago
I know I'm going to sound really stupid but I have a legitimate question that I would like a legitimate answer to please. If it's day time then why can I still see the moon? I know it's a stupid question but I really would like a serious answer.
Damon Gates 5 years ago
Yes. While we most often see the Moon at night, night is the time of no sunlight, regardless of when the Moon is visible.
Load More Replies... SHSL Hope Bagel 5 years ago
some of these comments i can’t tell if people are joking or actually stupid
What do you think ?
Miomirko Buhtlić 5 years ago
Heard a first hand story about a woman who had her savings converted from Deutsch Marks to Euros. Conversion rate was 2:1, so her savings went from (e.g.) 20.000 DEM to 10.000 EUR. No one could convince her that the bank didn't steal half of her money.
Princess Procrastination 5 years ago
My cousins science teacher was very religious and when telling them about biology he would tell everyone that it was god who made it all and not the actual answers.
Caroline Driver 5 years ago
I know everybody gets brain farts, but some of these are just deep to the bone stupid, and often arrogant with it. I hope I never meet any of them
Chris DiFonso 5 years ago
To me, the most appalling this is that so many people are proud of how ignorant they are.
Bunny Wood 5 years ago
Used to run big box retail. Had a customer come in and complain that his microwave didn't work during a power cut and he only bought it as a back up to his oven. I didn't know if he was taking mickey or not, but he was 100 % serious
fuggnuggins 5 years ago
You know, I have a good friend who has aspergers. Some of these things are things that she might sometimes confuse because she tends to be more of a visual learner and doesn't process auditory input so well. She also startles at minor sounds and takes a few moments to figure out what it was. She's by no means stupid. Smarter than many people I know. Just has a different learning style. And she has been put through so much s**t her entire life (now 35) for being "dumb", when in fact the issue is that she's surrounded by putrid people who can't recognise smart, can't understand different, and don't realise that it is them who are being stupid. This is, in my view, a perfect reflection of Bored Pansies.
Bob Belcher 5 years ago
If it wern' t for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
Miomirko Buhtlić 5 years ago
Heard a first hand story about a woman who had her savings converted from Deutsch Marks to Euros. Conversion rate was 2:1, so her savings went from (e.g.) 20.000 DEM to 10.000 EUR. No one could convince her that the bank didn't steal half of her money.
Princess Procrastination 5 years ago
My cousins science teacher was very religious and when telling them about biology he would tell everyone that it was god who made it all and not the actual answers.
Caroline Driver 5 years ago
I know everybody gets brain farts, but some of these are just deep to the bone stupid, and often arrogant with it. I hope I never meet any of them
Chris DiFonso 5 years ago
To me, the most appalling this is that so many people are proud of how ignorant they are.
Bunny Wood 5 years ago
Used to run big box retail. Had a customer come in and complain that his microwave didn't work during a power cut and he only bought it as a back up to his oven. I didn't know if he was taking mickey or not, but he was 100 % serious
fuggnuggins 5 years ago
You know, I have a good friend who has aspergers. Some of these things are things that she might sometimes confuse because she tends to be more of a visual learner and doesn't process auditory input so well. She also startles at minor sounds and takes a few moments to figure out what it was. She's by no means stupid. Smarter than many people I know. Just has a different learning style. And she has been put through so much s**t her entire life (now 35) for being "dumb", when in fact the issue is that she's surrounded by putrid people who can't recognise smart, can't understand different, and don't realise that it is them who are being stupid. This is, in my view, a perfect reflection of Bored Pansies.
Bob Belcher 5 years ago
If it wern' t for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
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