22 Y.O. Woman Refuses To Be ‘Sold’ To Brother’s Friend So He Can Cover Debt, Parents Are Furious
Interview With Expert
Probably most of you have heard wholesome stories about siblings‘ relationships, particularly where the main characters are an older brother and younger sister. How sisters are spoiled, taken care of and defended from anybody who comes near them. However, these relationships are not always that beautiful.
One Reddit user shared her story online asking community members’ opinion on whether she was being a jerk for refusing to date her brother’s friend so he could ‘overlook’ his $10K debt.
More info: Reddit
Being objectified and sold like an object is awful, especially when your own brother is the culprit
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Woman shares that her brother owed his rich friend $10K and told her that she could help him
Image credits: Gabriela Pereira (not the actual photo)
He then said that his friend would be willing to ‘overlook’ the debt if she went on a few dates with his friend
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
She immediately refused and despite his begging to help him out and his friend’s messages, she didn’t change her mind
She also shared text messages that she received from her brother’s friend
image credits: Fun-Asparagus9603
Image credits: u/Fun-Asparagus9603
She noted that now her brother and parents are mad at her for not dating her brother’s friend and helping him out
A few days ago, one Reddit user shared her story online asking community members if she was being a jerk for refusing to date her brother’s friend to ‘pay off’ his debt. The post received a lot of online readers’ attention and collected over 6.2K upvotes and almost 2K comments.
The original poster (OP) starts her story by sharing that her brother’s friend comes from a wealthy family and they have a startup together. Well, apparently there have been some financial ‘mistakes’ and OP’s brother ended up owing his friend $10K. To the woman’s surprise, her brother said that she could help him by… going on a few dates with his friend.
OP told her brother right away that there was no way she would sleep with his friend, but the begging continued for days and even the friend himself decided to reach out to her. She noted that she feels like an object to clear her brother’s debt and the whole proposal makes her feel really gross and cheap.
Despite this, she added that her parents and brother are mad at her for refusing to date the man to help her brother. “They’re saying that I’m very unsupportive and selfish,” OP noted.
Community members were fully on the woman’s side and discussed that her brother was being a complete jerk. “Yea no man is paying $10,000 just for a dinner date. He 100% expects [intercourse] as payment for your brother’s debt. Don’t go on this ‘date’ , it’s 100% not just a date,” one user wrote. “If my friend told me he’d overlook that kind of debt if I [sold] my sister out to him, not only would he never see a penny from me, but he’d be owing me and my sister $10k for every tooth he hopes to keep in his mouth,” another added.
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
“A situation like this is a direct hit to individual autonomy and self-worth,” shared Shemiah Derrick LCPC, CADC, who is a licensed therapist, private practice owner and author, with Bored Panda. She added that being asked to date the friend in exchange for money is assigning a monetary value to the individual.
“It’s basically saying ‘You are worth this amount and you can be cashed in to fix my problem’,” she emphasized. “Being seen that way can cause you to feel like you are a commodity and not a person, like your opinion and needs don’t matter, or you are property that can be handed over to someone.”
Now, speaking about gender dynamics, Shemiah noted that they play a huge role in how women are treated and viewed. “In a lot of cases, there is still an expectation that women are to be in a position of servitude and sacrifice.”
She shared that women are often seen as adaptable and agreeable – and therefore dispensable. Boys are traditionally and stereotypically expected to find a job, pursue a career, and lead a fulfilling life, whilst girls are expected to take care of the home and the family. “In some cultures, this is still true even from a ‘modern’ perspective.”
Finally, if you are feeling torn between familial obligations and your own sense of self-worth, Shemiah pointed out that it’s much easier said than done, but instincts often don’t lie. “If it doesn’t feel good to you, it’s probably because it’s not going to be,” she said. “Situations like this are more common than people think as some cultures practice traditions that reduce or even bypass an individual’s autonomy.”
So in general, people who care about you and want the best for you are what you need – but even family can pose a risk to overall well-being. “As difficult as it may be, the first step would be setting boundaries or giving yourself space from your family. If they choose not to honor your wishes, more time and longer separation may be needed,” the therapist pointed out.
“In a situation like this, they are putting their needs – which are temporary – first. But your well-being, happiness and fulfillment are lifelong and only you know what the right choice is.”
Redditors backed the woman up and shamed her brother and their parents
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“I want you and have a hard time hearing "no" - I get temporary deafness - so you should reconsider” GIRL RUN DON’T WALK THAT IS A PREDATOR. HE IS LITERALLY SAYING HE DOESN’T CARE IF YOU CONSENT.
This. No way this is not ending in assault and the bro is straight out trying to pimp out his sister. No excuses, no further explanations. NO is a full sentence.
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The texts make it clear that the "friend" expects sex. And he's scary/creepy. The "I don't hear no" comments. And he talks about how her family doesn't care about her, but he's every bit as much in this as they are. This is horrible.
The texts make me think it's a made-up story. In which universe do you calmly keep responding like that instead of blocking? The whole "Indecent Proposal" setup without the glamour? It makes no sense.
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1/Go to the police. A man is aggressively pursuing you, and has told you in writing that he will not take “No” for an answer. 2/Go to the police. Your brother is knowingly trying to force you into the sec trade against your will. 3/Go to the police. Your parents are assisting your brother in trying to force you into the sex trade. 4/GTFO.
That text exchange needs to be shown to her parents, they can't seriously expect their daughter to "date" that pond scum and they need it in their face that their son is trying to pimp out their daughter.
I don't think her parents will care/believe her. They can't be so clueless.
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100% he's capable of it and no doubt has date raped before. This guy is a f*****g soulless monster.
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Indecent proposal. Irl. That's a movie btw. Her bro needs to get some diff colored contacts an a dress an take care of his own mess.
Those messages are terrifying. Can they be used to get a restraining order or something?
That's what I would do! This is absolutely disgusting.
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Get a clothing iron, hear it up and smack that creepy assclown in the face with it.
this is craaaaazy, feels like a set up for rape lowkey? like bros straight up out here admiting that he doesnt take no for an answer, and her brother wants her to go date him??
Sounds like they don't care and would be fine with their daughter prostituting herself for the sake of her brother. I bet they are from a culture where the sons in the family are the only important ones - and the daughters are fodder for whoever they can get married off to.
Load More Replies... This is far more serious than most realize. This is trafficking, or the attempt to. Please save all the texts, and go to the police. I'm sure you don't want to do that but this sewer dweller could get away with plenty. I am certain you are absolutely gorgeous; please protect yourself and do whatever you must. (Don't listen to the dimwits about actually having any.single.thing to do with the rich butt nugget. Your brother, the village idiot, should offer up himself as the sacrifical lamb - they make a great couple.)
P.S. Speak with someone about a restraining order. Just make certain someone in authority knows what's happening and sees that creep's texts.
Load More Replies... Yet another creative writing exercise. Half of reddit now is teenagers trying out these stories they came up with.
Op should contact the authorities with her evidence of HUMAN TRAFFICKING!!! Either way... 🤢🫨🤢
Run from this situation, girl. This date will only end in one way. He will get what he wants if he has to take it from you no matter how bad he has to hurt you. I'm soo so sorry. Just run.
This is complete b******t. AI ripped this off from either Indecent Proposal or Pornhub.
Jesus! Her brother is demanding he be allowed to traffic her and her folks are guilting her because SHE DOESN’T WANNA BE TRAFFICKED?! I understand there are still cultures which are behind the times by a millennium or two, but it’s 2024! Go to the police, get a restraining order, block your family from contacting you EVER, and then MOVE. Another country is good; another continent is better. (Another planet would be ideal, but …) This is sickening, and whatever culture we’re talking about can gargle my balls. Uck.
Wondering if the family is truly so stupid as to believe that this girl could date this man without being violated and assaulted, possibly drugged and even accidentally killed during the course of the aforementioned. Everyone except the girl and her sister need to go straight to prison.
Yeah this is like Indecent Propsal and awful. I honestly hated that movie. Also OP needs to take those text messages to the police and a lawyer. And her brother is seriously pimping her out no ifs ands or buts there. Ugh. My skin is crawling for her. RUN OP and Run Far!
Oh those text messages are enough to go to the police with. Brother should be arrested for procurement and possibly slavery (selling a person is counted as slavery in most countries I belive) and his friend would probably be arrested as well for tge same thing. I really hope this was a spam post but if not she really needs the police
Tell bro and friend that you will GLADLY date/sex him for the 10K. But ONLY if you get to peg friend, not the other way round. See how long it takes him to run for the hills.
I can't get over how that one person at least asks for "terms" and that if she considers it, she should get a contract. Hello!! Prostitution is still illegal in most places. That anyone would even consider this option is beyond me. I mean, if you choose to do that for a living- whatever. But to be forced into sex slavery really, and someone suggests she "close her eyes and dream of mother England"? essentially!!
cash payment directly to me in advance or no deal, when i get the money ghost the lot of them
The post is bad enough all on its own. But then in the edit she says people are DMing her to go through with it and to send pics of her eyes. That just makes the whole thing a million times worse. Poor woman.
Oh my ... leave. Now. These people don't respect you by any means. It doesn't mean any that they're your bilogical parents - they're traders, and you're what's to be sold. They may have birthed you, but obviously this doesn't make them respect you, let alone love you, let alone would protect you. Leave these awful AHs, the faster, the less damage they'll do to you!
That guy definitely set the brother up with that debt just to break him and rape his sister. The whole thing is just unbelievable. This can't be in a western country, with the family blaming her. She needs to cut all ties YESTERDAY, run and hide. This woman WILL be trafficked.
That rich guy is a piece of human turd.OP stick to your guns.I am happy you have your sister and guy friend for support..NTA.NTA.NTA.A MILLION TIMES.
She needs to report him for sexual harassment and take out a restraining order.
What will be the next the brother will "sell" when he is in debt... p!mp!!! 🤢🤢🤢🤢
Don't know about OPs place and culture, in most western countries the immediate next step after having received that messages is the police. There are countries where they not only can be trusted, but do have an entire division dedicated to take care of creeps like this. It is helpful to have this longer conversation as proof.
Surely this is a felony. Go to the cops with the texts. Soliciting or forcing someone to have sex is ilegal.
Why is she even engaging in conversation with the guy? I'd tell him and the brother to go fudge themselves and cut off all contact. The more she answers him, the more he's going to come on strong.
Whoa - this guy and your brother are certainly the bottom of the barrel in human males. You might want to check with the police . You have the texts showing your brother trying to pimp you out to this weirdo and the weirdo trying to talk you into this debt payoff. Pimping is illegal. Procuring is illegal. That your parents are onboard with this makes me SICK.
It could be a back way of asking the sister out. If the sister is interested she should go. If she isn't interested this isn't her problem.
The text exchange--along with the brother's disgusting proposal--should be brought to the attention of the District Attorney's office. Every--and I do mean every--exchange should be documented, recorded, and submitted. Hopefully, everyone involved will be put on blast. This might be an isolated incident, but it wouldn't be much of a surprise if the louse has a history of forcing his attentions on unwilling women. Moving in with a friend was a smart move; that family is not to be trusted in any sense of the word. OP's very life could be in danger.
I'd be reporting the brother and his deplorable friend to the police. I'd then be going no contact with the brother and parents! I mean, seriously, who treats family like this? The rich man needs to learn the meaning of no!!
Oh you don't hear nos, well allow me to make you feel it with my fist to your face. What an a*s.
For some reason, I thought of R. Lee Ermey (The Gunny) whem I read this.
I would consider getting this in a police statement because this s**t is going to escalate and end badly. Guy is not taking no for an answer, there is no family support. GTFO now.
This is horrible. Show that chat to the police and get a restraining order or something. And definitely NC with pseudobrother.. ewww.
“I want you and have a hard time hearing "no" - I get temporary deafness - so you should reconsider” GIRL RUN DON’T WALK THAT IS A PREDATOR. HE IS LITERALLY SAYING HE DOESN’T CARE IF YOU CONSENT.
This. No way this is not ending in assault and the bro is straight out trying to pimp out his sister. No excuses, no further explanations. NO is a full sentence.
Load More Replies... The texts make it clear that the "friend" expects sex. And he's scary/creepy. The "I don't hear no" comments. And he talks about how her family doesn't care about her, but he's every bit as much in this as they are. This is horrible.
The texts make me think it's a made-up story. In which universe do you calmly keep responding like that instead of blocking? The whole "Indecent Proposal" setup without the glamour? It makes no sense.
Load More Replies... 1/Go to the police. A man is aggressively pursuing you, and has told you in writing that he will not take “No” for an answer. 2/Go to the police. Your brother is knowingly trying to force you into the sec trade against your will. 3/Go to the police. Your parents are assisting your brother in trying to force you into the sex trade. 4/GTFO.
That text exchange needs to be shown to her parents, they can't seriously expect their daughter to "date" that pond scum and they need it in their face that their son is trying to pimp out their daughter.
I don't think her parents will care/believe her. They can't be so clueless.
Load More Replies... 100% he's capable of it and no doubt has date raped before. This guy is a f*****g soulless monster.
Load More Replies... Indecent proposal. Irl. That's a movie btw. Her bro needs to get some diff colored contacts an a dress an take care of his own mess.
Those messages are terrifying. Can they be used to get a restraining order or something?
That's what I would do! This is absolutely disgusting.
Load More Replies... Get a clothing iron, hear it up and smack that creepy assclown in the face with it.
this is craaaaazy, feels like a set up for rape lowkey? like bros straight up out here admiting that he doesnt take no for an answer, and her brother wants her to go date him??
Sounds like they don't care and would be fine with their daughter prostituting herself for the sake of her brother. I bet they are from a culture where the sons in the family are the only important ones - and the daughters are fodder for whoever they can get married off to.
Load More Replies... This is far more serious than most realize. This is trafficking, or the attempt to. Please save all the texts, and go to the police. I'm sure you don't want to do that but this sewer dweller could get away with plenty. I am certain you are absolutely gorgeous; please protect yourself and do whatever you must. (Don't listen to the dimwits about actually having any.single.thing to do with the rich butt nugget. Your brother, the village idiot, should offer up himself as the sacrifical lamb - they make a great couple.)
P.S. Speak with someone about a restraining order. Just make certain someone in authority knows what's happening and sees that creep's texts.
Load More Replies... Yet another creative writing exercise. Half of reddit now is teenagers trying out these stories they came up with.
Op should contact the authorities with her evidence of HUMAN TRAFFICKING!!! Either way... 🤢🫨🤢
Run from this situation, girl. This date will only end in one way. He will get what he wants if he has to take it from you no matter how bad he has to hurt you. I'm soo so sorry. Just run.
This is complete b******t. AI ripped this off from either Indecent Proposal or Pornhub.
Jesus! Her brother is demanding he be allowed to traffic her and her folks are guilting her because SHE DOESN’T WANNA BE TRAFFICKED?! I understand there are still cultures which are behind the times by a millennium or two, but it’s 2024! Go to the police, get a restraining order, block your family from contacting you EVER, and then MOVE. Another country is good; another continent is better. (Another planet would be ideal, but …) This is sickening, and whatever culture we’re talking about can gargle my balls. Uck.
Wondering if the family is truly so stupid as to believe that this girl could date this man without being violated and assaulted, possibly drugged and even accidentally killed during the course of the aforementioned. Everyone except the girl and her sister need to go straight to prison.
Yeah this is like Indecent Propsal and awful. I honestly hated that movie. Also OP needs to take those text messages to the police and a lawyer. And her brother is seriously pimping her out no ifs ands or buts there. Ugh. My skin is crawling for her. RUN OP and Run Far!
Oh those text messages are enough to go to the police with. Brother should be arrested for procurement and possibly slavery (selling a person is counted as slavery in most countries I belive) and his friend would probably be arrested as well for tge same thing. I really hope this was a spam post but if not she really needs the police
Tell bro and friend that you will GLADLY date/sex him for the 10K. But ONLY if you get to peg friend, not the other way round. See how long it takes him to run for the hills.
I can't get over how that one person at least asks for "terms" and that if she considers it, she should get a contract. Hello!! Prostitution is still illegal in most places. That anyone would even consider this option is beyond me. I mean, if you choose to do that for a living- whatever. But to be forced into sex slavery really, and someone suggests she "close her eyes and dream of mother England"? essentially!!
cash payment directly to me in advance or no deal, when i get the money ghost the lot of them
The post is bad enough all on its own. But then in the edit she says people are DMing her to go through with it and to send pics of her eyes. That just makes the whole thing a million times worse. Poor woman.
Oh my ... leave. Now. These people don't respect you by any means. It doesn't mean any that they're your bilogical parents - they're traders, and you're what's to be sold. They may have birthed you, but obviously this doesn't make them respect you, let alone love you, let alone would protect you. Leave these awful AHs, the faster, the less damage they'll do to you!
That guy definitely set the brother up with that debt just to break him and rape his sister. The whole thing is just unbelievable. This can't be in a western country, with the family blaming her. She needs to cut all ties YESTERDAY, run and hide. This woman WILL be trafficked.
That rich guy is a piece of human turd.OP stick to your guns.I am happy you have your sister and guy friend for support..NTA.NTA.NTA.A MILLION TIMES.
She needs to report him for sexual harassment and take out a restraining order.
What will be the next the brother will "sell" when he is in debt... p!mp!!! 🤢🤢🤢🤢
Don't know about OPs place and culture, in most western countries the immediate next step after having received that messages is the police. There are countries where they not only can be trusted, but do have an entire division dedicated to take care of creeps like this. It is helpful to have this longer conversation as proof.
Surely this is a felony. Go to the cops with the texts. Soliciting or forcing someone to have sex is ilegal.
Why is she even engaging in conversation with the guy? I'd tell him and the brother to go fudge themselves and cut off all contact. The more she answers him, the more he's going to come on strong.
Whoa - this guy and your brother are certainly the bottom of the barrel in human males. You might want to check with the police . You have the texts showing your brother trying to pimp you out to this weirdo and the weirdo trying to talk you into this debt payoff. Pimping is illegal. Procuring is illegal. That your parents are onboard with this makes me SICK.
It could be a back way of asking the sister out. If the sister is interested she should go. If she isn't interested this isn't her problem.
The text exchange--along with the brother's disgusting proposal--should be brought to the attention of the District Attorney's office. Every--and I do mean every--exchange should be documented, recorded, and submitted. Hopefully, everyone involved will be put on blast. This might be an isolated incident, but it wouldn't be much of a surprise if the louse has a history of forcing his attentions on unwilling women. Moving in with a friend was a smart move; that family is not to be trusted in any sense of the word. OP's very life could be in danger.
I'd be reporting the brother and his deplorable friend to the police. I'd then be going no contact with the brother and parents! I mean, seriously, who treats family like this? The rich man needs to learn the meaning of no!!
Oh you don't hear nos, well allow me to make you feel it with my fist to your face. What an a*s.
For some reason, I thought of R. Lee Ermey (The Gunny) whem I read this.
I would consider getting this in a police statement because this s**t is going to escalate and end badly. Guy is not taking no for an answer, there is no family support. GTFO now.
This is horrible. Show that chat to the police and get a restraining order or something. And definitely NC with pseudobrother.. ewww.
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