Man Thinks He’s Being Wholesome Praising His Wife For Taking Time For Herself When House Is A Mess, But People Online Don’t Take It Well
Most recently, we compiled stories about how the road to hell is paved with good intentions, noting that such cases happen literally everywhere and always. Ironically, the story we want to tell you today is in the same category. And more about how advertising can cause the target audience to have completely different feelings than the creators were counting on…
A few months ago, we also talked about this mother who was so tired of neither her husband nor children helping her around the house that one day, she simply gave up and refused to do anything until her relatives cleaned up the pigsty they created in the house themselves. Unfortunately, the outdated concept that it is the woman who is primarily responsible for cleaning the house is still alive, and many can’t help but be frustrated by this.
And now that you have a rough idea of what this story will be about, let’s introduce its heroes – Phil McKenzie, a 35-year-old fitness coach from Ontario, Canada, and his wife Brodie. On their TikTok, the couple post videos of their workouts interspersed with family life scenes, and a recent video went viral with over 4.2M views and around 10.8K comments. However, something went wrong from the very beginning.
More info: TikTok
The author of the video is a fitness coach and his wife recently gave birth to their fourth baby
Image credits: leansquad1
So, recently Brodie gave birth to their fourth kid, and now is gradually getting into shape. However, this is not easy to do, because both the baby and older children need attention – any parents will confirm this. But Brodie is trying, doing the program specially designed for her by her husband. Apparently, the same one that Phil advertises on his website.
Image credits: leansquad1
The husband shot a video on his wife doing exercises in a messy home while their baby was napping
And now, Phil recorded that very video, obviously to once again advertise his own training course, and in addition, to praise his wife for trying to take the time to get into shape. In the video, you can see the room in complete disarray – toys lying on the floor, children’s books, and so on, and the original poster’s wife doing a fitness routine in front of the TV, where he himself demonstrates the procedure for performing the exercise.
Image credits: Tobin (not the actual photo)
The overtext read, “Today, I walked in on my wife working out while our newborn napped. Our house was a disaster. Dishes needed to be cleaned. Laundry needed to be done. And a million other things she felt she had to do.” Yet, I could not be more proud. She instead decided to take just a little time to herself that she deserved 10 times over. Always remember that YOU DESERVE time to yourself. The mess and chores can always wait, but your mental health should never be sacrificed.”
However, the husband did not even point out that he’d do the chores instead of his wife while she’s getting into shape
At first glance, a good motivating text, but the author of the video did not take into account that the best help to a new mom from her husband in such a situation is not only praise, but also doing the chores instead of her. And the commenters noticed it too, so most of the reactions to the video contained calls for Phil to just take a broom and sweep the room, and then ideally also wash the dishes.
Image credits: Elizabeth (not the actual photo)
Most of the commenters just urged the man to clean the house and do the dishes instead of sitting on his phone
People in the comments are surprised that instead of doing the cleaning himself, the husband preferred to sit on the phone and shoot videos. “I thought you’ll help her to clean up but I guess it can wait so she can do it all,” one of the commenters wrote. “‘She’ll do them later’ as he’s sitting on his phone,” another person in the comments adds quite sarcastically.
Image credits: Roy Luck (not the actual photo)
People in the comments also urge the dad not to forget that the period after childbirth is fraught with severe stress for the new mom. “He said the cleaning could wait, lol, like yea and there goes the stress again,” one commenter wrote as well. And yet, many people just hope that after the Original Poster’s wife finishes her workout, the husband will help her clean the house, and in the future will take on at least some of the chores – after all, this is in many ways the real concern for their loved ones.
@leansquad1 Our super mom 😍🙏🏻 You can join my beginners Lean Reset Challenge now and start prioritizing yourself today!! Link in bio🙌🏻 #twinmom #workout #homeworkout #momlife #4under5 #momtok #parentingtips ♬ Emotional Piano for the Soul (Inspirational Background Music) – Fearless Motivation Instrumentals
If you have already made up your mind about this tale, then please feel free to express it in the comments below this post. And if you’ve also ever had to face or witness something that looks like this, then please share your own story too.
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The only way he could save this is if he were the one putting the newborn down for a nap, but I feel like he would have patted himself on the back and said "After I put our newborn down for a nap, I walked in...." I really hope she enjoys exercise (or its results) and that this isn't just another obligation she has to do to keep her husband happy. This comment has the same vibe as the husbands who insist grocery shopping is "me time."
I am a working mum. My partner was the stay at home parent. If I had walked in to see him taking some time to himself it wouldn’t have been a problem but I wouldn’t have started doing all the housework either. I would have helped later on. Maybe.
I'm not sure why you're downvoted here. Although we no longer typically fall into traditional roles, there are couples who choose to have one work and one stay home and take care of the home. It doesn't necessarily mean that the one who works does nothing at home but that the one who stays home does the majority. Perhaps the husband works every day and takes care of the yard while the wife stays home with the baby and takes care of the cleaning. As long as it's agreed upon in advance, I struggle to see anything wrong with it. If you disagree, I'd love to hear why instead of just getting downvoted.
Load More Replies...
These are my favorite ppl on the internet. The ppl who are so thirsty for praise and attention that they don't think out how fucken stupid their ideas on what to post are. Then their reality check is always the best. Lol. I LIVE FOR IT!
Whenever they do anything they can't have it go unannounced that they "helped me". Yikes, and all this time I thought y'all lived here too.
You know how stay at home moms go to work while their husband's workout? Well it goes both ways buddy!
My late father was a man who wanted home kept clean, so he, along with Mom, taught the four of us how to clean and taught me how to cook (I'm the oldest). He worked long, long hours a day at a hideous job, so was often utterly wiped out when he got home at night, yet, if he saw a need for something to be done, he'd just do it, or he's help one of us do it. Mom was working full time, too, but she also would just do whatever needed to be done, and though my brothers constantly fought against doing "women's work," my sister and I would get things done (not perfectly, I'm ashamed to say). Dad made the boys go out and do all the yard work, which they also hated, but it was "men's work," so they HAD TO do it, or no supper. That worked! They both really liked to eat! Now, as sexagenarians and a septuagenarian (me), we all do household chores in our own homes routinely, of course, even the grumpy old men (my bros). My sister's husband is retired, and is an excellent housekeeper!
I seriously don't see a problem with this. My partner and I have an agreement that if one of us is home during the day and the other one leaves the house to go to work.....the one at home does the housework. The person who goes out to work shouldn't be expected to come home and have to work around the house too. I don't think it's fair that everyone says "He should just start cleaning," maybe it's their arrangement that she does the housework and he does the outside of the house work. That's how my partner and I do it and it works great for us. Maybe they have the same type of agreement. He could have been a d**k and be made that these things aren't done, but instead, he was happy and proud of her. That doesn't sound like a bad guy to me......people need to stop making drama where there is none.
You don't say whether you have children. If you don't, then your arrangement sounds perfectly fair. But this couple has FOUR kids, including the baby. There is no way she can handle the kids and all the housework alone.
Load More Replies... Some men come home to a complete one-person restaurant and think it's a big deal to once-in-a-while pay double for that same service elsewhere to let her share in receiving that kind of service with him. It's time women stand up to this behaviour, share in the chores, do separate tasks and or equal parts in tasks, as in if she or he cooks, he or she cleans the dishes or the two share in the cooking and cleaning and divide up other chores. There are so many ways to divide the many tasks of home with or without children to bring up, she may be energetic enough to do the food stuff, he does the laundry and vacuuming, that sort of thing. And if he works outside the home, she doesn't, he takes a share off chore hours and ensures she hasn't got the brunt of the overall tasks of their day not spend more time awake and busy than he. For her working outside, same thing, for both working outside, balance the home chores into the work outside hours. This man who took the above video, he's lazy.
My husband was constantly shaming me if I tried to exercise without the kids. Yes, I worked full time and the kids had to go to daycare but he was in camp for two weeks at a time. I needed to do something for me. When he was home he would run off to tennis, golf, softball or hockey because " It was for his health ". What about MY health?
These replies have perfectly identified all the biased, jaded people who make assumptions and don't even recognize their attribution bias. There is so little information to go on but people have it all perfectly figured out. What happened to trying to see the best in people?
The only way he could save this is if he were the one putting the newborn down for a nap, but I feel like he would have patted himself on the back and said "After I put our newborn down for a nap, I walked in...." I really hope she enjoys exercise (or its results) and that this isn't just another obligation she has to do to keep her husband happy. This comment has the same vibe as the husbands who insist grocery shopping is "me time."
I am a working mum. My partner was the stay at home parent. If I had walked in to see him taking some time to himself it wouldn’t have been a problem but I wouldn’t have started doing all the housework either. I would have helped later on. Maybe.
I'm not sure why you're downvoted here. Although we no longer typically fall into traditional roles, there are couples who choose to have one work and one stay home and take care of the home. It doesn't necessarily mean that the one who works does nothing at home but that the one who stays home does the majority. Perhaps the husband works every day and takes care of the yard while the wife stays home with the baby and takes care of the cleaning. As long as it's agreed upon in advance, I struggle to see anything wrong with it. If you disagree, I'd love to hear why instead of just getting downvoted.
Load More Replies... These are my favorite ppl on the internet. The ppl who are so thirsty for praise and attention that they don't think out how fucken stupid their ideas on what to post are. Then their reality check is always the best. Lol. I LIVE FOR IT!
Whenever they do anything they can't have it go unannounced that they "helped me". Yikes, and all this time I thought y'all lived here too.
You know how stay at home moms go to work while their husband's workout? Well it goes both ways buddy!
My late father was a man who wanted home kept clean, so he, along with Mom, taught the four of us how to clean and taught me how to cook (I'm the oldest). He worked long, long hours a day at a hideous job, so was often utterly wiped out when he got home at night, yet, if he saw a need for something to be done, he'd just do it, or he's help one of us do it. Mom was working full time, too, but she also would just do whatever needed to be done, and though my brothers constantly fought against doing "women's work," my sister and I would get things done (not perfectly, I'm ashamed to say). Dad made the boys go out and do all the yard work, which they also hated, but it was "men's work," so they HAD TO do it, or no supper. That worked! They both really liked to eat! Now, as sexagenarians and a septuagenarian (me), we all do household chores in our own homes routinely, of course, even the grumpy old men (my bros). My sister's husband is retired, and is an excellent housekeeper!
I seriously don't see a problem with this. My partner and I have an agreement that if one of us is home during the day and the other one leaves the house to go to work.....the one at home does the housework. The person who goes out to work shouldn't be expected to come home and have to work around the house too. I don't think it's fair that everyone says "He should just start cleaning," maybe it's their arrangement that she does the housework and he does the outside of the house work. That's how my partner and I do it and it works great for us. Maybe they have the same type of agreement. He could have been a d**k and be made that these things aren't done, but instead, he was happy and proud of her. That doesn't sound like a bad guy to me......people need to stop making drama where there is none.
You don't say whether you have children. If you don't, then your arrangement sounds perfectly fair. But this couple has FOUR kids, including the baby. There is no way she can handle the kids and all the housework alone.
Load More Replies... Some men come home to a complete one-person restaurant and think it's a big deal to once-in-a-while pay double for that same service elsewhere to let her share in receiving that kind of service with him. It's time women stand up to this behaviour, share in the chores, do separate tasks and or equal parts in tasks, as in if she or he cooks, he or she cleans the dishes or the two share in the cooking and cleaning and divide up other chores. There are so many ways to divide the many tasks of home with or without children to bring up, she may be energetic enough to do the food stuff, he does the laundry and vacuuming, that sort of thing. And if he works outside the home, she doesn't, he takes a share off chore hours and ensures she hasn't got the brunt of the overall tasks of their day not spend more time awake and busy than he. For her working outside, same thing, for both working outside, balance the home chores into the work outside hours. This man who took the above video, he's lazy.
My husband was constantly shaming me if I tried to exercise without the kids. Yes, I worked full time and the kids had to go to daycare but he was in camp for two weeks at a time. I needed to do something for me. When he was home he would run off to tennis, golf, softball or hockey because " It was for his health ". What about MY health?
These replies have perfectly identified all the biased, jaded people who make assumptions and don't even recognize their attribution bias. There is so little information to go on but people have it all perfectly figured out. What happened to trying to see the best in people?
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