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87 Times The Comment Was So Good Nobody Remembered What It Was Responding To
Nothing quite lands like the perfect insult. Even better when you are not the one it's aimed at and can simply sit back, completely uninvolved, and watch the comment section descend into something that is frankly more entertaining than whatever the original post was trying to accomplish.
The internet has produced many things of questionable value. The comment section insult, at its absolute peak, is not one of them. It is an art form. It requires timing, vocabulary, and confidence that comes from knowing you have said something so good that the reply is never going to recover. Bored Panda has gathered the finest examples from across the comment sections of the internet, so settle in. You are safe. None of these are aimed at you.
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#1
Vexed Panda 1 week ago
Military wives are insane sometimes. When i was in the Navy, I married a Marine. The Marine Corps wives club was wicked mad i wouldn't join. I told them I would if they could get my husband to join the Navy wives club. They got madder.
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The art of the perfect insult has a longer and more distinguished history than the comment section might suggest. Shakespeare was, by most accounts, one of the finest insulters in the English language. "Thou art a boil, a plague sore, an embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood" is a line from King Lear that no Twitter reply has yet managed to surpass, though several have tried.
Winston Churchill's alleged response to being told he was drunk — "and you, madam, are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober" — remains one of the most quoted comebacks in political history. The impulse to say something devastatingly accurate about another person is not a product of the internet, but the internet gave it a much larger audience and a like button.
#6
Panda Monium 1 week ago
Exactly! Homeless people can even have cars… That they actually sleep in.
A study published by Monk Prayogshala found that nearly 28% of surveyed individuals admitted to engaging in malicious online activity directed at strangers, and 12% admitted their comments were extreme enough to be removed by a moderator.
Which means that at any given moment, roughly one in four people on the internet is either actively being unpleasant to a stranger or thinking about it. The comment sections in this collection are the other side of that statistic, the moments when the malicious impulse produced something so perfectly crafted that it transcended its own nastiness and became, against all odds, art.
Psychologist Sebastien Montel points to online disinhibition as the engine behind all of this. Behind a screen, people feel anonymous, removed from consequences, and freed from the immediate social feedback that normally regulates behaviour. You cannot see someone's face when your comment lands. You cannot hear their voice.
The empathy mechanisms that govern face-to-face interaction simply do not fire in the same way, which makes it significantly easier to say something devastating and significantly harder to feel bad about it afterward. The screen is not just a barrier. It is a permission slip for those bold enough to comment.
#11
Chocolate llama 1 week ago
imagine the surprised look on her face that now she could no longer make
#12
Casual Crow 1 week ago
If you've read Dungeon Crawler Carl, he's worse at breathing than at using firearms 😭🤣
So which app is home to the worst trolls? The toxicity is not evenly distributed across platforms, according to research by SimpleTexting. They asked users to rate the toxicity of major social media apps on a scale of one to ten, and Twitter leads at 7.82. It tracks, given that it is where most cancellation campaigns, divisive memes, and genuinely unhinged public arguments begin their lives.
Reddit follows at 7.63, boosted significantly by the anonymity that the platform offers and the absence of meaningful consequences for bad behaviour. Facebook sits alongside Reddit, bolstered by years of misinformation and boomers who just love to have the final say. YouTube, remarkably, was rated lowest of the major platforms at 5.38.
#13
#15
Those stats make the insults in this collection a strange kind of miracle. They emerged from the most disinhibited, consequence-free, anonymity-enabled corners of the internet and somehow gave us something worth reading twice.
The platform enabled the worst of human behaviour and accidentally, occasionally, facilitated some of its wittiest. The comment section giveth and the comment section taketh away, and sometimes what it giveth is genuinely, spectacularly funny.
#19
Daisydaisy 1 week ago
First Nations people in Australia 65,000 years - the world's oldest continuous civilisation. A rich culture of art, songs, stories, science, medicine, community and agriculture in spite of what the white supremacists try to tell you
#21
General Anaesthesia 1 week ago
Proof positive that HR is not there for you, it's in bed with management.
#30
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 1 week ago
I've seen plenty of articles here where insurance has absolutely ignored doctor recommendations, so.....
#36
#39
Phantom Phoenix 1 week ago (edited)
🎼🎵You were 16 going on 70🎶 (apologies to The Sound of Music)
#40
Beak Hookage 1 week ago
Reminds me of that other police post where it was a photo of someone's doormat that says "COME BACK WITH A WARRANT". The text on the post was "we did".
#42
Stephanie A Mutti 1 week ago
This poor guy. As a child he played such a bad character so well he ruined his career.
#44
#68
#69
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 week ago
The joke is that the archer looks a bit like Eminem, apparently.
#72
BeesEelsAndPups 1 week ago
It would be funny, but I don't believe in kicking people when they're already down
#73
Woundwort42 1 week ago
This one misses the setup. This couple went to gym together for 6 months
#75
Kristiina Männiste 1 week ago
Halo. When I had my mental breakdown and couldnt sleep, I watched Halo playtroughs to drown out the thoughts at the nights. My life felt like I was thrown into a warzone, so it soothed my nerves to see that the warzone at least had bad graphics.
#78
ABC NoThirteen FUCKCENSORISM! 1 week ago
It's EA, what else would one expect? They're one of the worst. My steam account is set up to ignore them as publisher, I can't be bothered with the crap they shove on the market.
#79
#82
Shark queen 🦈🦈🦈 1 week ago
He is baby that grew up all adults are babies that grew up I'm confused.
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What do you think ?
Nico Arroyo 5 days ago
My last salary was $8750, ecom only worked 12 hours a week. My longtime neighbor yr estimated $15,000 and works about 20 hours for seven days. I can't believe how blunt he was when I looked up his information, This is what I do..... 𝐍𝐞𝐭𝐏𝐚𝐲𝟏.𝐂𝐨𝐦
Nico Arroyo 5 days ago
My last salary was $8750, ecom only worked 12 hours a week. My longtime neighbor yr estimated $15,000 and works about 20 hours for seven days. I can't believe how blunt he was when I looked up his information, This is what I do..... 𝐍𝐞𝐭𝐏𝐚𝐲𝟏.𝐂𝐨𝐦
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