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When you feel pain in your body, you go to see a doctor, and when you feel pain in your soul, you should go and see a therapist. But still, to this day, in some societies, people seeing therapists are looked down upon and not everyone is ready to face that judgement. Usually emotional pain is easier to ignore than physical pain, so when comparing the two of them, going to a therapist doesn’t seem that necessary.
There are other reasons why one wouldn’t choose going to therapy, so for now, these people can use internet resources to better their lives. Twitter user @uhprome has done just that and asked people to share their therapists’ advice so she doesn’t have to go.
Image credits: uhprome
People were gladly sharing the lessons they had learnt in therapy, mostly about self-love and just general happiness. So Bored Panda sifted through the thread and picked some advice that might be useful. But remember that this does not replace a licensed therapist and if you’re struggling, it is best to seek out professional help.
More info: twitter.com
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Josy Bannon 4 years ago (edited)
Well said! Also applies to people who try to guilttrap you if you set boundaries
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
Had to read that twice... the double negative at the end - but yeah, so true. "I can't use you anymore? Well... forget you and your stupid boundaries!"
Salty Old Woman 4 years ago
I swear imma print this out and hang it on my desk. This is awesome.
RELATED:
#2
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
The last sentence is so important to know and realize for oneself. SO important. So, no, don't hate yourself because you're "a player", you're not doing this in order to feel power at someone else's expense/detriment. You *might* not be polyamourous - but closer to this situation... the important thing now - be self aware and act on making yourself healthier. No, this does not give one carte blanche to CONTINUE the behaviour.
Anon Anon 4 years ago
I've had this happen to me before. It was especially confusing for me whenever I developed feelings towards the same sex. Turned out that not only did I receive little respect or whatever growing up, but I had more friends of the opposite sex than the same sex because I couldn't have the latter come over at my house. So, whenever the same sex gave me attention, I confused my feelings with romance. It was just "platonic infatuation," I call it. Those feelings are always intense, but don't last long at all. And I've always developed a strong urge to befriend nice people I meet, so there's that, too.
The Twitter thread has almost 2k responses and more than 400k likes. Apparently, @uhprome asked a question that a lot of people wanted to know the answer to.
It could be that some people can’t afford to go to a therapist, they don’t have time because of work, or because they are afraid of judgement. Whatever the reason is, people on Twitter really appreciated this thread and that made it seen by even more people.
#3
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Just made myself some nice, cozy honey herbal tea <33
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GenXandEarnedItAll 4 years ago
I like the "ritualism" of making tea. The water boiling, the whistle from the kettle, water slowing changing color as the leaves soak...
Thomas Sweda 4 years ago
I must really, really like myself then, I make myself a Scotch and soda a few times a day.
Bettie-Jean Neal 4 years ago
Tea makes everything better! I swear that it saved my life when I was in ICU and then the regular part of the hospital while they were trying to figure out why I was dying.
#4
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Since I can't swim, my PTSD guy went with, "Like thunderstorms, they just come and then they go."
#5
CP 4 years ago
Learning and you can't change or control someone changed my life. You have to remind yourself of it often, though.
Easily Excitable Panda 4 years ago
"No is a complete sentence" - this is huge for me. For a lot of my cousins, "No" is the starting point of a negotiation, and it drives them crazy when I hold my ground.
Bettie-Jean Neal 4 years ago
I was going to write my own and it was "You can control your mother, only how you react to her." It still think of this and use it to this day. Especially now that I live with her. Oh the joys of being the adult child of a narcissistic alcoholic.
Random Person 4 years ago
"i may not be able to change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sail to always reach my destination"
Eagle Girl 3 years ago
It's Ok to eat when you're hungry. Trying to figure out where my "forget to eat" habit started
Simon Cataudo 4 years ago
I tell my kids that first one ALL THE TIME. I wish I’d known that from year zero.
Pagliaccio2 4 years ago
Not really sure about "it's ok to eat when you're hungry". What are they saying? It's ok to not have self-control? Or maybe they're saying anxiety eating is ok? What?
Nica Van 4 years ago
I think - and I base this on direct personal experience - that this is meant for people who deny themselves food as a way of punishing themselves or to stay thin or to have control over their own bodies when perhaps they feel they have no control over anything else in their lives. Restricting food intake is a way to take control of at least ONE thing in life so it's important when a therapist tells a person that it's okay to eat when you're hungry. Restricting food intake may lead to feeling guilty when one does actually eat. So yes, some of us need to learn that it's okay to eat food. I hope this makes sense.
Load More Replies...This isn’t the first time that advice from therapists has been discussed in a Twitter thread. In another article by Bored Panda, we made a list of tweets in which people shared their best received advice so that people could get free therapy in a way. Of course, all of these pieces of advice can’t replace a session with a real human that is trained in that field, but it’s better than nothing and maybe it can make you care more about yourself, feel better, or see some situations in a different light.
#6
Josy Bannon 4 years ago
Yes you feel like you want to die, but actually its not because you don't want to live at all but don't want THIS life, just can't see the difference clearly enough right now to change your life and let go things, like you said.
Sole Villegas 4 years ago
You have no idea how close this you wrote hit home (sorry about my english, not my native language). I sometimes feel like there is no reason to keep going and actually it could be that there is a part of me that finally has to change. Thank you so much, both to you and to the person who wrote this point.
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Amber Womack 4 years ago
Yes, but being someone with several attempts. It's not always just that simple. -You- yourself can do everything you can to do better, be better, get better, but if you have an actual chemical unbalance it is not always so black and white. I have rapid cycling Bi polar and it is an endless loop of hell, there are days-weeks very rarely months I feel okay. The same goes for either over the top no sleep, running around a mile a minute, with no impulse control, thinking the rules of life don't apply to me and I am special... Or the AT the bottom of a cold dark well looking up wet walls at a light you just don't even care to reach. So it is not always that simple. I have been trying for 15 years to find the right combo of meds that work for me. While also trying regular therapy, trauma therapy, I have tried reki, DBT, & CBT. I have forgiven myself, I have forgiven my abusers, during my EMDR sessions I was made to relive my trauma in a safe way, and "refile it with a diffrent emotion (surprisingly effective)" I have let go of the past an looked towards the future with hope ... The dosage has never been right when it comes to my medications and doctors are always just guessing with what they do. I PUT IN AS MUCH EFFORT AS I CAN BUT I AM CHEMICALLY UNALANCED! there are nights... Days... Weeks.. I stay in my closet. Sometimes people just get tired. Really really tired
Fish Boden 4 years ago
Yep, the stuff like the above is not very helpful to a good many people who are/have been 'suicide adjacent'. I also really hate 'suicide is permanent solution to a temporary problem'. It's patronising and reductive.
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Fish Boden 4 years ago
Right? It's not even about 'death'. Just an end to the agony.
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Celeste Grant 4 years ago
Here lies the problem with these posts even though they are well intentioned.... not all advice suits everyone and therapy is not a one size fits all solution. If this advice is helpful to some people then great, but if it doesn't fit your circumstances or current situation it doesn't make it bad advice, it just means it's not right for you, right now. Tweets from random people on the internet are no substitute for getting professional help. If it helps, great, but it's no substitute for real therapy especially when dealing with suicidal thoughts or feelings. Please seek medical help if you are struggling like this.
CrunChewy McSandybutt 4 years ago
While I agree with this in theory, the issue for the clinically depressed is that it's impossible to just "put it to rest."
Amber Womack 4 years ago
Oh! On that note there have actually been cases of legal euthanasia on the grounds of unbearable suffering. There are countries that you can go to (not naming names) that you can file for legal euthanasia, you see a therapist multiple times in a year. At the end of that year if the situation has gotten no better you are approved. So not all suicidal issues can be boiled down to "let it go." I am REALLY not saying this is right for anyone, I am just proving a point, I absolutely advise anyone with severe mental health issues to fight, and fight and fight, qnd exhaust all Av... But it is exactly that sometimes resources become exhausted.
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Ah. Thank you for this bit of wisdom. However I'm not sure if this is helpful for me, I hope it's helpful for others.I think suicidal thoughts sometimes, but I never actually convince myself to come through with it. It's just the thought that bugs me. Always.
Mosheh Wolf 4 years ago
Unfortunately, suicide ideation is real, is part of many types of mental health issues, and cannot be dismissed with vapid metaphors such as this. If you feel that you want to end it all, call professional help immediately!! National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. 800-273-8255
NurAkmar Almahdi 4 years ago
I had someone told that I'm the last person would attempt it because I'm too scared to die.. and love life... That moment, I felt like I should do it so the person can see it. Ah well...
#7
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Given how many of us are traumatized ----- and I don't mean offended, or upset, I mean beat up, burned, strangled, abused, assaulted ----- by the supposedly "loving family" around us? Exactly.... It's not that we don't trust. it's that we know what ahppens if we do.
Dahamada Jamawas 4 years ago
Hear that gravity? I still love you when I'm high in the sky, but you know... trauma and stuff...
Mosheh Wolf 4 years ago
Ummm, the reason that people have trust issues is because of past trauma. This is like saying "it's not a scar, it's the result of a past injury!".
El Dee 4 years ago
It's a normal response to an abnormal situation. That always stuck out to me. But we have to try to resolve them, we can't foist our baggage onto those who aren't to blame. I have been carrying emotional baggage for quarter of a century now, I'm only just now being able to feel like I am setting some of this aside..
#8
Eagle Girl 4 years ago
..or empathy. You can understand a person and still realize you can't fix them
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Unfortunately, some people simply don't understand that and need to learn from experience first. I know someone like this, whose identity I'll be keeping a secret for her sake. I hope she learns soon :(
Computernaut 4 years ago
I always thought this was common sense, I've since learned it apparently isn't.
A survey conducted by the American Psychiatric Association revealed that Gen Z were more likely to have received treatment or gone to therapy (37%) compared to Millennials (35%), Gen X’ers (26%), Baby Boomers (22%), and the Silent Generation (15%).
It could be that the modern world causes more stress to young adults, so that is why they are more likely to seek professional help, but also because awareness of mental issues has grown and people have started to understand that they are not to be ignored. Furthermore, shining more light on mental health has made going to therapy less stigmatized and judged.
#9
Agnes Jekyll 4 years ago
no one should tell you you are too sensitive--instead they should respect your boundaries
Nancy Fuller 4 years ago
My minister asked me a long time ago “ where would the world be without sensitive people?” This is still helpful 50 years later.
Computernaut 4 years ago
Being sensitive, like being insensitive, has both its pros and its cons. Like you say, we can focus on either.
#10
Håvard Hovde 4 years ago
A sentence that stuck with me is: Think of a time you did something embarassing. Easy, right? Now think about a time someone else did something embarassing. Probably you didn't even notice.
kkathleen517 4 years ago
You know this is one of the reasons I stopped smoking pot when I was younger..I would literally be in my head the whole time thinking of everything I'd even done wrong, big choices and stupid small things too. It was like being in an interrogation room with yourself..aka not fun. I've always wondered if pot did that to other people
El Dee 4 years ago
Other people are too busy worrying about all the awkward interactions THEY had. To prove this you need only pick a random person in your life, not next of kin tho, and ask yourself about what would they be worrying about. You'll likely think they have nothing to worry about at all, but we know that they DO. Proving that you forget all these unimportant instances as soon as they happen - unless it's YOU. This doesn't get rid of the anxiety but it can take the edge off it..
#11
Ian Collins 4 years ago
this goes hand and hand with finding comfort in what's familiar, even if the familiar is unhealthy. You need to be brave, and do something uncomfortable, to break a bad habit
Amber Womack 4 years ago
I was also told something similar "Our relationships will always repeat themselves. If we have always been in bad relationships no matter if you find the perfect mate, someone who will treat you like the world revolves around you, you will always try to change that person into what you are comfortable with. To most people you have a way a relationship is supposed to go in your head, and you are not comfortable until you have turned it into that... And usually you will. You will never be able to truly be able to find a "better relationship" until you at least acknowledge this and try to change that.
Hopefully this thread helped someone and they found some tips that will be useful. Sometimes all we need is just the right words at the right moment and our life can change.
Don't forget to upvote the advice that you thought was the best and if you have anything to add to this list, comment what principles you live by that make you a happier and healthier person.
#12
yellowphantom 4 years ago
#1 is great advice if you don't want to have any friends or social life.
Pagliaccio2 4 years ago
Man, I wish that were true. But it's not. If you DON'T lower your intelligence and your opinions - you'll just get hated by most people. Because most people are stupid and have shitty opinions.
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
Oh... number 3. That one ... I find people loooove to dish out that advice and neeever practice it. I know someone who says #3 **all the dang time**... never heard *them* apologize ONCE. Even when they're told straight up "Hey, you know when you [told me the wrong time, bailed, lied, took credit for something etc.] I felt awful/I felt betrayed/that really screwed up the project" - the only response is "Oh. Yeah, so the right information is this." - uh huh. So... no remorse whatsoever about the garbage you pulled? Okay, I see how it is.
Nicola Roberts 4 years ago
I do like this, I remind myself celebrating someone else's success does not devalue my own. However, I do have issue with it's ok to hurt someone deliberately?
#13
#14
El Dee 4 years ago
Boys are raised by women not to cry, to be a 'big boy' Teenaged boys are belittled by their peers boys/girls if they cry - adults will think they're weird too. Men can cry at funerals but no blubbering or, likewise, society deems them weird or weak. Whilst men are, hormonally, less likely to cry it is the fault of ALL OF US that men have had their feeling suppressed in this way. No matter what anyone says, society STILL isn't ready to see men cry in the same way as it sees women cry..
GVL 4 years ago
This is definitely true in America. In many other cultures, it is more accepted for men to cry.
Load More Replies... #15
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
I long ago forbid myself to use the following words for myself: "damaged" or "broken". No. Scarred, sure. PTSD, absolutely. But if I am here, and functioning? I'm actually doing pretty well. Also, not everyone heals the same rate, so .... don't try to fit into some paradigm of "should be". We're not all gonna react the same to identical experiences. Not even identical twins always do.
Ana-Marija Salopek 4 years ago
This reminds me of the old japanese technique kintsugi which means "to repair with gold". It is a restoring technique for broken ceramics where the brakages are emphasized with golden powder. The gold makes a unique patern on each ceramic item. The filosophy behind it is that things can get even more beautiful after they are broken just by embracing their scars.
Ian Collins 4 years ago
Great philosophy! How you pick yourself up from adversity is what makes you beautiful
Load More Replies... LivingTheDream 4 years ago
If you walk a few miles into a forest, you have to walk a few miles to get out. How long it takes depends on the work you do and the path you take.
Sasy 4 years ago
Not only can it take years to heal, it can take years to know there is trauma at all, you can have a moment decades later that causes such a reaction, that to anyone can seem over the top etc, but it can be the start of realisation and hopefully a pth to help, however that may come. Don't just make the time to heal...TAKE the time, you are so worth it.
#16
M Kate McCulloch 4 years ago
Eventually - you can see the intrusive thoughts at the door. No need to hide from them, just don't answer the door. Yeah, I'm home and No you can't come in...
#17
Kirsten Kerkhof 4 years ago
Fake it till you make it. And enjoy it when you've made it. I've been a teacher for 20+ years > the first five-six years I was absolutely faking it. But there comes a moment (if you haven't given up) when you are proficient. And heck, that feels goooooood!
Natalia A 4 years ago
Thank you for your service:) Teaching is an incredible profession.
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#18
lenka 4 years ago
I do not agree with this one. I expect people respect my boundaries and I expect them to treat me as they would like to be treated. I will not lower my expectations. This is a fundamental standard and if they cannot meet it, I walk away.
Dynein 4 years ago
Well, when something is unexpected that usually means you are not prepared and have to scramble to regain control. So expecting it doesn't have to mean you accept it as the standard, just that you are prepared for the case.
Load More Replies... Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
*Keeping fairly high expectations and pretty good standards* Whatever you say-
Dynein 4 years ago
Standard is more like... something you accept as ok, as the norm. Low expectation doesn't mean you accept subpar results as the norm - just that you're prepared to receive them.
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Sasy 4 years ago (edited)
This one is important in relationships...many expect people to care about them as much as the family ideal...a friend is not a Siister or Brother, they are people you can love and may be willing to do anything for at any cost, but that kind of love back is not always guaranteed, and they may not even understand that level, and are not wrong or less because they don't, they will give what they can, and if you do care, it is enough. This is not about accepting mistreatment or less than you deserve etc, it is just a different setting.
El Dee 4 years ago
This is SO true. We MUST lower our expectations of people. Why WOULD they help us, why would they know we are unhappy with them, why would they - people who don't know us know what we need or want. How do people we DO know have a clue what we want - we have to tell them. Overall if you lower your expectations you lower your chances of disappointment and unhappiness..
Mathew Aaberg 4 years ago
This one isn't about what you do, Its about what others do... It means ask for the best but don't be surprised when it doesn't come.
Load More Replies... #19
Susan Green 4 years ago
It took me years to learn this just because I didn’t want to seem confrontational. This would result in letting bad feelings eat me up inside. I’m glad I finally learned how to properly express myself, it’s so much healthier.
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
This is also a very good measure to determine who is *worth* worrying about. I've found that many of the people I tell "hey this bothers me" - a good chunk of people either ignored it (ie: just 100% took no notice that I said anything) or did the whole "Well what about ME? Look at MY issues, Me me meme mememememememe" - and now I know, "okay, you are arm-length people..."
M Kate McCulloch 4 years ago
This one is tough because expressing without being confrontational is difficult. Or it could be that the persona I'm expressing to cannot take being challenged so he gets all hurt and defensive over things like, did you take out the trash??
Melanie Liang 4 years ago
Or you could just forgive and let it go depending on what it is. Sometimes it depends on how comfortable I am with someone and it depends on what it is that I want them to apologize for. If I'm not comfortable with them and it's not that big of a deal then I just forgive and let go. I have a really good memory but I know I'll forget about the things that don't matter to me.
Cynthia Humphreys 4 years ago
And sometimes they will never be sorry. They might know that they hurt you but simply do not care.
Salty Old Woman 4 years ago
Yup. But that tells you what you need to know.
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Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Sometimes you can't just do stuff that makes you happy because you have so much work :')
Lorraine R 4 years ago
That happens when you grow up in a household where the rule is "No fun until all the work is done".
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#21
El Dee 4 years ago
I have had so much problem with this over the years. People refusing to respect my decision, being stalked and being flat out ignored by exes who wouldn't accept they were indeed an ex. It's a terrible position to find yourself in and it's like being unable to escape a prison. People can delude themselves that they didn't hear it (you ending things) you didn't mean it, you're just being dramatic, we can work on it - think of the kids or that you 'aren't well' The last one is made worse if you've ever had depression or other mental health issue. They will use it to ignore your feelings and gaslight you..
#22
Anon Anon 4 years ago
This is something I learned after dealing with two things: 1. Despite helping her by fulfilling HER responsibilities, my grandmother was just disrespectful and ungrateful. She constantly gossiped by speaking only of my shortcomings whenever I did things she did not like, such as putting myself first, sleeping in, etc. 2. My parents took advantage of me by having me come over to their house and do THEIR chores when it was not my responsibility whatsoever. Those two experiences really made life hell for me, and I talked to my parents about it, so hope things will change. And my grandmother, I don't talk to her much anymore. She betrayed my confidence and still am very bitter over the way she treated me. So lesson for you: Put yourself first and don't give a second thought about people who treat you like crap.
#23
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
To quote Frank Herbert (Dune): " I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Ian Collins 4 years ago
props for an awesome quote, and for getting me extra psyched for the latest movie adaption coming out soon!
Load More Replies... M Kate McCulloch 4 years ago
My go to is - be mad at whoever you are mad at and no-one else. Makes life a lot easier if my mad is only directed to what or whom I'm mad at.
#24
El Dee 4 years ago
So true! I heard something like this lately. Like it's not your job (ie solely your responsibility) to make someone's life happy, nor them yours. We must make ourselves happy. NB I don't mean we shouldn't try to cheer someone up or support them I just mean we cannot be totally dependent on someone for our sole source of happiness..
Franc Esca 4 years ago
This is my life and it appears to upset people.they call me a rat, arrogant and all sorts of things.
#25
M Kate McCulloch 4 years ago
me, at parties (especially one's I've thrown): I used to wait for the one or two people I always wanted to come and almost never did. When I stopped waiting for that person to show and enjoyed the people already there, my god, those parties (usually like a bbq or family gathering) became very fun, and must less tense.
#26
Biana Vacker 4 years ago
If you don't have a good relationship with yourself, you won't be happy in a relationship with someone else
Ian Collins 4 years ago
and, if the person you're with does not love you more for feeling this way, then you deserve better
El Dee 4 years ago
You have to remember your value as aside from this love ie the love you have for them and the love they have for you. If you don't you will store up trouble for yourself. People forget that being a parent is a little like this. If you had depression when your child was younger and pushed on through it then you may not have 'recovered' You may only value yourself as your child's parent and know that you matter in this way very much. But what happens when your child, as they all must, leaves home and becomes independent? Simple, this is called 'Empty Nest Syndrome'
#27
#28
Stephanie IV 4 years ago
Whoa. This isn’t really healthy advice at all. It belittles feelings of defeat and loss AND it belittles the ex-partner‘s feelings. You don’t feel valued by de-valuing somebody because they hurt you.
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Oh my gosh, yes. The person I was talking about in an earlier comment should really hear this. But if I were to tell her these things, she'd take offense :<
#29
PurpleUnicorn 4 years ago
I've lost count of the number of times I've spoken up, just to he disregarded. Can't seem to shake that cycle at all.
#30
Ella Aderman 4 years ago
Once you acknowledge the fact that you are (hopefully) not the same person you were 5, 10 or 20 years ago, you will stop expecting anyone else to be, and be glad that you have learned something about yourself and life instead of lamenting the "loss" of the dream of whatever or whoever that was. People and experiences show up in your live for a reason. Learn from them.
#31
Sandy Murphey 4 years ago
Yes, being able to let go of anyone who doesn't nourish you is empowering. Life is just a process of letting go...of people and things.
El Dee 4 years ago
I had a VERY long term friendship go this way. I think I finally grew up and realised that while I was always a friend that they were only a friend when they needed someone/something and it was convenient. I feel happier without them now after being friends for over 35 years..
#33
D. Pitbull 4 years ago
Very much so. This is why I get very irked by the whole attitude of: "Well, this person wasn't bad to *ME*... so I'm okay with them" Oh really? That guy is a serial cheater and thinks of respect in a relationship as a joke. You stand by that? Because by continuing to be their friend just because "Well, they didn't hurt ME" is you stating "I'm selfish and I'm perfectly okay with everyone else being screwed as long as it's not me. So I don't care about you either."
#34
Sarah Simons 4 years ago
i heard the 4 method. Breath in for 4 seconds, hold it for 4 seconds, breath out but stretch it into 4 seconds, and don't breath for 4 seconds. Do this four times.
Cynner 4 years ago
I learned the 3 seconds in through the nose, 7 secs (building up to 12) out through the mouth. Helps against hyperventilation and hiccups! :)
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Commander OwO 4 years ago
Here's another method too: Spot and name a random item. What does it smell like? What does is feel like? What does it look like? What are three things that you can smell, see and hear?
El Dee 4 years ago
The breathing/holding methods are excellent. People pooh pooh this as meditation and hocus pocus. The truth of the matter is that breathing like this will eventually slow your heart rate and 'con' your body (first) and then your brain into believing you are relaxed. It's a trick and it works. Keep going til it works, you'll be tempted to stop because 'it hasn't worked and I've been doing this for ages/keep losing concentration' It usually starts to work not too long after this stage..
#35
Ozacoter 4 years ago
I cannot agree with this. Repressing your emotions and pretending to be happy is not healty.
Laugh or not 4 years ago
I don't think it is meant that way. Both wallowing in negative feelings and repressing them are bad. It is a scale : on one hand you let the negative feelings be everything and control you; on the other Hand, you pretend they don't exist; in the middle, you have the full range of feeling and doing, overcoming and falling again, acknowledging and changing. The advise is to try rebuilding your life, not to repress your feelings. They tell you the same when you are in a depressive episode : try doing one thing you enjoy, even if you think it is too much, and then another and another. Don't beat yourself if you can't, just try again.
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miss miss 4 years ago
This is why I avoid people in my grief. "BUCK UP" SHOWS HOW LITTLE YOU UNDERSTAND AND HOW TOXIC YOU ARE.
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
Whoa, chill xd this is advice that her therapist gave her. Don't blame her. And no need for all caps O^O
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Manu 4 years ago
Don’t go out with your friends, for God´s sake, we’re in the middle of a pandemic
María Hermida 4 years ago
You can see a couple of your friends if you are careful and you meet in an open place. We are in the middle of a pandemic but we have to go on living. Mental health is as important as physical health. There's no point in surviving the pandemic if we are going to be like OCD depressive zombies.
Load More Replies... Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
This can work SOMEtimes, but not most of the time. Don't force emotions, especially not happiness. But this might work in some certain cases for some certain people.
#36
Laugh or not 4 years ago
I would change "sleep early" into "sleep enough". I am a night owl, going to bed before 11pm is a sure way to sleep only one cycle or two. Midnight or later is much better.
#39
Natalia A 4 years ago
I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time. I wish you the strength to get through to the other side of grief. It's a cliché, but I promise you that you will reach stage where it won't hurt you as much, and you'll be able to coexist with it.
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Jennifer Crompton 4 years ago
This is great advice when facing a problem that seems overwhelming or a scary decision with big consequences
#40
Easily Excitable Panda 4 years ago
This sounds nice on the surface, but it's exactly what women are NOT supposed to do in order to stay safe.
Arctic Fox Lover 4 years ago
So, I see what this meant, but... that's probably not gonna work out.
StrawberryParfait 4 years ago
5 seconds is not that short in this instance. Creepily staring at a stranger may induce anxiety in that person. The other person could also view it as aggression. This is not good advice, and could lead to some very bad results.
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Commander OwO 4 years ago
If you are jealous of someone because they have something that you don't, remember that they feel happiness, sadness, anger, helplessness and everything else you feel too. 9 times put of 10 they are insecure too.
Bill Shamblin 4 years ago
Some of the best advice I was told, “Fun is not optional.” Sounded like insanity at the time — I didn’t think I deserved to have fun, let alone being alive. But over time it’s sunk in — whomever you are — you deserve to have joy in your life.
Benji Fleenor 4 years ago
My best advice my therapist gave me, always make your bed when you wake up. You start your day by completing something and it leads to you being able to keep that mindset.
Al Jones 4 years ago
It's also something small but positive to go back to, even if you end up having a day that wasn't so good.
Load More Replies... Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Al-Anon had the best advice. LOVE FROM A SAFE DISTANCE. We can't fix 'em. We can't change 'em. We can't be near 'em, either.
Kristy Nelson 4 years ago
Just because there are others who have been through worse, doesn't mean you haven't been through things too.
Logic and Reason 4 years ago
If you can; go to a therapist (obviously only if you think you need one). Online tips like this can be helpful but they’re not even close to replacing a trained professional.
Jo Davies 4 years ago
Record yourself, using a tape recorder or app on phone. Just like you were talking to someone. When your state of mind shifts, either good or bad, listen to it again. It helps clarify your feelings and as we sound different to ourselves, you are more willing to provide a solution.
Commander OwO 4 years ago
If you are jealous of someone because they have something that you don't, remember that they feel happiness, sadness, anger, helplessness and everything else you feel too. 9 times put of 10 they are insecure too.
Bill Shamblin 4 years ago
Some of the best advice I was told, “Fun is not optional.” Sounded like insanity at the time — I didn’t think I deserved to have fun, let alone being alive. But over time it’s sunk in — whomever you are — you deserve to have joy in your life.
Benji Fleenor 4 years ago
My best advice my therapist gave me, always make your bed when you wake up. You start your day by completing something and it leads to you being able to keep that mindset.
Al Jones 4 years ago
It's also something small but positive to go back to, even if you end up having a day that wasn't so good.
Load More Replies... Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Al-Anon had the best advice. LOVE FROM A SAFE DISTANCE. We can't fix 'em. We can't change 'em. We can't be near 'em, either.
Kristy Nelson 4 years ago
Just because there are others who have been through worse, doesn't mean you haven't been through things too.
Logic and Reason 4 years ago
If you can; go to a therapist (obviously only if you think you need one). Online tips like this can be helpful but they’re not even close to replacing a trained professional.
Jo Davies 4 years ago
Record yourself, using a tape recorder or app on phone. Just like you were talking to someone. When your state of mind shifts, either good or bad, listen to it again. It helps clarify your feelings and as we sound different to ourselves, you are more willing to provide a solution.
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