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“I Don’t Care”: Woman Kicks Out Mother-In-Law Who Showed Up Uninvited While She Was Sleeping
Woman holding baby with pacifier, showing a mother-in-law conflict after uninvited visit while sleeping

“I Don’t Care”: Woman Kicks Out Mother-In-Law Who Showed Up Uninvited While She Was Sleeping

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Whether you like it or not, getting married means that you will have to be around your partner’s family. And this can be a huge blessing if they’re kind, generous, and eager to help with childcare. But it can also be a nuisance, if it means you now have people in your life who feel entitled to your time and energy.

One new mom vented to the internet about her husband’s mother, who has a habit of showing up unannounced. Below, you’ll find the full story that she shared on Reddit detailing why she’s tired of being polite, as well as some of the replies invested readers shared.

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    In-laws are often very good at overstepping boundaries

    Image credits: Alexander Grey (not the actual photo)

    One woman had to kick her MIL out of the house after she kept showing up uninvited

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    Image credits: Specialist_Cattle597

    Image credits: Selcuk S (not the actual photo)

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    The MIL joke has a long and storied history

    While “annoying mother-in-law” jokes might be the territory of comedy-hacks these days, this worn out genre does have some pedigree. While many jokes in history go unrecorded, no doubt due to scribes being joy-kills, some of the first instances appear to come from the ancient Romans.

    The poet Juvenal, in Satire VI, jokes that no one can be truly happy while their mother-in-law is still alive. Given the Roman attitude towards women, this is possibly one of the most intense cases of punching down ever recorded. Then again, there are enough horror stories about in-laws that at least some of these jokes start to truly make sense. It wouldn’t be the first time an overbearing mother was the reason for relationship drama.

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    This is evidence that these jokes go back even further, if this sort of reference can be made without further elaboration. For whatever reason, unlike a lot of other ancient humor, this sort of joke could be made today and still get a few laughs every and then. Fortunately, without context, it has started to appear more like hack-humor.

    Interestingly, most “current” mothers don’t actually find these jokes that offensive. One survey found that actual mothers-in-law saw the jokes as inoffensive, although not particularly funny. The reasoning was simple enough, they believed that they didn’t exhibit this sort of behavior, so these jokes simply didn’t apply to them.

    Image credits: Priscilla Du Preez / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    Personal boundaries are very important in any kind of relationship

    The real issue isn’t that this woman is the wife’s mother-in-law, although that complicates things. It’s that she seems to be entirely unaware of normal personal boundaries. While some might see them as limiting, the truth is that boundaries are actually entirely essential for healthy relationships. Otherwise, as this story demonstrates, one person will just develop more and more resentment towards the other. This is often the genesis for so many breakups and divorces.

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    This can be particularly difficult with family, as a lot of the “normal” social norms are not there. After all, your parents have probably changed your diaper, how exactly do you make them understand what they can and cannot do? In laws can be even worse, as the only one who can really stop them is your partner, and, as this story shows, sometimes one’s partner does not at all hold the same boundary.

    As many of the commenters noted, most of us would never show up at a close friend’s home unannounced, so why exactly should an in-law feel like this is acceptable. Unfortunately, this woman is going to need to sit down with her husband and make him understand. The fact that he is “embarrassed” means that he has fully overlooked her needs and wants in this situation, which is not the stuff that lasting relationships are made of. There are countless failed relationships that originated in the things people chose to keep to themselves.

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    Some readers wanted more details on the situation

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    The majority thought the new mom was not at all to blame

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    However, some thought her reaction was too much

    And a few thought she was absolutely in the wrong

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    What do you think ?
    Stardrop
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this... has been on BP before. i cant prove it but i feel like ive read this like months ago.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gonna say YTA...not for what she did but for admitting that this has been a constant issue. Which means this was an issue before you got married and probably before you got engaged...this is something you should've handled before saying yes and I do and now you want to be mad about it now there's a baby. If it was handled properly on day 1 you probably would've realized that your then BF was a mamas boy to a boundaryless harpy who will never respect you and you could've moved on to marry and have a baby with a real man!

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    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm always amazed by the YTA's feeling that everyone should bend over and accept any and all behavior because being nice/kind/dealing with their own things doesn't help resolve things when the other person is being unreasonable. Maybe if all parties were acting reasonably, the issues would never have happened. The bottom line to any conflict is that someone has to win, someone has to lose, or it comes to a reasonable understanding. If one person isn't interested in that, there's no reason to be polite. This is certainly one of those cases.

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    Stardrop
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this... has been on BP before. i cant prove it but i feel like ive read this like months ago.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gonna say YTA...not for what she did but for admitting that this has been a constant issue. Which means this was an issue before you got married and probably before you got engaged...this is something you should've handled before saying yes and I do and now you want to be mad about it now there's a baby. If it was handled properly on day 1 you probably would've realized that your then BF was a mamas boy to a boundaryless harpy who will never respect you and you could've moved on to marry and have a baby with a real man!

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    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm always amazed by the YTA's feeling that everyone should bend over and accept any and all behavior because being nice/kind/dealing with their own things doesn't help resolve things when the other person is being unreasonable. Maybe if all parties were acting reasonably, the issues would never have happened. The bottom line to any conflict is that someone has to win, someone has to lose, or it comes to a reasonable understanding. If one person isn't interested in that, there's no reason to be polite. This is certainly one of those cases.

    Load More Comments
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