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“Glad That Happened”: Woman Stunned By In-Laws’ Reaction To Her Emergency Surgery
Woman in hospital bed recovering from surgery, showing pain and lack of support during recovery with two kids.
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“Glad That Happened”: Woman Stunned By In-Laws’ Reaction To Her Emergency Surgery

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Being rushed to the hospital and undergoing emergency surgery can be a scary ordeal. It really helps if you have a good support structure to step in and sort out anything you’re unable to. Especially if you are a parent.

When one woman found herself in the operating theater recently, the last thing she expected was for her mother-in-law to make her life even harder. But instead of empathy or an offer to assist with the kids, the MIL responded with, “I’m glad that happened.” The woman, who doesn’t have parents of her own, says her in-laws are “mad” that she isn’t able to care for her children during this time.

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    She expected words of sympathy and support when she suddenly had to have emergency surgery

    Image credits: reewungjunerr / freepik (not the actual photo)

    Instead, she was met with coldness and anger from her in-laws

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    Image credits: vailery / freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: moodymelons23

    How to find your village when raising a child…

    It’s said that it takes a village to raise a child. And it can be nearly impossible to do it without some level of support, even on the best of days.

    “Getting support is good for you and good for your child,” notes the Raising Children Network site. “That’s because it helps you look after yourself and give your child what they need to grow and thrive.”

    Support isn’t just about someone to babysit if or when needed. According to the site, there are three main types of support that parents, especially single parents, need. These include practical support that helps you to manage new or complex tasks or lighten your workload, emotional or personal support to boost your confidence, mental health, and wellbeing. And support in the form of information or advice, to help you with parenting and decision-making.

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    As a parent, one of the best things you can do is ask for help if you need it, and say yes when it’s offered. “People like to help, and they’re usually glad if you ask them to do something specific,” say the experts at Raising Children Network.

    Some parents feel isolated and alone, and believe there’s nobody to support them. But often, it just takes some creative thinking to realize that’s not always the case.

    Firstly, your friends might be more willing than you think. “Support from friends can sometimes be less complicated and emotional than support from family,” notes the parenting site.

    If you don’t have friends to step in, you could consider turning to your local communities. There might be people from a child care center, school, local club, religious group, or support group that can help you through the hard times.

    Work colleagues, or people you meet studying or training, are also an option when it comes to a support network. This doesn’t mean you should leave your kids with someone you just met. But rather, don’t be afraid to reach out to them for a chat or vent, to help take your mind off parenting for a while. There may be practical things they can assist with, too.

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    Counselors or other professionals can offer a safe, neutral place to explore your situation and help you come up with solutions and strategies, suggests the site. It adds that telephone helplines or online counseling might be good if you need to spend a lot of time at home, or just need someone to listen sometimes.

    The experts advise surrounding yourself with trustworthy, encouraging, and reliable people who support your dreams, hopes, and goals.

    “And if there are some critical, unhelpful or even hostile people in your life, it might be good to keep them at a distance,” adds the network.

    Image credits: dotshock / freepik (not the actual photo)

    Loads of people showered the woman with support, and some had similar stories of their own

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    Some people reminded the mom that her kids are her responsibility

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

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    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

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    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

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    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, Community member

    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    What do you think ?
    Trillian
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The whole society is the problem, because in most countries, the husband could stay home to watch the kids or take PTO. How do you even live a life with children where nothing ever can go wrong or there is no room for emergencies?

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait until the parents need support... I'd also be cutting them off anyway since clearly they don't really love those grandchildren enough to look after them during a medical incident. If they complain, I'd be saying since you showed how much you cared then, I'm showing you the same respect.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm concerned OP doesn't have any friends. Not that it would necessarily help in the situation, but she mentions two that her husband has, but she has no support network of her own. A lot of us can't rely on family but being without a support network of any kind, and raising kids must be very hard and even further isolating. She says her husband is loving, but it's usually a sign of coercive control if one partner doesn't have friends outside of the others social circle . I hope she's ok.

    spacer
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    op also mentioned being autistic and might have issues with maintaining relationships or might get easily overwhelmed with people. not everyone wants a social life or have the skills needed to grow one.

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The whole society is the problem, because in most countries, the husband could stay home to watch the kids or take PTO. How do you even live a life with children where nothing ever can go wrong or there is no room for emergencies?

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait until the parents need support... I'd also be cutting them off anyway since clearly they don't really love those grandchildren enough to look after them during a medical incident. If they complain, I'd be saying since you showed how much you cared then, I'm showing you the same respect.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm concerned OP doesn't have any friends. Not that it would necessarily help in the situation, but she mentions two that her husband has, but she has no support network of her own. A lot of us can't rely on family but being without a support network of any kind, and raising kids must be very hard and even further isolating. She says her husband is loving, but it's usually a sign of coercive control if one partner doesn't have friends outside of the others social circle . I hope she's ok.

    spacer
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    op also mentioned being autistic and might have issues with maintaining relationships or might get easily overwhelmed with people. not everyone wants a social life or have the skills needed to grow one.

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