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“He Drowned”: Woman Prays That DIL Loses Someone That She Loves, Gets What She Wished For
Woman looking shocked and contemplative, reflecting on mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband.

“He Drowned”: Woman Prays That DIL Loses Someone That She Loves, Gets What She Wished For

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Losing a loved one can put your entire life on hold. Suddenly, nothing makes sense, and even the simplest of tasks require an immense amount of strength. Grief is overwhelming and all-encompassing. So it’s important for everyone struggling with a significant loss to have a strong support system.  

But when one woman tragically lost her husband, she found herself having to deal with a mother-in-law who has always made it clear that she doesn’t like her. Below, you’ll find the full story that she shared on Reddit detailing the nasty messages she found on her late husband’s phone, as well as some of the replies concerned readers shared.

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    This woman’s mother-in-law has always made it clear that she doesn’t like her

    Woman looking shocked and thoughtful, reflecting emotions after discovering mother-in-law's hatred following husband's death

    Image credits: aetb / envato (not the actual photo)

    But after losing her husband, she found out just how deep her mother-in-law’s hatred went

    Woman shocked to find out how much mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband in a tragic work accident.

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    Woman shocked to discover extent of mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband and strained family relationships.

    Text showing a woman shocked to find out how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband.

    Alt text: Text describing a woman shocked by her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband, highlighting family conflicts.

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    Text excerpt describing a woman shocked by her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

    Hand reaching out of water, symbolizing a woman shocked to find out her mother-in-law hates her after losing husband.

    Image credits: Pressmaster / envato (not the actual photo)

    Alt text: Woman shocked discovering how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband during a difficult family funeral.

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    Text describing a woman shocked by her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband, mentioning funeral disputes and inheritance issues.

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    Text excerpt about a woman expressing pain over her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

    Alt text: Woman shocked to discover how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband, expressing grief and resentment.

    Image credits: littlepixiee

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    Grief is overwhelming and often causes us to behave in ways that we wouldn’t normally

    It’s hard to imagine the pain that both women in this story are experiencing. Losing a spouse and losing a child are horrific nightmares that no one ever wants to experience, as both are unexpected and extremely painful to process. 

    Cruse Bereavement Support notes that grief typically begins with shock and numbness. It can take a while to fully understand that your life has been turned upside down and will never be the same again. But once reality sets in, the pain often hits extremely hard. It may feel like you’ve lost a piece of yourself or that you no longer know where your place in the world is. 

    Alongside the pain, it’s normal to feel some anger as well. After a significant loss, it’s understandable to feel like it’s not fair or to try to blame someone or something for what happened. But in looking for someone to point the finger at, you might even start to blame yourself. It’s common to feel guilt as well, as many people tell themselves that they could have done something differently to prevent this tragic outcome.

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    Unfortunately, grief is also often accompanied by depression. It can feel like life is meaningless without your loved one, and you may struggle to find purpose in anything. If this happens, it’s important to seek help. No one should experience bereavement without support. 

    And some people even experience physical symptoms while grieving, as the pain can be so powerful that it actually manifests in physical ailments. Or, you might begin “seeing” and hearing your loved one, as your brain is working on processing the fact that they’re no longer with you.

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    Understandably, many people won’t be acting like themselves when grieving. It’s not a normal situation to be in, so it’s expected for individuals to be behaving differently than usual. However, in this specific situation, it sounds like the woman’s mother-in-law has had it out for her for years. And unsurprisingly, this is not an uncommon issue.

    Many mothers project their own issues and insecurities onto their daughter-in-laws

    Image credits: Kateryna Hliznitsova / unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    According to a study conducted by psychologist Terri Apter, a whopping 60% of married women admit that their relationship with their mother-in-law causes them long-term unhappiness and stress. 

    But as far as why so many mothers don’t want to be friends with their daughter-in-laws, Apter says it’s because they’re both competing for the same position in the family: primary woman. “Each tries to establish or protect their status. Each feels threatened by the other,” she writes in her book What Do You Want From Me? 

    Some theorize that these bitter mother-in-laws are actually just jealous and don’t know how to channel their frustration. “She may not realize that she hates herself, but that’s often what it is,” TikToker @heyjanellemarie says in a video.

    “It could be anything: She hates the way that you feel empowered to say no to things that you don’t like. She hates the way that you have such a good job and she never had that,” Janelle continues. “She hates the way that her son treats you so well, and she never had that in her own partnership in her marriage.”

    As frustrating as it can be to have a mother-in-law who you just can’t get along with, sometimes, you just have to remind yourself that you’re not the problem. And you didn’t do anything to trigger her hatred.  

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    We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. How would you react if you were in this woman’s shoes? Then, if you’d like to check out another Bored Panda article featuring similar family drama, look no further than right here

    Readers left supportive messages for the author and encouraged her to stay as far away from her mother-in-law as possible

    Woman shocked to discover how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband, revealing family hostility and grief.

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    Comment expressing sympathy and advice to a woman coping with the loss of her husband and mother-in-law's hatred.

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    Text message expressing sympathy and advice about a mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband.

    Screenshot of an online comment expressing sympathy and advice related to a mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

    Comment expressing sympathy and hope woman can remove mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

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    Woman looking shocked and distressed, reacting to discovering her mother-in-law’s strong dislike after losing her husband.

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    Comment expressing sympathy about a woman’s struggle with her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

    Comment expressing sympathy for a woman shocked by her mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband.

    Comment expressing sympathy and advising about toxic mother-in-law after a woman loses her husband and faces family conflict.

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    Text message with supportive advice to a woman coping with loss, discussing mother-in-law hatred and healing after losing husband.

    Alt text: Woman shocked to discover how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband, facing harsh family treatment.

    Woman shocked discovering how much mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband, highlighting family conflict and emotional tension.

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    Screenshot of an online comment expressing sympathy about a woman shocked to find her mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband.

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    Comment expressing sympathy about a mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband and coping with grief.

    Comment expressing sympathy for loss and advising to keep messages showing mother-in-law’s unstable behavior after husband’s death.

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    Comment expressing sympathy about a husband’s difficult relationship with his mother and mother-in-law’s hostility after loss.

    Alt text: Woman shocked by how much her mother-in-law hates her after losing her husband, reading emotional online comments.

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    Text showing sympathy and discussing how a mother-in-law hates her daughter-in-law after losing her husband.

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    Text post offering compassion to woman shocked by mother-in-law's hate after losing her husband, sharing support and love.

    Comment expressing condolences and advice about handling a mother-in-law's hatred after losing a husband.

    Woman shocked discovering extent of mother-in-law’s hatred after losing her husband, with emotional and tense expression.

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    Screenshot of a Reddit comment expressing sympathy and support after a woman discovers her mother-in-law's hatred following her husband’s death.

    Screenshot of an online comment expressing sympathy for a woman shocked by her mother-in-law's hatred after losing her husband.

    User comment expressing sympathy and advice about protecting oneself from mother-in-law hostility after losing husband.

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

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    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

    What do you think ?
    arthbach
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One piece of advice: a person's mind will be brought back to this hatred again and again. When it happens, re-phrase it. Don't make it about mother-in-law's hatred, think about how the husband loved and protected his family from the crazy and hurtful comments. Every time she comes to mind, imagine the husband walking in front of her, totally preventing her from being seen. All that's visible is a smiling, protective husband. . . . This technique can be used in lots of different situations. A painful, destructive image is replaced with love. It's hard to do initially, but it makes such a difference. You choose love rather than hate.

    🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oddly enough, I've had this. About the second time I met my future MIL (we were only dating at the time), she told me "He's not in the will, you know". Being only 19 years old, I didn't process it as a gold digger insult and thought my boyfriend was just weirdly neglected as a rejected youngest son! Nineteen years later, he died, and MIL got her boomerang curse, ... he wouldn't be in her will.

    Emilu
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I could give OP a hug. So sorry for her loss. And I also wish I could give MIL a slap. She got what she wanted; just that it happened to bite her on the @ss as well.

    KrazyChiMama
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have such a kind heart, Emilu….dont ever let anyone/anything take that from you

    Load More Replies...
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    arthbach
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One piece of advice: a person's mind will be brought back to this hatred again and again. When it happens, re-phrase it. Don't make it about mother-in-law's hatred, think about how the husband loved and protected his family from the crazy and hurtful comments. Every time she comes to mind, imagine the husband walking in front of her, totally preventing her from being seen. All that's visible is a smiling, protective husband. . . . This technique can be used in lots of different situations. A painful, destructive image is replaced with love. It's hard to do initially, but it makes such a difference. You choose love rather than hate.

    🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oddly enough, I've had this. About the second time I met my future MIL (we were only dating at the time), she told me "He's not in the will, you know". Being only 19 years old, I didn't process it as a gold digger insult and thought my boyfriend was just weirdly neglected as a rejected youngest son! Nineteen years later, he died, and MIL got her boomerang curse, ... he wouldn't be in her will.

    Emilu
    Community Member
    4 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I could give OP a hug. So sorry for her loss. And I also wish I could give MIL a slap. She got what she wanted; just that it happened to bite her on the @ss as well.

    KrazyChiMama
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have such a kind heart, Emilu….dont ever let anyone/anything take that from you

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
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