“My Gut Told Me To Look In The Box”: Woman’s Life Turns Upside Down After Opening Husband’s Shoe Box

Being cheated on hurts beyond belief. However, at some point, you need to come to terms with what happened, start the healing process, and move on. If you don’t, you might end up poisoning your new relationships.

Redditor u/Relevant_Young_5607 asked the AITAH online group for advice about her imploding relationship. She shared that she’s considering getting divorced after finding out that her husband is still obsessed with his ex-girlfriend after taking a peek into his super secret box of mementos.

Scroll down for the full story and the advice the internet gave the woman. Bored Panda has reached out to the author for comment, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.

It’s painful to realize that your spouse might still have unresolved feelings for their ex, even years and years after their breakup

Couple arguing in kitchen, woman covering face in distress, representing conflict over husband and his ex relationship issues.

Image credits: Pressmaster / envato (not the actual photo)

A woman asked the internet to weigh in on a sensitive situation. She revealed how her spouse keeps a secret box of things that remind him of his ex-partner

Text excerpt discussing wanting to divorce husband of 6 years due to issues involving his ex.

Text excerpt from a personal story about wanting to divorce husband of 6 years because of his ex issues.

Text excerpt about relationship struggles involving a husband’s ex, highlighting reasons for divorce concerns.

Text excerpt discussing a workday story related to wanting to divorce husband because of his ex relationship issues.

Woman confronting husband at home, feeling fearful about his behavior related to his ex, considering divorce after 6 years.

Text excerpt from a personal story about relationship issues and feelings of distrust involving a spouse’s secretive behavior.

Box containing photos, bracelets, and a wedding picture altered by husband’s ex, highlighting issues with his past and divorce concerns.

Hands holding several printed photos, reflecting on past memories related to husband and his ex in a personal setting.

Image credits: Lisa from Pexels / pexels (not the actual photo)

Text excerpt from a heated argument in a marriage about micro cheating and confronting issues related to husband’s ex.

Text excerpt explaining emotional conflict and broken trust in a marriage related to issues with husband’s ex.

Text about wanting to divorce husband due to obsession with his ex, feeling manipulated by phone calls and texts.

Text post expressing uncertainty about a situation and seeking a second opinion on divorce and ex issues.

Image credits: Relevant_Young_5607

It’s a serious issue if your significant other still has a strong emotional attachment to the things that belonged to their ex

It’s painful to realize that your significant other might still have feelings for their ex. What hurts even more is if you feel that you’re more of a consolation prize or a replacement for their ex than a full-fledged partner.

Though it’s certainly possible to move past these issues, that’s easier said than done. It requires lots of consistent, mutual effort over a long period of time. It means being fully honest and transparent about your feelings. And you might need the help of a couple’s therapist to help sort your feelings.

According to Katherine Cullen, MFA, LCSW, some of the signs that someone might still not be over their ex-partner include the following:

• They often talk very negatively about them
• They get intensely emotionally worked up when the topic of their ex comes up
• They might shut down completely (stonewall) when asked about them
• They covet objects that are linked to their ex-partner
• They hesitate and are reluctant to commit to new relationships
• They constantly stay in touch with their ex, whether in person or digitally
• They stalk their ex on social media

To be clear, it’s not necessarily unhealthy to have a physical or digital album of photos that includes some snapshots of your ex-partners. However, things get iffy if items related to your exes are in easily accessible spots or if you display them publicly at home or on social media.

“Likewise, repeatedly wearing items of clothing, jewelry, or keeping expensive gifts on display that belonged to or were given to someone by an ex is a pretty strong hint they’re still somewhat hooked on them. A readiness to move forward is often accompanied by a letting go of those objects we associate with people no longer in our lives,” Cullen explains in a post on Psychology Today.

Furthermore, someone clearly has a hard time moving on from their exes if they spend time looking at their social media accounts and interacting with the content they share online. “Each digital interaction with them or their image reinforces emotional attachment. Beware of new prospective partners who digitally stalk their former lovers.”

The first step toward moving on is becoming more self-aware and realizing that you might still have feelings for your ex

Image credits: zoranzeremski / envato (not the actual photo)

Meanwhile, self-awareness is incredibly important in moving on. Grady Shumway, LMHC, explained to Marriage.com that a big step towards healing is realizing that you’re not over your ex.

“It’s okay to take time to work through those lingering feelings. Talking things out with friends, family, or even a therapist can really help you deal with these emotions and find closure. Just remember to be kind and patient with yourself as you heal and grow,” he says.

As per Marriage.com, some of the biggest indications that you might still not be over your ex-partner are these:

• You look for the smallest opportunities to get back in touch with your ex
• Everything in your daily life seems to remind you of them
• You compare your new relationships with what you had with your ex
• You keep checking what they’re doing on their social media accounts
• You value and possibly even display the gifts they gave you
• You still envision them as part of your life in the future
• You look for excuses to be in the areas they visit frequently
• You dream about them
• You get jealous or protective of them
• You make decisions in your life based on your ex’s preferences

What are your thoughts, Pandas? How would you react if you found out that your significant other has a secret box full of mementos from their ex, constantly reminiscing about their past relationship? What advice would you give the author of the viral post if you could talk to her directly? Would you consider divorce? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Here’s how some internet users reacted to the heartfelt story. They thought the woman was right to be upset

Reddit comment discussing emotional cheating and reasons for divorce related to husband’s attachment to his ex.

Reddit comment discussing relationship issues and wanting to divorce husband due to concerns involving his ex.

Comment on a forum about divorce due to issues with husband’s ex, discussing relationship and legal advice.

Comment text about betrayal and divorce due to husband’s ex, reflecting on emotional pain and self-worth after 6 years of marriage.

Comment text on a forum discussing divorce and issues related to husband’s ex after six years of marriage.

Screenshot of a forum comment discussing wanting to divorce husband of 6 years because of his ex relationship issues.

Comment discussing relationship struggles and considering divorce due to issues with husband’s ex after six years of marriage.

Screenshot of an online forum comment discussing wanting to divorce husband because of issues related to his ex.

Comment on a forum discussing wanting to divorce husband of 6 years because of issues with his ex and lingering feelings.

Comment discussing a husband’s love for his ex and mentioning a creepy photo box in a relationship conflict.

Comment advising divorce due to husband’s attachment to his ex and replacing spouse’s face in wedding photo.

Reddit comment stating NTA and suggesting he needs therapy related to divorce over husband’s ex discussion.

Comment discussing red flags and age difference concerns in a relationship involving a husband’s ex and potential divorce.

Text post discussing relationship challenges and insights on dealing with manipulation in marriages involving ex-partners.

Text message screenshot discussing relationship issues related to divorce and husband's ex, sharing advice and warnings.

Comment section screenshot showing a user advising against manipulation in a divorce over husband’s ex dispute.

Comment discussing a husband’s obsession with his ex and red flags in a marriage after six years.

Comment discussing emotional feelings for a husband’s ex impacting desire to divorce after six years of marriage.

Screenshot of forum comment discussing marriage counseling and divorce due to issues with husband's ex in relationship advice thread.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a husband’s ex affecting a 6-year marriage and potential divorce considerations.

Red flag in marriage over husband’s behavior with ex’s pictures causing conflict and divorce considerations.

Comment expressing willingness to confront situation about husband’s ex in a relationship and divorce concerns.

Text discussing divorce due to husband's obsession with his ex, emotional struggles, and relationship challenges.

Comment on online forum discussing divorce with husband of 6 years due to issues involving his ex, expressing concern and advice.

However, a few people also thought she was guilty in this situation, too

Comment discussing divorce due to unresolved feelings for husband's ex and concerns about emotional boundaries.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing the dilemma about divorcing a husband due to issues related to his ex.

Comment discussing relationship advice about divorce over husband’s ex and handling old memories in marriage counseling.

Comment from user APixelWitch expressing strong feelings about a toxic relationship and referencing divorce over husband's ex.

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