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Parents Abandon Teen At His Graduation, He Refuses To Put His Cap And Gown On Again For Photos
Interview With AuthorCongratulations, Class of 2024! You did it!
Graduation day is an extremely exciting moment in all students’ lives. After working hard for years and looking forward to holding a diploma in your hand, you finally get the chance to walk across that stage and say goodbye to the institution that provided you with a great education.
Because this day is so special, most graduates expect to leave the ceremony and find their closest friends and family members waiting for them. So when one teen realized that his parents left the ceremony prematurely, he decided that he was no longer in the mood for photos. Below, you’ll find the full story that the teen recently shared on Reddit, as well as a conversation between the graduate and Bored Panda.
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Graduation is an extremely important day for students
Image credits: Charles DeLoye (not the actual image)
So when this teen realized that his parents left the ceremony without telling him, he decided he was no longer in the mood for photos
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual image)
Image credits: FunnyAffectionate795
Later, the teen responded to several readers and shared more information about the situation
Graduation is an important accomplishment that deserves to be celebrated
Graduation is a huge accomplishment. Whether you’ve graduated from high school, university, or just earned your PhD, it’s always worth celebrating. In fact, not everyone earns even a high school diploma, as only 87% of people in the United States have one. And in some states, graduation rates are as low as 77%. Students deserve to be proud of their hard work in high school and celebrate completing this milestone, and it’s only natural for them to want to have their loved ones around cheering them on.
To find out more about this situation, we reached out to the teen who posted this story online, Reddit user FunnyAffectionate795. He was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and provide an update on what’s happened since.
“My parents haven’t stopped asking me to take photos, but my mom took a screenshot of the photo my school posted of me and made it her profile photo,” he shared. “That happened yesterday, and they still asked me to put on my cap and gown for another photo.”
“My parents keep apologizing to me and telling me that they didn’t intend to hurt my feelings, and they just want a picture to remember my graduation,” the graduate continued. “I still refused. I don’t understand why they’d want a picture to remember something they weren’t even at, and I told them this too. They are still acting like I’m being unfair to them.”
Image credits: Emily Ranquist (not the actual image)
“I just wanted someone there for me, and I don’t understand why my parents were so eager to leave me by myself”
As far as why his parents were so quick to leave his graduation, FunnyAffectionate795 says, “They told me that they were just really excited and anxious when they got the call and rushed without thinking things through. They didn’t even inform my sister that they were coming.”
“On top of that, they told me that they stayed longer than what they said that they were planning on staying thinking it’ll make me feel better,” he added. “This just really upset me because I just wanted someone there for me, and I don’t understand why my parents were so eager to leave me by myself.”
“I even told them this, and they just apologized and told me that they would have stayed if they were in their right mind, but hearing the news of the baby clouded their judgment,” The OP revealed. “It’s really hard for me to accept their apology because them not being there for me still makes me sad, and I still remember how disappointed I was when I realized that they were gone.”
We also asked FunnyAffectionate795 if he managed to get some photos at graduation for himself. “I was able to get a few photos of myself and with some of my friends, but not many,” he noted. “All of the photos I have of myself are from before my graduation even started.”
But the graduate noted that he really wasn’t in the mood for taking photos after realizing his parents weren’t there. “However, my school took a couple of photos of everyone, including one of me smiling at the camera and one when I received my diploma,” he shared. “I did show them the photos I took of myself, but I was never going to send them to them. My parents want to be the ones to take the photo themselves and want a photo of all of us together.”
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual image)
“It felt nice seeing everyone congratulate me and tell me that they were proud of me”
Thankfully, the OP shared that he found the replies to his post very supportive and validating. “It was nice to hear that others understood my feelings and didn’t think I was wrong for being upset,” he told Bored Panda. “I did find the replies helpful.”
“I was having doubts at first because people were calling me [a jerk] and the messages I was receiving weren’t the nicest, but after a while, I tried to focus on the more respectful ones and found a lot of people who also didn’t have their parents at their graduation,” FunnyAffectionate795 continued. “I was given a lot of advice and encouragement from everyone, and it honestly made me feel less alone in the situation.”
Finally, the graduate added, “I realize I can’t change the past, and I know holding a grudge won’t get me anywhere, so I’m hoping that with time, I’ll be able to forgive my parents. It’s just comforting knowing that I’m not wrong for how I feel, if that makes sense.”
“I truly want to thank everyone for the kind messages and the nice replies. It really made me feel seen and heard because my parents weren’t even listening to me or considering how I felt at the time,” he shared. “It felt nice seeing everyone congratulate me and tell me that they were proud of me. It really helped, and I’m truly grateful for that.”
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk (not the actual image)
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Then, if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article discussing family drama at graduation, look no further than right here!
Many readers assured the teen that he had every right to feel frustrated
However, some thought that his sister’s labor should have taken priority in this situation
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What do you think ?
Hphizzle 1 year ago
If American, they are graduating 2 years early in the top 10 of their class. The least they could have done was have one parent stay. They worked so hard for this. Sis was not alone or in an emergency situation. I would have been brokenhearted if I were this kid. They chose not to be there, they don’t get a re-do.
Pumpkinpi 1 year ago
That’s what I was going to say! In the US students generally graduate at 18 so if they graduated at 16 they worked their butts off to get there.
Load More Replies...
CanadianDimes 1 year ago
The person who commented his sister had a medical emergency. 🙄 No, she didn’t. She was in labour. She knew it was going to happen for a while. She went to the hospital with her husband when she went into labour. That is not a medical emergency.
David 1 year ago
And even so, at least one of the parents could have gone to the graduation. Split it up
Load More Replies...
Nimitz 1 year ago
Poor kid obviously worked hard to graduate early and just wanted his hard work to be acknowledged. People should lay the hell off calling him yta... Dude worked hard and just wanted his family to care. It's okay for him to feel sad about it
SleepSycho 1 year ago
Agreed, and sounds like they wanted to be there for him. Too bad his sister went into labor right then. I think that takes precedence. It's ok to feel hurt but it's also okay have some awareness of what others are going thru. Maybe they could have split up and were just so freaked out they didn't think of it in the heat of the moment. If they were genuinely uncaring or had a favorite it is not expressed in his story.
Load More Replies...
KatSaidWhat 1 year ago
Spot the mothers who had traumatic births calling YTA. Death in childbirth is rare and even if it happened, the parents would not have been allowed in anyway. Meantime, they didn't even let him know they were leaving and then called him out for leaving without telling him? Their own child had a milestone that he worked hard for and was proud of and they opted out of spending 90 minutes celebrating it.
Bored something 1 year ago
So much this. They wouldn't have been with their daughter, and they didn't even end up staying until she gave birth. He said it was 18 hrs later. There was nothing stopping them from giving him 90min of time to celebrate his years of hard work before going to see her in hospital. My first took over 18 hrs, my mum called in every few hours to ask how I was doing and then came in an hour or so after I gave birth. Gave me a chance to wash up and all. Most hospitals only allow one person in with the mum, and when the dad is around it will be him. Why would his parents want to walk the hall outside rather than see their son graduate? Poor guy doesn't realise she's the golden one.
Load More Replies...
MR 1 year ago
NTA and those calling one are insane. The parents literally abandoned their kid at their graduation. And for what? Their daughter giving birth? Neither were in the room, neither would even be doing anything other than waiting in the waiting room. Even if it were a quick birth or a life threatening situation, they wouldn't be actively involved, just sitting and waiting. You know where they could do that waiting? Their other kid's graduation. Stay and watch this once in a life time event of your child. It won't be long, then you can go to the hospital and do your waiting. And as for the photos? Why should the kid pose for you? You could be bothered to stay for the special moment. You *both* had to abandon your child. Take the loss here.
Nizumi 1 year ago (edited)
When I graduated university, my parents came to the convocation (which I do not remember, tbh). My family name is near the end of the alphabet, so after a couple of hours, when I finally got my paper, I just went and sat in the lobby. My mum found me, reading and relaxing. I asked where Dad was, but I already knew the answer. "Your father's still in the hall. He said everyone has worked hard to get where they are today, and he will do them the respect of being there to the end of the ceremony." Bless you, Dad. So crusty on the outside, but such a softee on the inside. ♥
ConstantlyJon 1 year ago (edited)
Imagine being in an important event in your life, thinking your family is in the crowd watching you, and then finding out afterwards that they left and now you have to wait alone for them. My god, I cannot even imagine the emotions. It really doesn't matter to compare the graduation vs. birth. Both matter. Both are extremely important. Send one parent to the birth, the other stays at the graduation. Very simple solution. The idea that he's punishing them for their choices... well, yeah. That's exactly what he's doing. And that's kinda understandable. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. They chose her over him, so they don't get to go back on that decision. As a parent of teenagers, I understand they were worried about his safety walking home, but in that case they shouldn't have left him alone and put him in that situation in the first place. 100000% NTA.
Secret Squirrel 1 year ago
The parents knew this was important and still didn't discuss with their son what might happen if sister went into labor on the day. They knew this would impact their relationship with their son and just decided to bulk doze over what he wanted with no attempt to mitigate the hurt. If they were the type of parents to take their son's feelings into account, this wouldn't have happened. This sounds much more like the most recent example in a long pattern. I hope OP gets far away for college.
Bubs623 1 year ago
My husband missed our oldest son's high school graduatipn ceremony. Me, my mom and his youngest sister were there. My mom had flown in from Florida to California, in a weakened health condition because she felt it was that important. My husband took our middle son to a baseball playoff game. No, not the MLB. A little league game. To me, high school grad isn't a big deal because I just assumed all my kids would go to college. I didn't attend any of my ceremonies, from HS to second masters. BUT I knew it was huge for my son. He had struggled because of dyslexia and dysgraphia. He'd worked his butt off to graduate. I was furious; my son told his dad it was ok, that he didn't care. But truth is, my son did care a LOT. Twenty years later, it's still an issue. He didn't go straight to college, but did get his bachelor's in his late 20's. Dad wasn't invited.
Hphizzle 1 year ago
If American, they are graduating 2 years early in the top 10 of their class. The least they could have done was have one parent stay. They worked so hard for this. Sis was not alone or in an emergency situation. I would have been brokenhearted if I were this kid. They chose not to be there, they don’t get a re-do.
Pumpkinpi 1 year ago
That’s what I was going to say! In the US students generally graduate at 18 so if they graduated at 16 they worked their butts off to get there.
Load More Replies... CanadianDimes 1 year ago
The person who commented his sister had a medical emergency. 🙄 No, she didn’t. She was in labour. She knew it was going to happen for a while. She went to the hospital with her husband when she went into labour. That is not a medical emergency.
David 1 year ago
And even so, at least one of the parents could have gone to the graduation. Split it up
Load More Replies... Nimitz 1 year ago
Poor kid obviously worked hard to graduate early and just wanted his hard work to be acknowledged. People should lay the hell off calling him yta... Dude worked hard and just wanted his family to care. It's okay for him to feel sad about it
SleepSycho 1 year ago
Agreed, and sounds like they wanted to be there for him. Too bad his sister went into labor right then. I think that takes precedence. It's ok to feel hurt but it's also okay have some awareness of what others are going thru. Maybe they could have split up and were just so freaked out they didn't think of it in the heat of the moment. If they were genuinely uncaring or had a favorite it is not expressed in his story.
Load More Replies... KatSaidWhat 1 year ago
Spot the mothers who had traumatic births calling YTA. Death in childbirth is rare and even if it happened, the parents would not have been allowed in anyway. Meantime, they didn't even let him know they were leaving and then called him out for leaving without telling him? Their own child had a milestone that he worked hard for and was proud of and they opted out of spending 90 minutes celebrating it.
Bored something 1 year ago
So much this. They wouldn't have been with their daughter, and they didn't even end up staying until she gave birth. He said it was 18 hrs later. There was nothing stopping them from giving him 90min of time to celebrate his years of hard work before going to see her in hospital. My first took over 18 hrs, my mum called in every few hours to ask how I was doing and then came in an hour or so after I gave birth. Gave me a chance to wash up and all. Most hospitals only allow one person in with the mum, and when the dad is around it will be him. Why would his parents want to walk the hall outside rather than see their son graduate? Poor guy doesn't realise she's the golden one.
Load More Replies... MR 1 year ago
NTA and those calling one are insane. The parents literally abandoned their kid at their graduation. And for what? Their daughter giving birth? Neither were in the room, neither would even be doing anything other than waiting in the waiting room. Even if it were a quick birth or a life threatening situation, they wouldn't be actively involved, just sitting and waiting. You know where they could do that waiting? Their other kid's graduation. Stay and watch this once in a life time event of your child. It won't be long, then you can go to the hospital and do your waiting. And as for the photos? Why should the kid pose for you? You could be bothered to stay for the special moment. You *both* had to abandon your child. Take the loss here.
Nizumi 1 year ago (edited)
When I graduated university, my parents came to the convocation (which I do not remember, tbh). My family name is near the end of the alphabet, so after a couple of hours, when I finally got my paper, I just went and sat in the lobby. My mum found me, reading and relaxing. I asked where Dad was, but I already knew the answer. "Your father's still in the hall. He said everyone has worked hard to get where they are today, and he will do them the respect of being there to the end of the ceremony." Bless you, Dad. So crusty on the outside, but such a softee on the inside. ♥
ConstantlyJon 1 year ago (edited)
Imagine being in an important event in your life, thinking your family is in the crowd watching you, and then finding out afterwards that they left and now you have to wait alone for them. My god, I cannot even imagine the emotions. It really doesn't matter to compare the graduation vs. birth. Both matter. Both are extremely important. Send one parent to the birth, the other stays at the graduation. Very simple solution. The idea that he's punishing them for their choices... well, yeah. That's exactly what he's doing. And that's kinda understandable. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. They chose her over him, so they don't get to go back on that decision. As a parent of teenagers, I understand they were worried about his safety walking home, but in that case they shouldn't have left him alone and put him in that situation in the first place. 100000% NTA.
Secret Squirrel 1 year ago
The parents knew this was important and still didn't discuss with their son what might happen if sister went into labor on the day. They knew this would impact their relationship with their son and just decided to bulk doze over what he wanted with no attempt to mitigate the hurt. If they were the type of parents to take their son's feelings into account, this wouldn't have happened. This sounds much more like the most recent example in a long pattern. I hope OP gets far away for college.
Bubs623 1 year ago
My husband missed our oldest son's high school graduatipn ceremony. Me, my mom and his youngest sister were there. My mom had flown in from Florida to California, in a weakened health condition because she felt it was that important. My husband took our middle son to a baseball playoff game. No, not the MLB. A little league game. To me, high school grad isn't a big deal because I just assumed all my kids would go to college. I didn't attend any of my ceremonies, from HS to second masters. BUT I knew it was huge for my son. He had struggled because of dyslexia and dysgraphia. He'd worked his butt off to graduate. I was furious; my son told his dad it was ok, that he didn't care. But truth is, my son did care a LOT. Twenty years later, it's still an issue. He didn't go straight to college, but did get his bachelor's in his late 20's. Dad wasn't invited.
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