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Woman Feels BIL Is Ungrateful When She Wants To Name Baby After Him, He Asks Her To Say It Right
Woman Feels BIL Is Ungrateful When She Wants To Name Baby After Him, He Asks Her To Say It Right
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Woman Feels BIL Is Ungrateful When She Wants To Name Baby After Him, He Asks Her To Say It Right

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Naming your baby after someone in your life can be a significant way to honor your relationship. But it has to be done with respect, as without it, it’s nothing more than a mockery of a name. 

Just like in this story, where an American woman decided to name her baby after her Irish brother-in-law with a traditional name from his country. But the problem was that she didn’t know how to pronounce the name correctly and didn’t even try to learn it. Doesn’t sound very respectful, does it?

More info: Reddit

RELATED:

    Where is the line between cultural appreciation and cultural appropriation when naming a baby?

    Image credits: Alexander Grey (not the actual photo)

    An Irish man learned that his sister-in-law was planning to name her baby after him, even though she didn’t know how to say his name correctly

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    Image credits: Damien Perez (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: u/Responsible_Push_702

    When the man called her out on it, instead of correcting her behavior, she called him a jerk

    The OP is an Irish man married to an American woman. The couple lives in the woman’s country near her family. And apparently, they are all so close that the sister-in-law and her husband decided to name their upcoming kid after the author. 

    His name is Oisín. It is of Irish origin. It came from the Irish word oss, which meanslittle deer.”

    It also has an Irish folklore origin. Oisín was viewed as the greatest poet of Ireland, who was also the demigod son of the mythical hero Fionn Mac Cumhaill and his love Sadhbh

    According to BabyCenter data, in 2024, the name is in the 938th place for the most popular boy’s names. This means that around 180 in 1 million babies are named Oisín. 

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    Well, the OP’s sister-in-law wants her son to be one of these 180 babies. But there’s one problem. Neither she nor her husband can pronounce the name correctly. She keeps pronouncing it as Ocean or Osshian. The name is supposed to be pronouncedthis way or, as the OP spelled it out, “Ush-een.”

    The sister-in-law’s pronunciation has been corrected many times by both the man himself and his wife. In fact, it was said in the post that it was done far too many times to be ignored. Yet, the SIL still always brushes it off. 

    A name is animportantpart of a person’s identity. It carries personal and cultural connections and meanings. Bored Panda got in touch with an expert teacher of the Lithuanian language,Loreta, who agreed that it’s important to learn how to pronounce names from other cultures. “It not only helps to ensure proper interpersonal communication, but [it] also shows respect for other cultures.” 

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    In her opinion, intentional mispronunciation is a sign of disrespect not only to the person themselves but to their culture, too. She thinks that we all should strive to be respectful to others, no matter how different they might be. 

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    Image credits: katemangostar (not the actual photo)

    The purposeful mispronunciation communicates that the person isn’t viewed as valued as much as others. It can even be a sign ofothering(or discrimination), especially when the botched pronunciation is of a name from a different ethnicity. 

    Loreta said she always strives to improve her pronunciation when needed. “If I kept mispronouncing the student’s name, it could potentially hurt their self-esteem and affect their results in the long run.”

    All of this only proves how ignorant it was for the sister-in-law to want a baby name she doesn’t even bother to pronounce right. Many family members understood what a poor idea it was. For instance, the parents tried to convince the couple to choose a more common name as the first one and put Oisín as the middle one. But apparently, it didn’t work. 

    While everyone was bewildered by the baby’s name choice, the couple themselves were stumped about another thing. They thought that the brother-in-law would be more thrilled to have someone named after him when we know how he ended up actually feeling

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    He told the sister-in-law that she should learn the right pronunciation before giving the name to her kid. This insulted the woman, and she called her sister’s husband a jerk. But this didn’t phase him. And he told her that calling him a jerk doesn’t mean he is not right in this scenario. 

    Understandably, people on Reddit agreed. Some even pointed out that SIL’s actions sound like cultural appropriation. This is when people of a majority group adopt a minority’s cultural elements disrespectfully. Like giving a non-Irish kid an Irish name without knowing how to pronounce it. And thenmaking it all worse by acting out when called out on it. Sounds almost like a textbook example of cultural appropriation, doesn’t it?

    Well, we can only hope that someone in her life will educate the woman about this kind of stuff andshe’ll realize how poorly she acted and what a poor decision she made for her baby.

    People online assured the man that he wasn’t a jerk here and dubbed the sister-in-law’s actions as cultural appropriation

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    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Ugnė Bulotaitė

    Ugnė Bulotaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. I have loved creating and writing down stories about people and things since I was little and I think this passion led me to get degrees in sociology, communication, and journalism. These degrees opened various paths for me, and I got a chance to be a volunteer in the human rights field, and also try myself out in social research and journalism areas. Besides writing, my passions include pop culture: music, movies, TV shows; literature, and board games. In fact, I have been dubbed a board games devotee by some people in my life.

    Read less »
    Ugnė Bulotaitė

    Ugnė Bulotaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. I have loved creating and writing down stories about people and things since I was little and I think this passion led me to get degrees in sociology, communication, and journalism. These degrees opened various paths for me, and I got a chance to be a volunteer in the human rights field, and also try myself out in social research and journalism areas. Besides writing, my passions include pop culture: music, movies, TV shows; literature, and board games. In fact, I have been dubbed a board games devotee by some people in my life.

    What do you think ?
    Yu Pan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trying too hard to be "special" it's pathetic and sad.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially when it is though your kids.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Whaddya mean you're naming the kid after me? My name isn't "Ocean"."

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    Michelle C
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am the ticked off Irish-American who has always taken pride in my cultural heritage and strive to learn what I don’t already know well. “Oisín” is not that difficult to learn to pronounce correctly, for crying out loud!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. Maybe you're not familiar with them, but you CAN learn. She just wouldn't.

    Load More Replies...
    Jan Dunn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do I get the feeling she's doing this so her sister can't name their child after his dad.. I would be having a fit about the fact that she's naming it after her brother-in-law at all. Not how she pronounces it.

    Bec
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would recommend against names with non-standard characters in them. I had to do a big work around because a student's name had a tilda in it and when one computer program would try to communicate with another one, the second one kept crashing because it couldn't process the tilda

    Scotira
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed. My very normal Swiss name has a very normal German "Umlaut" (ä,ö,ü) in it and the American program we use crashed every time I typed my (auto-generated) username in it. Just annoying. The workaround is to type it out 🙄 however this is not my name and generates other problems fe with airlines and customs as it now no longer is in accord with my legal documents 🤦🏻‍♀️

    Load More Replies...
    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But she's NOT naming the kid after OP, she's just taking his name. So it's doubly weird to demand someone be more appreciative.

    R Dennis
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My BIL is from Egypt and has a relatively easy name to pronounce. There is an "a" in it like "an" and I cannot tell you how many people pronounce it like "on" even after numerous corrections. I finally snapped at a couple of my family members who kept saying it wrong. I told them they were being incredibly disrespectful to not even bother trying to pronounce his name right. I then said his name four times, slower each time. Yes, I did it in front of my BIL and others. They finally started saying it right. (No, my family isn't racist. Just a bit lazy.)

    Livingwithcfs
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh my, names are pronounced differently by each person. My mother and I have the same name and because of the slight difference in how people say it we kniw exactly who they are talking too. And there is the spelling thing taking a name and spelling it every way except the standard. Names are very personal. Snl needs to learn how to pronounce Ops name properly but she can use what ever pronunciation she wants for her sun and that will be the child's name

    notlikeyou1971
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's supposed to be such a big honor and he's supposed to be so grateful, LEARN HOW TO PRONOUNCE AND SAY THE NAME!!! Otherwise, they need to get over themselves.lol

    Joanne Mendonza-Earle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As one who had a maiden name that no one EVER pronounced right, even after I corrected them, I fully support this guy. Everyone would forget there was a second N in my last name and say the more common 'Mendoza'. As a result, I've made it my life's objective to make sure I remember how to pronounce people's names b/c of the c**p I've put up with my whole life. To the point where I would get angry and snap, 'I LITERALLY JUST TOLD YOU HOW TO SAY IT!' I had a simple last name from my first marriage and intended to keep it after the divorce but my now husband had asked me to go back to my maiden name, the one he knew me by (and the only person that actually spelled it right when he looked me up on FB b/f we got together). So I went back to it and any time we were together and it was pronounced wrong, I'd look at him and joke, 'I blame you for this'. lol

    Load More Comments
    Yu Pan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trying too hard to be "special" it's pathetic and sad.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially when it is though your kids.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Whaddya mean you're naming the kid after me? My name isn't "Ocean"."

    ADVERTISEMENT
    Michelle C
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am the ticked off Irish-American who has always taken pride in my cultural heritage and strive to learn what I don’t already know well. “Oisín” is not that difficult to learn to pronounce correctly, for crying out loud!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. Maybe you're not familiar with them, but you CAN learn. She just wouldn't.

    Load More Replies...
    Jan Dunn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do I get the feeling she's doing this so her sister can't name their child after his dad.. I would be having a fit about the fact that she's naming it after her brother-in-law at all. Not how she pronounces it.

    Bec
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would recommend against names with non-standard characters in them. I had to do a big work around because a student's name had a tilda in it and when one computer program would try to communicate with another one, the second one kept crashing because it couldn't process the tilda

    Scotira
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed. My very normal Swiss name has a very normal German "Umlaut" (ä,ö,ü) in it and the American program we use crashed every time I typed my (auto-generated) username in it. Just annoying. The workaround is to type it out 🙄 however this is not my name and generates other problems fe with airlines and customs as it now no longer is in accord with my legal documents 🤦🏻‍♀️

    Load More Replies...
    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But she's NOT naming the kid after OP, she's just taking his name. So it's doubly weird to demand someone be more appreciative.

    R Dennis
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My BIL is from Egypt and has a relatively easy name to pronounce. There is an "a" in it like "an" and I cannot tell you how many people pronounce it like "on" even after numerous corrections. I finally snapped at a couple of my family members who kept saying it wrong. I told them they were being incredibly disrespectful to not even bother trying to pronounce his name right. I then said his name four times, slower each time. Yes, I did it in front of my BIL and others. They finally started saying it right. (No, my family isn't racist. Just a bit lazy.)

    Livingwithcfs
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh my, names are pronounced differently by each person. My mother and I have the same name and because of the slight difference in how people say it we kniw exactly who they are talking too. And there is the spelling thing taking a name and spelling it every way except the standard. Names are very personal. Snl needs to learn how to pronounce Ops name properly but she can use what ever pronunciation she wants for her sun and that will be the child's name

    notlikeyou1971
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's supposed to be such a big honor and he's supposed to be so grateful, LEARN HOW TO PRONOUNCE AND SAY THE NAME!!! Otherwise, they need to get over themselves.lol

    Joanne Mendonza-Earle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As one who had a maiden name that no one EVER pronounced right, even after I corrected them, I fully support this guy. Everyone would forget there was a second N in my last name and say the more common 'Mendoza'. As a result, I've made it my life's objective to make sure I remember how to pronounce people's names b/c of the c**p I've put up with my whole life. To the point where I would get angry and snap, 'I LITERALLY JUST TOLD YOU HOW TO SAY IT!' I had a simple last name from my first marriage and intended to keep it after the divorce but my now husband had asked me to go back to my maiden name, the one he knew me by (and the only person that actually spelled it right when he looked me up on FB b/f we got together). So I went back to it and any time we were together and it was pronounced wrong, I'd look at him and joke, 'I blame you for this'. lol

    Load More Comments
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