“Grass Is Not Greener”: 30 People Who Divorced And Then Remarried Their Ex Share What Happened
Despite the fact that it’s basically a coin toss to guess if a marriage will end in divorce, most people simply prefer not to think about it, even after it’s happened. What’s done is done, or so the saying goes. Except, every once in a while, some folks might try and give marriage a second shot.
Someone asked netizens who “remarried your ex-husband/wife, how did it happen and why?” and people shared their best stories. So get comfortable as you read through, upvote your favorites, and be sure to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section below.
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My great aunt and uncle were married for several years, but it turned out my uncle had a huge drinking and gambling problem. They got divorced for 20 years. During that time he cleaned up his act, and they got back together when they were in their 50s. They are in their 80s now and still going strong
My wife and I were married 17 years, and somewhere around age 40 both of us began to question our future together. We had tried separation in the past, it never worked. So I filed for divorce and we went our separate ways. No children involved. Several things came as a utter shock to me even though I thought I was mentally prepared for divorce. First, dating. It is absolutely nothing like I remembered, and finding some woman who isn't just into FWB and/or is looking for someone to support her and her kids is harder to find than you might think, especially at 40. I realize I'm in the minority but friends with benefits does not interest me, and is in fact quite the turn off in my opinion. Secondly, our two families divorced with us. Everyone used to talk and get together, and even planned to do so after we dropped the d bomb on everyone. It just didn't work out that way for us. Bitter relationships formed. Also, many people assumed one of us cheated, or some other big secret revealed, that just wasn't the case. Fast forward three years and after no contact with my ex whatsoever, I get a call from her about our pet we shared (that she got in the divorce) was dying. I go to see her and we end up talking quite a bit. We soon realized that the grass is not greener on the other side, and we were seeking something that was right in front of us all along. We took it very slowly and proceeded with caution, meeting again over the next few months. We are happier now than ever. There are still scars, but for the most part, it has worked out. We communicate better now and have set new goals for our future.
My parents. (Step)Mom and Dad married at a young age. 18 & 16. I guess that was okay back in the day. Had 2 kids, divorced. Dad had another child, then married my biological mother and had me. Mother died of cancer. Was just my dad and I for a few years. My oldest (half) sister was having her first child...so we visited. Obviously her mother was there as well. My dad and her rekindle their relationship. After a few years, she officially adopts me. That was 20 years ago and they are still going strong. I’ve known her over 2/3 of my life and she’s as good as a mother that anyone could have.
My parents are currently doing this. Married for 7 years in the 90’s, divorced for 20 years, and now getting married again as old people. All the things they used to fight about (money, bad jobs, raising kids) don’t exist anymore. Life is weird.
Call me old fashioned, but I kinda think marriage is about sticking it out through those things. Hope there's more to it than that.
I live with my ex husband but we’re not together but it’s made raising kids so much more fun and we’ve become good friends. On the same property. He has a trailer. I own a home.
My ridiculous coworker divorced her husband because he said something like “you can’t live without me.” She divorced him to prove a point, but then remarried him so I guess he really proved his point.
My parents were married for 3 yrs and then divorced, were divorced for 4 yrs and then got back together. They have now been married for 45 yrs. Now here is where it gets weird. My brother and his wife were married for 9 yrs, divorced, then got remarried 2 yrs later. Then his daughter, my niece, got married and divorced within 2 yrs, then remarried 2 yrs later. I call this the 'Christensen Curse'. I always thought this was crazy and then just found out last year that my Mom's parents had done this as well! I have been happily married for 21 yrs and my husband and I laugh about this and say if we ever divorced it is for keeps!
My parents divorced about 8-ish years ago and are basically back together now. It was a rather sudden transition honestly. Went from them having a drink one day to dinner once a month. Then that transitioned into mom having dinner at dads house and now we have dinner together every Friday. Still live in separate houses but I think that too may change soon.
My grandpa married my grandma. Then he divorced her and married another woman. Than he divorced that woman and remarried my grandma. Then he divorced my grandma and remarried the second woman again
My mom got married right out of high school, had my three oldest siblings. They divorced and she had me and married my dad. Then they divorced when I was in high school and she remarried her first husband after like 17ish years of being apart. It’s been about 8 years now, they argue like they’re still teenagers, but they’re happy. Plus he’s always been a part of my life because of my siblings, so it’s better than some rando
Ok so my mum and dad married at 18 fell pregnant straight away. Mum was heavily pregnant, dad came home with Hickies. Mum divorces him. Never knew him growing up. At 19 I decided to look for him , found him forged a relationship, mum and dad re met . Fell back in love , got married, been 19 years
My parents divorced for 3 years and then remarried after they were both around for a while during my recovery from a surgery at about 11. My mother once told me that it was a lot cheaper than therapy. They were together for about another 20 years till she passed away.
My parents were married for 7 years, then got divorced when I was 5. They fought all the time so when they announced to me that they were getting remarried when I was 11 I was terrified. They were then married for 2 years and had another child together during that time and then proceeded to get divorced again. I recently found out the marriage happened only out of guilt and not real love. All throughout growing up I heard each of their sides of the story until finally I told both of them to never talk to me about each other again. After years of carrying that anger and resentment, I decided I wasn’t going to make the same mistake my parents did and I will only marry someone if I truly love them. My sister went the opposite route and refuses to marry because it doesn’t mean anything to her.
Inner vows. Generational trauma. These decisions are so much bigger than just two people.
My stepdad’s parents divorced when he and his brothers were in their teens. They always stayed friendly, spent a lot of time together willingly. A couple years ago, they decided to remarry.
Plot twist: When they’d filed for divorce, something went wrong with the paperwork. I’m not sure if they failed to complete everything, or if someone at the office misplaced things, or what. But they were never actually, legally divorced.
This would be my parents. They divorced when I was 12 and got back together when I was 14. 10 years later they are still together and they act like nothing never happened. In fact, I'm still not really quite sure what the hell that was all about.
Not me but my parents. They married and had me at a young age, they were very different people in every way, nothing in common. My mom had depression issues. They divorced for a brief period when I was really young but I don't ever recall knowing they were actually divorced. I never prodded why but my understanding was it just difficult so they split but realized pretty quickly they wanted to work it out. They got back together although they didn't officially remarry for years. I was 8 and they said We're getting remarried! and that was the first time I found out they were actually divorced lol. Been together 36 years now
My husband and I married at 24. At 25, I was diagnosed with metastatic melanoma. We had no idea what we were doing. I felt like he didn’t take care of me. We grew apart. Divorced.
15 years later. This is the cool part. We reconnected via FB 10 years ago. I always kept his last name. I was diagnosed with cancer again in 2014, he would always be there. In September 2015, I sent him a text that said. “I love you. I want to be with you forever. Please come home.” He quit his career and was there that weekend. We got married that Christmas. My health is great. What a life! I love him so much.
I am not married to her, we are half a continent from each other. We have been dfivorced almost exactly 10 years. The other day we emailed each other at the same exact time (we have a special time of day having to do with our first date) to wish each other what would have been our 19th anniversary.
I have kids now, something she never wanted and was honest from the beginning. I have full custody of my three girls. That's just too much for her.
If I didn't have kids we would be married again, without a doubt. There isn't a day I don't miss her and want her. She feels the same but just can't do the kid thing. I was recently diagnosed with what I thought for a few weeks was a terminal illness (it's not, it just sucks) and we came close again.
God damn I miss her.
It breaks my heart.
Not me, but my in-laws. As far as I understand it, they divorced when my spouse was a pre-teen. MIL remarried. They stayed on good terms for the most part.
Then MIL got divorced and eventually fell on hard times, so FIL let her move in and she...never left. They got remarried a few years ago, mostly out of convenience and for financial/health insurance purposes I think, but they seem content.
My mom did this! Twice! She married my father and got pregnant with me immediately. She was just 20 years old. I was born, he was a turd. She divorced him and figure out a few weeks later that she was pregnant with my brother. They both decided to do “the right thing” and get married and try to make things work so that my brother and I could be raised by their parents. Surprise! Dad is still a turd. He kept my brother, my mom kept me. I didn’t see my brother for two or three full years. Literally forgot about the guy because we were so young.
My mom met my stepdad when I was 4. They got married. My mom cheated on him when I was 9 or so? Then she found out he was cheating on her too. Weird times. He wanted to work things out. She wanted to be with her boyfriend (he made more money). What followed was a three year stint of my mom hooking up with rich guys, then hating them and moving us into weird trailer parks overnight.
Eventually she got back around to my step dad. They remarried and have been together ever since. I think they’ve been married a solid 15 years now. They really do seem to love each other. I think they just had too much baggage to make it work the first time. They split up, skanked around, and realized they just wanted to be with each other. They’re really both happy together now!
I don’t like either one of them, but I think they did the right thing by getting remarried. Moral of the story: if you’re getting remarried to the same person for the right reasons, it just might work out.
I got married to my husband when I was 24. We were happily married for 5 years and had a child together.
One day, I got a text message from some random a*****e telling me that my husband was having an affair. (He actually wasn't, but that's irrelevant) Combining that string of texts with the fact that I had a significant crush on a coworker and a belief that I could have a "deeper relationship" .... and divorce ensued.
We both dated/slept around. I had a boyfriend for over a year that I was pretty serious with. But nobody I dated lived up to my expectations. Sure they were nice, intelligent, successful, whatever, but they weren't him. He'd set the bar too high. He was the man who loved me completely and would do anything for me. Literally, anything.
Example:
"Husband, will you bring me home some tweezers after work? I've lost the 9 million tweezers I have at the house"
"Of course I will baby, and I'll find 3 pairs in 5 minutes when I get home because you struggle."
.... And then he brings me home a new pair and does proceed to find me 3 pairs of my lost tweezers too, with all smiles and jokes.
I finally realized that everything I wanted was right in front of me. It took a long time, I was stubborn, prideful, and we had both built a lot of walls. But three years later, we started dating again.
We've now been back together for over a year, and I've never been happier. I've never been more grateful. More proud. More loving and loyal. I thank God (even though I don't believe in a God) every day that I get with him now. Time seems shorter now.
And while we aren't technically "remarried" yet, we will be eventually, but for tax purposes, we haven't gotten remarried yet.
TLDR: My husband and I were both immature a******s, and we divorced for stupid reasons. A few years, and a lot of random sex and tinder dates later, we realized what we needed and wanted was right in front of our faces.
My grandparents got remarried after 25 years. They had my mom when they were only 16, got divorced a few years later. Grandma remarried 3 other people, then they end up back together. I think they just wanted company and settled tbh. They aren’t loving towards each other at all.
My mom and dad got married right out of high school and had my brother. They divorced because my dad couldn't keep it in his pants. Somehow he talked my mom into getting remarried and they had my other brother then me. They divorced again when I was two. A few years later my dad almost talked my Mom into getting married AGAIN but she found out his girlfriend was pregnant with my sister. So she told him to finally do the right thing and make a family with his gf.
My parents did that.
Bitter divorce, drawn out custody battle... Nightmares all around. Almost 30 years later, they got remarried and stayed that way until my mom passed away. They were married in 1964 when my mom was 16 and my dad was 21.
They came from completely different backgrounds (Mom was Native, grew up very poor in a rural area with alcoholic parents; dad was a spoiled Mama's boy, but had a strict German father, and both my grandparents really disliked my mom for years and years) and still loved each other enough to try again regardless of the hell they'd put each other through during the divorce.
My dad and former stepdad became friends, and they hang out every night just working on cars and playing cards. So weird.
Eh, not that weird. I get along much better with my ex husband's wife (our son's stepmom) much better than I ever got along with him. We harbored no ill will, he didn't meet her til long after I gave up caring about him.
My parents got divorced when i was 14. My mother is toxic, cheated on him for years and lied about who my genetic father is.
My dad, lovely guy but man, i dont know why he keeps going back. Without fail every time my Dad is single, he goes back to her. I know they stay in contact too.
Its f****d up! He will defend her to the ends of the earth, and he's a worse person when hes with her. Ive cut her out and im Low contact with him.
My grandparents were married, had my mom, then he got sent to jail, so she divorced him and got married to my other grandpa (N for ease of sorry telling)
My blood grandpa (R), got out of jail and became a bit of a nomad, gambling and fighting his way South. Got into some bad moonshine at a card game and almost died. He woke up with little-to-no memory of his previous life, and was told he had a wife up north. So he came back to Michigan to try to find her.
Meanwhile, Grandma and Grandpa N had 4 more kids, but they were unhappy, and would often separate or skip town, leaving my mom and siblings with N or with her mom.
When Grandpa R showed up Grandma remarried him, and left mom with Grandpa N.
About 20 years later I was born and my mom rekindled her relationship with Grandma and basically met Grandpa R. I got to grow up with three grandpas, sadly all three have now passed. Out of the three, Grandpa R was the most loving and was a good role model for me growing up.
My parents got divorced when I was a kid, after my dad went to jail. Then they remarried a couple years later, I think mainly for financial/health insurance reasons ... then spent another couple decades making each other miserable, with occasional short separations.
Now they're getting legally separated or possibly divorced again and my dad just moved out. It's fairly amicable this time, and they get along *so* much better when they don't live together, so I'm happy with this last development.
My parents divorced when I was like 4, and my mom remarried. They divorced when I was 12. When I was about 20 my parents got remarried to each other, for practical purposes which I don't entirely understand, but it has to do with my dad's really good free healthcare and my mom didn't have any, but mostly because my brother is disabled and if one of them died it would be easier for my brother to be taken care of if they had been married. I'm not sure of the details and I didnt approve of the marriage.
It was only supposed to be on paper but somehow 15 years later they live together and have separate bedrooms and snipe at each other all the time. I guess I'm glad that they're taking care of each other, and they're not romantically involved but they both seem fine with the situation and it works, financially.
They're both retired and just hang out watching TV in different rooms lol
My mom finally divorced my dad when three of the four of us had moved out, and my youngest sibling, in high school at the time, was mature enough (in my mom's correct estimation) to handle the split. She reconnected with a childhood friend, fell in love, and married him. Turns out he was off the deep end, emotionally abused her for years, then [offed] himself. My dad had always wanted my mom back, and they basically remarried for necessary financial and health care reasons. Neither are happy with it, but at least they're familiar with each other.
My friend’s parents: Getting drunk at a party led to one-night stand. Resulting pregnancy led to marriage. Had second kid a year later, but divorced a couple years after that as they really detested each other.
Mom took the kids and moved far from Dad—back to her home country—met new guy, and married him. Many years passed, and Mom became more and more religious. She felt guilty that she was “living in sin” with second husband as her church (Catholic) taught that she was still married to first husband in “the eyes of God”. She told her husband that she needed to divorce him and return to her “real husband”.
She returned to her ex-husband, said, “In the eyes of God, we’re still married, so the kids and I are moving back in.” He had missed the kids, so he agreed. They had separate bedrooms, and lived separate lives. They only shared the house and the children. After the children were grown and moved away, they finally legally remarried (only for legal and financial reasons in retirement) but then lived in different countries from each other as retirees.
**TL;DR:** Church told them were still married, so they lived together while detesting each other.
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Since there was no remarriage, it's not exactly on topic, but my law professor had this to tell: when he was still an attorney, he was representing on of the sides of a messy divorce, and I mean messy - there was a fight over every penny, scandal after scandal, judge visibly hated them, but eventually they settled. Fast forward couple of years, they come to professors' office and ask to help arrange something that comes automatically with spouses, inheritance, IIRC. It would appear they came together almost straight after the verdict and lived happily ever after they were annoyed not with each other, but rather with the very fact of being married.
I live in a former socialist country. During the socialis era, most apartments were the poperty of the state (city). It was hard to get an apartment, and a family was allowed to have one. Therefore, sometimes a heritage led to divorce. My parents almost got divorced, when my father inherited a privately owned small studio from his aunt. The place was definitely too small to live there with a family, and they were afraid to lose the city-owned 2-bedroom apartment that was the home of our 3-generational family (we lived with my grandma). A well-known musician was also forced to get divorced from his beloved wife due to some heritage. They never got separated, but legally divorced and later remarried.
Since there was no remarriage, it's not exactly on topic, but my law professor had this to tell: when he was still an attorney, he was representing on of the sides of a messy divorce, and I mean messy - there was a fight over every penny, scandal after scandal, judge visibly hated them, but eventually they settled. Fast forward couple of years, they come to professors' office and ask to help arrange something that comes automatically with spouses, inheritance, IIRC. It would appear they came together almost straight after the verdict and lived happily ever after they were annoyed not with each other, but rather with the very fact of being married.
I live in a former socialist country. During the socialis era, most apartments were the poperty of the state (city). It was hard to get an apartment, and a family was allowed to have one. Therefore, sometimes a heritage led to divorce. My parents almost got divorced, when my father inherited a privately owned small studio from his aunt. The place was definitely too small to live there with a family, and they were afraid to lose the city-owned 2-bedroom apartment that was the home of our 3-generational family (we lived with my grandma). A well-known musician was also forced to get divorced from his beloved wife due to some heritage. They never got separated, but legally divorced and later remarried.
