“I Wish Her The Best”: Man Gets Accused Of Violence, Learns His GF’s True Colors The Hard Way
Blame-shifting, unreasonable jealousy, and drama-baiting are among the long list of toxic relationship traits that people typically experience. They may be tolerable for some and an instant dealbreaker for others.
A man ticked all three boxes with his girlfriend, who seemingly had a massive problem with him going on a night out with friends. It initially ended with him sleeping on the couch, but the situation quickly escalated to a point where he could potentially face criminal charges.
The author attests that he did nothing wrong and took to the AITAH Reddit community to seek answers.
Some people end up in toxic relationships
Image credits: gpointstudio (not the actual photo)
A man had to deal with the unreasonable behavior of his girlfriend, who seemingly had a massive issue with him going on a night out
Image credits: jet-po (not the actual photo)
The couple had a blowout fight where the woman got physical and stormed out
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
However, she tried to play the victim by accusing him of hitting her
Image credits: [deleted]
Women who desire to control their partners are likely to use physical aggression
As the author recounted in his story, it was his girlfriend who escalated their argument by using aggression and throwing the pillow at him. According to the University of Cumbria professor Dr. Elizabeth Bates, women will likely get physical to appease their desire to control their romantic partners.
A study published in the National Library of Medicine supported Dr. Bates’ statement, revealing that women “were significantly more likely” to have used intimate partner violence (IPV) more frequently.
The study found four primary motivations for women to engage in IPV: self-defense, anger, desiring attention, and coercive control.
The girlfriend also tried to play the victim and shift the blame onto the author, alleging he “hit her in a drunken rage.” According to author and mental health researcher Arlin Cuncic, MA, a person may embody the victim mentality because of “multiple negative situations” where they have no sense of control.
The author was clearly in a toxic relationship, and his two friends immediately sensed it and urged him to break up. Fortunately, he took their advice.
However, he must address the lies she spread about him, particularly regarding the physical a*****t allegation. In most places, it is a criminal charge and could land him in deep trouble if the woman escalated it further.
In these cases, experts like psychotherapist Dr. Marni Feuerman, LCSW, LMFT, advise speaking to someone about it.
“If you feel threatened, inform the local authorities that you are going to need help,” Dr. Feuerman wrote in an article for Very Well Mind.
Most people sided with the author, with some advising him to “save himself legally”
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Share on FacebookI keep wondering how crazy people like these even get partners to begin with
They hide it till they are sure they can get away with it
Load More Replies...I don’t try to throw people out that I’m afraid of. I leave quietly so they don’t hurt me. Live to fight another day.
Nah preemptive strikes is the key - cut their brakes.
Load More Replies...All it takes is an accusation to ruin someone's life these days and I hate women who use that and make false accusations.
STAY AS FAR AWAY FROM THESE TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE THEY WILL MAKE YOU START TO ACT CRAZY & THEN YOU WILL END UP JUST AS IRRATIC & IRRATIONAL AS THE OTHER PARTY.
My lovely husbands ex gf used to attack him after too much wine. When we married she used to ring at stupido’clock in the night/early morning, totally off her face drunk. We had to change our phone number and went ex directory . She then switched to the office phone. She turned up at our house one day and called him a fool for getting married to me and asked him to take her out for a drink! When he declined she said “ You don’t know what you are missing” lifted her skirt up to display no underwear! He panicked and shut the door in her face!! Not seen her since, but I am ready for her.
If it's in the US, drinking age is 21, so legally an adult, cannot legally drink.
Load More Replies...I find it a little hard to believe there weren't red flags before this. Not saying the guy deserved it or anything, obviously, but a little weird this all came out of the blue.
It didn't. The other moments of crazy just didn't hit the interwebs. I'm sure OP could write a book.
Load More Replies...Don’t date u derange girls. Don’t date girls that live on their phones. And don’t assume when you don’t get a reply stuffs ok. She prob was texting her friends and stalking online all night for anything about who or where or what you were up to. Also do change the locks to be safe. And get a security camera for inside the house too. So if accusations of you hitting her come up or anyone in the future you will have proof.
I agree with your premise, but "don't date underage girls" is not necessarily practical advice unless you live somewhere where underage is less than 16. If you're referring to "underage" as being drinking age, well that's a bit silly too if you're in the U.S. because there you can't drink until you're 21 for heaven's sake. Ludicrous! Under the age of majority (voting age) I agree with. But the woman is a full adult and able to make her own decisions, so she's not "underage". She's not a minor.
Load More Replies...Why do I get the feeling the real circumstances are nothing like OP described? Anyway, if it is as described, ESH. You for making plans that excluded your girlfriend - you couldn’t go to a coffee shop instead? And the girlfriend for being a nut and overreacting.
Either your critical thinking skills are lacking, or you hate men inside with women in any conflict. Did you read the same article that the rest of us did? The girlfriend joined this short and minor hangout between friends after the fact. It was not planned, has stated by OP. To say that two male friends cannot hang out for a couple of drinks, and others join them after that without being an a-hole, well to be honest it makes you look similar to the soon to be ex-gf here.
Load More Replies...You are a man. Men have always had gone with their buddys forgetting their wifes/gfs. So, you are guilty. End of the story.
I fail to see how the guy is in any way shape or form immature here. He handled it as well as any.
Load More Replies...She is underage. I'm more interested what guy decides to meet with a buddy on his girlfriend's birthday. And then awkwardly brings her along.
Load More Replies...her birthday plans got cancelled, she called bf and she joined them. But agree with you she may have issues with infidelity from the past.
Load More Replies...I keep wondering how crazy people like these even get partners to begin with
They hide it till they are sure they can get away with it
Load More Replies...I don’t try to throw people out that I’m afraid of. I leave quietly so they don’t hurt me. Live to fight another day.
Nah preemptive strikes is the key - cut their brakes.
Load More Replies...All it takes is an accusation to ruin someone's life these days and I hate women who use that and make false accusations.
STAY AS FAR AWAY FROM THESE TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE THEY WILL MAKE YOU START TO ACT CRAZY & THEN YOU WILL END UP JUST AS IRRATIC & IRRATIONAL AS THE OTHER PARTY.
My lovely husbands ex gf used to attack him after too much wine. When we married she used to ring at stupido’clock in the night/early morning, totally off her face drunk. We had to change our phone number and went ex directory . She then switched to the office phone. She turned up at our house one day and called him a fool for getting married to me and asked him to take her out for a drink! When he declined she said “ You don’t know what you are missing” lifted her skirt up to display no underwear! He panicked and shut the door in her face!! Not seen her since, but I am ready for her.
If it's in the US, drinking age is 21, so legally an adult, cannot legally drink.
Load More Replies...I find it a little hard to believe there weren't red flags before this. Not saying the guy deserved it or anything, obviously, but a little weird this all came out of the blue.
It didn't. The other moments of crazy just didn't hit the interwebs. I'm sure OP could write a book.
Load More Replies...Don’t date u derange girls. Don’t date girls that live on their phones. And don’t assume when you don’t get a reply stuffs ok. She prob was texting her friends and stalking online all night for anything about who or where or what you were up to. Also do change the locks to be safe. And get a security camera for inside the house too. So if accusations of you hitting her come up or anyone in the future you will have proof.
I agree with your premise, but "don't date underage girls" is not necessarily practical advice unless you live somewhere where underage is less than 16. If you're referring to "underage" as being drinking age, well that's a bit silly too if you're in the U.S. because there you can't drink until you're 21 for heaven's sake. Ludicrous! Under the age of majority (voting age) I agree with. But the woman is a full adult and able to make her own decisions, so she's not "underage". She's not a minor.
Load More Replies...Why do I get the feeling the real circumstances are nothing like OP described? Anyway, if it is as described, ESH. You for making plans that excluded your girlfriend - you couldn’t go to a coffee shop instead? And the girlfriend for being a nut and overreacting.
Either your critical thinking skills are lacking, or you hate men inside with women in any conflict. Did you read the same article that the rest of us did? The girlfriend joined this short and minor hangout between friends after the fact. It was not planned, has stated by OP. To say that two male friends cannot hang out for a couple of drinks, and others join them after that without being an a-hole, well to be honest it makes you look similar to the soon to be ex-gf here.
Load More Replies...You are a man. Men have always had gone with their buddys forgetting their wifes/gfs. So, you are guilty. End of the story.
I fail to see how the guy is in any way shape or form immature here. He handled it as well as any.
Load More Replies...She is underage. I'm more interested what guy decides to meet with a buddy on his girlfriend's birthday. And then awkwardly brings her along.
Load More Replies...her birthday plans got cancelled, she called bf and she joined them. But agree with you she may have issues with infidelity from the past.
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