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Sis Can’t Bear That Bro Escaped Poverty And Pays For Fiancée’s College, Demands Pays For Her Too
Interview With ExpertWhen you love someone, it’s obvious that you feel like doing everything possible for them. However, when people come demanding that you do something for them, it’s only natural to feel that you don’t want to, especially when they are your family’s entitled moochers.
Even Reddit user Extra-Artist3016 didn’t want to pay for his entitled sister’s college tuition when she demanded it, just because he did it for his fiancée. His family didn’t take it well, causing unwanted drama when he refused and even bringing out the big “family card”!
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
It’s natural to not want to do things for family when they demand it out of a sense of entitlement
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster went from rags to riches by working hard for ages, which resulted in him doing quite well today and recently even winning $20,000
Image credits: Extra-Artist3016
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
He offered to pay for his fiancée’s college tuition as she’s juggling school with work, but when his sister found out, she came demanding the same
Image credits: Extra-Artist3016
Image credits: Alena Darmel / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Apparently, she is bitter toward him as he got out of poverty and is doing well while the family is struggling, but he refused to pay for her
Image credits: Extra-Artist3016
His parents also tried to guilt trip him even when he had helped them financially in the past, but now he doesn’t want to be the family ATM
Today, we dive into the life of the original poster (OP) who grew up dirt poor but went from rags to riches by working his back off. After all the struggle, he is currently doing quite well and recently even won $20,000 on Stake, where he had gambled on the NBA.
He is also well aware that his fiancée is struggling with her degree while juggling work with school, so he generously offered to pay for her last two semesters. Our kind fellow wants her to focus on her studies and graduate without loans, plus he also wants to start their marriage on solid ground, so obviously, he doesn’t mind helping her out.
Now that is where the drama started as word got out and his sister came demanding that he also pay for her college too. Apparently, she is bitter about the fact that he got out of poverty and is doing so well, while the rest of his family is struggling. However, our protagonist worked really hard to get here, and he’s not even close with this sister, who he thinks is asking out of entitlement and not need.
Even his parents got involved and played the “family first” act, despite the fact that he has occasionally helped them in the past. Now, he refuses to be the family ATM, stuck to his decision and is refusing to pay for his sister, but still feeling torn, he sought some advice online.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Folks online commented that OP’s sister was being downright unreasonable in her demands. They said that he should tell his parents that he is indeed putting his family first, which is his fiancée. Some even chastised him for sharing all his personal financial information with the family and that he shouldn’t have told them in the first place that he’s paying for his fiancée.
To understand more about family dynamics, financial boundaries, and entitlement in such situations, Bored Panda interviewed Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She explained that when one sibling significantly outpaces others in financial success, it can trigger resentment and a sense of unfairness.
“Rather than attributing the success to hard work and personal choices, struggling family members may see it as ‘luck’ or external circumstances, making them feel entitled to a share,” she added. She also stressed that in such situations, it’s important to set financial boundaries with family, no matter how unpleasant it might seem.
“Family members might unconsciously—or intentionally—use guilt, emotional appeals, or even passive-aggressive tactics to pressure the successful sibling into providing financial help. During such times, it’s important to stay calm and reinforce your boundaries without engaging in conflict. Don’t jeopardize your own well-being or future just to meet family expectations,” Prof. Lobo concluded.
Well, it seems like OP is right to think about his fiancée rather than cater to his entitled sister. Do you agree? Let us know in the comments!
Folks said that he was right to refuse his sister, and some even advised him against sharing financial information with his family
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What do you think ?
Binky Melnik 10 months ago (edited)
You spoke Stake’s ONLY requirement for a sponsored article is that their name be mentioned out of context? Really? Try looking into a sponsored ads so you’ll understand what one is an isn’t. Merely using a verb or a noun once, with no context, no marketing words, nothing at all doesn’t qualify. It’s a fair amount of work to get paid for a sponsored ad (unless you’re an influencer who can be paid $75K a post, and even then, merely using a trademark isn’t sufficient.) And to answer your question: Even if it were an attempt, it’s failed badly (at this point, none of us knows what “Stake” is besides Stake users).
Load More Replies...
Tabitha 10 months ago
Help out the fiancée, and help guide sister to make it on her own too. No handouts, but a good blueprint for becoming self-made. Do the same for the other siblings. Tell parents to stay out of it. Go LC or NC with anyone who gives you any guff about it. Done.
Ms.GB 10 months ago
Yeah. Just giving her advice on what steps to take is valuable.
Load More Replies...
TribbleThinking 10 months ago (edited)
"You can choose - continue complaining or continue having some bills paid. The choice is yours. One more complaint, and I will take it that you've chosen "continue complaining".
Vinnie 10 months ago
The family will likely also complain that the OP is favouring his life partner... Duh, of course he does!
Load More Replies...
Mark Childers 10 months ago
I was largely left to myself during childhood, as my younger sister was pretty sick and had some issues. I was fine with it, as I've always enjoyed my alone time. So I never expected anything from anyone, but when someone does something for me, it makes me happy. People, even family, shouldn't expect others to do things for them, especially when it comes to money. It's nice when they do, but it's not their responsibility. The sister seems very bitter and entitled.
Vinnie 10 months ago (edited)
Let's see... OP can help sister out because "family first" or help fiancé because he has a future with her... Sorry, sis, you're likely to be the l0ser in the battle between entitlement and reciprocity.
Ms.GB 10 months ago (edited)
Yeah when you become an adult and you're getting married THAT is your family. That's the family you're making and that should be your first priority. You're not going to be building a life and planning your retirement with mom, dad and sis. You're not buying a house, living your life or having children with anyone but your spouse. Your parents made the choices they made and built a family they couldn't financially care for, that's not OPs problem. Maybe if his parents had put their family first as they are suggesting OP do they would've spent money to make sure their first child was taken care of properly rather than having 4 more so they couldn't care for any of them.
Load More Replies... Lady Eowyn 10 months ago
Family shamily. The whole "do it for the family" thing is BS all around. You only seem to hear this card played when someone wants financial support.
Romy Rösli 10 months ago
The biggest AH here are the parents for having 5 kids when they could barely afford one.
Binky Melnik 10 months ago
They had three kids, not five. It was a family of five.
Load More Replies...
Andrew Bome 9 months ago
I would help my sister out; but after I helped my fiance. And if I can't help both, then the fiance is the priority. Because she is the most important member of the family.
Binky Melnik 10 months ago (edited)
You spoke Stake’s ONLY requirement for a sponsored article is that their name be mentioned out of context? Really? Try looking into a sponsored ads so you’ll understand what one is an isn’t. Merely using a verb or a noun once, with no context, no marketing words, nothing at all doesn’t qualify. It’s a fair amount of work to get paid for a sponsored ad (unless you’re an influencer who can be paid $75K a post, and even then, merely using a trademark isn’t sufficient.) And to answer your question: Even if it were an attempt, it’s failed badly (at this point, none of us knows what “Stake” is besides Stake users).
Load More Replies... Tabitha 10 months ago
Help out the fiancée, and help guide sister to make it on her own too. No handouts, but a good blueprint for becoming self-made. Do the same for the other siblings. Tell parents to stay out of it. Go LC or NC with anyone who gives you any guff about it. Done.
Ms.GB 10 months ago
Yeah. Just giving her advice on what steps to take is valuable.
Load More Replies... TribbleThinking 10 months ago (edited)
"You can choose - continue complaining or continue having some bills paid. The choice is yours. One more complaint, and I will take it that you've chosen "continue complaining".
Vinnie 10 months ago
The family will likely also complain that the OP is favouring his life partner... Duh, of course he does!
Load More Replies... Mark Childers 10 months ago
I was largely left to myself during childhood, as my younger sister was pretty sick and had some issues. I was fine with it, as I've always enjoyed my alone time. So I never expected anything from anyone, but when someone does something for me, it makes me happy. People, even family, shouldn't expect others to do things for them, especially when it comes to money. It's nice when they do, but it's not their responsibility. The sister seems very bitter and entitled.
Vinnie 10 months ago (edited)
Let's see... OP can help sister out because "family first" or help fiancé because he has a future with her... Sorry, sis, you're likely to be the l0ser in the battle between entitlement and reciprocity.
Ms.GB 10 months ago (edited)
Yeah when you become an adult and you're getting married THAT is your family. That's the family you're making and that should be your first priority. You're not going to be building a life and planning your retirement with mom, dad and sis. You're not buying a house, living your life or having children with anyone but your spouse. Your parents made the choices they made and built a family they couldn't financially care for, that's not OPs problem. Maybe if his parents had put their family first as they are suggesting OP do they would've spent money to make sure their first child was taken care of properly rather than having 4 more so they couldn't care for any of them.
Load More Replies... Lady Eowyn 10 months ago
Family shamily. The whole "do it for the family" thing is BS all around. You only seem to hear this card played when someone wants financial support.
Romy Rösli 10 months ago
The biggest AH here are the parents for having 5 kids when they could barely afford one.
Binky Melnik 10 months ago
They had three kids, not five. It was a family of five.
Load More Replies... Andrew Bome 9 months ago
I would help my sister out; but after I helped my fiance. And if I can't help both, then the fiance is the priority. Because she is the most important member of the family.
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