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A few years ago, hundreds of people religiously followed their pastor into the woods, where they built a village. It had seemed like a no-brainer for many of them, who were offered parcels of land for less than $100. Little did they know they were being led astray...
429 bodies, including 191 children, would later be found by Kenyan police. Many had heeded the call to starve to death, after being told by their leader that the world was coming to an end, and that this was their golden ticket to heaven. A taxi driver turned self-proclaimed pastor went on trial last year, blamed for what's been dubbed one of the worst cult-related disasters in history.
There are cults all over the world; some experts say up to 10,000 in the U.S. alone. Some members never get out. Others die trying. But fortunately, there are many who manage to escape and live to tell the tale. Someone recently asked former cult members to share the exact moment they realized they were in a cult, and hundreds of eye-opening answers followed.
Bored Panda has put together a list of the top ones, to shine a light on these underground communities that thousands find themselves caught up in every year. We also managed to secure an in-depth interview with renowned cult specialist and forensic psychologist Dr. Steven Eichel. He took us deep into the world of cultic culture. You'll find that between the images.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
They don't want you to go to college because you will be led astray by Evolution.
I went to college and they taught me about cults.
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago (edited)
If learning provable facts is enough to end a belief, then the belief was very likely contrary to reality. And this is why people who want power over you hate nothing as much as education.
A quiet coastal town in Kenya was left reeling when police made a gruesome discovery in the Shakahola forest near the Indian Ocean in 2023: Mass shallow graves containing hundreds of bodies, including men, women and children.
All had died sometime between January 2021 and September 2023, after being led into the forest by a man they respected and trusted, Paul Nthenge Mackenzie.
It would later emerge that Mackenzie, a former taxi driver, had pivoted to become a self-proclaimed pastor. He had a history of extremism and a slew of previous legal cases against him.
The pastor/cult leader had originally encouraged his followers to move to the Shakahola forest in preparation for the end of the world. He had offered them parcels of land for under $100 to entice them. Mackenzie reportedly partitioned the forest into different areas and gave them biblical names like Judea, Bethlehem and Nazareth.
A court would later hear that the self-proclaimed pastor had ordered his followers to starve themselves and their children so that they could get to heaven faster. This, he said, was their golden ticket to "meet Jesus." It's been dubbed one of the worst cult disasters ever.
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#2
I remember reading the factual history of black people in the Mormon church, from their own website while attending said Church. And thinking to myself "Dang, if I were a black person I sure wouldn't want to be a member of this Church!".
In that moment, the cognitive dissonance finally broke through 33 years of indoctrination. Why would I want to be a member of a church with such a racist past? I couldn't think of a single reason that outweighed their WELL-DOCUMENTED history of white supremacy.
Kristy Marion 2 weeks ago
Or that hid in plain site child abuse, patriarchy and racism. To the point of making Jesus a blue eyed white man so he becomes palatable to worship. Or as the case in one country worshipping an orange skinned hypocrite. I think most cults start off as wanting to find community but they are taken over by insane megalomaniacs.
Dr. Steven Eichel is a forensic psychologist and renowned cult specialist. Bored Panda reached out to him to delve deeper into the underground world of cults and to find out how to spot them. "Most people have heard of religious cults, but there are political cults, therapy cults, marketing cults, and cults that blend all of these together," Eichel told us during an intriguing interview.
Interestingly, Eichel says that due to the confusion around the term "cult," most of experts in the field refer to these groups as "high-demand" or "high-control" groups. But in this article, we will stick to the term "cult."
The forensic psychologist added that cults vary tremendously in the content of their beliefs and rituals. "However, their processes are usually very similar and that's how we recognize cults. Not by their 'crazy' beliefs, but by how people are treated in the group, and by the psychosocial processes they use to recruit and keep members," said the expert.
He tells us that there are several "tell-tale" signs of a cult. Most are very secretive and will only allow certain information to be known by the recruit. Groups that alienate members from loved ones, families, and friends are another sign. "Lovebombing" (paying special attention to the new recruit, or even hinting at the possibility of romance and/or s*x) is an indicator, he adds.
"Personal growth or therapy cults often make recruits sign NDA and other nondisclosure documents, or make you promise to never reveal the group's 'special' techniques or beliefs," reveals Eichel. "In the worst cases, like NXIVM and Scientology, they collect 'collateral' (information that, if revealed, would cause harm to the person) to ensure that you do not violate their rules about nondisclosure."
#3
I had been asking a lot of questions. I ended up being pulled aside by a couple of deacons and wanted to talk to me about my questions. They were kind and nice, but eventually I ended up having a meal 1:1 with one of the church elders. We had a really interesting conversation on theology, frameworks of thought and ideology. Even philosophy. At one point when we started addressing the questions I had, he asked me if I knew what the first sin was? I gave the usual catechism answer of disobedience. He praised my answer and corrected me. He said the first sin was when they questioned God, as it lead to the notion that they might know better. That lead to disobedience.
Interesting answer, I supposed. But klaxon alarms started going off in my head. “Are you saying it is a sin to ask questions?”
“It can be, yes.”
That was the first real crack in the dam. It desconstructed not long after.
AuspiciousTree283 2 weeks ago
Job was questioning God while his friends badgered him for doing that, and yet God rewarded Job for his honesty.
Eichel adds that asking for unusual donations of money and/or time can be a sign. "Most cults are apocalyptic in some way," says the specialist. "Time is always of the essence. So pressure to join or take classes or whatever 'as soon as possible!' is often present."
Unfortunately, many cult member don't realize this until it's too late, says Eichel, but there are usual "exit costs" that are eventually made known to the member. "That is, if they leave, all kinds of terrible things will happen to them (and/or loved ones)," he explained.
"In the Unification Church, leaving not only condemns you to hell, but also condemns all your ancestors and the souls of all your future progeny," Eichel told Bored Panda. "Compare this to the average 'mainstream' political group or church. If you leave the church, you may get a few calls or a visit from the pastor, but it is unlikely you will be told your life is now doomed for eternity."
#4
When I met an agnostic who became a close friend and I realized they knew more about what it meant to love another person better than any Christian I’d ever known.
LizzieBoredom 2 weeks ago
I have a theory about Christians. They need to keep the poor, poor so Christians have someone to pray for, and feel superior to.
#5
I was 14 or 15 at church and we were learning about “god’s plan”- the whole shebang from behind the veil to after death. and i asked the teacher a question- i can’t even remember what it was- and she said “huh, that’s a great question!! i’ll talk to the bishop and see if you’re allowed to ask that!”
i could tell she didn’t mean to phrase it that way, but she didn’t correct herself either. i was pissed though. i should be ALLOWED to ask whatever g*****n questions i want (and i expect you to have an answer of SOME kind), and if you don’t think i should be questioning something, i’m going to question everything. f**k you.
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
They reeaaallly don't like it when you ask questions they can't answer.
Eichel told Bored Panda that individuals vary tremendously with regard to how they respond to cultic influence. He says there are two broad categories of cult members, and they differ tremendously from each other.
Adults who are recruited into cults are known as "First Generation Adult" members or FGA for short. "Their lives and experiences are radically different from those who are born into cultic groups: Second Generation or Multiple Generation Adults (SGAs/MGAs)," he explains.
The expert says that coming out of a cult you were born into, that your family is in, is a very different process (and generally much more difficult) than it is for an adult who is recruited into a cult in college and then wants to leave 10 years later.
"The SGA will have a much more difficult time," the cult specialist tells us. "For example, one MGA left his cult at 18 and went to community college. In college, he was shamed for not knowing who Madonna was, or what rap and hip-hop are. He had no idea what Star Wars or Star Trek were about. He had never celebrated Christmas let alone 'demonic' holidays like Halloween. And, of course, he had no idea how to relate to college women."
#6
When I was at a band rehearsal and dropped to the floor all but screaming in pain from what turned out to be gallstones and instead of calling an ambulance for me they started praying over me, some in tongues. Literally physically restraining me to stop me as I struggled to get up to leave as one person suggested me wanting to leave meant i was possessed so they had to pray harder for me.
We asked Eichel to elaborate a bit more on how someone can recognize a cult. "The typical signs of a cultic group are: a highly charismatic leader, often with 'special' (e.g., divine) characteristics or abilities. In some cults, the leader is literally thought to be a god, or God," he revealed. "Cultic groups typically demand excessive commitments of time and money. They engage in intensive 'education' classes (sometimes disguised as 'Bible study') that are basically indoctrination classes."
The expert adds that cultic groups will tell you to avoid any information or informational venue that is critical of the group... and especially warn you not to talk to "apostates" that have left!
"Many cults cause estrangement or even total alienation from families of origin," he says. "They are deceptive in not being transparent about agendas, finances, the amount of coercion or control involved (e.g., you now have to give up your romantic and/or s*x life and only marry someone approved by the cult)."
Eichel cautions that any group that says it has the absolute and universal truth—whether that "truth" be evangelical Christianity, Wahabi Islam, or Revolutionary Marxism—should be suspect.
#7
I was at a religious university, which religion claimed they were "the only true church on the face of the earth". I had worked very hard to get into this university, and had absorbed all of the teachings and promises since the age of four, when my parents joined. I was also required to take a course each semester on the religion.
A few semesters in, I got curious regarding the claims of its founder. I wanted more details, wanted to read his own accounts of his experiences, unfiltered through the church's summaries. So off I went to the university library.
Unfortunately, the more I researched, the more cracks I found in his claims, in his life, in church history... until I realized he had been nothing but a con man, a liar, and the foundation of the church was rotten. As I kept looking, I also realized that everything above the foundation was rotten as well. It was all lies.
Finding this out broke my heart. Everything I had learned, everything that was expected of me in this life and the next was nothing but dust. American-Victorian dust. I couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again, and I couldn't spend my life pretending it was true.
And that's how I came to know that I had to leave the Mormon church. I couldn't do it that very moment. I had to disentangle my life and my psyche from the church, and that took a lot of years. Finding out the church isn't true was beginning a journey to recover from years of deceit and betrayal.
I wanted so desperately for it all to be true. But it's not, and the moment I found that out while sitting at a table in the Harold B. Lee Library at BYU, surrounded by books pulled from that very library's shelves, was the moment I knew I was a member of a cult.
If you put a list in front of you of the things that define a cult, the Mormon Church ticks every one of them.
Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 2 weeks ago
The Mormon Church is unfortunate that it is still a recent religion, there is a lot known about its founders, give the religion a few centuries where it can bury/destroy heretical facts then it will be just like the other older, religions.
#8
My father said, “I will never have an open mind because god says that’s how your brain falls out.”
Where the hell does it say that?!
Also he is a bigot so… empathy is a sin to him.
According to a review article published in the Journal of Forensic Psychology, people join cults for many different reasons. "Some join a group because of the benefits that it seems to offer them, while others do so in order to fill in an existing gap, whether it pertains to family, friends or lack of resources," reads the paper. "Whereas anyone could find themselves attracted to cults, their beliefs and teachings, individuals in transitional states of their lives were found to be the most vulnerable."
Fathima Badurdeen is a sociologist and expert on the history of religious extremism in Kenya’s coastal region. She says that many of Mackenzie's followers would have been unfazed by his bizarre demands.
They come from an area where poverty, unemployment and substance use are rampant, she explained. Many were desperate to escape their circumstances. "This charismatic preacher had filled a void for them,” Badurdeen told a reporter.
#9
I'm a former Jehovah's Witness. I learned after I had left. I had a*****e parents that would regularly beat me over false accusations, and I was isolated enough that my interaction with other JWs were limited to Bible studies. I quietly became an atheist since all of my prayers fell on deaf ears.
Then my parents did something very illegal. They scammed money from other relatives that needed it for medication. This resulted in the death of my uncle who died in my house. I went to the JWs for help. I got a meeting with elders.
They told me to forget about it and that I'd find peace joining them.
The research paper notes that cults use different psychological techniques to gain control over the identity of the new member, create confusion, and create a new cult pseudo-personality. "Although not all cults are destructive in nature, research shows that the majority of individuals who leave such groups experience psychological challenges associated with integration into society."
We asked Eichel what steps someone can take to safely leave a cult... "Support, support, support!" stressed the expert. "Connect with people who will support your right to think independently, to have doubts, to question. Find an ex-member group online (there are literally hundreds). Attend an ICSA meeting or conference. If possible, hire an 'exit counselor or engage a therapist who is cult-aware (sadly, a small number)."
#10
When my grandmother told me that men can have four women but I can’t have four men.
That’s when I decided I do not want to be part of that.
To be fair, I was never really inside the cult. But this part made sure that I immediately lost my interest for ever becoming part of that cult.
KatSaidWhat 2 weeks ago
I watched a harrowing documentary of Warren Jeffs and FLDS last weekend...
#11
When they sat me in a circle of women and told me how bad of a simgle parent I was for not making all the meetings with a six month old. My scorpion blood ran hot and I made all of them cry individually with what I knew about them. Last meeting I ever attended.
Eichel adds that anyone leaving a cult is likely to need a lot of help after exiting. But the the amount can vary depending on whether they are First Generation Adults or SGAs/MGAs.
"The latter generally need far more intensive assistance," the expert said. "Money is almost always an issue... cults typically demand all or most financial resources be turned over to the group. Very few SGAs/MGAs leave with anything close to enough money to live on."
On top of this, many do not have marketable skills, says Eichel. "One of my former patients, who had been a Scientologist from his teen years into his forties, asked me 'What do I put down on a resume? That I'm good at fundraising and bilking people of their money? That's the only employment I ever had.' So in general, the support they need is: financial, social, and therapeutic."
#12
When the surprise junior high youth group activity meant hustling us all, boys and girls, into a room together to be shown an extremely graphic film of an abortion being performed. No context, no warning, just straight to the action. It was 1979 and most us CHILDREN had never even heard of abortion at that point in our lives. The church elders gave zero s***s about the trauma they were inflicting, they just wanted to push their agenda.
#13
It was through one of those New Age "Angelic Reiki Healing" businesses. I was going to this place for over a year for mental health issues.
The former "mentor" convinced me to go off of my antidepressants. I felt horrible and had daily s*****e ideations. In the next session, I told her that I'm going back on them, and she responded with, "They block you from your higher self."
I shortly left that place. F**k her and her toxic b******t. It fractured my identity and had to reclaim myself.
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
If someone who isn't a qualified medical professional tells you to stop taking your meds, run away very fast.
Eichel told Bored Panda the most important message he tries to convey is, "Do not only look at how the group presents itself (Oh! What pretty colors that Hindu cult uses in their ceremonies! And those Scientologists were so helpful during 9/11!), or even the beliefs. Rather, look at the PROCESSES it uses to recruit, influence, and control."
The expert says that learning about cults is really about learning about influence and relationships. "In courtrooms, I discuss the 'cultic relationship' rather than sticking only to discussing the cult, because members are taught to actively brainwash themselves, even when not in the presence of their leader or group," Eichel reveals.
#14
When I realized it wasn't normal to screen other kids religious views before deciding who I could be friends with. .
#15
When my partner was telling me about a cult memoir she was reading and I was like, "Oh, I remember that!"
Thought I just grew up normal Christian, but no, I grew up in a hard-core f****d up Evangelical church. Turns out that's not normal Christianity.
"Members are not 'passive zombies' as they were often described in the 1970s and 1980s," Eichel said, adding that there's significant research suggesting that the same psychological processes—deception, manipulation, and coercive control—are present in relationships marked by domestic or intimate partner abuse. "And most importantly, in many gangs and in human trafficking."
Despite all of this, it is possible to get out, as many of the brave people on this list have proven.
#16
When I was told that I needed to believe everything Mormon prophets had taught, including horribly racist and sexist teachings that I could not deny were completely wrong on so many levels (like the only way for God to forgive interracial marriage was to both k**l yourself and any kids had with your interracial partner).
And then when I pushed back I was told I needed to just have faith these same horrible prophets had been called of God and then was given terrible excuses for why they taught such obviously immoral and unethical things.
Being raised from birth in the Mormon cult I could excuse a lot of things, but some things were just so obviously horrible that I could not.
Then I learned later that using prayer as an objective truth finding system is a lie and does not work, and I was completely out, since those 'spiritual witnesses' were all that was keeping me in at that point.
Skara Brae 2 weeks ago (edited)
Speaking as a grandson of Mormon grandparents, I saw a few things that turned me away. Mormon churches are all about peer pressure, guilt-trips and manipulation to keep people in the church and docile. Quick example: When I was in college I met another student who was just about to go off on his mission. He knew I was not a believer, though I had attended church as a kid. Before he left on his mission he convinced me to give the church another try. He informed the church and they asked a family to come pick me up at my dorm (I had no car) on their way to church every Sunday. After christmas break, I waited outside to be picked up, but the family never showed up. I found out later that this family were just trying out the church and they were asked to pick me up to make them feel obligated to keep attending. I was furious. I'll reply with another event.
#17
When I was told that confirmation was me choosing to become an adult in the church, I told them I wasn’t interested, and they said do it anyway or we’ll make you regret it.
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
Ah, there's nothing like threats to confirm God's unconditional love in someone's heart, is there?
#18
When I was a teenager, my church hosted a week long “seminar” on “basic life principles”. I remembered going to a week long event as a child and doing lots of coloring pages while my parents were in meetings, but didn’t know what it was. Turns out it was Bill Gothard and the Institute of Basic Life Principles. (See the Duggars and the doc Happy Shiny People). Suddenly being homeschooled, all the extreme physical punishment, “don’t ask questions, just trust and believe” and only being allowed to associate with church members made sense….
SchadenFreudian Psychology 2 weeks ago
It should be illegal for people to do this to their children.
#19
I knew that I was in a cult when I was told:
> "This is the only true and living church upon the face of the whole earth, with which I, the Lord, am well pleased."
—Doctrine & Covenants 1:30
This was often shortened to "our church is the only one true church."
This was in the late '80s, and I was around 8 years old. Even at that age, I thought their claim was just too over the top.
Now my former cult says things like "Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith" (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, October 2013) and "Only read approved church sources."
I had to wait until I was 18 to escape. My entire family is still drinking the Kool-Aid.
#20
I was raised a Jehovas Witness and sadly I didn’t realize it was a cult until after I got out. They love to remind everyone all the time how it’s not a cult and always have an excuse for when people say “that’s exactly what a cult tells you” and yes that’s because it is one lol.
#21
Two moments for me: when my a****r lied to my face about something I knew happened and when I was talking to a therapist later.
The first moment made me realize my reality was a lie and had been orchestrated by my a****r. Even though I didn't have the language (yet) to understand the depth of what I went through, I knew it was bad.
When I was talking about my experiences with a therapist, she was the one to suggest I look into cult survivor stories because she believed I had been in one.
My middle school and high school friend group was structured like a cult, and fulfills enough of the characteristics to be classified as one. Not all cults are ooks and spooks, and some a****rs start incredibly young.
#22
When my partner and I got married and went through the Mormon Temple for the first time.
Did I question it growing up, hell yeah. Spiritual polygamy really f****d me up. But sitting in what was to be the holiest place, the highest achievement and watching people do things like secret handshakes, chants and weird touching. It cracked my shelf.
zububonsai 2 weeks ago (edited)
From what I know about Mormon clothing the bride in this picture is NOT Mormon (or she would be called out for being an indecent hussy). You can see ARMS! SHOULDERS! and probably even COLLARBONES! Mormons would be clutching their nonexistent pearls at this.
#23
Most people don't leave a cult until the cult wrongs them or someone they love.
In my case they were very cruel to a friend of mine, so i was out.
#24
When the main pastor died and his son-in-law took over. He was not a pastor. He was a business man. It later came out he was very crooked. He’d already been in prison, that all the adults in the church claimed was a setup by the govt. he used the church to set up more MLM s**t selling everything from vitamins to green tea to his s****y photography. My brother and I pretty much stopped being a part of it after college but we couldn’t convince our parents to leave.
Even after the head of the church was found dead under really strange circumstances, and his kids went to prison (one went into hiding) they stayed as their whole social life was other members.
As much as I tried my mom just said they will face judgement before god and continued to do her mission work till her last dying day. It really makes me sad that my parents were very smart people and yet really dumb and sacrificed their entire lives for these crooks. .
#25
When, in a public sermon, one of the leaders rhetorically asked those leaving where they would go and what they would do with their lives if they didn't have the true church in it. It made me realize how much of my life had been shaped around serving an organization that only cared about keeping me there so I could continue giving it money. That and my recent discovery of some unsettling history the leadership had kept very quiet about. Where did I go and what did I do after leaving? Whatever I wanted to.
#26
"Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average."
As this was being read, I looked around the room at all of the stone faces. That's when I realized just how absurd it was.
#27
When I went through the Mormon temple ceremony and they started chanting in a circle 🙃 the temple clothes are also super culty.
#28
I was in a political cult for several years. The first crack appeared when I read about struggle sessions during the Cultural Revolution in China--it reminded me a lot of how the organization trained people to confront and tear down people with beliefs that diverged from the group's political values. Of course, the group I was in didn't use the physical violence/hair shaving, etc. that Maoist struggle sessions did, but all the vitriol, prepared agitation, and intentional humiliation was there.
Then I moved a few states over for work, and didn't really think about it for a while. A few years later, a friend posted about their bad experiences on the group on Facebook, and shortly after I learned about the BITE model from a deconstruction podcast. The organization I had been a part of checked every box. That was when the floodgates really opened. .
#29
I watched a TED talk from a woman who was raised in a cult in New Zealand. Her grandfather had founded it and it had very amish-esque principles, which differs from my own experience, but the line that stood out to me was when she was playing soccer with her peers and a boy, her friend, (class clown, often making jokes) made a joke the coach didn’t like so he beat him in front of everyone. While it happened, frozen and unable to help, she kept thinking “how is this love? How can this be godly love?” That phrase directly mirrored a “teaching” i’d been told all my life, even through abuse from my family. In my ex cult they liked to profess that every person was inspired by god and directed by him, and they prayed to receive “guidance”. But that abuse wasn’t love. Love wouldn’t hurt you like that.
Anyways, that was the moment it clicked. I researched cults and control tactics and the BITE model after that, and quickly fell into disillusionment with the religion. I’ve been out for five years now and I haven’t looked back.
#32
Weirdly enough, the founder of my old cult (The Family International, formerly known as The Children of God) didn't shy away from the cult label. At least not internally.
So I guess I realized it when I was a kid, and I read something he wrote along the lines of, "Yes we're a cult. All religions are cults. Ours is just better."
The man was insane, and did a lot of f****d up things, but I kind of respect that candor, even now.
#33
I was raised Unitarian Universalist, which isn't actually a cult but a lot of fundamentalists call it one anyway. I remember learning that and just laughing because it was such a stupid idea. .
#34
I was a yoga teacher. I really really tried to be in the cult. I wanted to believe in god. I wanted to have people that would have my back. I wanted to be connected. I just couldn’t do it, it made me cringe and most yoga teachers are f*****g two faced a******s. People would just repeat things they heard with no thought as to the truthfulness to it. It makes me sad. I’m out.
The idea of cult though is interesting in the yoga world because it can be a spiritual cult, or it can be a Lululemon wearing rich white lady cult where everyone looks the same, acts the same, and your identity is wrapped up in how you look and your physical prowess. A lot of times men end up and the top of the power structure in yoga studios/ideologies, and then it’s a s*x cult. There’s a lot to unpack here.
I just wanted to be in touch with myself and the world and it was an avalanche of nonsense.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 2 weeks ago
Yoga can be good when it’s done for physical fitness and stress relief. I recommend taking a class at a local rec center or a gym; that’s less likely to get culty.
#35
After visiting their headquarters and being given a guided tour, that was just one closed door after another, and then being given the cold shoulder for not wanting to take a picture with the rest of the tour group (all strangers) then seeing some of the leaders of the organization lie under oath in court about child a***e.
#36
The low level teachers who new members interact with were sweet old hippies who genuinely wanted to teach meditation and help people. The first time I met the higher ups (who got all the money) I immediately pegged them as users and narcissists.
Edit: One of you nailed it. I guess this experience is common with leaders of cults, other religions, politics, business...
#37
I backed away slowly because I learned things that made me question what I had been taught as fact, but maintained relationships with close friends and saw them outside of the community for a year or two. It wasn’t a religion but there’s a spiritual component to it so I wanted to be respectful of others’ beliefs though I knew it wasn’t for me anymore. This is something that isn’t frequently or unilaterally considered a cult (though many former members call it that) - but the behavior of certain groups of people in specific areas absolutely align with cult characteristics, and that culture had overtaken my particular community.
I thought I had enough in common with friends outside of this one thing that we could still connect. One person - a highly educated person who otherwise has strong critical thinking skills - asked with curiosity where I was coming from. After confirming that she actually wanted to hear because she probably wouldn’t like my response, I calmly and respectfully laid out all the things I know to be true that are in direct conflict with archaic and harmful dogma within this community. I reiterated that no longer participating is what I feel is right for me, but I’m not saying anyone else needs to do the same
This woman flipped her absolute s**t. She screeched loudly in a public space and got angry and defensive, calling me crazy and saying other disrespectful things. I’m sad for her, but too old and tired to deprogram anyone unwilling to consider reality, so got my stuff and walked away. I miss some of my friends but I don’t miss that community even the smallest bit.
Skara Brae 2 weeks ago
Only a person who is not confident in their beliefs would react that way. A confident believer would feel sadness that you didn't believe, not anger. One of my grandmothers was very confident. She was sad that my father wouldn't let me join the church (that's not at all what happened, but she told herself that). When she spoke about her beliefs it would send chills up my spine and creep me out. Sooo... narrow and unquestioning.
#38
When they made us write down our fears about would make us act them out in the back forty. Don’t like being alone? You’re going to be left alone in a pit. Feel weak? Wonderful you need to do the obstacle course during hurricane Katrina. Kids were coming back with swamp feet.
That’s when I made the plan to leave. Someone in leadership found out. They told me I’d go to hell if I left. They also told me when my mom got there I was to rip up the plane ticket and refuse to go with her. That was fun. Thanks Honor Academy.
#39
When my friend looked up my church on the internet, then sent me an article about how my church kidnapped and m******d people in its originating country.
#40
I told mom that I was SHing - she told me to pray about it because it was the devil working in me. And no, I didn't need therapy. I realized at that moment as a 14yo that God was more important to my mom than my wellbeing, and that's not normal.
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Rick Seiden 2 weeks ago
They censor words like b.u.l.l.y on this website. You really think they want to risk pissing off The "Church" of Scientology?
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KatSaidWhat 2 weeks ago
There's a documentary on netflix about Warren Jeffs and FLDS and it was pretty painful to watch. Particularly as despite his arrest for child r**e and all the abuse, most of them still wanted to stay.
J R 2 weeks ago (edited)
When I realized they didn't care about certain groups of people and, when I tried to question them, they seemed more interested in avoiding me. The first time I remember was during covid. We were doing online sermons, but there were pastors in the group chat. (Not the same ones speaking, so conversation wouldn't disrup lt people.) Trump was threatening human rights. The most recent issue was him trying to make it legal to deny trans people health care. The sermon was on loving ALL people and showing this through acts. So I said we should be advocating for trans people to have equal rights in health care. The pastor said this was a very important topic, and would I mind emailing them. So I emailed them. No response. Then after January 6, they couldn't even blame Trump. They didn't condone, but nor did they assign blame. This wasn't even a political church. But given how there were people launching a coup and invoking Jesus' name, I commented that the church needed to condemn Trump. They said this wasn't the time for that. So I left. And at first I tried other churches...only to find most churches are just as corrupt.
DC 2 weeks ago
You have a brain. You don't need any church - some are just less fücked up, but essentially, all religion is cult, all religion is lies, deception, hierarchy based on expertery on made-up stories. You're better off alone.
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Rick Seiden 2 weeks ago
They censor words like b.u.l.l.y on this website. You really think they want to risk pissing off The "Church" of Scientology?
Load More Replies... KatSaidWhat 2 weeks ago
There's a documentary on netflix about Warren Jeffs and FLDS and it was pretty painful to watch. Particularly as despite his arrest for child r**e and all the abuse, most of them still wanted to stay.
J R 2 weeks ago (edited)
When I realized they didn't care about certain groups of people and, when I tried to question them, they seemed more interested in avoiding me. The first time I remember was during covid. We were doing online sermons, but there were pastors in the group chat. (Not the same ones speaking, so conversation wouldn't disrup lt people.) Trump was threatening human rights. The most recent issue was him trying to make it legal to deny trans people health care. The sermon was on loving ALL people and showing this through acts. So I said we should be advocating for trans people to have equal rights in health care. The pastor said this was a very important topic, and would I mind emailing them. So I emailed them. No response. Then after January 6, they couldn't even blame Trump. They didn't condone, but nor did they assign blame. This wasn't even a political church. But given how there were people launching a coup and invoking Jesus' name, I commented that the church needed to condemn Trump. They said this wasn't the time for that. So I left. And at first I tried other churches...only to find most churches are just as corrupt.
DC 2 weeks ago
You have a brain. You don't need any church - some are just less fücked up, but essentially, all religion is cult, all religion is lies, deception, hierarchy based on expertery on made-up stories. You're better off alone.
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