“1/10 Would Not Recommend It”: 30 People That Followed Their Dreams Then Regretted It Share Their Stories
Interview
I always wanted to be an actor until I realized everything that the business side of the industry entailed. Without having wealth and nepotism on my side (and no desire to get a nose job), I realized there might be a career path out there that’s more gentle on my mental health.
Sometimes, we romanticize things that we aren’t perfectly suited for, and that's okay! One curious Reddit user recently asked others to share things they dreamed of doing their whole lives, only to realize they actually hated them, and hundreds of people weighed in. Read on to find some of their most honest responses, as well as a chat with the person who sparked this conversation in the first place, and take this as a friendly reminder that you can always change your mind!
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Join the military. 1/10 would not recommend it. The only good that came out of it was being able to say I traveled and lived in a foreign country and I could have done that on my own. Its the most toxic workplace on Earth and for women, it's a real s**t show of sexual predators, misogyny and abuse by ignorant, immature young men who have -0- respect for women as a whole who are given far too much responsibility and power long before they have the brains or wisdom to use it.
I went into a Catholic seminary after high school joining a Catholic religious order. The ensuing years totally deconstructed the myth and mystique of the religion as I saw how many of the priest were complete frauds in their own character.
After the Church, I joined the Police Department hoping again to serve people in need. I've never seen so much stupid concentrated in one organization. I would rather live as a hermit than spend another day with a bunch of lazy, lying, conniving asshats who barely made it out of high school.
Truly disturbing in both institutions was the level in which "rank" entitled you to set alternate reality.
F**k both of them.
Two of the absolute worst offenders there are... The church and the cops...
To learn more about how this conversation started in the first place, we reached out to Reddit user Buzzkill007, who posed the question, “Have you ever dreamed of doing something your whole life only to find out, once you did it, that you hated it? What was it?” And lucky for us, he was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda. “I've been doing a lot of processing about my life lately - where I've been, how I got here, that sort of thing,” the OP shared. “Started thinking about what I used to dream about becoming or doing when I was a kid, and how my experience pursuing a dream didn't quite go as well as I had imagined.”
Teaching.
And god no not because of the kids, they were hilarious amazing and loved to learn.
I f*****g couldn't stand the other teachers and staff members superiority complexes F*****G STOP BEING SO ANGRY & CONTROLLING TOWARDS GOD DAMN 8 YEAR OLDS WHO HAVE TO BE HERE
I heard this story from a friend, and have no reason to believe it's fake, but I never met any of the people involved.
There's a couple, the husband really wanted a 3some their entire marriage. The wife always refused, at least partially because they had a kid, and she didn't want their sexcapades to affect the child in any way.
Fast forward 20 years or so, the kids are all out of the house, and the husband keeps bringing it up (not sure he ever stopped, really). The wife just so happened to have a coworker that she was becoming really good friends with, who she also found very attractive, and so one day (prior to the husband's birthday), the wife asked her coworker if she would be down to join her and her husband. The coworker said yes.
Husband's birthday, the wife surprises him with the 3some. Afterwards, the husband's reaction was "well that wasn't really the mind-blowing experience I expected it to be. Oh well, my wife is awesome for doing that for me."
Now, I might be missing a few details here, but the wife realized she enjoyed being with the other woman far more than she enjoyed being with her husband. She ended up leaving her husband and is now in a committed relationship with the coworker.
Good for them, tbh. I think I'd be very upset if my husband kept pushing a 3some for years and years
We were also curious if Buzzkill007 had ever been disappointed by something he had romanticized doing. “I was pretty highly imaginative and creative growing up, and had always wanted to pursue something in an artistic field. I ended up in graphic design,” he told Bored Panda. “There are a lot of positives in that field, and I did have some good experiences with it. I stayed with it for 14 years. But it ended with me having a mental breakdown. I can't blame the breakdown solely on the industry - there were several factors outside of work happening at the time - but the stresses of having to be creative on demand (and other things inherent to the industry) certainly contributed. When the dust had settled, I had not only lost my job, but I had pretty much burned out on wanting to be creative in any capacity. I've slowly started getting that desire back, but I doubt I'll ever want to make a career of it.”
Being an EMT
I had planned on it being my lifelong career since middle school. I loved the medical field and wanted to save lives but knew I wouldn’t have the stamina to get through medical school.
I got into training as soon as I graduated high school and I was top of my class in the educational sense, but as soon as I started doing ride-alongs everything just kind of fell apart on me.
I didn’t fit in well with the firefighters, which sounds stupid but I think I really needed that brotherhood if I was going to survive in that field. The real problem, however, was my empathy. I knew quickly that I would not be able to see people on their worst days everyday. I could deal with broken bones and blood, but I hadn’t prepared myself for the screams.
On my third ride-along I responded to a teenage su**ide, and that was it for me. I work for a museum now lol.
Being the boss of people. Boss is a title, but being an effective leader of people is an emotionally draining, often thankless roller coaster.
People are the hardest part of working with others.....effective leaders so often give more of themselves than they really have to spare. I only have a small team...close knit and pretty good people, and managing them can be bone crushingly exhausting. It's hard ....and you are not generally financially rewarded enough for the time and effort it takes. ....and most likely not appreciated or thanked for going above and beyond in making your team high functioning
The OP also shared his thoughts on the replies his post received. “I was honestly surprised at the number of people who responded, as well as the breadth of experiences out there,” he said. “It helps to know that this sort of thing isn't just me. I was also interested to see the number of creatives out there who shared similar experiences.”
Touching boobs. Which male, straight teen doesn't wanna touch boobs? Obviously I wanted to do so, and the desire made me create high expectations. When I did it ended up being a disappointment. The girl was hot, but her personality was s**t. She grabbed my hands and put them in her tits. I didn't feel anything, and for some reason it felt forced and unnatural. Then I realized two things:
1. Nice boobs don't make up for s****y personality
2. Sexual experiences only feel good when you have feelings for the other person
I grew up watching romance movies and reading romance novels and always dreamed of a guy coming and sweeping me off my feet and then having hot sex with me.
When I actually got into my first relationship with a guy, I realized I was gay.
I once read an author wondering why guys are not like books/movies, like, it's not even high standards, we are just looking for someone funny, loyal, honest and supportive
And to all the pandas out there who have experienced something similar, Buzzkill007 reminded us that we’re not alone. “I think it's human nature to dream about what's possible,” he told Bored Panda. “Humanity has achieved some great (and some terrible) things because we have imagination. Sure, some of our dreams and expectations can be naïve and unrealistic. But maybe that's just part of learning and growing. I do think that (at least in my case) the best teacher is experience, but there is a lot of value in spending time in the classroom and studying your chosen subject of interest.”
When I was young my dream was to be a fashion model and at seventeen after my parents approval I did it from the ages of 17-23. It was not what I had dreamt of, it was worse. I literally starved myself to look a certain way, only did cardio and light weights in the gym and was constantly critiqued on my body, looks, skin, hair. I took a semester off of university to recover after developing severe anxiety and depression.
I never understood the need of achieving a type of body that 90% of the population won't ever have
We hope you never give up on your dreams, pandas, but if you reach a point where you decide they're just not for you anymore, don't beat yourself up! Enjoy reading through these reminders that sometimes life has something even better in store for us than what we imagined, and feel free to share your own stories in the comments. Then, after you're finished here, if you're interested in checking out another Bored Panda article discussing why some people's dream jobs let them down, we recommend reading this piece next!
I once had a chat with an Uber driver in LA about her dream and how it didn’t turn out as she expected.
Born and raised in Moldova, she grew up dreaming of being a politician so she could one day make a positive impact on her country. She studied hard and made it into a nice university, but once the first set of finals came, the teacher faced the class and said, “To those who studied, good job. To those who didn’t, a C is $300, a B is $400, and an A in the class is $500.”
At that point she realized her country was corrupt beyond what she could ever hope to fix in her lifetime and immediately dropped out.
A few years later she won a lottery to obtain a visa to move to the US. She took her mom and brother, who is now able to follow his own dream of producing Maldovan music at a professional level and is becoming increasingly popular in their homeland and surrounding countries.
Spent 6 years of my life in choir, thinking I wanted to be an opera singer or perform in musicals. Got to my first year of college as a vocal performance major, and realized I wasn't actually willing to learn most of what was required. I had never played an instrument or taken lessons on it before, so I was s**t at music theory. Then I had to take a piano class, that I was also s**t at, with 3 more years of those to expect in the future. I didn't have the same kind of flamboyant music kid personality of all my classmates, so I had a difficult time getting along with everyone.
The only thing I had was a good voice, but without any interest in anything other than actively singing. I finally realized that it wasn't the career path for me, and that I didn't want to become famous, or deal with the bs that comes along with trying to get consistent work in that industry. I found that I enjoy singing most when my husband is having a difficult time, and I can help him fall asleep at night by just singing his favorite song. He's knocked out by time I finish the first stanza usually. Makes me feel like I didn't waste all that time for nothing.
My sister and I are both trained opera singers. And we've both been secretaries for the last 15+ years. I still have 3 Italian operas memorized and I do not speak a word of Italian.
Med school. I was sooo excited to observe a surgery. I fainted...
At least there are many other less aggressive options lol
Living with my partner.
We were, and are, a perfect match. Even now we've gone our separate ways romantically, we're still best friends. I'd take a bullet for that m**********r.
In my head it would be all baking cookies and filthy sex. While I was at work he'd do some of the household upkeep. Our friends could come over whenever to party.
In reality I was working a job that I hated so much it nearly killed me, and he was clinically depressed and trying to get his thesis over the line. The apartment was too small, and it STANK, even before we both stopped doing any cleaning. We were so miserable we just ate takeout every night and went to sleep without so much as a kiss. Partying isn't really on the cards when you're one iota away from hanging yourself.
If I couldn't make it work with him, I figured it's not for me. I was right. Been living alone for 6 years now, and I couldn't imagine giving up the independence it gives me for anything or anyone.
After being divorced twice (no kids), I've been living alone for the past 40 yrs & wouldn't have it any other way.
Traveling for work. You spend a lot of time in hotels and rarely get the opportunity to see anything besides that due to flight schedules. And being hungover on an airplane is an awful experience.
"I want to be an environmental lawyer when I grow up! I'm going to help save the world!" F*****g kill me dude, I don't even have the energy to save myself anymore.
I changed my name. When the name change was accepted and I received the letter with my new name on it I freaked out and changed it back the same day.
All my life I wanted to make cartoons.
I fought with tooth and nail to reach the top.
Then I interned for an old studio in Burbank specializing in cartoons about a *certain yellow family.*
Then, after college, I became a mechanic and never looked back.
Not me, but my first girlfriend when i was 18. She had always wanted to be an eye doctor. Had been her dream for years. Graduated undergrad, got accepted to Optometry school. Graduated with great grades. Got a job ... and within a year or so realized she didn't want to spend the rest of her life asking " which is better, #1 or #2." Went back to school and became a nurse for traumatic brain injuries. She's much happier now. Still does optometry on the side for extra money.
Being a cop. I quit after 6 months.
Typical story if a kid growing up in a sh*thole that had a cop “big brother”. He made me feel better about myself and gave me courage/confidence etc so I always grew up wanting to make the world a better place and help out the kids growing up like I did. When I got in I realized that my department cared more about the letter of the law and less about the spirit of the law. When I would take an opportunity to teach someone why they were doing bad instead of punishing them, I got punished. I put too many people in cuffs that had called me for help (sending the image of if you call for help your going to jail) than I care to admit and I just couldn’t do it anymore. I’m sure there are better departments out there but this killed it for me.
I'm assuming this is US centric. In most first world countries you need a university degree to become a police officer, it really helps weed out a lot of people who aren't suitable to police work.
Moving to another country. I loved the romantic idea of moving to a new place and finding out about the culture.
Turns out it's expensive, it's complicated and it's tiring as f**k.
Only silver lining is that I'll have a few good stories to tell... To no one since I basically lost all my friends.
It was an amazing experience for me, so either I'm an exception to the rule or... there is no rule 🙃
Having endless time to read, watch tv, do hobbies.
I had four foot/ankle surgeries in as many years, that required months each of recuperation in a recliner with my foot elevated. Not painful, but SO BORING. There really is only so much tv you can watch, books you can read, hobbies you can practice, etc. I got to the point that I was sleeping endlessly and pointlessly.
I always used to think wouldn’t it be nice to have a month off so I could catch up with all my admin and tidy up etc. Now I’m chronically sick, and not working, it’s not the same as having time off at all, when people think you’re being lazy, you’re just resting to cope!
I grew up with my dream career path being to become a police officer, and eventually a detective hopefully. This lasted up into college when I started the process of doing ride alongs and what not. Thats when I learned 95% of the job is ruining people's lives instead of helping or saving anyone. Now I do tech support and life is misery but at least I actually help people now and then.
Visiting Vegas. I loved the idea of a city based on games. Turns out, I like fair games.
Being a veterinarian. I never became a vet, but one of my first jobs in high school, having wanted to be a vet my whole life, was in a vet clinic. I was ecstatic. Vet clinics are depressing AF. Dogs and cats hit my cars coming in to the clinic in horrendous pain. It always smells like s**t from fecal floats (checking for worms), pets that got put down but could have been saved if only their owners could have afforded it. 2 freezers in basement- one for dead dogs, and one for dead cats. They get hauled to the basement freezer in trash bags in case they release waste after they die. I couldn't take after only a few months and left.
Personal training/strength coaching. I told myself I was going to find, support, and coach the next Arnold for years, but I was just stuck with a geriatric population and people who constantly thought my degree in exercise science was a google search or the right Instagram post away. A THIGH GAP IS NOT A FITNESS GOAL. GO TO THERAPY.
Best personal trainer I ever had was great at hand holding. And figuring out stuff for ME and not Arnold.
Being a Chef, I left highschool in year 10 too get a cert ||| in commerical cookery as I loved cooking and making dishes at home. Loved it for the first few months than realised how draining it is. I do split shifts 9:00am-2:30pm than 5:00pm-9 sometimes 9:30pm. Its Exhausting after doing it for 4 years. You loose your appetite completely. I recently had a knee injury and have been off for a few weeks its really made my anxiety and depression calm down after not being torn too bits by chefs who have had 20+ years of experience and 'know' everything. Its making me realise Ive chosen the wrong career choice.
Being a youtuber. Terrible life.
I tutor on the side, I hate how many students under ten tell me things like, "I don't need to learn how to read; I wanna be a YouTuber when I grow up." No, child, no, you don't. I remind them that the odds of being a popular enough YouTuber to earn a living full time are very low. Also, even YouTubers need to know how to read. Stay in school, kids.
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I think it's ok, it gives you a perspective on what a specific job is really like.
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Am I lucky or cursed? I never had any romanticized illusions about any kind of work. I did love being a forklift driver, but I always say the work is great but the employers are terrible. I don't mind what I do now but I long since realized it's almost impossible to get a woodwind instrument perfect, and they're generally disgusting from people blowing into them all the time
I've never had any idea what I want to do. I'm 46 and a fire protection engineer. I just kind of fell into it. I don't like it. I've got degrees in education and ministry also, as well as social work and counseling. Microsoft Systems Engineer, Computer Technician Web, Design. Was a mechanic, Landscaper. Warehouse manager. Limousine Chauffer, etc.. Just wandering. Nothing even sounds appealing.
A lot of people don't have a drive towards any type of career. That's OK. And far more common than most people realize. You work to live. If work is not allowing you to live, just exist, then it's time to train for a career that will allow you to live.
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I think it's ok, it gives you a perspective on what a specific job is really like.
Load More Replies... Am I lucky or cursed? I never had any romanticized illusions about any kind of work. I did love being a forklift driver, but I always say the work is great but the employers are terrible. I don't mind what I do now but I long since realized it's almost impossible to get a woodwind instrument perfect, and they're generally disgusting from people blowing into them all the time
I've never had any idea what I want to do. I'm 46 and a fire protection engineer. I just kind of fell into it. I don't like it. I've got degrees in education and ministry also, as well as social work and counseling. Microsoft Systems Engineer, Computer Technician Web, Design. Was a mechanic, Landscaper. Warehouse manager. Limousine Chauffer, etc.. Just wandering. Nothing even sounds appealing.
A lot of people don't have a drive towards any type of career. That's OK. And far more common than most people realize. You work to live. If work is not allowing you to live, just exist, then it's time to train for a career that will allow you to live.
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