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Mom Pays College Fees For Studious Daughter, Dropout Son Demands The Same, Gets Shut Down Fast
It’s commonly known that getting an education is a very acceptable way for a person to lead their life. And while that can be true for many, for others, it might be something that ruins life instead of making it better.
That’s what happened to today’s original poster’s daughter. Luckily, she ended up finding a way out of it, but not without her mother’s help. Yet, said help ended up being the instigator of drama in their family, and soon they were asking strangers online, “Who is the jerk here?”
More info: Reddit
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Education can be a lifesaver, but not when you end up with no prospects and crushing debt
Image credits: tan4ikk / Freepik (not the actual photo)
That’s exactly what happened to the young woman from today’s story – her history degree turned out to be useless and drowned her in loans
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She went to university because her mom pressured her to – something she’s felt guilty about ever since
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
So, after she got insurance after her husband’s passing, she decided to help her daughter with her debt
Image credits: Jolly-Prompt-6129
But when her son learned about it, he demanded the same amount in cash
After the OP’s husband passed away, she received a life insurance payout. She decided to use a portion of it to pay off her daughter’s student loans. You see, back in the day, she pressured her to go to university, which she didn’t really want to do. And as you know, universities cost a pretty penny.
According to 2025 statistics, student loan debt in the United States totals $1.814 trillion. That means that the average federal student loan debt balance is approximately $39,075, and the total average balance may be somewhere around $42,673. These numbers are hard to wrap our heads around, aren’t they?
The worst thing about these huge loans is that they can easily derail one’s life. For instance, it can make it harder for one to purchase or even rent a home, decrease their net worth, negatively impact their credit score, and many other things.
In fact, that’s what happened to the OP’s daughter – her life was heavily impacted by her student debt. She got a degree in history, which didn’t equip her with a high-paying job, which meant she was stuck in a never-ending cycle of making little and paying little towards the loans.
Years later, she got back in school and got a law degree, which finally gave her a good job, but doubled her debt. Essentially, her mom has always felt guilty over pressuring her daughter to get the degree in the first place, so she chose to pay off her loans with the insurance she got.
Image credits: jcomp / Freepik (not the actual photo)
We think it was a pretty nice thing for the mom to do. But little did they know, this wholesome act would cause a little drama in their family. When the woman’s younger son, a high school dropout, got a whiff of this transaction, he wanted something similar. To be more specific, he demanded that his mom give him the same amount of money in cash.
Yet, the mom refused to do so, saying the money for her sister was an educational expense. And since he never got an education, he doesn’t get it. Plus, the fact that he tends not to be so good with money doesn’t help his case. Yet, that doesn’t mean that the mom didn’t feel any guilt refusing money to her child, so this forced her to ask online – is she a big jerk here?
Some people thought she wasn’t – she was only helping her daughter to get out of a situation her son didn’t need to get out of. Others weren’t so sympathetic. They thought that the mom clearly showed her favoritism of her kids – one she put a lot of hope into and sent to school, while she let the other one drop out while he was still a minor.
So, in their eyes, she should find a way to make up for her son; it doesn’t have to be financial, but something needs to happen, as the current situation is only waiting to explode even more in the future.
What do you think – was the mom right not to give money to her son? Share your takes with us!
She refused to give it to him, since he was never academically gifted, which some netizens thought was a clear sign of her favoritism towards her daughter
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What do you think ?
Uncle Panda 2 months ago
Next letter - My second-class kid cut contact with me and I don't know why!
Ren Karlej 2 months ago (edited)
Well, I wonder if the son ended up in trouble with the law and didn't bother with his education because he was made to feel lesser than his sister, made to feel stupid. After all OP says 'he's not very smart'. Maybe he just gave up trying. I didn't end up in trouble with the law but I did not bother trying in school because my father kept telling me I was stupid. Why try if you have no one who believes in you? (I went back into education in my 20s as my partner was a thousand times more supportive than either of my parents). She favours the daughter because the son is problematic, but which came first? Children are usually very aware that they're not the favourite and may well act up for attention. She pressured her daughter, gave up on the son. Frankly, OP, I think your quite the shittty parent. This may have come a teeny weeny bit close to home... 😬
Nova Rook 2 months ago
There's a weird line in there - she claims her daughter would feel like a victim if OP gave the son $60k. How does that make the daughter into a victim? Does the daughter not want the son to be happy?
Tyke 2 months ago
Just showing her favouritism even more, she seems to relate every action back to how it will affect her daughter.
Load More Replies... Livingwithcfs 2 months ago
What a horrible mother (she might be a nice person, but not a mother). She pushed her daughter into a degree she didn't want, then makes her son feel less because he isn't academic. Id hate to have a mother like that.
Mark Stewart 2 months ago
Son is right she is playing favourites, any suggestions at evening things up she immediately shuts down as being unfair to her daughter but clearly doesn't give two hoots about things being unfair for him.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 2 months ago (edited)
Do you even like your son? Jesus; glad you're not my mum. HUGE GLARING A*****E
Day Andie 2 months ago
A law degree requires a 4- year undergrad degree. Pre-law, English, and history are the common ones. Son is problematic-wouldn't finish school, has numerous criminal charges, pisses away money and is an impulsive spender. Why should she reward any of THAT? If he's a postal worker, he has a good job, good salary, and good retirement if he stays with it, so he may have got his act together finally. My suggestion: she offers $10000 to get his high school degree along with paying a tutor if need be. Tell him she thinks he might have been a slow starter, but his job has proven that he can apply himself, and she believes in him. She can offer to fund more schooling or a business setup if he writes out a business plan and is serious-there are agencies that will help him do that. But money for him just to p**s away? That's c**p. She may only be unable to express herself well, or she may have failed as a mom,, but giving him money will NOT be fair, and it will NOT help him grow as a person.
monsieur mabel 2 months ago
......"i somewhat do favour her"............there, says it all................
🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking 2 months ago
Equal treatment would equal $60k spent on training. If he is not interested, that is on him, full stop.
Uncle Panda 2 months ago
Next letter - My second-class kid cut contact with me and I don't know why!
Ren Karlej 2 months ago (edited)
Well, I wonder if the son ended up in trouble with the law and didn't bother with his education because he was made to feel lesser than his sister, made to feel stupid. After all OP says 'he's not very smart'. Maybe he just gave up trying. I didn't end up in trouble with the law but I did not bother trying in school because my father kept telling me I was stupid. Why try if you have no one who believes in you? (I went back into education in my 20s as my partner was a thousand times more supportive than either of my parents). She favours the daughter because the son is problematic, but which came first? Children are usually very aware that they're not the favourite and may well act up for attention. She pressured her daughter, gave up on the son. Frankly, OP, I think your quite the shittty parent. This may have come a teeny weeny bit close to home... 😬
Nova Rook 2 months ago
There's a weird line in there - she claims her daughter would feel like a victim if OP gave the son $60k. How does that make the daughter into a victim? Does the daughter not want the son to be happy?
Tyke 2 months ago
Just showing her favouritism even more, she seems to relate every action back to how it will affect her daughter.
Load More Replies... Livingwithcfs 2 months ago
What a horrible mother (she might be a nice person, but not a mother). She pushed her daughter into a degree she didn't want, then makes her son feel less because he isn't academic. Id hate to have a mother like that.
Mark Stewart 2 months ago
Son is right she is playing favourites, any suggestions at evening things up she immediately shuts down as being unfair to her daughter but clearly doesn't give two hoots about things being unfair for him.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 2 months ago (edited)
Do you even like your son? Jesus; glad you're not my mum. HUGE GLARING A*****E
Day Andie 2 months ago
A law degree requires a 4- year undergrad degree. Pre-law, English, and history are the common ones. Son is problematic-wouldn't finish school, has numerous criminal charges, pisses away money and is an impulsive spender. Why should she reward any of THAT? If he's a postal worker, he has a good job, good salary, and good retirement if he stays with it, so he may have got his act together finally. My suggestion: she offers $10000 to get his high school degree along with paying a tutor if need be. Tell him she thinks he might have been a slow starter, but his job has proven that he can apply himself, and she believes in him. She can offer to fund more schooling or a business setup if he writes out a business plan and is serious-there are agencies that will help him do that. But money for him just to p**s away? That's c**p. She may only be unable to express herself well, or she may have failed as a mom,, but giving him money will NOT be fair, and it will NOT help him grow as a person.
monsieur mabel 2 months ago
......"i somewhat do favour her"............there, says it all................
🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking 2 months ago
Equal treatment would equal $60k spent on training. If he is not interested, that is on him, full stop.
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