Woman Shows What Incels Talk About Online, Posts Leave Viewers Stunned

The word incel is short for “involuntary celibate.” It’s most often used to describe men who say they want a romantic or sexual relationship but feel unable to find one. In many cases, that frustration gets aimed at women and girls through blame, objectification, and outright insults.

Online, incels gather in communities to swap stories and reinforce each other’s worldview. And while platforms like Reddit have banned some incel groups over violent content, there are still dedicated forums on the internet where they can post freely.

That’s what TikToker Kylie Brewer set out to show. In a video, she shared what it’s like inside one of these forums, and what she found was exactly as ugly as you’d expect—packed with misogyny, discrimination, and racism. She called the content “disgusting” and argued that websites like this should be banned.

Read more below, but be warned: some of the content may be upsetting.

On social media, many incel groups have been banned over violent content

Image credits: kylie.brewer

But there are still online forums where they can speak freely, and one woman took a look inside to show what it’s really like

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Image credits: kylie.brewer

Watch the full video below

@kylie.brewer Online hate turns into REAL-WORLD v!olence. These forums are so dangerous and need to be banned. 😭 #humanrights#leftist#education#intersectionalfeminism#antiracism♬ original sound – Kylie Brewer💝

Instead of saying “women,” incels often use the term “foid,” a dehumanizing label that implies they don’t see women as people

Seeing language like that, many viewers were disgusted by what they saw on the forum

However, some men jumped in to defend it in the comments

Where did incels come from and what do they believe?

The term “incel” might seem relatively new to mainstream conversations, but its origins tell a surprisingly different story. In 1997, a Canadian woman named Alana created an online community to connect with others experiencing similar struggles with dating and relationships. She originally called it “involuntary celibacy,” which she shortened to “invcel” and eventually “incel.” 

The space was meant to be inclusive and supportive—a place for people to share their experiences without judgment.

However, by the early 2000s, the community had begun to change. As incel communities established themselves on forum-based websites like Reddit and 4chan, the term transformed from its inclusive origins. 

What started as a supportive space evolved into something far more troubling. By 2010, incel became associated with hateful rhetoric and threats from men’s rights groups on fringe platforms.

Today’s incel communities share a specific worldview built around what they call “the blackpill”—a nihilistic belief that society is structured to benefit attractive men and women at the expense of everyone else. 

Members use specialized terminology to describe this perceived hierarchy. “Chads” and “Stacys” represent attractive men and women at the top, while “normies” occupy the middle tier. Incels place themselves at the bottom, believing their appearance makes romantic relationships impossible.

The community’s language reveals much about its ideology. Terms reference “The Matrix,” where taking a “red pill” means seeing harsh truths about reality. For incels, being “blackpilled” means accepting their belief that physical appearance determines everything in dating and that this hierarchy cannot be changed. 

Other terms are more concerning—some members use dehumanizing language when discussing women, reflecting the deep-seated hostility that characterizes many of these spaces.

What makes incel forums truly dangerous is that their online conversations don’t just stay online

While reading about incel ideology is deeply disturbing, the most dangerous aspect is how this online rhetoric translates into real-world consequences.

A study by researchers at Rutgers University and Penn State examined how new members are recruited and radicalized through the community’s specific language and belief system. The research identified a “pipeline” process where members move through increasingly extreme positions, from initial frustration to the most radical “blackpill” ideology.

The connection between online incel communities and violence has been documented by security agencies. In 2020, a Texas Department of Public Safety report warned that the incel movement represented an emerging domestic threat. 

A study by Bruce Hoffman and colleagues concluded that the violent manifestations of incel ideology pose a genuine threat that should not be dismissed by law enforcement.

Research examining incel forums found that some members actively participating in the online community had histories of violence toward women, including harassment and misconduct. A recent study used composite measures of harmful attitudes including hostility and justification of violence, noting these measures have been linked to real-world harm.

Many dismiss incel communities as simply out-of-touch individuals who should be ignored. But researchers and people speaking up online about these spaces are doing important work. 

Paying attention to how these communities operate and promote their ideology helps us understand a documented threat. Ignoring them completely could allow harmful beliefs to grow unchecked.

In another video, a woman shared that researchers monitored an incel forum for 18 months

Image credits: feministforeveryone

They found troubling signs of rising violence as well

Image credits: feministforeveryone

Watch the full video below

@feministforeveryone Researchers watched an incel forum for 18 months and here is what they found. #feminist#feminism#feministtiktok#metoo#sexism#equality#womenempowerment#womenempoweringwomen#ccdh♬ original sound – Feminism4Everyone

Commenters were shaken and upset by it, but glad it’s being studied instead of ignored

More digging into incel forums shows a common complaint: they claim “average women” get far more attention than “average men”

Image credits: NBC

But the “average” women they describe are closer to movie stars

Image credits: Professional_Suit270

Image credits: Lionsgate

Commenters, once again, pointed out just how out of touch incels seem

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