35 Y.O. Man Waits Until 17 Y.O. Turns 18 To Ask Her Out, Friend Questions If It’s Normal
There are many discussions and different opinions about people who are dating and have big age differences. Some couples feel uncomfortable about that and struggle, but others just don’t care and if they are happy together, then nothing else matters.
I am sure you have heard of this phrase that people like to say: ‘age is just a number’. Well, yes and no. I am sorry to break it to you, but sometimes this phrase can get you into trouble if your crush or partner is still a minor and you are basically double their age.
More info: Reddit
Guy says that ‘a true gentleman waits until they are 18 and then asks them out’
Image credits: Dziana Hasanbekava (not the actual photo)
Woman wonders if she is overreacting or if it’s really gross that her 35 Y.O. friend has a crush on a 17 Y.O.
Image credits: dementedbuthot
Image credits: Athena (not the actual photo)
The young woman promised to give the guy her phone number when she turns 18
Image credits: dementedbuthot
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
His friend is grossed out after he saved this 17 Y.O.’s photos from Facebook and sent them to his friends
One Reddit user decided to ask community members for their opinion on a situation with her friend. She emphasized that she thinks it’s gross that her 35 Y.O. friend is waiting for his coworker, who is 17 Y.O., to finally turn 18 so that he can ask her out. The post went viral and now it has over 52K upvotes and almost 18K comments.
The woman starts the story by saying that after a friend shared that he is waiting for his crush to turn 18 Y.O., she was immediately grossed out as such behavior is concerning. However, the guy said that in fact, it’s ‘gentlemanly material’ behavior and there is nothing weird or wrong with this. His young coworker also agreed to give him her phone number, but only when she turns 18.
What also worries the OP is that he has saved her pictures to his phone as he wanted to send them to his friends. Yeah, and that’s not all – the author found out that the girl he previously kinda dated was somebody who had just turned 18 years old. So, long story short, the author is all grossed out and even questioning if she wants to continue having such friends in her circle.
Folks online leaned more to the author’s side in this situation and agreed that something is not right. “She won’t realize how sketchy this is for another 5-6 years. Whereas OP knows this already,” one user wrote. Moreover, many people shared their personal stories of when they were harassed by older men: “Getting catcalled at 14 while walking to Taco Bell while wearing jeans and a hoodie,” one woman shared.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Moreover, netizens have discussed why an older man could be attracted to so much younger women: “I can’t imagine any 35 Y.O. being able to relate and date a 17-18 year old. They are basically kids, emotionally and otherwise,” one user wrote and received a lot of support. “I was 16 with a 26 Y.O. ‘boyfriend’ and now I’m 28 and talking to a 16 Y.O. is like talking to an alien for me,” another person emphasized.
Now let’s look at the main reasons that experts list why young women tend to be attracted to older men. According to Amelia Prinn, who is a relationship expert, older men are emotionally more stable and mature. Additionally, young women tend to look for a father figure in the men that they date. Basically, I am sure you have heard this phrase: ‘unresolved daddy issues.’ Older men are more financially secure. Most guys their age cannot provide the financial security they seek.
Moreover, looking the other way around, according to psychologist Elinor Greenberg men like younger women because they are easier to impress. “If a narcissistic man dates a woman his own age from his own social class, she is likely to be his equal with regard to education and life experience. She will not automatically idealize her partner.” Also, narcissistic men believe that coming to the party with a beautiful younger woman immediately boosts their status.
So, while there are various reasons why people can impress us, all of us have our reasons. As long as you are not breaking a law, you really like the person and you feel happy with them – you can be with whoever you want, it’s your life.
So guys, what’s your opinion on this situation?
Folks in the comments supported the woman that despite it being legal, it’s still not morally right
46Kviews
Share on Facebook
Creepy and illegal are not a completely over lapping venn diagrams. Happening to meet someone you connect with and find out they are 18 is one thing. Targeting women that young is quite another, which seems to be what this person is doing.
no I’m 31 & I can’t even imagine going out with someone under 27 as to me it’s weird. Let alone an 18 year old. I mind being 18 omg! as a grown a*s woman if a man 4 years old than me now targeted me at 18 it’s disgusting. They may be legal but mentally still like a child.
Load More Replies...
Complete creep. I was once the seventeen year old in this situation. We only talked while I was 17 but the day I graduated high school (a week or so after I turned 18) he started asking for more and more. This was all online though. I've always thought I was smarter than most people my age, but I sent him nude photos of me after I turned 18, and we would Skype. It didn't hit me until I was around 21 that we did not have a normal "long distance" relationship. I did all the talking, was the only one sending photos and he would praise how gorgeous I was, how mature I was, blah blah. When I broke things off with him I realized just how predatory it was (we had talked since I was 16), and I still got emails a few years after it all with him whining about missing me (read: not getting nude photos) and how he is a complete wreck without me, how talking to me was the only thing keeping him alive. I completely regret even interacting with him, and I worry pretty much everyday about the pictures
@Laura Lou, you were young and he groomed you. It is definitely not your fault. Please realize that. Good luck to you!
Load More Replies...
Creepy and illegal are not a completely over lapping venn diagrams. Happening to meet someone you connect with and find out they are 18 is one thing. Targeting women that young is quite another, which seems to be what this person is doing.
no I’m 31 & I can’t even imagine going out with someone under 27 as to me it’s weird. Let alone an 18 year old. I mind being 18 omg! as a grown a*s woman if a man 4 years old than me now targeted me at 18 it’s disgusting. They may be legal but mentally still like a child.
Load More Replies... Complete creep. I was once the seventeen year old in this situation. We only talked while I was 17 but the day I graduated high school (a week or so after I turned 18) he started asking for more and more. This was all online though. I've always thought I was smarter than most people my age, but I sent him nude photos of me after I turned 18, and we would Skype. It didn't hit me until I was around 21 that we did not have a normal "long distance" relationship. I did all the talking, was the only one sending photos and he would praise how gorgeous I was, how mature I was, blah blah. When I broke things off with him I realized just how predatory it was (we had talked since I was 16), and I still got emails a few years after it all with him whining about missing me (read: not getting nude photos) and how he is a complete wreck without me, how talking to me was the only thing keeping him alive. I completely regret even interacting with him, and I worry pretty much everyday about the pictures
@Laura Lou, you were young and he groomed you. It is definitely not your fault. Please realize that. Good luck to you!
Load More Replies...
62
81