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Having access to reliable transportation is a big deal for teenagers. Many people living in larger cities take it for granted. However, if you live in a smaller town and don’t have your driver’s license, there’s no public transport running late at night, and there are no taxis or Ubers around, you pretty much have to get creative. You might end up relying on your or your friends’ parents to get around.
One anonymous mom, user Bringmetolife, asked the friendly Mumsnet online community for some impartial advice about a disagreement she and some other parents had. She shared how one mom kept picking up their teenagers late at night on weekends while they were out partying, but finally had enough. Now, the author said she’s unwilling to do the same because of how exhausting and inconvenient it is. So, she asked for the internet’s verdict. You’ll find the full story below. Bored Panda has reached out to Bringmetolife for further comment, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.
RELATED:
It’s natural for parents to want to keep their children safe. So, they might choose to drive them to and from parties by car
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
A mom asked the net whether she was unreasonable for not wanting to get up at night to pick up her daughter and her friends after they finish partying
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
Image source: bringmetolife
The mom later shared a little bit more context about everything
Being picked up might be convenient for the teenagers, but the adults are the ones sacrificing their rest and time
Image credits: Shane (not the actual photo)
No matter the problem, there are always different ways to solve it. On the record, safety is a major concern if your teenagers go out and stay out until late at night. So, naturally, many parents want to make sure that their kids are safe and get back home in one piece.
That instinct to keep them safe is what drives them to, well, drive long distances in the middle of the night to pick the teens up and then chauffeur them home. If you ever went partying in high school or university, it’s likely that your or your friends’ parents have driven you back at some point.
It’s convenient, safer, and cheaper for the teens. However, there are some downsides, too. Namely, that all of that convenience and cheapness comes at the cost of one determined parent’s time and energy.
Getting up in the middle of the night isn’t something that many people are willing to do after a long, grueling week at work. Of course, having a family means making sacrifices. But if you constantly mess up your sleep, you’ll get less rest, have less energy, you’ll concentrate worse, and your work and relationships will suffer.
So, it’s probably better to pay a bit more for pricy taxis than to constantly sacrifice good sleep and your health. Not only that, but parents can use this opportunity to encourage their kids to be more independent and responsible.
For instance, if the teens plan to go partying, they could pay for the cabs back home themselves. Or they could encourage some of the teenagers to get their driver’s license, so that one of them could be the designated driver for the rest of the group. Of course, there should be absolutely no getting behind the wheel whatsoever if the person has consumed any alcohol. And remember, you don’t need to drink to have fun.
Sleep deprivation is a very serious problem that affects your physical and mental health
Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)
According to the Cleveland Clinic, missing even as little as 1.5 hours of sleep can impact how you feel. This can cause one to develop short-term problems, from a lack of alertness and moodiness to memory problems, and an inability or unwillingness to participate in normal daily activities.
“During periods of sleeplessness, hidden health hazards accumulate that can’t be covered up with concealer or reversed with caffeine. Everything from your cardiovascular system to your immune system feels the impact,” sleep medicine specialist Dr. Nancy Foldvary-Schaefer explains.
Poor sleep means more fatigue, while chronic sleeplessness can lead to mood disorders like depression or anxiety. If you don’t sleep properly, you’re more forgetful, your reaction times suffer, and you can even get blurred vision. You need around 7 to 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep each night, but this number can be greater or smaller depending on the individual. As per Dr. Foldvary-Schaefer, deep sleep allows your brain to clear the toxins that accumulate during your waking hours. Failing to do that can lead to neurodegenerative diseases. One example of this is Alzheimer’s.
On top of all of that, not getting enough sleep means that you’re negatively impacting your immune system, making you more susceptible to falling ill, as well as increasing your recovery time. Meanwhile, you’re also more at risk of developing cardiovascular disease, hormonal issues, and generally being more stressed.
The proverbial cherry (of doom) on top? Sleep deprivation and exhaustion increase your risk of getting into car accidents. Referring to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration report, the Cleveland Clinic notes that driving after 20 hours of sleep is like driving with a blood alcohol content of 0.08% (that’s the legal limit in many US states). Drowsy driving leads to thousands of crashes every year.
What’s your take on the entire situation, dear Pandas? Would you be willing to consistently get up in the middle of the night to bring back your kids and their friends from a club? How would you balance safety and convenience? How do you stay safe on the road at night? Let us know in the comments.
Here’s how the internet reacted to the story. Many readers thought the mom wasn’t being unreasonable, and they called out the teenagers
A few parents said that they’d pick up the kids just for the element of safety
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What do you think ?
Bailey 10 months ago
If you are old enough to go to clubs, you are old enough to take responsibility for getting home. A £60 taxi split between 4 for a night out is not an extreme expense to factor into planning.
Weltschmerz 10 months ago
I was going out clubbing at the age of 16 and had to get taxis or buses at that age sometimes on my own into our city which is 5 1/2 miles away. 18 is definitely old enough to be sorting yourself out!
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My O My 10 months ago
Why don't the girls take rotas of being the drivers. You know, they you do it. One stays sober and is the driver for this night.
Tamra 10 months ago
Sounds like a lot of nonsense. Maybe the young women can cut back the partying to one weekend per month, and save up money for a taxi. If they're old enough to go out drinking, they need to learn the responsibility/cost of getting where they need to go safely. Also, do these women only have one parent each? Where are the fathers?
Binky Melnik 10 months ago
Given they weren’t mentioned or even hinted at, I’d say it’s safe to say the fathers have nothing to do with this, either because they’re not in the picture or because they’re smart, thinking the kids need to work this out on their own.
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Upstaged75 10 months ago
The whole thing is ridiculous. The girls don't NEED to go clubbing at all. And if they're old enough to drink they're old enough to arrange a ride.
Deborah B 10 months ago
Make it a condition of going out that they have a pre-booked and pre-paid cab organised. If they're old enough to drink, they're old enough to pay for a cab. Having parents pick you up at 3 am is an emergency measure only. You want them to be getting in the habit of planning and budgeting for their own safety and transport in advance, while they're still living at home. If they go off to uni, and all of a sudden a night out is costing £15 more, it's easy for them to think "well, can't afford that everytime" and put themselves at risk. Establish good habits while you still have the chance to influence them.
Marianne 10 months ago
I would definitely pick up my child in an emergency at any time. However, a taxi company where all the drivers are personally known to the family really seems safe enough. I wouldn't want to spend the night driving around when there is a reasonable other option available.
Nadine Debard 10 months ago
I 've been the daughter and my friend's mom did the pickup (the alternative was that we came back walking, it was only 5 km but not a safe place to be at night). My parents didn't take turns for whatever reason, but I am still thankful to that mom. We didn't consider taxi because, you know, a girl at night alone with a man. But we went clubbing maximum every other month, not twice a month! Where do they find the money? I think the girls should take responsibility, stop abusing of the parents time and sleep and find a way to go out a bit less. It would be much more acceptable for the other moms (and dads!).
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Walking alone seems more dangerous than being in a car with a man. The same man could stop on the road. Why wouldn't you all go together and stay at one place?
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Sarah Jan Kelly 10 months ago
I would have NEVER expected my parents or friends’ parents to facilitate my clubbing. Honestly would have been mortified for any of them to see me after a night of drinking—very much a “don’t ask don’t tell” kind of situation. If you are old enough to go out partying you are old enough to not need your parents to facilitate it. If the parents don’t think sharing a taxi is safe at 3 am, how do they think being in the club is safe?! Isn’t being drugged and SA’d more of a risk in the club than in a taxi?
sturmwesen 10 months ago
We have arranged our own transport in all my teenage years. We either used the bus, or (later) had a driver organized. When we had neither WE paid for taxis. Guess the girls will have to work 2 hours extra for the taxi.
Bean Driller 10 months ago
This is so unreal. These kids can take turns being the designated driver. Be responsible adults. I have offered to pick my kids up at any time without consequence if they really needed a ride, but that was like 10 years ago. I only had to do it twice.
Christos Arvanitis 10 months ago
Maybe it's a different culture or something but my takeaway is a group of parents seemingly supporting young-barely-women at 18 getting hammered on the regular. It just doesn't seem safe. I dunno. These kids (that's that they are. they've been adults for about 5 minutes) perhaps ought to figure out how to not drink their cab fare home.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Or they could rotate DD. One sober night every few months is what we did before Uber.
Load More Replies... Secret Squirrel 10 months ago
Just stay in the city and drive each way. If you don't know anyone, one s****y Airbnb or motel room will probably be about the same as taxi plus gas money for the ride in. If they are really going twice monthly, they will have made friends enough to get some recommendations at least. Besides, is it really clubbing if you aren't going to an after party?
Bobert Robertson 10 months ago
This is insane to me... "i can't imagine anything worse than not being able to get drunk myself and having to pick up drunk teens" and "i let these teens drink, drink, drink at my house, pub, and club, but then want nothing to do with making sure they get home" sounds like poor parenting all around. At 18 they shouldn't be solely focused on getting wasted and this mom is encouraging it, but sounds like she's a drunk too needing 3 glasses of wine every Saturday and not being willing to give that up for her daughter. Also wtf is with redditors calling everyone dd, dh, ds, etc?
Josephine Blogs 10 months ago
It's not taken from Reddit, it's from Mumsnet. If you ask me it's quite sickening. But it's like this... DD: Dear Daughter DS: Dear Son DH: Dear Husband DW: Dear Wife DP: Dear Partner
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Je L 10 months ago
I would have been so embarrassed at 18 if my dad messaged other parents to organise pick ups after a night out. We were just left to it, managed ti organise it all ourselves, parents were only called if we were really stuck, if you're old enough to drink you should be able to organise your journey home.
Janelle Collard 10 months ago
I'd tell my kid: I'll come to get you at midnight. If you + your friends not ready to go, you can get yourselves home. There are FOUR kids, 18 or older. Time to start taking care of their own stuff. I was getting myself to + from high school + my job when I was 16.
tori Ohno 10 months ago
This story is ridiculous! If they can't afford a ride home, then they can't afford to go out. Period! And as an American, why are teenagers going out and getting drunk every weekend? It's irresponsible even for adults to do that.
Debbie 10 months ago
So poor people should stay home and never have fun? A Cab here would cost about 40 euro. A trip from me with the car would cost about what, 3 euro? That's a huge difference.
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Gavin Johnson 10 months ago
Do the maths. Three families can do taxi duty, one can’t due to a full time commitment. That leaves six parents. They go clubbing every two weeks. So the actual involvement runs to roughly 4 trips per year. C’mon now, that’s not exactly giving up your life is it? Each daughter should simply discuss it with their parents and get organised. OR Accept that taxis are part of the expense of a night out and suck it up.
Verena 10 months ago
If you get kids you need to factor that in. Especially when living somewhere without reliable transport. My dad was always okay with getting us. He loved a good wine, too, but me more. After the majority of my friends got their driving licences (here only at 18!), one of us usually could lend the car of their parents and of course did not drink. Seen that these girls can only party when alcohol is involved (pre-drinking????), this might not be a viable plan.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 9 months ago
These are fully grown adults, yes? Why the f**k are their mums sorting this out?
weatherwitch 9 months ago
Where the hell are the fathers in all of this?? The girls are Extremely lucky to be able to go out so often and until So late. I would've been strung up if I'd got home beyond midnight!!! I wasn't allowed clubbing or to go to pubs 18 or not, they have to be sensible and both find somewhere Much nearer and go much less often to.Save the best place for 3 or 6 monthly visits. I'm not going to blame the girls for this. Everyone of them has a mum who's agreed this time, 3am to come home is absolutely fine. Again nothing from the fathers. This has led the girls to believe this is fine and acceptable behaviour. Next, one mum. One brilliant mum wanting the very best safety for her child and the others children too has put herself out there to do this Insane run multiple times, like a selfless mum who is only thinking of her daughter. She needs to think of Herself. The other mums have either been pretty selfish in letting her do this or not giving a s**t about their kids safety. DBS Taxi 🚖
Pixie T 9 months ago
When my sister and I were old enough to go clubbing our mum always made us have £20 extra in a separate part of our purses / bags and that was purely for cabs only. If for any reason we didn't have that money by the end of the night or cab fare was more then, there was always £50 kitty under the umbrella stand in our entrance hall. She made sure we'd always be able to pay for cabs no matter what.
Tracy Rieon Hall 10 months ago
If they're teenagers under 21 why tf are you allowing this? I'm not gonna get out of my sleep to go and pick up teenagers from partying and drinking they can catch an Uber home or they can rotate who's gonna drive. I'm not trying to be funny just being real no one will ever monopolize my free time because they're doing something stupid and can't drive home. If they choose to be stupid let them find their own way home. OP go out and enjoy your life just like they're doing instead of being their personal taxi
RageOfAquarius 10 months ago
Was I the only one who struggled with all the acronyms? I usually figure them out, but it took me until the end to get AIBU and I still don't get the others.
Foxglove🇮🇪 10 months ago
It can be a bit of a chore, but I'd rather pick up my daughter and her friends at 3am to ensure they get home safe, than risk something happening. (I'll go to bed and set the alarm) but the other families all take their turns. We don't have public transport at night and taxis are scarce so driving is the only option.
K Barnes 10 months ago
I can see that being really nice as a once off or special occasion thing, but not a regular thing for something as completely unnecessary and risky as going out drinking all the time. Going out drinking it a high risk activity that is not necessary. If you want to go out and get wasted you need to take care of yourself. Parents shouldn't enable that kind of behaviour by driving their wasted kids around at 3am on a regular basis, IMO.
Load More Replies... MegDragon 10 months ago
The unhappy mom from group chat needs to redirect her frustration to the kids who think they are entitled to party wherever they like best and until whatever time of night and call mommy like she’s a taxi. This is the kind of conflict that comes from 12 year olds sleepovers. These young adults figure out their own transportation or they don’t get wasted in another town every week.
Papa 10 months ago
For some reason this reminded me of what my father told me when I first started going out at night. "If you fool around and get in trouble, don't call me in the middle of the night to come bail you out of jail. You sit there until the next morning, and then call me and I'll come." By the way, in case I wasn't clear, that was absolutely the right thing to say.
Michael MacKinnon 10 months ago
From Northern Ontario, here: 13 miles is the next town from the one I grew up in, the only one with more than one bar. Parental pick-up is reasonable.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
I'm from a similar place, more reasonable to drive yourselves and take turns being sober than to ask parents to if it's a regular thing.
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Imma 10 months ago
I'm conflicted about this. My parents always said (when I was younger) that "They chose to have children and thus not drink alcohol to be able to drive when needed." For example when me or any of my siblings get to drunk, miss the bus or something else. Even when we were kids, they didn't drink in case something happened. But even if they were able to always pick me up I never even ask them, just because I wanted to go clubbing and maybe even not coming home late (often I went for the "stranger danger", in hindsight pretty dumb, but nothing to bad happened) doesn't mean they wanted to stay up way over their bedtime. But I think that mom is a champ, and I kind of understand that she just want the girls to be safe. But I dunno what is best to do here.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Prebook the taxi, £50 between four is just part of the cost of going out. But please, you can't think of anything worse? Stop being melodramatic. You don't want to drive, fine, but don't pretend it's actual hardship.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Depending on OP's job, getting up or staying up until 3am in order to make a 60-minute round trip drive to pick up three drunk adult children (and presumably drop off the other two that aren't OP's daughter) may actually BE a hardship to OP. Humans require consistent sleep. Humans do not require clubbing.
Load More Replies... Debbie 10 months ago
When I was 16 (yes, 16, times have changed) we went to a club/disco what was not really reachable by bus. Taxi's were expensive, entrance and drinks not so much (we also didn't drink that much). Our parents gladly dropped us off and picked us up. They knew we were only at that location and not other bars. They would not sleep otherwise untill we were home safely, so usually one of the parents did the driving. Here in the Netherlands it is not that necessary that you get your drivers license right away at 18, you can get around without quite well. If my kids would have a drivers licence I'd still pick them up if it's just once a month or once every two months, is that so hard? I would expect them to return the favour - if I'd want to have some drinks on an outing, then they should also be willing to be the designated driver occasionally.
Roberta Surprenant 10 months ago
At 18 I was married and making babies. They need to take responsibility for themselves instead of counti g on mommy.
Bobert Robertson 10 months ago
Starting with the one true alcoholic - mom. Can't be bothered to not drink on a Saturday to ensure her daughter is safe.
Load More Replies... Bailey 10 months ago
If you are old enough to go to clubs, you are old enough to take responsibility for getting home. A £60 taxi split between 4 for a night out is not an extreme expense to factor into planning.
Weltschmerz 10 months ago
I was going out clubbing at the age of 16 and had to get taxis or buses at that age sometimes on my own into our city which is 5 1/2 miles away. 18 is definitely old enough to be sorting yourself out!
Load More Replies... My O My 10 months ago
Why don't the girls take rotas of being the drivers. You know, they you do it. One stays sober and is the driver for this night.
Tamra 10 months ago
Sounds like a lot of nonsense. Maybe the young women can cut back the partying to one weekend per month, and save up money for a taxi. If they're old enough to go out drinking, they need to learn the responsibility/cost of getting where they need to go safely. Also, do these women only have one parent each? Where are the fathers?
Binky Melnik 10 months ago
Given they weren’t mentioned or even hinted at, I’d say it’s safe to say the fathers have nothing to do with this, either because they’re not in the picture or because they’re smart, thinking the kids need to work this out on their own.
Load More Replies... Upstaged75 10 months ago
The whole thing is ridiculous. The girls don't NEED to go clubbing at all. And if they're old enough to drink they're old enough to arrange a ride.
Deborah B 10 months ago
Make it a condition of going out that they have a pre-booked and pre-paid cab organised. If they're old enough to drink, they're old enough to pay for a cab. Having parents pick you up at 3 am is an emergency measure only. You want them to be getting in the habit of planning and budgeting for their own safety and transport in advance, while they're still living at home. If they go off to uni, and all of a sudden a night out is costing £15 more, it's easy for them to think "well, can't afford that everytime" and put themselves at risk. Establish good habits while you still have the chance to influence them.
Marianne 10 months ago
I would definitely pick up my child in an emergency at any time. However, a taxi company where all the drivers are personally known to the family really seems safe enough. I wouldn't want to spend the night driving around when there is a reasonable other option available.
Nadine Debard 10 months ago
I 've been the daughter and my friend's mom did the pickup (the alternative was that we came back walking, it was only 5 km but not a safe place to be at night). My parents didn't take turns for whatever reason, but I am still thankful to that mom. We didn't consider taxi because, you know, a girl at night alone with a man. But we went clubbing maximum every other month, not twice a month! Where do they find the money? I think the girls should take responsibility, stop abusing of the parents time and sleep and find a way to go out a bit less. It would be much more acceptable for the other moms (and dads!).
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Walking alone seems more dangerous than being in a car with a man. The same man could stop on the road. Why wouldn't you all go together and stay at one place?
Load More Replies... Sarah Jan Kelly 10 months ago
I would have NEVER expected my parents or friends’ parents to facilitate my clubbing. Honestly would have been mortified for any of them to see me after a night of drinking—very much a “don’t ask don’t tell” kind of situation. If you are old enough to go out partying you are old enough to not need your parents to facilitate it. If the parents don’t think sharing a taxi is safe at 3 am, how do they think being in the club is safe?! Isn’t being drugged and SA’d more of a risk in the club than in a taxi?
sturmwesen 10 months ago
We have arranged our own transport in all my teenage years. We either used the bus, or (later) had a driver organized. When we had neither WE paid for taxis. Guess the girls will have to work 2 hours extra for the taxi.
Bean Driller 10 months ago
This is so unreal. These kids can take turns being the designated driver. Be responsible adults. I have offered to pick my kids up at any time without consequence if they really needed a ride, but that was like 10 years ago. I only had to do it twice.
Christos Arvanitis 10 months ago
Maybe it's a different culture or something but my takeaway is a group of parents seemingly supporting young-barely-women at 18 getting hammered on the regular. It just doesn't seem safe. I dunno. These kids (that's that they are. they've been adults for about 5 minutes) perhaps ought to figure out how to not drink their cab fare home.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Or they could rotate DD. One sober night every few months is what we did before Uber.
Load More Replies... Secret Squirrel 10 months ago
Just stay in the city and drive each way. If you don't know anyone, one s****y Airbnb or motel room will probably be about the same as taxi plus gas money for the ride in. If they are really going twice monthly, they will have made friends enough to get some recommendations at least. Besides, is it really clubbing if you aren't going to an after party?
Bobert Robertson 10 months ago
This is insane to me... "i can't imagine anything worse than not being able to get drunk myself and having to pick up drunk teens" and "i let these teens drink, drink, drink at my house, pub, and club, but then want nothing to do with making sure they get home" sounds like poor parenting all around. At 18 they shouldn't be solely focused on getting wasted and this mom is encouraging it, but sounds like she's a drunk too needing 3 glasses of wine every Saturday and not being willing to give that up for her daughter. Also wtf is with redditors calling everyone dd, dh, ds, etc?
Josephine Blogs 10 months ago
It's not taken from Reddit, it's from Mumsnet. If you ask me it's quite sickening. But it's like this... DD: Dear Daughter DS: Dear Son DH: Dear Husband DW: Dear Wife DP: Dear Partner
Load More Replies... Je L 10 months ago
I would have been so embarrassed at 18 if my dad messaged other parents to organise pick ups after a night out. We were just left to it, managed ti organise it all ourselves, parents were only called if we were really stuck, if you're old enough to drink you should be able to organise your journey home.
Janelle Collard 10 months ago
I'd tell my kid: I'll come to get you at midnight. If you + your friends not ready to go, you can get yourselves home. There are FOUR kids, 18 or older. Time to start taking care of their own stuff. I was getting myself to + from high school + my job when I was 16.
tori Ohno 10 months ago
This story is ridiculous! If they can't afford a ride home, then they can't afford to go out. Period! And as an American, why are teenagers going out and getting drunk every weekend? It's irresponsible even for adults to do that.
Debbie 10 months ago
So poor people should stay home and never have fun? A Cab here would cost about 40 euro. A trip from me with the car would cost about what, 3 euro? That's a huge difference.
Load More Replies... Gavin Johnson 10 months ago
Do the maths. Three families can do taxi duty, one can’t due to a full time commitment. That leaves six parents. They go clubbing every two weeks. So the actual involvement runs to roughly 4 trips per year. C’mon now, that’s not exactly giving up your life is it? Each daughter should simply discuss it with their parents and get organised. OR Accept that taxis are part of the expense of a night out and suck it up.
Verena 10 months ago
If you get kids you need to factor that in. Especially when living somewhere without reliable transport. My dad was always okay with getting us. He loved a good wine, too, but me more. After the majority of my friends got their driving licences (here only at 18!), one of us usually could lend the car of their parents and of course did not drink. Seen that these girls can only party when alcohol is involved (pre-drinking????), this might not be a viable plan.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 9 months ago
These are fully grown adults, yes? Why the f**k are their mums sorting this out?
weatherwitch 9 months ago
Where the hell are the fathers in all of this?? The girls are Extremely lucky to be able to go out so often and until So late. I would've been strung up if I'd got home beyond midnight!!! I wasn't allowed clubbing or to go to pubs 18 or not, they have to be sensible and both find somewhere Much nearer and go much less often to.Save the best place for 3 or 6 monthly visits. I'm not going to blame the girls for this. Everyone of them has a mum who's agreed this time, 3am to come home is absolutely fine. Again nothing from the fathers. This has led the girls to believe this is fine and acceptable behaviour. Next, one mum. One brilliant mum wanting the very best safety for her child and the others children too has put herself out there to do this Insane run multiple times, like a selfless mum who is only thinking of her daughter. She needs to think of Herself. The other mums have either been pretty selfish in letting her do this or not giving a s**t about their kids safety. DBS Taxi 🚖
Pixie T 9 months ago
When my sister and I were old enough to go clubbing our mum always made us have £20 extra in a separate part of our purses / bags and that was purely for cabs only. If for any reason we didn't have that money by the end of the night or cab fare was more then, there was always £50 kitty under the umbrella stand in our entrance hall. She made sure we'd always be able to pay for cabs no matter what.
Tracy Rieon Hall 10 months ago
If they're teenagers under 21 why tf are you allowing this? I'm not gonna get out of my sleep to go and pick up teenagers from partying and drinking they can catch an Uber home or they can rotate who's gonna drive. I'm not trying to be funny just being real no one will ever monopolize my free time because they're doing something stupid and can't drive home. If they choose to be stupid let them find their own way home. OP go out and enjoy your life just like they're doing instead of being their personal taxi
RageOfAquarius 10 months ago
Was I the only one who struggled with all the acronyms? I usually figure them out, but it took me until the end to get AIBU and I still don't get the others.
Foxglove🇮🇪 10 months ago
It can be a bit of a chore, but I'd rather pick up my daughter and her friends at 3am to ensure they get home safe, than risk something happening. (I'll go to bed and set the alarm) but the other families all take their turns. We don't have public transport at night and taxis are scarce so driving is the only option.
K Barnes 10 months ago
I can see that being really nice as a once off or special occasion thing, but not a regular thing for something as completely unnecessary and risky as going out drinking all the time. Going out drinking it a high risk activity that is not necessary. If you want to go out and get wasted you need to take care of yourself. Parents shouldn't enable that kind of behaviour by driving their wasted kids around at 3am on a regular basis, IMO.
Load More Replies... MegDragon 10 months ago
The unhappy mom from group chat needs to redirect her frustration to the kids who think they are entitled to party wherever they like best and until whatever time of night and call mommy like she’s a taxi. This is the kind of conflict that comes from 12 year olds sleepovers. These young adults figure out their own transportation or they don’t get wasted in another town every week.
Papa 10 months ago
For some reason this reminded me of what my father told me when I first started going out at night. "If you fool around and get in trouble, don't call me in the middle of the night to come bail you out of jail. You sit there until the next morning, and then call me and I'll come." By the way, in case I wasn't clear, that was absolutely the right thing to say.
Michael MacKinnon 10 months ago
From Northern Ontario, here: 13 miles is the next town from the one I grew up in, the only one with more than one bar. Parental pick-up is reasonable.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
I'm from a similar place, more reasonable to drive yourselves and take turns being sober than to ask parents to if it's a regular thing.
Load More Replies... Imma 10 months ago
I'm conflicted about this. My parents always said (when I was younger) that "They chose to have children and thus not drink alcohol to be able to drive when needed." For example when me or any of my siblings get to drunk, miss the bus or something else. Even when we were kids, they didn't drink in case something happened. But even if they were able to always pick me up I never even ask them, just because I wanted to go clubbing and maybe even not coming home late (often I went for the "stranger danger", in hindsight pretty dumb, but nothing to bad happened) doesn't mean they wanted to stay up way over their bedtime. But I think that mom is a champ, and I kind of understand that she just want the girls to be safe. But I dunno what is best to do here.
FreeTheUnicorn 10 months ago
Prebook the taxi, £50 between four is just part of the cost of going out. But please, you can't think of anything worse? Stop being melodramatic. You don't want to drive, fine, but don't pretend it's actual hardship.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 10 months ago
Depending on OP's job, getting up or staying up until 3am in order to make a 60-minute round trip drive to pick up three drunk adult children (and presumably drop off the other two that aren't OP's daughter) may actually BE a hardship to OP. Humans require consistent sleep. Humans do not require clubbing.
Load More Replies... Debbie 10 months ago
When I was 16 (yes, 16, times have changed) we went to a club/disco what was not really reachable by bus. Taxi's were expensive, entrance and drinks not so much (we also didn't drink that much). Our parents gladly dropped us off and picked us up. They knew we were only at that location and not other bars. They would not sleep otherwise untill we were home safely, so usually one of the parents did the driving. Here in the Netherlands it is not that necessary that you get your drivers license right away at 18, you can get around without quite well. If my kids would have a drivers licence I'd still pick them up if it's just once a month or once every two months, is that so hard? I would expect them to return the favour - if I'd want to have some drinks on an outing, then they should also be willing to be the designated driver occasionally.
Roberta Surprenant 10 months ago
At 18 I was married and making babies. They need to take responsibility for themselves instead of counti g on mommy.
Bobert Robertson 10 months ago
Starting with the one true alcoholic - mom. Can't be bothered to not drink on a Saturday to ensure her daughter is safe.
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