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MOH Unwilling To Book An Airbnb Before Every Participant Chips In Upfront, Wonders If She’s A Jerk
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MOH Unwilling To Book An Airbnb Before Every Participant Chips In Upfront, Wonders If She’s A Jerk

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If a wedding for newlyweds is meant to be one of the happiest days of their lives, then for those around, it sometimes becomes a difficult test. In the end, you need help with choosing a wedding venue, organizing a bachelor and bachelorette party… any stage of organizing a wedding can bring something new, and this new one will not always be pleasant.

For example, the heroine of the story that we are going to tell you today, the user u/Bbbbananaaa, once also organized a bachelorette party for her friend and, probably, thereby discouraged herself from organizing anything in the future for a long time. So just read our tale and judge for yourself.

The author of the post was once invited to be the maid of honor for her close friend’s wedding

Image credits: Caleb Oquendo(not the actual photo) 

The bride wanted to have a bachelorette party out of town, so the MOH had to book an Airbnb

Image credits: u/Bbbbananaaa

However, when it all came to booking, many participants started shirking from chipping in, vowing to pay later

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo) 

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Image credits: u/Bbbbananaaa

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo) 

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Image credits: u/Bbbbananaaa

The MOH ended up saying she either expects others to pay upfront, or won’t book anything

The Original Poster (OP) says that she organized a bachelorette party on the eve of her friend’s wedding. The bride got the idea to do a getaway trip to a nearby town, so the bridesmaids set up a dedicated group chat to discuss everything. As we said, the author of the post was in charge of the entire party, so it was a matter of course that she would book an Airbnb for everyone. And here comes the issue…

Usually problems in such situations happen for three main reasons: love affairs, money and ordinary human entitlement. In our story, thank God, there was no first reason, but the last two were involved to the maximum. So, when it came time to book the Airbnb, it turned out that many of the chat participants had not chipped in for a variety of reasons. Some vowed to pay later, another complained about a delay in wages – basically, you yourself can roughly imagine how it all happens.

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This is how the OP faced the dubious prospect of paying for the booking almost entirely with her own money. And she reasonably feared that she would not get it back later – firstly, she just didn’t know some of the participants of the upcoming party in person, and secondly, some of them hadn’t even RSVP’d yet. As a result, the original poster simply wrote that she was refusing to book the Airbnb until everyone confirmed their participation and gave her money.

Of course, after this, the author of the post faced serious pressure from the other bridesmaids, who were afraid that they would end up missing the reservation. But the original poster was absolutely adamant in her decision, just not wanting to risk her money. And she defended her decision, despite the ever-increasing criticism…

Image credits: Melike Benli (not the actual photo) 

Traditionally, the MOH does take the brunt of organizing the bachelorette party, but this in no way means that she has to pay for everything on her own account. “If your bachelorette weekend takes place in another city, it’s only fair to split costs for transportation, entertainment, and lodging evenly among the entire guest list – bride included. Many times, the MOH or bridal party will pick up the tab for certain expenses, like decorations, booze and snacks for Airbnb, or bachelorette T-shirts,” party planning website The Bach reasonably notes.

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“Often, the closest friend or relative of the bride is chosen as the maid of honor, that is, the person whom the bride-to-be trusts the most,” says Denis Tsykanovsky, a wedding host from Tel Aviv, Israel, with whom Bored Panda got in touch for a comment here. “But this, of course, does not mean that the MOH funds absolutely everything during the preparation for the bachelorette party. Especially since in this story all the participants agreed in advance to split the booking costs.”

“There are situations when some guests come from afar, and if the MOH is completely unfamiliar with them, then trying to get her money returned from a stranger from another city or even another state – you see, it does not look very promising. So the fears of the heroine of this story are quite understandable, especially since some invitees haven’t even RSVP’d yet. Maybe it’s a lack of faith in people, but at the end of the day, if you’re getting ready to attend someone’s wedding, you need to prepare in advance and save money, don’t you?” Denis wonders.

Well, it must be admitted that many commenters also lack faith in human selflessness, and simply praise the original poster for being smart and careful here. “You’re being very smart because I promise you somebody wouldn’t pay,” one of the folks in the comments wrote. After all, if the rest of the bridesmaids are so concerned about securing the booking, why don’t they pay at their own expense, several other commenters were wondering at once.

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However, even a successful booking is far from a guarantee that the bachelorette party itself will be perfect. In the end, as we now know, there can always be a situation where one of the guests, with the approval of the bride-to-be, starts, for example, pitching a MLM scheme… And if you’ve also happened to encounter something similar at your or someone else’s wedding, we’re looking forward to your own fascinating and wholesome stories in the comments below this post.

People in the comments mostly sided with the author, praising her for being smart and cautious

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tcypxhxdrplhqxmdct avatar
Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I organised my own stag do and stumped up the money for everyone, they paid me back when they could afford it (all within 3 months), I certainly wouldn't have expected someone else to organise or stump up the money for people they didn't know.

jldrumm avatar
Captain McSmoot
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"INFO"?!?! Really?! Someone up in the comments of the story asked for info. It doesn't matter what the policy is; this nice lady would be stuck with the bill regardless of the policies set in place. If you use the deadline the policy gives you to pressure them to pay then, they'll still find an excuse to not pay. Unless one of the policies is "We'll hunt down the people who haven't paid for you so you don't have to", then policies are irrelevant. Oh, and if you're planning on cancelling the rooms of all those who haven't paid when the time comes, brace yourself for some otherworldly drama, hon.

sonja_6 avatar
Sonja
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They ask because then OP could book it so it's not lost, but can cancel it without losing money if people don't pay at the promised date and say so. And I love the white lie of the other commenter: saying up front that you can't give the full amount or cover for anyone because you only have enough money for your own share and oh so sorry, I'd love to, but I can't. So please pay up or I can't reserve and you wouldn't ruin the brides bachelor trip by being cheap, would you? Turn it right around on them first so they can't use the usual guilt tripping against you. And if they try anyway you can always say: hey! I told you I can't foot the bill! You knew that! You didn't pay me and you knew I'd have to cancel!

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tcypxhxdrplhqxmdct avatar
Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I organised my own stag do and stumped up the money for everyone, they paid me back when they could afford it (all within 3 months), I certainly wouldn't have expected someone else to organise or stump up the money for people they didn't know.

jldrumm avatar
Captain McSmoot
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"INFO"?!?! Really?! Someone up in the comments of the story asked for info. It doesn't matter what the policy is; this nice lady would be stuck with the bill regardless of the policies set in place. If you use the deadline the policy gives you to pressure them to pay then, they'll still find an excuse to not pay. Unless one of the policies is "We'll hunt down the people who haven't paid for you so you don't have to", then policies are irrelevant. Oh, and if you're planning on cancelling the rooms of all those who haven't paid when the time comes, brace yourself for some otherworldly drama, hon.

sonja_6 avatar
Sonja
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They ask because then OP could book it so it's not lost, but can cancel it without losing money if people don't pay at the promised date and say so. And I love the white lie of the other commenter: saying up front that you can't give the full amount or cover for anyone because you only have enough money for your own share and oh so sorry, I'd love to, but I can't. So please pay up or I can't reserve and you wouldn't ruin the brides bachelor trip by being cheap, would you? Turn it right around on them first so they can't use the usual guilt tripping against you. And if they try anyway you can always say: hey! I told you I can't foot the bill! You knew that! You didn't pay me and you knew I'd have to cancel!

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