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Woman Expresses Hurt For Being Constantly Excluded In Couple Events, BF Lashes Out At her
Woman upset on couch as boyfriend stands holding suitcase, highlighting trust issues in couples trip situation.
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Woman Expresses Hurt For Being Constantly Excluded In Couple Events, BF Lashes Out At her

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It’s normal for couples to have the occasional time away from each other. Experts encourage couples to strike a balance between “me” and “we” to help promote a healthier, longer-lasting relationship

This man, however, seemed to have taken that concept a bit too far. He had been leaving his girlfriend out of planned activities with other couples, which the woman felt was intentional. And when she spoke up, he instead lashed out, saying she needed to “get a life.” 

The woman has since been doubtful about the state of their relationship as she vented her frustrations online. 

RELATED:

    Experts encourage couples to have the occasional time apart to promote a healthy, thriving relationship

    Image credits: armmypicca / freepik (not the actual photo)

    This woman, however, felt her boyfriend had been trying to leave her out of couples’ activities

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    Image credits: Camandona / freepik (not the actual photo)

    She finally spoke out, only to be yelled at 

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    Image credits: jordicarnesanxhez / freepik (not the actual photo)

    She clarified some details in her story and stated why she was feeling confused by her partner’s actions

    Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / freepik (not the actual photo)

    The woman also explained why she felt she wasn’t being unreasonable

    Image credits: Frolopiaton Palm / freepik (not the actual photo)

    Feeling that her partner’s actions were intentional, the author has begun to doubt the state of their relationship

    Image credits: Anonconfused3983

    Intentionally leaving out a partner is a sign of a deeper relationship problem

    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

    If the man’s actions were, indeed, intentional, the relationship may require deeper evaluation. According to Aspen Counseling and Wellness’s lead therapist, Dr. Bernadette Smith, leaving out a partner could indicate a fear of judgment, a lack of awareness regarding its emotional impact, or dissatisfaction in the relationship. 

    Licensed therapist Joseph Pumilia says it could be due to the desire to “avoid hard conversations” to “protect” the partner’s feelings. 

    “Real empathy isn’t about avoidance—it’s about having the tough conversations and trying to genuinely understand each other,” he told Bored Panda.

    The woman also denied being the clingy girlfriend that some may have perceived her to be. However, Dr. Smith also clarified that clinginess is a sign of unmet needs. 

    “Sometimes this surfaces due to the relationship dynamics or is rooted in previous life experiences, which were carried into the relationship,” she explained. However, she also clarified that the constant dismissal of a significant other’s desire to be included could indicate a pattern of intentional exclusion. 

    So, how can someone who is constantly excluded effectively express their feelings? Both Dr. Smith and Pumilia suggest engaging in honest conversations using “I” statements. They emphasized that the goal should be to understand and make each other feel heard, to help begin the process of growth and healing. 

    Meanwhile, relationship therapist Rich Heller suggests a more direct approach: “Don’t chase down each incident. Call out the pattern.” 

    “If it doesn’t change, you’ve learned something essential about the relationship, like you probably don’t want to be in it,” he said. 

    It’s bad enough that the author experienced harsh gaslighting after expressing her feelings. She may need to rethink the relationship and whether or not it is worth pursuing.

    People in the comments believe she would be better off breaking up with him

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    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

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    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, Community member

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    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

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    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, Community member

    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    Rugilė Žemaitytė

    Rugilė Žemaitytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    As a Visual Editor at Bored Panda, my favorite part of the job involves browsing the web for the cutest cat pics, the funniest memes and eye-catching illustrations to brighten up your day!

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    Rugilė Žemaitytė

    Rugilė Žemaitytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    As a Visual Editor at Bored Panda, my favorite part of the job involves browsing the web for the cutest cat pics, the funniest memes and eye-catching illustrations to brighten up your day!

    What do you think ?
    Blue Bunny of Happiness
    Community Member
    6 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need an update as to what she did, but I’m loving the response calling the boyfriend a “human tape worm”!

    MrsEgonSpengler
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She needs to lawyer up and get the house sold.

    Ellinor she/they/elle
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He hates her. OP is right to get away from him and even though she should have left earlier I'm still happy she finally realised what a [censored] he is.

    BeesEelsAndPups
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hate is probably a strong word for this situation. But he definitely doesn't want to spend time with her. I'd even be willing to guess that he works a night shift so he doesn't have to see her during the week. Probably best to sell the house and split the difference, and move on.

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    Blue Bunny of Happiness
    Community Member
    6 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need an update as to what she did, but I’m loving the response calling the boyfriend a “human tape worm”!

    MrsEgonSpengler
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She needs to lawyer up and get the house sold.

    Ellinor she/they/elle
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He hates her. OP is right to get away from him and even though she should have left earlier I'm still happy she finally realised what a [censored] he is.

    BeesEelsAndPups
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hate is probably a strong word for this situation. But he definitely doesn't want to spend time with her. I'd even be willing to guess that he works a night shift so he doesn't have to see her during the week. Probably best to sell the house and split the difference, and move on.

    Load More Replies...
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