35 Of The Craziest Conspiracies Based On Everyday Things That Might Freak You Out

It's a Corn-spiracy.

I KNEW it!!!!

Sounds legit

Lotekguy

Lotekguy

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Cows, pigs, turkeys and chickens are funding the ad campaign.

Bruh... you're right!!!

Definitely. It's always higher than average. Uhm your average needs to be adjusted then

They only have 1-2 live people that handle calls anymore. They expect everything to be managed by a phone tree.

The issue is they also include the hours that have effectively zero calls when factoring that. So yes, the volume is in fact above average... because they get maybe 2 calls an hour between the hours of 10PM and 6AM.

the thing is, they want you using aeroplane mode so that it doesn't interfere with the plane's communications and other instruments and systems

They'll usually tell you that you can report it on the internet or app instead. Which isn't helpful when your car has broken down in an area with poor data signal. Especially when it is -4C and you're alone.

And don't forget - every 15 seconds - "YOUR CALL IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US. PLEASE STAY ON THE LINE AND THE NEXT AVAILABLE SERVICE REPRESENTATIVE WILL BE WITH YOU SHORTLY". Then they go back to the scratchy music only to interrupt it again in another 15 seconds.

No. It's so your brain turns to mush, so when it's answered you can't think who you are or why you are calling. Instinctively going for a panicky overly polite please help me tone in the initial exchange. Now you are grateful for any help and less likely to be annoyed that you needed help in the first place. Like thank you so much for helping me solve the problem your company created.

When they loop it with an audible “kRrkK” so you wake up thinking now someone will talk to you … nope 😒

You can sometimes find youtube videos of the hold music that different companies use. Rickrolling with hold music is a fun activity....

Sucks for the relay folks

And what happens if I lick them? Do they loosen up?

Obviously they’re just sleeping trolls.

Pine trees are pining for their Mamas/Bookshelves.

STUPID.

Pet rocks are all soft and cuddly though. If yours isn't you need to cuddle it more. Or it might be jealous because you hve two.

Idk how but I can immediately understand this

The joke is on them. My budget is less less so I buy less more and less less.

This is may favorite one so far.

I can't stop laughing at this

You win. LOL

as a woman, i would rather carry a purse than put my things in pockets. i carry minimal items, like my phone, sunglasses, keys, money and driver's license and credit card. putting them all in my pockets, even if there were enough big pockets in my clothing, would be uncomfortable, and inconvenient for so many reasons.

I was mumbling the other day about wanting something like a "tactical skirt"..pockets, belt loops, etc. Well, apparently that's a thing and it's sold on a kilt website called "damn near kilt em". 🤣

It's especially annoying for people like me, who wear jeans from the woman's section and don't want to / can't wear a purse. It's such an annoying little detail, why do they do this?? Women also might not want to wear a purse, just make the pockets bigger already, it can't be that hard?

i think its because we were witches and they wanted to be able to find herbs we had but if they were in our pockets it would be a sin to touch a woman you aren't married to so they would make us have purses so they could check if we had spells with out being sinful. that's my conspiracy.

Maybe, but I don't need less pockets to want more totes.

I believe PETA started out with a good mission and became something like the conspiracy above.. it actually would make sense if true

Ace

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It's the only thing that coule realistically explain how stupid they are.

Janissary35680

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PETA also expands to "People Eating Tasty Animals". Coincidence? I think not.

Seems to me they’re doing an *excellent* job of making vegetarian/veganism look absurd, too! (Ack; I just said something nice about PETA. 😡 Lemme take it back, please?) (People need to be careful with these lest they accidentally convince the credulous to make to contributions! to questionable orgs!)

I'm missing something. Vegans/vegetarians don't eat meat. Isn't the fact they do not is kinder to animals?

The "our menu options have recently changed" thing is so f*****g stupid. Even if they really did recently change their menu options, who the f**k is memorizing menu options? We just want to talk to a real person, we're not taking notes and studying your stupid phone menu prompts.

PROBABLE lol

I design phone systems for a living (feel free to hate me). I will do my best to meet the customer's requests, but "menu recently changed" is a hard no.

“Recent past”? 🙄 You mean DISTANT past. Very, VERY distant past. Write down the options, store ‘em with your important après, and then when you find that paper in a few years, call the number and compare the current menu with what you wrote down. I promise it’ll be the same.