“He Isn’t A Good Egg”: People Urge Woman To Leave Husband After His Post-Wedding Change

Marriage doesn’t always work out, and we see that from almost half of all marriages today ending in divorce. What’s more, 57% of women admit to regretting marrying their husbands at one point in their lives. But what if you don’t even need to wait, and your husband suddenly changes his behavior right after the wedding?

That’s what happened to this woman: she claims her husband started insulting her, flirting with other women in front of her, and disrespecting her in other ways. It got to a point where she could bear no longer, so she decided to ask the Internet for advice.

A woman was baffled by her husband’s sudden personality change after the wedding

Woman looking distressed while her husband gestures in the background, showing relationship tension after their wedding.

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

Apparently, he started insulting her about her weight, flirting with waitresses, and disrespecting her in other ways

Woman says her husband has become a different person since their wedding, describing change in his behavior and personality.

Text from woman describing how her husband has become a different person since their wedding, including flirting on honeymoon.

Woman describing how her husband has become a different person since their wedding, feeling shocked and confused.

Text excerpt describing a woman noticing her husband becoming a different person since their wedding, hinting at changes in behavior.

Woman and two friends at bar, man smiling and engaged in conversation, illustrating changes in husband since wedding.

Image credits: mstandret / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Text excerpt showing a woman describing how her husband became a different person after their wedding, feeling shocked and uncertain.

Text excerpt describing a woman’s experience with her husband behaving like a different person after their wedding.

Text excerpt discussing a woman feeling unhappy as her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Alt text: A woman expresses how her husband has become a different person, causing struggles with weight and hurtful comments.

Woman says her husband has become a different person since their wedding, feeling judged during family celebration.

Text excerpt about a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding, describing recent events.

Man with beard and short hair wearing a yellow shirt, expressing frustration while talking to a woman, relationship conflict theme.

Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Alt text: Woman says her husband has become a different person and she does not recognize him anymore.

Image credits: ChemistryTricky6851

The woman also shared some alarming things that the husband did, hinting at domestic violence

Reddit post text from woman explaining her husband has become a different person since their wedding, reflecting on marriage changes.

Screenshot of an online discussion about a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Comment thread showing a woman describing how her husband’s behavior has changed since their wedding, mentioning a visible injury on her back.

Woman sitting and reading a message about her husband becoming a different person since their wedding.

Text conversation discussing a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Although not drastic, individuals do experience personality changes after getting married

Image credits: vasilij33 / freepik (not the actual photo)

The notion that people don’t change might be slightly misunderstood. When you think about it, you’re probably not the same person you were in your teens or your early twenties, right? And what about friends? Have you ever noticed that you might start to look and act like the people you surround yourself with?

These are not some wild notions or just anecdotal evidence. In 2017, researchers from the University of Georgia conducted a study with heterosexual newlyweds and found that some spouses can change slightly in terms of their identity and personality.

Picking up habits, words, and phrases from your partner with whom you spend every day seems quite normal. However, the researchers, led by the assistant professor of psychology Justin Lavner at the University of Georgia, found that newlyweds experience personality changes no matter their age, relationship status, or how long they’ve lived together before marriage.

Wives and husbands experience different personality changes

Image credits: fxquadro / freepik (not the actual photo)

The authors found three main changes that happen in wives and husbands separately:

• Wives become more closed off, and husbands become more introverted. To unmarried friends, this may seem like the spouses are retreating from social life. Yet, for the married couple, it may mean more commitment to the relationship and dedication to spending time together.
• Women become less anxious, sad, and unhappy, and men become more thorough and careful. Lavner suggests that this is due to partners’ personality traits “rubbing off” on each other. Wives encourage their husbands to be more conscientious, and then they themselves take on their partners’ good qualities in turn.
• Both wives and husbands become less agreeable. Marriage often means learning to adjust to the other person, their need and wants. Unmarried couples may be used to more financial, emotional, and even physical independence, and becoming more impatient and disagreeable when you’re stripped of some of that independence is probably a natural response.

Lavner suggests married couples see the bright side in their and their partner’s personality changes. Oftentimes, when people talk about being unhappy in their relationship, they talk about, ‘Oh, I changed,’ or ‘He changed, she changed.’

“But that can work in both directions, like, ‘Maybe things weren’t as good, and then one of us changed in some way and that really made things better.'”

A spouse’s violent behavior starts off later in the relationship and gradually escalates

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

Sometimes, however, personality changes can be so gruesome that it becomes dangerous for one spouse to stay. And it seems that’s exactly what happened to the wife in this story.

The burn incident indicates that the husband is getting physically violent. And, according to the resources of the United Nations, domestic violence usually escalates “in frequency and severity.”

Isaac Smith, MAT, LCSW, FNTP of Whole Wellness Therapy agrees. He explains that mistreatment happens gradually, and few exploiters will show their true faces at the start. “Everyone puts their best foot forward in the beginning,” he emphasizes.

Because it’s gradual, victims often become used to mistreatment. Smith says that our brains attempt to protect us, and leaving becomes too radical a shift: we simply don’t want the change. That’s why leaving is more complicated than just packing your bags and walking out.

There’s also a lot of stigma about those who delay leaving or don’t leave at all. But it’s not about being strong enough, Smith says. “There are plenty of ‘strong people’ who still end up suffering from [mistreatment],” he writes. “[This idea] minimizes the trauma and invites unnecessary shame and guilt—familiar emotions for people who have suffered [violence].”

Let us hope that the OP finds the courage to leave this situation and posts an update with a happy ending – because she truly deserves it.

People urged the woman to get out of the marriage as quickly as possible

Screenshot of a forum post discussing how a woman’s husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a husband becoming a different person post wedding and advice on handling the situation.

User sharing advice about marriage struggles and how her husband has become a different person since wedding.

Comment discussing psychological abuse and advice for a woman whose husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Text post on social media about a wife saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

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Text post with advice warning about signs a husband has become a different person since their wedding, urging caution and support from family.

Comment warning against pregnancy and advising precautions, related to husband becoming a different person after wedding.

Comment text from user ACM915 advising on legal steps as a woman says her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Text explaining narcissistic behavior changes in a husband since their wedding, describing relationship red flags and manipulation.

Woman expressing concern that her husband has become a different person since their wedding during a conversation.

Comment discussing a woman’s husband becoming a different person and advice on addressing marriage issues.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment advising a woman about her husband becoming a different person since their wedding.

Comment from user Professional_Put5549 advising to fight through pain and consider divorce when husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Comment on marriage issues discussing husband becoming a different person since wedding and advice to leave.

Comment discussing a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding, advising caution.

Text post discussing a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing control and changes in a husband since their wedding in a relationship context.

Text excerpt discussing a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding, addressing feelings of hurt.

Comment warning about marriage abuse, urging to annul marriage before situation worsens, advising against involving children.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing changes in personality after marriage and signs to consider leaving a relationship.

Comment text discussing challenges in marriage and changes in a husband since the wedding from a woman’s perspective.

Text explaining DARVO manipulation tactics in abusive relationships, highlighting changes in husband behavior since wedding.

Comment about a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding, advising to consider annulment.

Screenshot of an online comment warning a woman about her husband’s escalating behavior since their wedding.

Comment text on a social media post discussing a woman saying her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing how a woman says her husband has become a different person since their wedding.

Others shared their horror stories about violent husbands: “Don’t be me. Leave”

Alt text: Woman shares how her husband became a different person after their wedding leading to a difficult and abusive marriage.

Text post discussing a husband becoming a different person since their wedding from a married man's perspective.

Woman describing how her husband became a different person after their wedding, sharing emotional relationship struggles.

Comment sharing a personal story about a husband becoming a different person with negative behavior after marriage.

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