“AITAH For Telling My Husband That He Would Be Responsible For His Daughter From Now On?”

Being a teenager is really difficult; I mean, what with the drastic changes in your physical appearance, having parents who guide you and are emotionally present for you is important. However, when this foundational support is missing, kids tend to act out and that can cause trouble for their families.

Take Reddit user Technical-Door5443, for instance, who was so burnt out from her stepdaughter’s habitual lies that she told her husband that the teen was his responsibility now. Netizens empathized with her and blamed it on the husband, claiming that he has been an emotionally unavailable dad!

More info: Reddit

Having emotionally present parents is important when kids enter their teen phase and go through multiple changes

Girl in a denim jacket sitting outdoors, smiling playfully.

Image credits: user15694850 / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The poster has a 13-year-old stepdaughter whom she loves just like her own children, but the teen has recently started lying a lot about things

Text discussing husband and daughter responsibility for a 13-year-old stepdaughter.

Text about lies and fabrications related to husband-daughter responsibility.

Text about managing responsibilities with a husband and daughter.

Text image about parenting challenges with husband-daughter responsibility involving a toddler and bathroom chaos.

Image credits: Technical-Door5443

Mother caring for baby with daughter nearby, illustrating family responsibility.

Image credits: user18526052 / Freepik (not the actual photo)

One day she told the poster to rest while she looked after her kids, but when she woke up, the teen was gone, and they found her only after 6 hours of searching

Text describing a situation where a husband's responsibility involves searching for a missing daughter.

Text detailing a search and rescue effort, emphasizing the importance of husband-daughter responsibility in emergencies.

Text discussing husband and daughter's health responsibility during illness.

Text discussing husband's responsibility towards daughter and work duties, highlighting daughter's behavior in a doctor's waiting room.

Text describing a hospital visit, mentioning husband and daughter's responsibility.

Image credits: Technical-Door5443

Young girl in a hospital corridor, highlighting daughter responsibility.

Image credits: Wavebreak Media / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Recently, she exaggerated having a stomach ache, but when the poster took her to the ER, she realized the truth and was almost close to tears with anger

Text expressing frustration over husband taking on daughter responsibilities.

Text about husband handling daughter responsibilities, mentioning therapy and work-life balance challenges.

Text discussing husband and daughter responsibility, job loss, and frustration over parental duties.

Text about a husband's responsibility for his daughter, describing his supportive actions and advocacy.

Text detailing a parent's frustration with husband-daughter responsibility, lacking resources and discipline options.

Text discussing challenges in husband-daughter responsibility, highlighting parental presence and custody decisions.

Image credits: Technical-Door5443

She was so sick of everything that she told her husband that the teen was now his responsibility, but he felt that she was going too far

Today, we dive into the life of the original poster (OP) as she tells us how she has had enough of the lies that constantly come from her 13-year-old stepdaughter. She loves her like her own daughter, but recently she has noticed all the habitual lies that the teen makes up about small and big things as well, and sticks to them until proved wrong.

The poster then speaks about an incident that took place in December where the teen mentioned that she would look after OP’s kids so the woman could rest for a while. Well, after she woke up, she noticed that the girl was gone with the dog, leaving behind her 6-month-old baby, 6-year-old daughter, and 4-year-old son, all alone.

The poor woman frantically searched for 3 hours but couldn’t find her and even her husband left work to look for her. It was only after notifying the cops that a search and rescue dog found the teen after 6 hours, and to this day, she refuses to share where she had gone! Sounds quite alarming, doesn’t it?

Unfortunately, that’s not all, for OP also revealed another recent thing that happened just after she recovered from an illness. The 13-year-old mentioned that she had a stomach ache for 2 days, so the poster decided to take her to the pediatric quick care. She even questioned the kid whether she was really sick, to which the girl replied that she was. 

Well, the doctor suggested going to the ER, but once there, OP realized that the teen had just been exaggerating things, and boy was she mad! She was almost close to tears with anger and told her husband that the girl was his responsibility now, but he felt that she was just overwhelmed and overreacting. When OP vented online, folks disagreed with her husband.

Woman in a thoughtful pose, wearing a blue blouse, standing in a room with bookshelves, pondering family responsibilities.

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Many people pointed out that the poster has been bearing the brunt of raising all the kids along with her stepdaughter and they could sense how exhausted she sounded. They also claimed that it was natural for her to react the way she did as the strain on her was getting too much and anyone might lose it in such a situation.

As per the American Psychological Association, “Parental burnout usually occurs in stages. The first stage is overwhelming exhaustion. Parents of teens may experience emotional exhaustion because of conflicts with their children. Next, burned-out parents tend to distance themselves from their kids to preserve their energy. Lastly, parents notice a loss of fulfillment in parenting.”

It looks like something similar happened with the poster as she has been solely burdened with childcare and has also had to deal with the conflict of the teen and her habitual lies. Many people blamed it on the emotionally unavailable father who needs to step up and take equal responsibility for his kid.

Healthline mentions that it can be developmentally typical for teens to exaggerate the truth or tell lies. The article also explains that teens who feel insignificant or unappreciated might lie to gain a sense of recognition or validation from people who matter to them, like peers or parents. Seems like Redditors were right for highlighting that she was doing it to get attention from her dad. 

Bored Panda reached out to the poster who gave us an update, “She started therapy. I am still doing everything for her. I have not ‘washed my hands clean’ I just needed my husband to step up and that’s partly why I haven’t left him. There would be no one in her corner.”

Speaking about the most challenging part of the situation, OP said that she assumed responsibility for all children and the stress of everything. It made her realize that people have to be careful who they choose as their partner and who they have kids with as not all men are created equal.

Lastly, she also shared some advice for stepparents going through the same situation, “Remind yourself that you’re the stepparent. Even if you feel like the real parent, you’re not, and the bio parent should be assuming most of the responsibilities for their child. You should be secondary.”

Do you agree with her? Let us know in the comments!

Netizens sympathized with the exhausted poster and claimed the teen has been doing it for attention from her emotionally unavailable dad and needs therapy

Comment discussing husband and parenting responsibility with daughter.

Text discussing husband’s responsibility in stepdaughter’s upbringing.

Comment discussing the husband's responsibility in parenting and therapy for the daughter after an incident.

Comment discussing concerns about a daughter's behavior and urging the father to take responsibility.

Supportive message about husband-daughter responsibility, encouraging balance and addressing feeling overwhelmed.

Comment on husband-daughter responsibility emphasizing therapy need.

A comment on husband-daughter responsibility, discussing concerns about abnormal behavior and family trauma.

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