I want to know some good comebacks! Post them here!

#1

This one works so well, especially for those mean ttg's in school (iykyk)

Basically you say something offensive back like "shut up" or something along those lines.

Then they'll do their overdramatic jaw drop, so you say "Yes, keep your face like that."

Trust me, I did this and that girl did not open her mouth for the rest of the day.

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#2

" there's no I in team.."
... " but there is U in c*nt"

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#3

dont you eat your cereal with water? cuz ur dad never came home with the milk

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#4

Well, one time back in 6th grade, this really annoying girl in my P.E. class was bugging me. So we were playing Kickball, and neither of us wanted to kick. I was hanging back in the line, away from everyone else. She snuck in behind me and started saying, "Go! Go! Go!" in this really annoying, high-pitched, cheerful voice that got on my nerves so after the sixth "Go!" I said "Away". The look on her face was priceless!

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#5

Never heard it before but thought it'd be a good idea

So say you were playing some sort of team game with your friends and this really annoying person comes over and wants to join but you don't want them to so you say no. the person would pout and be like 'there's no i in team' and you could go like 'there's no u either'.

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#6

I'm gonna make like a tree and leave. Why don't you make like a shoelace and get knotted!

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#7

I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and sh!t a better argument than that.

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#8

I was in a store and the cashier was flirting with me. My creep alarm was going off already from how he was flirting. Then he asked me out. I told him "I have a boyfriend", which was true. Then he looked around and said "well I don't see your boyfriend here" and winked. I leaned in, pretended to think for a second and completely deadpan replied "You bring up an interesting point. Perhaps I will blow you." Creepy cashier rolled back real quick haha.

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#9

Them: *says smth insulting*
you: like you can be talking

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#10

You must've been a slippery baby cuz you hit ur head REAL hard!

You're like a cloud, once you leave it becomes a pretty day

Why don't you go play in traffic?

You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.

Mirrors can't talk. Lucky for you, they can't laugh, either.

You don't need to fear success. There is really nothing for you to worry about.

Are you at a loss for words, or did you exhaust your entire vocabulary?

You're like a gray sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.

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