My grandmother died this morning. She was 73 and had no health issues. When I saw her two weeks ago, she was as joyful as ever. I’ve never lost anyone before, and I don’t know how to handle it. I just feel numb. I spent all day either crying, staring at nothing, or sitting in the bathroom. Can anyone give me any advice, share their experience, or say anything that might help?

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#1

Accept it’s going to hurt for awhile. Allow yourself to feel and process that pain. The hurt never goes away but it recedes into the background while the love and the happy memories dominate the foreground.
As someone else said, grief is the flip side of love. The pain is proportional to your love; if the love wasn’t there, the pain wouldn’t be either. The pain will fade but the love never will.
Finally, don’t go it alone. Reach out to family and friends, join a support group, find a therapist.

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User avatar Chrystina Sumpter
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    #2

    Firstly - sorry for your loss. Speaking for myself who lost some big players last year (5 in total) - there is no right or wrong way of grieving - some days it will hit you like a bus, other days you will laugh until you cry again. Don't put a timetable on it, don't think you have to grieve a certain way. You are allowed to sit in the bathroom doing nothing. You are allowed to ugly cry. Take it one day/hour at a time. Find people who are happy to listen and have tissues with you at all times. Be prepared to think you are turning a corner then get kneecapped by a sudden memory - e.g. a song on the radio. I know this doesn't sound comforting, and I'm sorry for that. Most of all, remember that you are grieving hard because you loved and were loved so hard. 🖤

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    User avatar KatSaidThat
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    #3

    Find a grief support group be it in person, online or both. If you are a reader, there are numerous excellent books on grief; find one or many that resonates with you. Grief is an individual process, there is no right or wrong way or defined time frame. Take care of your self both physically and emotionally throughout the process.

    Grief is the price one pays for love. You loved your grandmother and she loved you. Your grandmother's love and the love you have for her lives on in you and, in time, will comfort you.

    My mother died a few months ago under terrible circumstances

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    User avatar HardBoiledBlonde
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    #4

    Accidentally hit publish and I don't know how to append my answer. I am on a grief journey as you are too, Ellinor. You will now be added to my daily meditation for feelings of peace and love. We both will make it through the journey that is grief.

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    User avatar HardBoiledBlonde
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