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Gen Xer Shares How He Was Accused Of ‘Sexual Harassment’ For Using ‘80s Reference That His Gen Z Colleague Didn’t Understand
The gap between different generations might be bigger than you think. It’s not just a difference in the tech we used or fashion trends—there’s a whole bunch of pop culture baggage that comes with being born in a particular decade. And newer generations might not even be aware of the stuff that used to be popular in their managers’, parents’, or grandparents’ time. Sometimes, obvious comedy can land members of the older gens in hot water because those youngsters just don’t get the references and take things literally.
That’s exactly what happened to one redditor who shared their work story with the r/tifu (‘Times I Effed Up’) online community. He explained how using an old commercial jingle during a meeting made him get into trouble with human resources because some of the younger crowd thought it was ‘sexual harassment.’
You’ll find the full story below, dear Pandas. Have a read, tell us what you think of the entire situation, and if you’ve ever been misunderstood by a younger or older coworker, be sure to share what happened in the comment section.
RELATED:
Not everyone at work might get old pop culture references or jokes. Some even label them ‘sexual harassment’
Image credits: Product School (not the actual photo)
An employee got in trouble with HR after referring to an old commercial that was super popular back in the day
Image credits: Kevin Noonan
The redditor had a couple of updates for the r/tifu community about the miscommunication
Luckily, everything ended fine for the redditor when everyone got the joke. However, it just goes to show that humor at work might not make everyone laugh. Some colleagues might get offended (even if there’s nothing insulting there, really). Bored Panda previously spoke to comedy writer and stand-up comedian Ariane Sherine about the importance of humor in the workplace. She also shared her thoughts about whether or not it’s actually worth being the office clown.
In the comedian’s opinion, humor and fun help motivate employees. There’s definitely a positive effect there. “The more fun you have at work, the more likely you are to want to be at work, so you’re happy to stay for longer and happy to be there in the first place,” she told us that nobody’s enthusiastic to go back to work in a miserable, toxic environment.
“My last job was a blast, we had loads of fun and it was a really warm, friendly environment so I couldn’t wait to get into work in the mornings,” she said that a wholesome, collegial environment encourages workers to do their best and go the extra mile.
“It’s difficult not to take work seriously when it takes up so much of your life, and if it’s impairing your happiness then you need to look for a new job,” she said that we shouldn’t spend all our time being miserable. There are options out there. Better ones.
According to Ariane, the more skilled and irreplaceable you are at your job, the more allowances you get when it comes to humor.
“Sure, you can be the office clown, but only if you’re really good at your job too. No one’s going to mind you joking around if you’re also acing it at work,” the comedy expert stressed that nobody will mind a joke or two from time to time if you’re getting results.
“It’s when it’s detrimental to your work that people start to frown upon it. But I’ve always been the company clown and I’ve found it’s a great way to get through the grind of a workday!”
For those of you Pandas who might not know the jingle (or might need a refresher), here’s the full commercial
Depending on whom you ask, the differences between generations can be seen as either superficial or fundamental. Financial expert Sam Dogen, the author of ‘Buy This, Not That: How to Spend Your Way to Wealth and Freedom’ and the founder of ‘Financial Samurai,’ recently shared his thoughts about these differences with Bored Panda.
“As someone who used to manage a small team in finance, the one thing I appreciated the most from employees was effort. If employees were trying their best to get things done and showed that they cared, I knew they were going places. Showing you give a damn about your fellow colleagues and your work is more than half the battle,” he said that managers appreciate honest, hard work.
“Bosses can inspire their employees by giving a damn as well! If the boss is always coming in on time, taking their subordinates out for lunch to see how they are doing, and works hard, employees will be inspired. And when employees are inspired, they will care more and do better work. It is a virtuous cycle,” the expert told us.
“Great bosses lead by example. They are not micromanagers either. Instead, they are honest about difficult situations, believe in their employees, support their employees, and engender trust.”
Sam revealed to Bored Panda that he’s a member of Gen X—he’s turning 45 this summer. In his former job, he oversaw some younger employees, as well.
“We grew up without the internet and now have the internet. I did manage a couple of employees who were 10 years younger than me, hence the millennial generation. One got in trouble because he felt entitled to a much larger bonus than $20,000 after his first year out of college! After he got his bonus, he refused to come to work for a week. That was an interesting situation,” he shared with us.
“It seems like more employees want to reach the corner office sooner, without putting in their dues. This may be perhaps due to the internet, social media, and how quickly information is disseminated. When you see someone on social media get super-rich quickly, you start feeling the same way too.”
Here’s how people reacted to what happened. Some of them thought it was either amusing or weird that someone didn’t know the reference
What do you think ?
Ryan-James O'Driscoll 3 years ago
I have been called racist for using the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" because the person who reported me hadn't heard it. I appreciate that misunderstandings can occur (and of course genuine harassment), and it's sensible to think about other ways things can be interpreted. But the burden isn't entirely on the speaker. Automatically jumping to the worst possible interpretation of what someone is saying (especially when that interpretation doesn't really make any sense) can have real consequences.
JB 3 years ago
Same here for saying “I’m on it like white on rice”. Someone complained to my boss. He gave me a verbal warning (I don’t blame him for that, it’s his job when a complaint has been made). I blank-face stuttered “but it’s NOT racist and never has been! Why are you giving me grief instead of educating the person complaining that it’s a long-standing, well-known, phrase with no racial connotations whatsoever? Why is their failure to comprehend my fault?” He had no answer for that.
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Mad McQueen 3 years ago
Good point. We can't reference the past. They can't do the same to current stuff. No Reese for you. No dojo cat for them.
Bittersweetie 3 years ago
Oh gurl and you know if anything gets even remotely banned ideologically or otherwise anywhere near my Reese's PBC's that IS the hill I will die on!💁bye!
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Jono 3 years ago
Some peoples minds work in strange ways. I couldn’t see anything sexual or harassing in it.
Monday 3 years ago
Same...I'd never heard of the commercial either but my mind certainly doesn't jump to sex.
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NicNor5560 3 years ago
Downvote me I don't care but there are so many outs out there that it's easy for someone to blame someone else for your own feelings. There is nothing sexual/racist/ageist in what he said and whatever else people said in the comments above/below. That woman was way too fast to blame that man for the sexual orientation her mind went through. Keep your head out of the gutter! Not everything is about you!
Wondering Alice 3 years ago
I can completely see where you are coming from, but would like to offer another view. My first real job in the 90's, I was a 16 year old girl working with men in their 30's and 40's. I didn't understand a lot of their references, but was conditioned that this was entirely my problem so I kept quiet and did my job. A few times I felt comments might be sexual, and told the man (it was mainly just one) I felt uncomfortable. He told me to grow up. When he followed me in to a cupboard wielding a vibrater and trying to unbutton my blouse I screamed and got away - only to be told I had led him on by accepting his inuando. I've been teaching a long time and tell students - if it makes you uncomfortable, go tell HR. A lot of people of my generation have similar stories, that has a lot to do with why we tell the following generations to speak out quickly. I felt th OP got this.
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John Baker 3 years ago
It's beyond ridiculous. I almost feel sorry for the "wokesters." When the pendulum swings the other way, as it sooner or later inevitably will, I don't think they're going to like it much. It's going to be quite traumatic for them.
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Zophra 3 years ago
Why not just immediately ask the person what they meant by that? And then take it from there.
Lorie Shewbridge 3 years ago
Right! If I’d been there and didn't understand (which I do know the commercial) I’d just have turned around, looked him in the eye and said, “Excuse ME!”
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Noriki Tatakino 3 years ago
People just need to STOP. After all CONTEXT MATTERS. On what planet does getting chocolate in peanut butter become even remotely sexual in the context of “this marketing proposal coupled with this sales pitch will really cut costs and drive revenue” ? And what happened to “I don’t understand what you mean, can you clarify?” As a suitable response?
NicNor5560 3 years ago
HR is also in the wrong here. For taking her complaint, for not understanding, and the way the guy was treated.
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Paul Davis 3 years ago
This reminds me of the elderly janitor who was fired from his job at a middle school because he loved to sing the incredibly innocent "Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's Off To Work We Go" song from children's film "Snow White", which he had been doing for literally decades until then. Inexplicably, no on in the school administration had ever seen the movie nor heard of the song and simply assumed he was somehow singing a song about prostitutes.
Elsie 3 years ago
You really do have to be careful what you say these days although it was a commercial it wasn't slang. I would have been confused too but I will say this I wish more people wouldn't be scared to clarify or say that they are offended before going to hr or management. The person should have given this guy a chance to apologize or explain what it meant instead of causing trouble
NicNor5560 3 years ago
I don't agree. We shouldn't have to think what the others will think before saying something, unless, of course, you mean to hurt or you know you will hurt. The OP should not apologize; he was not out of line - the lady was.
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harry Henderson 3 years ago
"but it made me feel old and misunderstood". So what is stopping them from complaining to HR about being made to feel that way?
Allen Bouchard 3 years ago
Even if you don't know the reference, how deranged do you have to be to think that the phrase is in anyway sexual.
Bob Cakin 3 years ago (edited)
Peanut butter is a well know slang term for a woman who is "easy to spread" and is quite often used as a synonym for "sl*t". "Spread" here is referring to the spreading of one's legs. Chocolate is often used to describe black people (especially when referring to sex). So the phrase could technically be interpreted as: You're getting chocolate (a black man) in my peanut butter (sl*t, wh*re, etc.). So without the context of the commercial, it is actually pretty easy to interpret the phrase sexually given modern slang. Just because you don't know/use a lot of slang doesn't mean other people don't. Cultural misunderstandings like this are gonna happen. They're not "deranged". They just have a different background than you.
Load More Replies... Stephanie Paich 3 years ago
The solution is, instead of running to HR with every little problem you have, you TALK to the person and let them know what they said upset you. If it really had been inappropriate, she could have attempted to tell you to knock it off herself before running to tattle, would have saved a lot of time and embarrassment. I'm from an area where none of the workers ever would have gone to HR until they tried every possible other option of coming to an agreement with their coworker.
Xiaolinstyle 3 years ago
In this situation it isn't practical to assume that a young woman is going to be comfortable confronting an older man. But it is 100% her obligation to do the smallest amount of research or questioning before bolting to HR.
Load More Replies... Fat Harry 3 years ago
Bloody hell. We still make regular reference to "I 'ate you Buttler!" from On the Buses (which was a bloody awful program), "I'm freee!" from Are You Being Served? and "Don't Panic!" from Dad's Army. Hopefully no one takes offence at those.
Goth mouse (they/them) 3 years ago
I use “Don’t panic!” and “We’re doomed! Doomed!” all the time and im young 😅
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Hobby Hopper 3 years ago
I was once talking about the bugs chiggers at work, which if you don't know are a tiny type of mite common in the US South, and they will absolutely ruin your day (they get on you when you walk through brush or high grass and bite, embedding their mouth parts into the skin and causing intense itching). Someone thought the word "chigger" was a slur combining a nationality with another very ugly word for a person of African descent. Thankfully, they asked about it instead of going to HR, and all was well.
Bob Cakin 3 years ago
To be fair to them... that actually really does sound like it could be a racial slur. Glad they felt comfortable enough to talk to you for clarification first though! Shows that you must be a fairly nice person to work with!
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Jason Doakes 3 years ago
Just like those "adults" that complain about children "dressing provocately" are obviously sickos, this lady is clearly a perv, or heavily paranoid due to trauma. Where is the sexual innuendo in Peanutbutter and chocolate? Real victims are treated with suspicion and incredulity because of mentally diversely abled people like this lady.
Goth mouse (they/them) 3 years ago
Um… what’s sexual about peanut butter? i dont think i want to know 😬
Aliquid 3 years ago
Peanut butter isn't the factor. The person heard "you got your ___ in my ___" and they thought it was sexual. Fill in the blanks with anything and they would claim it is sexual.
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TJ Wilkins 3 years ago
I’m sooo glad that I don’t have to work with the newest generation!!! I am constantly making pop-culture references AND constantly googling new phraseology. I agree with the original writer: I absolutely was aware of generations of slogans, etc when I was in my 20s. Even worse I watch a lot of old movies so I am aware that the phrase ‘that’s white of you’ is actually a reference to the the concept that the bad guys always wore black and the good guys white in movies. But yes I’m smart enough to not say that in public - have been reemed in my own house by sons girlfriend so that was an education for both of us. I think this Gen Z (or whatever) is the most self-consumed generation yet and refuses to realize that older generations (30 & over) don’t necessarily mean anything derogatory and simply need to be made aware that some things are inappropriate. But then A LOT are just looking for a problem, like something as silly as chocolate in peanut butter.
Vivian Ashe 3 years ago
It seems so odd to me that someone would go to HR about a comment when they don't even know what it means. If I were in a meeting and someone said something that was obviously some kind of reference, I think I'd say something like, "Huh? I don't get it." Or I would go look it up on the internet later. Or ask one of my coworkers if they know what it means. Why go to HR and create tension as your first response?
Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
Why didn't this girl just ask him what it meant? Or ask somebody else? She goes straight to HR assuming he's being pervy? Way to stifle creativity. People can't say anything anymore. The world is not that serious. Gen Z is supposed to have some levity. Where is it here?
Alexis 3 years ago
I don't see why "you've got your chocolate in my peanut butter" is a sexually charged remark... As a fellow woman who has not heard of this commercial before, I wouldn't think so but would pobably be confused. Maybe she should get her head out of the gutter!
John Baker 3 years ago
And how is someone who works in advertising not aware of one of the most popular and successful ad campaigns of the late 20th century?
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Brian bell 3 years ago
This is a tough one because it does seem that the art of conversation, and with it, the ability to miscommunicate here and there - without offending someone - is getting lost. For example, here, the OP mentions it was a "teaching experience." For him? To not joke around anymore? Did the woman apologize for overreacting? Does she even care?
Bob Cakin 3 years ago (edited)
Wtf do you mean overreacting? All that happened was a HR meeting to clear up the misunderstanding. OP doesn't say anything like, "she threw a book at me and called me a sexist right there in the meeting!" Just that she chose to hold in her thoughts and deal privately with their misunderstanding through HR (which is the whole point of HR). And it's very easy to see how the phrase could be interpreted sexually given what "peanut butter" and "peanut butter legs" means in slang. (Hint: peanut butter is often used to refer to women who's legs are "easy to spread" aka... women who have a lot of sex)
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TheReader19 3 years ago (edited)
Here's a dumb idea, if someone says something don't understand, ask to explain it. If it's innocent then the misunderstanding's cleared up; if it's sexual innuendo then there going to be caught out
Geoff 3 years ago
Everyone has their own frame of reference to the world around them. There's nothing inherently bad about a good-natured cultural reference that is misunderstood. I think the larger gap is a failure to communicate. If he saw she was confused, OP could have taken the time after the meeting to explain the reference to her... or if the young woman didn't understand the comment, she could have approached the OP after the meeting to request clarification. The act of going to HR feels like an unnecessary escalation to a simple misunderstanding. Talk to each other... and stop assuming the worst in others... you might find the world is a happier place after all.
TrickQuestion 3 years ago
Another incident that could have been solved with a simple "huh? What do you mean?"
Casey McAlister 3 years ago
This whole situation might have been avoided if his colleague, instead of jumping to her own conclusions and acting on them, just asked him to explain what he meant. I could understand if it was clearly something sexual, inappropriate and offensive, but it wasn't, so maybe if you don't understand it, just ask, no? Communication is the key.
YetAnotherSarah 3 years ago
I'm old enough/confident enough to either directly call someone out or simply feign ignorance ("I don't understand. Explain that to me.") until we're *all* uncomfortable. But if I really didn't understand, I'd google that s**t before bringing it up with HR.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
Welcome to the world where everyone is offended by everything.
Gary Hanson 3 years ago
Once in a meeting I finished what I was saying and was asked if I was done. I replied that yes I had shot my wad. I am into history. I my mind was the fact that wading is the last thing to leave a cannon barrel. I looked around saw some of the attendees wide eyed. Then I blushed. But in a professional setting I don't think that way.
censor 3 years ago
no dude even in the 1890s "shooting your wad" out of your "cannon" could easily be misconstrued.
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Laura Radle 3 years ago
I know this is going to get me into hot water. Sorry, I'm sexually harassing water. But anyway, she apparently had sex on her mind, to think this was harassment. (If you know what I mean). No I not going to explain. This generation best get over themselves, they are creating stupidity to be normal.
Daytriker T 3 years ago
Have people literally become THAT sensitive or are they just plain stupid? God forbid, I ever hire one of those precious little cupcakes, I'd have to completely change my vocabulary from Archie Bunker to Homer Simpson.
John Baker 3 years ago
They're both overly sensitive *and* just plain stupid.
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Tony Payson 3 years ago
I remember we used to say, "Never trust anyone over 30." Now it's, "Never trust anyone under 30."
Evelyn Ann 3 years ago
Absolutely ridiculous that default for not understanding something is it must be a pointed remark at me. Im 35 and know commercial jingles from 1950s etc. It really is a shining example of how far the pendulum has swung and it's definitely NOT for the better. I should not have to watch my every remark. People need to first be not so g-d sensitive and secondly ask if one doesn't understand instead of default to being offended. Asking for clarification is key to communication. Our current generation instead chooses to immediately be butthurt and cry to someone else instead of choosing to be emotionally intelligent. "I don't understand so they must be harassing me" is actually a concise way to sum up gen Z. Lack of awareness outside of oneself plus unearned outrage all wrapped up in one.
Scott Wittig 3 years ago
This newer Gen is also the most hypocritical as they love their rap/hip-hop/pop that is all about calling women whores (hoe) sexualizing, nasty rape dreams , and murder. Oh but don't use something from the 80s that wasn't even meant as such.
Kantami Blossom 3 years ago
People seriously need to educate themselves better, being from the 80's isn't an excuse not to know a catchphrase I once used a catchphrase surprising people because it was fae a guy the died in the 60's over 20 years before I was even born.
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)
Three snaps up in a Z formation to the person who referenced In Living Color! On another note, a quick Google search, and the young woman could’ve found the reference, and saved everyone a whole lot of grief over nothing. Think—-and research—-before going to such an extreme. A basic critical thinking skill that college is supposed to teach you. If you were paying attention and not looking for ways to contrive a false victimhood for yourself, that is. There are true victims out there, and you only cast unfair doubts on their efforts to overcome and eradicate the systemic issues that truly victimize them—-besides, the majority of genuine victims don’t call, or even consider, themselves victims, but the strongest of survivors. The young woman in this entry really needs to get her head out of her a*s, come out of her bubble, and join the rest of us out here in the real world.
Shawn Baymiller 3 years ago
So the person didn't want to look stupid in front of everyone in the meeting and files an HR complaint potentially making themselves look stupid in front of the whole company if the complaint somehow got out. Smart. Speaking of gaps between generations, I often wonder if more recent generations took grammar classes. The author pluralized managers, parents and grandparents when they're already pluralized. It's not managers's.
John Baker 3 years ago
Gen Z doesn't think silly things like spelling, grammar, punctuation, formatting or even using the correct word are important. ;-)
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PaxScientia 3 years ago
I'm sorry, but if she heard that phrase and thought she was being sexually harassed, she was just looking for something to complain about.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
I agree. People who want to complain will always find a reason.
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Zero 3 years ago
I don't know how anyone over 20 couldn't know of it. It has completely permeated pop culture and is still referenced at some point in just about every show!
Tony Campbell 3 years ago
Im a genxer and if i want to dog whistle i will and the feminist movement bunch can kiss my a*s!
Krista mccurry 3 years ago
My husband was manager if a sales team. They were doing an all day meeting and my husband asked, “what they wanted for lunch.” The people in the meeting were of all ages. They started sing singing a line for a commercial that was still airing on tv. “Five dollar footling”. Some woman who was older than my husband complained to HR. Apparently Hr didn’t know about the commercial either.
Monique Gordon 3 years ago
Someone was telling me that their friend was gay and I interrupted by saying the classic line “not that there’s anything wrong with that “as per Seinfeld episode and they were totally offended. Ugh, I couldn’t even be bothered
Josie Sangione 3 years ago
No soup for you! Omg, Seinfeld is just FILLED with the best quotes.
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Joe calbery 3 years ago
Gen Z has been taught that their feelings trump absolutely everything, including common sense. It's not their fault, it is the fault of a society that gives both winners and losers trophies, instead of motivating individuals to succeed. Also, I would have asked how that Reese's jingle could possibly be in any way sexual innuendo
Daniel LaDue 3 years ago (edited)
It's sad that this guy had to tip toe, and say it was a "teachable moment", like he is the one who needs to adjust. How about the young, dumb, or easily upset ask questions before they tattle?
RADUGA.babochka 3 years ago (edited)
I'm a teen and I know old references because of my ma' and g-man talking about stuff from years back. It kinda showing how lots of younger people don't know certain stuff. Everything now is always taken to offence which is annoying as hell even if I'm on their side; They can get really extreme tbh- and why does everything to them have to sound bad?! 🙄
J. Brelner 3 years ago
If she was confused about the phrase, she should have asked about it at the meeting, not tattling to HR. What a snowflake.
Beth Ellis 3 years ago
I work in HR and had to investigate a sexual harassment complaint by an elderly client towards a male staff member. He was making small talk about the Xmas gifts he received from him mum and joking that she still buys him boxer shorts. The elderly person interpreted the conversation as him telling her a story of how he taught his mum to "give head" at Xmas, and filed a complaint. The brand name of the boxer shorts his mum gave him was Head Shorts.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I give you so much credit because I don't think I could have kept a straight face once I heard the entire story and figured out the confusion.
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Bi-Polar Express 3 years ago
I remember when you could know about stuff that happened before your time and you weren't considered a witch! You have the internet now and you refuse to educate yourself about the recent past. Or say, hey, I don't know that. What does it mean? This works for both people being crude and people innocently repeating a very popular commercial.
Porpoisepower 3 years ago
Twitter, and other social media services that treated you for making hard lined reactionary judgements has made society incompatible with nuance. People don't want to listen to the concerns of people they disagree with. We are f'ed.
Alma Muminovic 3 years ago
I mean there is a bit of a sexual undertone in that commercial otherwise they wouldn’t have used a man and a female as the actors. Just saying. 🤷🏼♀️
John Baker 3 years ago
The one I remember was two guys. In those days, I doubt there were any "sexual undertones."
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Jay Walsh 3 years ago (edited)
The problem I have here, and I would of made clear and possibly made my own complaint at the time. She didn't bother to ask you about it/seek clarifcation before running to HR. I would of just asked, so..when you use a phrase I don't understand being older (example, TL;DR) should I just run to HR and claim you either racism or ageism on your part, or should i ask you to clarify? Then point out, this is a reason for "friction" between generations, and it's not always the older person at fault. The instant assumption of racism, without any attempt at clarification (literally a google search on the phrase would of been enough here), is in and of itself, racist....
Nicholle Carriere 3 years ago
An older colleague and I used to make Monty Python jokes at work (I'm Canadian). We mostly got confused looks from our younger colleagues, but a few became addicted to Monty Python as a result.
Josie Sangione 3 years ago
Dead! Dead! Bring out your dead! But I'm not dead! You will be soon. (Clunk)
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MediumPimpin 3 years ago
I'm glad I work in a professional environment where we can openly flirt and tell each other to f themselves. I told my manager to go sh1t in his hat once. It got a good laugh.
Bravo6Two 3 years ago
Not only did they use it in the 80's, didn't they also run a similar campaign in the late 90's, early 00's? I remember similar commercials on tv from that period....regardless, not only is it an old trend, it's one that's been used in different decades.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
Yea it definitely must have been reused because I instantly realized it from my teens which would have been early 00's.
Load More Replies... David Nyman 3 years ago
What about the phrase, "Not a problem?" Does anyone else get offended when they are told that?
Coleman Berg 3 years ago
Ignorance, same thing that killed off the “witches” in Salem.
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Colin Idris Williams 1 year ago
This got me thinking of BURGER KING, WH when they opened in the Uk they had a promotion where if you said either " you need two hands just to hold that thing" or " it's so big you gotta grin to get it in" to the counter staff you'd get a free Whooper. They were the advertising catch lines... No one minded.
Andrew Bridge 3 years ago
Jeez, I'm english and I know that reference. I think we only got reeces on our shelves last year (outside of the "american stuff" areas)
StarlightPanda! 3 years ago
Unfortunately it hasn't changed enough. Some (too many) employers (as well as people) don't take this stuff seriously when it's an actual problem.
Lisa Mack 3 years ago
Didn't Family Guy use this in a side gag one episode (I seem to remember a police officer and a car accident) so that'd be the 2000s and not even an 80s reference
l bee 3 years ago
Two guys got in a car accident and the cop shot them both in the head to take the idea. There was more to it then that, but I don't remember. It's been a long time since I saw it.
Load More Replies... Coleman Berg 3 years ago
The same young people who crank their car stereos so that I get to hear some “superstar” talk rhythmically over a drum machine beat about her genitals and how she uses them are cowering in fear from loose talk of combining chocolate and peanut butter in a commercially available confection. The world is in deep doodoo.
Carol Lewis 3 years ago
I am aware that there are cases of real harassment but there are some people who are just looking for it so they can have a reason to be indignant. Its tiresome to work with someone like that.
Squirrelly Panda 3 years ago
When referring to old pop culture to people significantly younger, I usually preface it with a comment on what I'm referring to. For example, "to quote that old candy commercial, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter." This way, even if they don't get the quote, they have an idea of where it came from, and it opens up the option to ask for details if wanted.
Matthew Stark 3 years ago
I'm in my fifties. I was hanging out with my niece and nephew, both in their mid teens. I told my nephew to quit acting goofy as he was teasing his sister. He got so upset with me. Apparently, the word goof today is someone who is a either a pedophile, rapist or the beater of those who are vulnerable... Great. 😬 And yeah, I asked, 'So what's Disney's Goofy?' I give up.
John Baker 3 years ago
I confess I wouldn't have been nearly as understanding as the OP. Homie don't play that.
Will Sowers 3 years ago
Give it a decade or two, inter-human communication will be taboo. No safe steps left in the minefield.
Lumin Warraxxe 3 years ago
Idk what out of touch marketing firm he works for but for them to have some kids in the creation process that don't even recognize that jingle is a issue in and of itself.
Tyler Chicago 3 years ago
This man should review what constitutes as harassment in the workplace. Because all that is needed to report to HR is if any party feels uncomfortable. You don't even need to be in the room when a comment is made to report to HR. He has a possible lawsuit if he wanted to act on it for interrogating him for what the phrase means making him feel uncomfortable about his age in the workplace which is also reportable to HR too bad his HR dropped the ball and helped cause that discomfort.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
What most people who are easily offended don't understand, is the more they run to HR, the less others want to work with them. We had a woman at work who constantly ran to HR about the most innocent thinks. It got so bad they had to transfer her because everyone at our facility refused to work with her. Even all the other women refused to work with her.
Load More Replies... Monique Gordon 3 years ago
Friend said her brother came out on weekend as gay and I interrupted with “not that there is anything wrong with that”, per Seinfeld. She said she took offence and I was like ugh, I didn’t even bother to explain.
Ray Arani 3 years ago (edited)
I literally just showed my 11 year old this old Reese's commercial after using the phrase and confusing him. Its probably why this came up in my feed. What I don't understand is why this Gen Zer hadn't heard of Google. Like, seriously why didn't it occur to them to Google the slogan before reporting it? Particularly as someone who works specifically in marketing.
Izzy Curer 3 years ago (edited)
Reminds me of this: "On January 15, 1999, David Howard, an aide to the mayor of Washington D.C., used "niggardly" in reference to a budget. This apparently upset one of his black colleagues, who misinterpreted it as a racial slur and lodged a complaint." He had to resign.
Anthony Elleman 3 years ago
If an individual doesn't understand a statement and feels harassed that's a malfunction of their emotions; they should have felt stupid.
Sunny Summers 3 years ago
I think the commercial used in this is intentionally misleading. Why, out of ALL the other commercials for the same product with the same tag line, did you pick the one with a guy and girl? Like, really. Why?
Sunny Summers 3 years ago
I think that the one commercial clip you decided to use in this story is intentionally misleading! Why did you pick, out of ALL the other commercials for the same product with the same tag line, one that has a guy and girl? I mean, really. Why?
FailBunny17 3 years ago
😅 As a person that relies heavily on referencing to socialize, this and all the comments terrify me greatly. *shuts door, accepts life as a recluse from now on*
Mtg Wolfie 3 years ago
One of the other people in the meeting should've used McDonald's jingle.
Houseof No 3 years ago
If it helps, most sexual harassment cases require the plaintiff to demonstrate a "pattern of behavior." One innocuous statement or joke is not likely to land someone in hot water. Most courts use a "reasonable person" benchmark. Would a "reasonable person" likely feel threatened or intimidated by this speech or behavior. Telling one racist or sexist joke may show poor judgement, but it almost never amounts to a hostile work environment by itself. Luckily most courts are aware of this. It's not meant to create unfair hurdles to filing complaints, but is meant not to clog the courts with lawsuits everytime an offensive remark is made.
Mike willett 3 years ago
This is stupid. These kids now get their feelings hurt over everything. People shouldn't have to walk around on eggshells because they might hurt your poor little feelings. I shouldn't have to give up my 1st amendment right because you're to in your feelings and can't handle it. And most of these girls that claim they were sexually harrassed at work are bug ugly fat girls who should feel lucky anyone spoke to them let alone made something that could be considered sexual. This is another reason people don't want to work a traditional job it's not so much the job but these young kids who've been coddled and and sheltered their whole lives and dunno how to act around regular people who don't care about their feelings.
Katrina Eden 3 years ago (edited)
There's a new gum commercial out that is sexually charged and their slogan is "Chew it before you do it." I have a problem with this slogan mainly because of the setting. It's in a woman's room with lots of dolls and the guy looks freaked out as he puts some gum in his mouth. They're not even trying to censor things anymore.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I can't stand that commercial. Not just because of the line but because the dolls freak me out. They really couldn't have come up with something funny to go with it instead of overly cringey
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Analyn Lahr 3 years ago
They used to show that commercial on TV Land, back when was a new channel and showed the classics plus "retro-mercials".
Random Anon 3 years ago
Yeah I've also been accused of malicious intentions with common phrases, even on this very site. It appears if there is the slightest tinniest reason to take offense, there will be someone out there getting salty. Being an old geezer, I just don't care anymore. Go ahead and be offended when clearly there was no intention there. I just can't be bothered to walk on eggshells all the time for fear of some special person getting their feelings hurt. As we used to say, suck it up buttercup.
Sunny Day 3 years ago
We are a society of tattle tales. If someone says or does or posts anything that MIGHT be questionable, or that someone else just THINKS might be questionable, off to tattle they go. Moo-o-o-mmm! Suzy said niggardly! What are you going to do about it? (That means "cheap or stingy", if you grew up in a barn)
LennytheCat 3 years ago
Relating to Homie Don't Play Dat.....As a gay man, Homo Don't Play Dat has become a phrase with less and less relevance lol
Perry Sologia 3 years ago (edited)
What they gonna do,: sack you? You got to get legal with these people or they win.
Joshua Epperson 3 years ago
To be fair to the girl that original commercial came out 50 years ago in 1972. It's literally been half a century since it was relevant and with the speed at which pop culture moves now it might as well have been the bronze age
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I think they refused it though because I instantly remembered them having that commercial when he mentioned it and it was when I was a teen so early 00's? So still awhile ago, but not quite that long.
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Raq Ram 3 years ago
I hate Gen Z's culture and the entire generation. They are are vapid, boring, barely can read or write or follow directions or instructions. They cannot read a paper map, do basic math in their head, or process sarcasm. They are completely disabled without their smartphones and cannot participate in idle chit chat in a grocery line to be friendly. They go online to rage about unresolved world issues and "cancel" people to suppress all forms of free thinking or 1st Amendment speech. This is an effed up generation and past generations need to band together and revolt this nonsense before they erase all forms of creativity, morality and humanity of the past forever. *gets off soapbox*
Bravo6Two 3 years ago
I mean, they can't afford to move out anywhere, but it somehow thier fault that houses that went for 200k a few years ago are going for 1M$+ too. Right? That soapbox made your a*s look big
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Sean Stimson 3 years ago
I don't even understand why people are taking issue with this story. There was a misunderstanding between two employees, HR investigated and cleared the matter up, nobody was reprimanded, etc., and everyone had a chuckle over it. Things worked exactly as they should. What's the problem?
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
Personally, my issue with it is she didn't know whether it was or not and didn't bother even trying to find out before going to HR. She could have at least asked someone or googled it first.
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LH25 3 years ago
I go back and forth a bit. On one hand, I wonder why the younger woman didn't ask what the older guy meant before going to HR. But then I kind of get her not being comfortable doing that. I actually reported a co-worker for harassment some years back, his was blatant. HR told me that I had to have told him that the conduct and comments were not welcome before they could get involved.
Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
She didn't have to ask him. She could have asked one of the other colleagues who seemed to get the joke. Or God forbid- done a google search. Before threatening a man's job by going to HR.
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Sue User 3 years ago
I worked in an office that had a karge foreign workforce. I frequently use colloquialisms : "the whole nine yards". Colleague asked me what it meant. We found a website that would translate for her - though I did try to limit them going forward. On the flip side ( oops) , I love urban dictionary.
David Andrews 3 years ago
The marketing woman is an idiot, however this guy needs relax a bit. The woman overreacted to nothing, and has made a fool of herself, and no doubt everyone at the office will be talking about that time she reported someone to HR for quoting a jingle that was in no way sexual. There is no need to jump straight to the "everyone is too PC now, we all have to police what we say" line. Laugh if off as a nonsense that happened at work from a young colleague, and unless you are actually likely to say something offensive for some reason, no need to worry before talking.
Alyssia Taylor 3 years ago (edited)
I know this is a reasonable topic, but I can't stop laughing at the "old and misunderstood" line. It just sounds like such a non-issue. I'd understand if it made him feel 'greasy' or 'predatory' or something, but ohhh noooo, he feels oLD aNd MisUnDeRsTOoD"😂😂
John Baker 3 years ago
Why should he feel "greasy" or "predatory?" It isn't his fault he was dealing with a total moron.
Load More Replies... Raq Ram 3 years ago
Thanks! I heard ant butts are in and the Gen Zs are actually offing themselves by going to other countries to get a cheaper deal to look like me. Yet they still mooch off mommy & daddy by living in their basement, attic, spare room, guest house, old childhood room or the garage. Funny how they spend ALL DAY AND NIGHT on their phones yet cannot figure out how to make in REAL LIFE. Such a weak bunch of whiny, arrogant, delusional weaklings that exemplify a "victim mentality"
Bob Cakin 3 years ago
Seriously... how the hell have absolutely none of you heard of "peanut butter legs"? Or just heard "peanut butter" be used as a way to describe women whose legs are "easy to spread"? Aka a woman who has a lot of sex. Seriously.. there's a bunch of songs referencing that slang! How have none of you heard this? It's really not that hard to see how saying you're getting chocolate (slang often used to refer to black people) in my peanut butter (slang often used synonymously with words like sl*t/wh*re) might be interpreted sexually.
Dominique Walton 3 years ago
Most food advertisements have a sexual undertone to sell more food. So I completely understand how she thought that without hearing the commercial.
Mary Rogers 3 years ago (edited)
The problem was not that he was misunderstood and had to explain himself, but that he was reported to HR. No wonder men are paranoid these days about getting accused of sexual harassment. If I were her I just would have looked at him funny and said, "I don't get it." That's if I didn't get the reference, which I do. I commend young women for standing up for themselves, but they also need to understand that misunderstandings happen and not automatically jump to conclusions. What if he had said something that wasn't a clear cultural reference but was simply misunderstood, therefore resulting in a ruined career? I speak from experience. I know someone this happened to.
Load More Replies... Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
Shizit. I'd never be able to say anything. I can't be responsible for every human beings "uncomfortable" feelings. Not being a douche- sure. But not saying a commercial line. Nope. It's up to you to toughen up in this case. I'm not living in a world of censorship. I'll try to be respectful. You try too. That means understanding I have freedom to speak- especially about chocolate and peanut butter for crimeny sake.
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Ryan-James O'Driscoll 3 years ago
I have been called racist for using the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" because the person who reported me hadn't heard it. I appreciate that misunderstandings can occur (and of course genuine harassment), and it's sensible to think about other ways things can be interpreted. But the burden isn't entirely on the speaker. Automatically jumping to the worst possible interpretation of what someone is saying (especially when that interpretation doesn't really make any sense) can have real consequences.
JB 3 years ago
Same here for saying “I’m on it like white on rice”. Someone complained to my boss. He gave me a verbal warning (I don’t blame him for that, it’s his job when a complaint has been made). I blank-face stuttered “but it’s NOT racist and never has been! Why are you giving me grief instead of educating the person complaining that it’s a long-standing, well-known, phrase with no racial connotations whatsoever? Why is their failure to comprehend my fault?” He had no answer for that.
Load More Replies... Mad McQueen 3 years ago
Good point. We can't reference the past. They can't do the same to current stuff. No Reese for you. No dojo cat for them.
Bittersweetie 3 years ago
Oh gurl and you know if anything gets even remotely banned ideologically or otherwise anywhere near my Reese's PBC's that IS the hill I will die on!💁bye!
Load More Replies... Jono 3 years ago
Some peoples minds work in strange ways. I couldn’t see anything sexual or harassing in it.
Monday 3 years ago
Same...I'd never heard of the commercial either but my mind certainly doesn't jump to sex.
Load More Replies... NicNor5560 3 years ago
Downvote me I don't care but there are so many outs out there that it's easy for someone to blame someone else for your own feelings. There is nothing sexual/racist/ageist in what he said and whatever else people said in the comments above/below. That woman was way too fast to blame that man for the sexual orientation her mind went through. Keep your head out of the gutter! Not everything is about you!
Wondering Alice 3 years ago
I can completely see where you are coming from, but would like to offer another view. My first real job in the 90's, I was a 16 year old girl working with men in their 30's and 40's. I didn't understand a lot of their references, but was conditioned that this was entirely my problem so I kept quiet and did my job. A few times I felt comments might be sexual, and told the man (it was mainly just one) I felt uncomfortable. He told me to grow up. When he followed me in to a cupboard wielding a vibrater and trying to unbutton my blouse I screamed and got away - only to be told I had led him on by accepting his inuando. I've been teaching a long time and tell students - if it makes you uncomfortable, go tell HR. A lot of people of my generation have similar stories, that has a lot to do with why we tell the following generations to speak out quickly. I felt th OP got this.
Load More Replies... John Baker 3 years ago
It's beyond ridiculous. I almost feel sorry for the "wokesters." When the pendulum swings the other way, as it sooner or later inevitably will, I don't think they're going to like it much. It's going to be quite traumatic for them.
Load More Replies... Zophra 3 years ago
Why not just immediately ask the person what they meant by that? And then take it from there.
Lorie Shewbridge 3 years ago
Right! If I’d been there and didn't understand (which I do know the commercial) I’d just have turned around, looked him in the eye and said, “Excuse ME!”
Load More Replies... Noriki Tatakino 3 years ago
People just need to STOP. After all CONTEXT MATTERS. On what planet does getting chocolate in peanut butter become even remotely sexual in the context of “this marketing proposal coupled with this sales pitch will really cut costs and drive revenue” ? And what happened to “I don’t understand what you mean, can you clarify?” As a suitable response?
NicNor5560 3 years ago
HR is also in the wrong here. For taking her complaint, for not understanding, and the way the guy was treated.
Load More Replies... Paul Davis 3 years ago
This reminds me of the elderly janitor who was fired from his job at a middle school because he loved to sing the incredibly innocent "Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's Off To Work We Go" song from children's film "Snow White", which he had been doing for literally decades until then. Inexplicably, no on in the school administration had ever seen the movie nor heard of the song and simply assumed he was somehow singing a song about prostitutes.
Elsie 3 years ago
You really do have to be careful what you say these days although it was a commercial it wasn't slang. I would have been confused too but I will say this I wish more people wouldn't be scared to clarify or say that they are offended before going to hr or management. The person should have given this guy a chance to apologize or explain what it meant instead of causing trouble
NicNor5560 3 years ago
I don't agree. We shouldn't have to think what the others will think before saying something, unless, of course, you mean to hurt or you know you will hurt. The OP should not apologize; he was not out of line - the lady was.
Load More Replies... harry Henderson 3 years ago
"but it made me feel old and misunderstood". So what is stopping them from complaining to HR about being made to feel that way?
Allen Bouchard 3 years ago
Even if you don't know the reference, how deranged do you have to be to think that the phrase is in anyway sexual.
Bob Cakin 3 years ago (edited)
Peanut butter is a well know slang term for a woman who is "easy to spread" and is quite often used as a synonym for "sl*t". "Spread" here is referring to the spreading of one's legs. Chocolate is often used to describe black people (especially when referring to sex). So the phrase could technically be interpreted as: You're getting chocolate (a black man) in my peanut butter (sl*t, wh*re, etc.). So without the context of the commercial, it is actually pretty easy to interpret the phrase sexually given modern slang. Just because you don't know/use a lot of slang doesn't mean other people don't. Cultural misunderstandings like this are gonna happen. They're not "deranged". They just have a different background than you.
Load More Replies... Stephanie Paich 3 years ago
The solution is, instead of running to HR with every little problem you have, you TALK to the person and let them know what they said upset you. If it really had been inappropriate, she could have attempted to tell you to knock it off herself before running to tattle, would have saved a lot of time and embarrassment. I'm from an area where none of the workers ever would have gone to HR until they tried every possible other option of coming to an agreement with their coworker.
Xiaolinstyle 3 years ago
In this situation it isn't practical to assume that a young woman is going to be comfortable confronting an older man. But it is 100% her obligation to do the smallest amount of research or questioning before bolting to HR.
Load More Replies... Fat Harry 3 years ago
Bloody hell. We still make regular reference to "I 'ate you Buttler!" from On the Buses (which was a bloody awful program), "I'm freee!" from Are You Being Served? and "Don't Panic!" from Dad's Army. Hopefully no one takes offence at those.
Goth mouse (they/them) 3 years ago
I use “Don’t panic!” and “We’re doomed! Doomed!” all the time and im young 😅
Load More Replies... Hobby Hopper 3 years ago
I was once talking about the bugs chiggers at work, which if you don't know are a tiny type of mite common in the US South, and they will absolutely ruin your day (they get on you when you walk through brush or high grass and bite, embedding their mouth parts into the skin and causing intense itching). Someone thought the word "chigger" was a slur combining a nationality with another very ugly word for a person of African descent. Thankfully, they asked about it instead of going to HR, and all was well.
Bob Cakin 3 years ago
To be fair to them... that actually really does sound like it could be a racial slur. Glad they felt comfortable enough to talk to you for clarification first though! Shows that you must be a fairly nice person to work with!
Load More Replies... Jason Doakes 3 years ago
Just like those "adults" that complain about children "dressing provocately" are obviously sickos, this lady is clearly a perv, or heavily paranoid due to trauma. Where is the sexual innuendo in Peanutbutter and chocolate? Real victims are treated with suspicion and incredulity because of mentally diversely abled people like this lady.
Goth mouse (they/them) 3 years ago
Um… what’s sexual about peanut butter? i dont think i want to know 😬
Aliquid 3 years ago
Peanut butter isn't the factor. The person heard "you got your ___ in my ___" and they thought it was sexual. Fill in the blanks with anything and they would claim it is sexual.
Load More Replies... TJ Wilkins 3 years ago
I’m sooo glad that I don’t have to work with the newest generation!!! I am constantly making pop-culture references AND constantly googling new phraseology. I agree with the original writer: I absolutely was aware of generations of slogans, etc when I was in my 20s. Even worse I watch a lot of old movies so I am aware that the phrase ‘that’s white of you’ is actually a reference to the the concept that the bad guys always wore black and the good guys white in movies. But yes I’m smart enough to not say that in public - have been reemed in my own house by sons girlfriend so that was an education for both of us. I think this Gen Z (or whatever) is the most self-consumed generation yet and refuses to realize that older generations (30 & over) don’t necessarily mean anything derogatory and simply need to be made aware that some things are inappropriate. But then A LOT are just looking for a problem, like something as silly as chocolate in peanut butter.
Vivian Ashe 3 years ago
It seems so odd to me that someone would go to HR about a comment when they don't even know what it means. If I were in a meeting and someone said something that was obviously some kind of reference, I think I'd say something like, "Huh? I don't get it." Or I would go look it up on the internet later. Or ask one of my coworkers if they know what it means. Why go to HR and create tension as your first response?
Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
Why didn't this girl just ask him what it meant? Or ask somebody else? She goes straight to HR assuming he's being pervy? Way to stifle creativity. People can't say anything anymore. The world is not that serious. Gen Z is supposed to have some levity. Where is it here?
Alexis 3 years ago
I don't see why "you've got your chocolate in my peanut butter" is a sexually charged remark... As a fellow woman who has not heard of this commercial before, I wouldn't think so but would pobably be confused. Maybe she should get her head out of the gutter!
John Baker 3 years ago
And how is someone who works in advertising not aware of one of the most popular and successful ad campaigns of the late 20th century?
Load More Replies... Brian bell 3 years ago
This is a tough one because it does seem that the art of conversation, and with it, the ability to miscommunicate here and there - without offending someone - is getting lost. For example, here, the OP mentions it was a "teaching experience." For him? To not joke around anymore? Did the woman apologize for overreacting? Does she even care?
Bob Cakin 3 years ago (edited)
Wtf do you mean overreacting? All that happened was a HR meeting to clear up the misunderstanding. OP doesn't say anything like, "she threw a book at me and called me a sexist right there in the meeting!" Just that she chose to hold in her thoughts and deal privately with their misunderstanding through HR (which is the whole point of HR). And it's very easy to see how the phrase could be interpreted sexually given what "peanut butter" and "peanut butter legs" means in slang. (Hint: peanut butter is often used to refer to women who's legs are "easy to spread" aka... women who have a lot of sex)
Load More Replies... TheReader19 3 years ago (edited)
Here's a dumb idea, if someone says something don't understand, ask to explain it. If it's innocent then the misunderstanding's cleared up; if it's sexual innuendo then there going to be caught out
Geoff 3 years ago
Everyone has their own frame of reference to the world around them. There's nothing inherently bad about a good-natured cultural reference that is misunderstood. I think the larger gap is a failure to communicate. If he saw she was confused, OP could have taken the time after the meeting to explain the reference to her... or if the young woman didn't understand the comment, she could have approached the OP after the meeting to request clarification. The act of going to HR feels like an unnecessary escalation to a simple misunderstanding. Talk to each other... and stop assuming the worst in others... you might find the world is a happier place after all.
TrickQuestion 3 years ago
Another incident that could have been solved with a simple "huh? What do you mean?"
Casey McAlister 3 years ago
This whole situation might have been avoided if his colleague, instead of jumping to her own conclusions and acting on them, just asked him to explain what he meant. I could understand if it was clearly something sexual, inappropriate and offensive, but it wasn't, so maybe if you don't understand it, just ask, no? Communication is the key.
YetAnotherSarah 3 years ago
I'm old enough/confident enough to either directly call someone out or simply feign ignorance ("I don't understand. Explain that to me.") until we're *all* uncomfortable. But if I really didn't understand, I'd google that s**t before bringing it up with HR.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
Welcome to the world where everyone is offended by everything.
Gary Hanson 3 years ago
Once in a meeting I finished what I was saying and was asked if I was done. I replied that yes I had shot my wad. I am into history. I my mind was the fact that wading is the last thing to leave a cannon barrel. I looked around saw some of the attendees wide eyed. Then I blushed. But in a professional setting I don't think that way.
censor 3 years ago
no dude even in the 1890s "shooting your wad" out of your "cannon" could easily be misconstrued.
Load More Replies... Laura Radle 3 years ago
I know this is going to get me into hot water. Sorry, I'm sexually harassing water. But anyway, she apparently had sex on her mind, to think this was harassment. (If you know what I mean). No I not going to explain. This generation best get over themselves, they are creating stupidity to be normal.
Daytriker T 3 years ago
Have people literally become THAT sensitive or are they just plain stupid? God forbid, I ever hire one of those precious little cupcakes, I'd have to completely change my vocabulary from Archie Bunker to Homer Simpson.
John Baker 3 years ago
They're both overly sensitive *and* just plain stupid.
Load More Replies... Tony Payson 3 years ago
I remember we used to say, "Never trust anyone over 30." Now it's, "Never trust anyone under 30."
Evelyn Ann 3 years ago
Absolutely ridiculous that default for not understanding something is it must be a pointed remark at me. Im 35 and know commercial jingles from 1950s etc. It really is a shining example of how far the pendulum has swung and it's definitely NOT for the better. I should not have to watch my every remark. People need to first be not so g-d sensitive and secondly ask if one doesn't understand instead of default to being offended. Asking for clarification is key to communication. Our current generation instead chooses to immediately be butthurt and cry to someone else instead of choosing to be emotionally intelligent. "I don't understand so they must be harassing me" is actually a concise way to sum up gen Z. Lack of awareness outside of oneself plus unearned outrage all wrapped up in one.
Scott Wittig 3 years ago
This newer Gen is also the most hypocritical as they love their rap/hip-hop/pop that is all about calling women whores (hoe) sexualizing, nasty rape dreams , and murder. Oh but don't use something from the 80s that wasn't even meant as such.
Kantami Blossom 3 years ago
People seriously need to educate themselves better, being from the 80's isn't an excuse not to know a catchphrase I once used a catchphrase surprising people because it was fae a guy the died in the 60's over 20 years before I was even born.
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)
Three snaps up in a Z formation to the person who referenced In Living Color! On another note, a quick Google search, and the young woman could’ve found the reference, and saved everyone a whole lot of grief over nothing. Think—-and research—-before going to such an extreme. A basic critical thinking skill that college is supposed to teach you. If you were paying attention and not looking for ways to contrive a false victimhood for yourself, that is. There are true victims out there, and you only cast unfair doubts on their efforts to overcome and eradicate the systemic issues that truly victimize them—-besides, the majority of genuine victims don’t call, or even consider, themselves victims, but the strongest of survivors. The young woman in this entry really needs to get her head out of her a*s, come out of her bubble, and join the rest of us out here in the real world.
Shawn Baymiller 3 years ago
So the person didn't want to look stupid in front of everyone in the meeting and files an HR complaint potentially making themselves look stupid in front of the whole company if the complaint somehow got out. Smart. Speaking of gaps between generations, I often wonder if more recent generations took grammar classes. The author pluralized managers, parents and grandparents when they're already pluralized. It's not managers's.
John Baker 3 years ago
Gen Z doesn't think silly things like spelling, grammar, punctuation, formatting or even using the correct word are important. ;-)
Load More Replies... PaxScientia 3 years ago
I'm sorry, but if she heard that phrase and thought she was being sexually harassed, she was just looking for something to complain about.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
I agree. People who want to complain will always find a reason.
Load More Replies... Zero 3 years ago
I don't know how anyone over 20 couldn't know of it. It has completely permeated pop culture and is still referenced at some point in just about every show!
Tony Campbell 3 years ago
Im a genxer and if i want to dog whistle i will and the feminist movement bunch can kiss my a*s!
Krista mccurry 3 years ago
My husband was manager if a sales team. They were doing an all day meeting and my husband asked, “what they wanted for lunch.” The people in the meeting were of all ages. They started sing singing a line for a commercial that was still airing on tv. “Five dollar footling”. Some woman who was older than my husband complained to HR. Apparently Hr didn’t know about the commercial either.
Monique Gordon 3 years ago
Someone was telling me that their friend was gay and I interrupted by saying the classic line “not that there’s anything wrong with that “as per Seinfeld episode and they were totally offended. Ugh, I couldn’t even be bothered
Josie Sangione 3 years ago
No soup for you! Omg, Seinfeld is just FILLED with the best quotes.
Load More Replies... Joe calbery 3 years ago
Gen Z has been taught that their feelings trump absolutely everything, including common sense. It's not their fault, it is the fault of a society that gives both winners and losers trophies, instead of motivating individuals to succeed. Also, I would have asked how that Reese's jingle could possibly be in any way sexual innuendo
Daniel LaDue 3 years ago (edited)
It's sad that this guy had to tip toe, and say it was a "teachable moment", like he is the one who needs to adjust. How about the young, dumb, or easily upset ask questions before they tattle?
RADUGA.babochka 3 years ago (edited)
I'm a teen and I know old references because of my ma' and g-man talking about stuff from years back. It kinda showing how lots of younger people don't know certain stuff. Everything now is always taken to offence which is annoying as hell even if I'm on their side; They can get really extreme tbh- and why does everything to them have to sound bad?! 🙄
J. Brelner 3 years ago
If she was confused about the phrase, she should have asked about it at the meeting, not tattling to HR. What a snowflake.
Beth Ellis 3 years ago
I work in HR and had to investigate a sexual harassment complaint by an elderly client towards a male staff member. He was making small talk about the Xmas gifts he received from him mum and joking that she still buys him boxer shorts. The elderly person interpreted the conversation as him telling her a story of how he taught his mum to "give head" at Xmas, and filed a complaint. The brand name of the boxer shorts his mum gave him was Head Shorts.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I give you so much credit because I don't think I could have kept a straight face once I heard the entire story and figured out the confusion.
Load More Replies... Bi-Polar Express 3 years ago
I remember when you could know about stuff that happened before your time and you weren't considered a witch! You have the internet now and you refuse to educate yourself about the recent past. Or say, hey, I don't know that. What does it mean? This works for both people being crude and people innocently repeating a very popular commercial.
Porpoisepower 3 years ago
Twitter, and other social media services that treated you for making hard lined reactionary judgements has made society incompatible with nuance. People don't want to listen to the concerns of people they disagree with. We are f'ed.
Alma Muminovic 3 years ago
I mean there is a bit of a sexual undertone in that commercial otherwise they wouldn’t have used a man and a female as the actors. Just saying. 🤷🏼♀️
John Baker 3 years ago
The one I remember was two guys. In those days, I doubt there were any "sexual undertones."
Load More Replies... Jay Walsh 3 years ago (edited)
The problem I have here, and I would of made clear and possibly made my own complaint at the time. She didn't bother to ask you about it/seek clarifcation before running to HR. I would of just asked, so..when you use a phrase I don't understand being older (example, TL;DR) should I just run to HR and claim you either racism or ageism on your part, or should i ask you to clarify? Then point out, this is a reason for "friction" between generations, and it's not always the older person at fault. The instant assumption of racism, without any attempt at clarification (literally a google search on the phrase would of been enough here), is in and of itself, racist....
Nicholle Carriere 3 years ago
An older colleague and I used to make Monty Python jokes at work (I'm Canadian). We mostly got confused looks from our younger colleagues, but a few became addicted to Monty Python as a result.
Josie Sangione 3 years ago
Dead! Dead! Bring out your dead! But I'm not dead! You will be soon. (Clunk)
Load More Replies... MediumPimpin 3 years ago
I'm glad I work in a professional environment where we can openly flirt and tell each other to f themselves. I told my manager to go sh1t in his hat once. It got a good laugh.
Bravo6Two 3 years ago
Not only did they use it in the 80's, didn't they also run a similar campaign in the late 90's, early 00's? I remember similar commercials on tv from that period....regardless, not only is it an old trend, it's one that's been used in different decades.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
Yea it definitely must have been reused because I instantly realized it from my teens which would have been early 00's.
Load More Replies... David Nyman 3 years ago
What about the phrase, "Not a problem?" Does anyone else get offended when they are told that?
Coleman Berg 3 years ago
Ignorance, same thing that killed off the “witches” in Salem.
Load More Replies... Colin Idris Williams 1 year ago
This got me thinking of BURGER KING, WH when they opened in the Uk they had a promotion where if you said either " you need two hands just to hold that thing" or " it's so big you gotta grin to get it in" to the counter staff you'd get a free Whooper. They were the advertising catch lines... No one minded.
Andrew Bridge 3 years ago
Jeez, I'm english and I know that reference. I think we only got reeces on our shelves last year (outside of the "american stuff" areas)
StarlightPanda! 3 years ago
Unfortunately it hasn't changed enough. Some (too many) employers (as well as people) don't take this stuff seriously when it's an actual problem.
Lisa Mack 3 years ago
Didn't Family Guy use this in a side gag one episode (I seem to remember a police officer and a car accident) so that'd be the 2000s and not even an 80s reference
l bee 3 years ago
Two guys got in a car accident and the cop shot them both in the head to take the idea. There was more to it then that, but I don't remember. It's been a long time since I saw it.
Load More Replies... Coleman Berg 3 years ago
The same young people who crank their car stereos so that I get to hear some “superstar” talk rhythmically over a drum machine beat about her genitals and how she uses them are cowering in fear from loose talk of combining chocolate and peanut butter in a commercially available confection. The world is in deep doodoo.
Carol Lewis 3 years ago
I am aware that there are cases of real harassment but there are some people who are just looking for it so they can have a reason to be indignant. Its tiresome to work with someone like that.
Squirrelly Panda 3 years ago
When referring to old pop culture to people significantly younger, I usually preface it with a comment on what I'm referring to. For example, "to quote that old candy commercial, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter." This way, even if they don't get the quote, they have an idea of where it came from, and it opens up the option to ask for details if wanted.
Matthew Stark 3 years ago
I'm in my fifties. I was hanging out with my niece and nephew, both in their mid teens. I told my nephew to quit acting goofy as he was teasing his sister. He got so upset with me. Apparently, the word goof today is someone who is a either a pedophile, rapist or the beater of those who are vulnerable... Great. 😬 And yeah, I asked, 'So what's Disney's Goofy?' I give up.
John Baker 3 years ago
I confess I wouldn't have been nearly as understanding as the OP. Homie don't play that.
Will Sowers 3 years ago
Give it a decade or two, inter-human communication will be taboo. No safe steps left in the minefield.
Lumin Warraxxe 3 years ago
Idk what out of touch marketing firm he works for but for them to have some kids in the creation process that don't even recognize that jingle is a issue in and of itself.
Tyler Chicago 3 years ago
This man should review what constitutes as harassment in the workplace. Because all that is needed to report to HR is if any party feels uncomfortable. You don't even need to be in the room when a comment is made to report to HR. He has a possible lawsuit if he wanted to act on it for interrogating him for what the phrase means making him feel uncomfortable about his age in the workplace which is also reportable to HR too bad his HR dropped the ball and helped cause that discomfort.
Tiredofpayingforothers 3 years ago
What most people who are easily offended don't understand, is the more they run to HR, the less others want to work with them. We had a woman at work who constantly ran to HR about the most innocent thinks. It got so bad they had to transfer her because everyone at our facility refused to work with her. Even all the other women refused to work with her.
Load More Replies... Monique Gordon 3 years ago
Friend said her brother came out on weekend as gay and I interrupted with “not that there is anything wrong with that”, per Seinfeld. She said she took offence and I was like ugh, I didn’t even bother to explain.
Ray Arani 3 years ago (edited)
I literally just showed my 11 year old this old Reese's commercial after using the phrase and confusing him. Its probably why this came up in my feed. What I don't understand is why this Gen Zer hadn't heard of Google. Like, seriously why didn't it occur to them to Google the slogan before reporting it? Particularly as someone who works specifically in marketing.
Izzy Curer 3 years ago (edited)
Reminds me of this: "On January 15, 1999, David Howard, an aide to the mayor of Washington D.C., used "niggardly" in reference to a budget. This apparently upset one of his black colleagues, who misinterpreted it as a racial slur and lodged a complaint." He had to resign.
Anthony Elleman 3 years ago
If an individual doesn't understand a statement and feels harassed that's a malfunction of their emotions; they should have felt stupid.
Sunny Summers 3 years ago
I think the commercial used in this is intentionally misleading. Why, out of ALL the other commercials for the same product with the same tag line, did you pick the one with a guy and girl? Like, really. Why?
Sunny Summers 3 years ago
I think that the one commercial clip you decided to use in this story is intentionally misleading! Why did you pick, out of ALL the other commercials for the same product with the same tag line, one that has a guy and girl? I mean, really. Why?
FailBunny17 3 years ago
😅 As a person that relies heavily on referencing to socialize, this and all the comments terrify me greatly. *shuts door, accepts life as a recluse from now on*
Mtg Wolfie 3 years ago
One of the other people in the meeting should've used McDonald's jingle.
Houseof No 3 years ago
If it helps, most sexual harassment cases require the plaintiff to demonstrate a "pattern of behavior." One innocuous statement or joke is not likely to land someone in hot water. Most courts use a "reasonable person" benchmark. Would a "reasonable person" likely feel threatened or intimidated by this speech or behavior. Telling one racist or sexist joke may show poor judgement, but it almost never amounts to a hostile work environment by itself. Luckily most courts are aware of this. It's not meant to create unfair hurdles to filing complaints, but is meant not to clog the courts with lawsuits everytime an offensive remark is made.
Mike willett 3 years ago
This is stupid. These kids now get their feelings hurt over everything. People shouldn't have to walk around on eggshells because they might hurt your poor little feelings. I shouldn't have to give up my 1st amendment right because you're to in your feelings and can't handle it. And most of these girls that claim they were sexually harrassed at work are bug ugly fat girls who should feel lucky anyone spoke to them let alone made something that could be considered sexual. This is another reason people don't want to work a traditional job it's not so much the job but these young kids who've been coddled and and sheltered their whole lives and dunno how to act around regular people who don't care about their feelings.
Katrina Eden 3 years ago (edited)
There's a new gum commercial out that is sexually charged and their slogan is "Chew it before you do it." I have a problem with this slogan mainly because of the setting. It's in a woman's room with lots of dolls and the guy looks freaked out as he puts some gum in his mouth. They're not even trying to censor things anymore.
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I can't stand that commercial. Not just because of the line but because the dolls freak me out. They really couldn't have come up with something funny to go with it instead of overly cringey
Load More Replies... Analyn Lahr 3 years ago
They used to show that commercial on TV Land, back when was a new channel and showed the classics plus "retro-mercials".
Random Anon 3 years ago
Yeah I've also been accused of malicious intentions with common phrases, even on this very site. It appears if there is the slightest tinniest reason to take offense, there will be someone out there getting salty. Being an old geezer, I just don't care anymore. Go ahead and be offended when clearly there was no intention there. I just can't be bothered to walk on eggshells all the time for fear of some special person getting their feelings hurt. As we used to say, suck it up buttercup.
Sunny Day 3 years ago
We are a society of tattle tales. If someone says or does or posts anything that MIGHT be questionable, or that someone else just THINKS might be questionable, off to tattle they go. Moo-o-o-mmm! Suzy said niggardly! What are you going to do about it? (That means "cheap or stingy", if you grew up in a barn)
LennytheCat 3 years ago
Relating to Homie Don't Play Dat.....As a gay man, Homo Don't Play Dat has become a phrase with less and less relevance lol
Perry Sologia 3 years ago (edited)
What they gonna do,: sack you? You got to get legal with these people or they win.
Joshua Epperson 3 years ago
To be fair to the girl that original commercial came out 50 years ago in 1972. It's literally been half a century since it was relevant and with the speed at which pop culture moves now it might as well have been the bronze age
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
I think they refused it though because I instantly remembered them having that commercial when he mentioned it and it was when I was a teen so early 00's? So still awhile ago, but not quite that long.
Load More Replies... Raq Ram 3 years ago
I hate Gen Z's culture and the entire generation. They are are vapid, boring, barely can read or write or follow directions or instructions. They cannot read a paper map, do basic math in their head, or process sarcasm. They are completely disabled without their smartphones and cannot participate in idle chit chat in a grocery line to be friendly. They go online to rage about unresolved world issues and "cancel" people to suppress all forms of free thinking or 1st Amendment speech. This is an effed up generation and past generations need to band together and revolt this nonsense before they erase all forms of creativity, morality and humanity of the past forever. *gets off soapbox*
Bravo6Two 3 years ago
I mean, they can't afford to move out anywhere, but it somehow thier fault that houses that went for 200k a few years ago are going for 1M$+ too. Right? That soapbox made your a*s look big
Load More Replies... Sean Stimson 3 years ago
I don't even understand why people are taking issue with this story. There was a misunderstanding between two employees, HR investigated and cleared the matter up, nobody was reprimanded, etc., and everyone had a chuckle over it. Things worked exactly as they should. What's the problem?
Kaiti Yoder 3 years ago
Personally, my issue with it is she didn't know whether it was or not and didn't bother even trying to find out before going to HR. She could have at least asked someone or googled it first.
Load More Replies... LH25 3 years ago
I go back and forth a bit. On one hand, I wonder why the younger woman didn't ask what the older guy meant before going to HR. But then I kind of get her not being comfortable doing that. I actually reported a co-worker for harassment some years back, his was blatant. HR told me that I had to have told him that the conduct and comments were not welcome before they could get involved.
Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
She didn't have to ask him. She could have asked one of the other colleagues who seemed to get the joke. Or God forbid- done a google search. Before threatening a man's job by going to HR.
Load More Replies... Sue User 3 years ago
I worked in an office that had a karge foreign workforce. I frequently use colloquialisms : "the whole nine yards". Colleague asked me what it meant. We found a website that would translate for her - though I did try to limit them going forward. On the flip side ( oops) , I love urban dictionary.
David Andrews 3 years ago
The marketing woman is an idiot, however this guy needs relax a bit. The woman overreacted to nothing, and has made a fool of herself, and no doubt everyone at the office will be talking about that time she reported someone to HR for quoting a jingle that was in no way sexual. There is no need to jump straight to the "everyone is too PC now, we all have to police what we say" line. Laugh if off as a nonsense that happened at work from a young colleague, and unless you are actually likely to say something offensive for some reason, no need to worry before talking.
Alyssia Taylor 3 years ago (edited)
I know this is a reasonable topic, but I can't stop laughing at the "old and misunderstood" line. It just sounds like such a non-issue. I'd understand if it made him feel 'greasy' or 'predatory' or something, but ohhh noooo, he feels oLD aNd MisUnDeRsTOoD"😂😂
John Baker 3 years ago
Why should he feel "greasy" or "predatory?" It isn't his fault he was dealing with a total moron.
Load More Replies... Raq Ram 3 years ago
Thanks! I heard ant butts are in and the Gen Zs are actually offing themselves by going to other countries to get a cheaper deal to look like me. Yet they still mooch off mommy & daddy by living in their basement, attic, spare room, guest house, old childhood room or the garage. Funny how they spend ALL DAY AND NIGHT on their phones yet cannot figure out how to make in REAL LIFE. Such a weak bunch of whiny, arrogant, delusional weaklings that exemplify a "victim mentality"
Bob Cakin 3 years ago
Seriously... how the hell have absolutely none of you heard of "peanut butter legs"? Or just heard "peanut butter" be used as a way to describe women whose legs are "easy to spread"? Aka a woman who has a lot of sex. Seriously.. there's a bunch of songs referencing that slang! How have none of you heard this? It's really not that hard to see how saying you're getting chocolate (slang often used to refer to black people) in my peanut butter (slang often used synonymously with words like sl*t/wh*re) might be interpreted sexually.
Dominique Walton 3 years ago
Most food advertisements have a sexual undertone to sell more food. So I completely understand how she thought that without hearing the commercial.
Mary Rogers 3 years ago (edited)
The problem was not that he was misunderstood and had to explain himself, but that he was reported to HR. No wonder men are paranoid these days about getting accused of sexual harassment. If I were her I just would have looked at him funny and said, "I don't get it." That's if I didn't get the reference, which I do. I commend young women for standing up for themselves, but they also need to understand that misunderstandings happen and not automatically jump to conclusions. What if he had said something that wasn't a clear cultural reference but was simply misunderstood, therefore resulting in a ruined career? I speak from experience. I know someone this happened to.
Load More Replies... Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
Shizit. I'd never be able to say anything. I can't be responsible for every human beings "uncomfortable" feelings. Not being a douche- sure. But not saying a commercial line. Nope. It's up to you to toughen up in this case. I'm not living in a world of censorship. I'll try to be respectful. You try too. That means understanding I have freedom to speak- especially about chocolate and peanut butter for crimeny sake.
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