Finding the right person to spend the rest of your life with isn't about finding somebody who's perfect. It's about finding somebody who's perfect for you. Because as you can see from this hilarious list of marriage tweets compiled by Bored Panda, it's important for a healthy relationship to have a husband or wife who can handle all of your weird, annoying, and a downright unbearable sense of humor!
From the woman whose husband neglected gardening duties to buy the cat an inflatable unicorn horn, and hilarious marriage advice to the man whose wife forced him to go to IKEA despite the fact that they didn't need to buy anything, the collection of marriage jokes below is sure to make married life seem awesome. Don't forget to vote for the best pranks and funniest situations!
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My Wife Didn't Appreciate My Fridge Magnet Poem
Asked My Wife Where My Eye Drops Were. She Responded "In The Bedroom On The Tv Stand Under The Lightswitch Slightly Trapped Between The Wall"
For The Past Two Years, Anything Sitting In Our Garage That The Wife Says We Can't Get Rid Of, I've Hung As "Art" In Our Otherwise Useless Front Room
My Husband Sure Knows How To Make A Pregnant, Bloated Girl Feel Special On Her Birthday
You may not appreciate this now, but later on you'll cherish his thoughtfulness. Hugs-and-k...051928.gif
My Hubbys Reaction When He Tasted That I Added Whiskey To His Coffee
Wife And I Spend An Hour Trying To Get The Cat To Turn Off The Lights, So We Didn't Have To Get Out Of Bed
Told The Wife The Floor Was Gross And Needed Cleaning. Told Her I Was Willing To Do It. She Said We Don't Need To. Clean Half She Said And Let's See The Difference... Mission Accomplished. (We Don't Have Tiled Floors)
My Wife Has Been Trying Anything To Remind Me To Bring My Lunch To Work
Marriage Is All About Compromise. For Example, I Didn't Really Want A Dog. My Wife Did. So We Compromised... And Here Is Our New Puppy Copper
I Wore This Custom Shirt During My Wife's Labor. Wife Was Not Amused
After Working An 18 Hour Day, I Came Home To Find This Note Left By My Wife In The Bathroom
Whenever We Get Into A Heated Argument, My Wife Stops Mid Argument To Take A Selfie With Me, I'm Never Amused
What I Love About My Parents Is That After 41 Years Of Marriage, They Still Know How To Embarrass Their Kids
My Pregnant Wife Sent This To Me At 2:12am This Morning. I'm Going To Guess That My Snoring Was Quite Bad Last Night
So..I assume Huichol Indians women only had one pregnancy...(with the same companion )^^
When You Ask Your Husband To Pack Your Lunch
the way the apples and banana are laid out is too much for me to handle
I Needed To Borrow My Wife's Phone... She Said Her Password Was Our Anniversary. I Gave The Phone Back And Said I Didn't Know What Happened
We Were Looking Through Old Pictures Of Me When My Wife Started Laughing And Got The Dog's Flea Pills From The Cupboard
My Wife And I Accidentally Got Each Other The Same Gift For Our Second Anniversary
Marriage Milestone
My Wife Said I Could Decorate The Guest Bathroom As My Own. Multiple Screams Have Ensued
My Wife Includes Little Notes In My Lunch When She Packs It. I've Been Saving Them In My Desk
Married For 62 Years, But My Grandpa Will Still Pull Out His Road Atlas To Prove My Grandma Wrong
My Wife And I Do Not Lead A Very Exciting Life
Caught My Husband Red Handed... Thought He Was Working Out
Year No. 4 At My Wife's Family Reunion
Whenever I Asked My Husband What He Wanted For Dinner He Always Answered, "Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp And Asparagus With Hollandaise Sauce" Just To F*ck With Me. Today I Served Him This
My Wife Said This License Plate Made Her Think Of Me
Never Have I Been So Mad At My Wife Before
Marriage Is About Sharing (Almost) Everything
Trying To Sent Subtle Hints To My Wife Last Night
Do you see a bear in the middle climbing a rock or is it just me? ^^
When My Husband Shops Online For Me
My Husband Is An Asshole
I Love Making Cookies With My Wife
What's that old saying............"Flattery will get you Everywhere". Hugs-and-k...4de895.gif
My Husband Didn't Want A Birthday Cake
My Pregnant Wife Demanded I Go To The Store For Frozen Yogurt. I Was Temped To Play A Joke, But Wanted To Live
This Is What Happens When My Wife Leaves On A Business Trip And I'm Home Alone. When She's Home Vs. When She's Gone
My Husband Challenged Me To See If I Could Fit In My New Suitcase... I Sent Him This Response
Marriage Status
I Came Home To This Last Night. I Married The Right Woman
My Wife Hates Comic Book Movies. Thanks Universal
The "My Wife/Girlfriend Made Me Go To The Mall" Support Group Is Underway
I don't understand why they even go if they are not going to spend time together, but whatevs
My Husband Got Tired Of Wine Stains Everywhere So He Got Me A Sippy Wine Cup
I'm Starting A Fight With My Wife
Well if that's the meal you will offer to your wife I totally understand why she'll fight :)
Marry Your Best Friend
My Wife's New Hand Towel
I'm A Super Nervous Flyer. My Wife Just Took This Pic Of Me At The Airport Restaurant, About To Board The Plane A Part Of Our Honeymoon
Asked My Husband To (Hand) Whip Some Heavy Cream. Hear Strange Noises And Walk In On This
My Wife Wanted To Make Sure That Someone Took A Picture Of The Expression On Our Faces When Our Daughter Was Born Today. So I Took One
I can affirme that this couple have nothing related to Huichol Indians :D