Relationship Ends After Woman Won’t Let Partner’s Friend’s Crush Move In With Them Too

In theory, home is supposed to be a place where you feel the most comfortable, the most yourself, where you come to unwind and be safe. So, if you live with other people, you must be comfortable enough to share such an intimate space with them.

Today’s OP was of the same opinion. In her home, where she already lived with a partner and her daughter, there was an additional roommate — the partner’s friend, who was desperately seeking out one woman. When she ended her relationship with her SO and didn’t have a place to go, this man offered for her to stay with them, to the discontent of the woman and her daughter.

More info: Mumsnet

Since your home is supposed to be a place where you feel the most comfortable, you need to trust the people you live with

Couple sharing a happy moment outdoors, highlighting friendship dynamics related to a spare room usage situation.

Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

A household from today’s story consisted of the post’s author, her daughter, her partner, and her partner’s friend

Couple's friend occupies spare room, seeks approval for a female guest.

Text about a friend's crude comments about women, related to a couple's guest room situation.

Text about a couple's longtime friend hosting a woman in their spare room without their consent.

Text about a couple's friend using their spare room, mentioning airport lifts and expenses he covered for a woman.

Woman smiling in car, a man driving, symbolizing unexpected guests and shared spaces.

Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

This friend was a single man who was desperately trying to have a relationship with a woman who had friend-zoned him

Text explaining a friend's intention to get closer to a woman, leading to tension over a spare room arrangement.

Text about a couple's friend inviting a woman to stay with them, causing upset.

Text message about a friend inviting a woman to sleep in his room without discussing it first.

Text about a couple's upset feelings regarding their friend's decision to let a stranger live in their spare room.

Man in a plaid shirt on a bed, reading a book, contemplating about a situation involving a spare room and an unexpected guest.

Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The thing was that she was in a relationship with another man for 10 years and didn’t show that much interest in her friend, yet he didn’t give up

Text from an upset couple about a friend's guest using their spare room, mentioning issues of space and home office needs.

Text conversation about friend using a spare room and inviting a woman to stay, causing household upset.

Text discussing a couple upset with a friend using their spare room for a woman.

Text discussing a couple's upset over a friend's unfair request involving a spare room, questioning reasonableness.

Person in pink shirt looking upset while seated at a table, implying tension in a shared living situation.

Image credits: shurkin_son / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Then, one day, her long-term relationship ended, and she had no place to stay, so her friend offered to move in with him, and the author’s partner let him do so

Text update about ending a relationship due to longtime friend's actions.

Text on a reflective note about unhappiness and lack of love in a relationship.

Text about a couple's friend demanding an apology, discussing room use conflict and ignored communication.

Text message about staying in the house, gratitude for support regarding a spare room issue.

Text message update about a friend's negative reaction in a group chat.

Image credits: TrickySituation22

The post’s author and her daughter strongly disliked the idea and protested, as they didn’t want to live with a woman that they didn’t know

The OP’s family let their friend stay in their spare room. This dude, who they dubbed as Ray, is a single man in his late 30s. 

Nowadays, not all people in their 30s crave relationships. Some, for instance, take this freedom as a chance to travel solo, embark on various other kinds of adventures, and so on. Apparently, Ray isn’t one of them, as the post’s author noted that he keeps trying to find a girlfriend. 

A few years ago, he befriended a woman who, at the time, was with her partner for 10+ years. From the original poster’s point of view, this woman clearly kept Ray in her friendzone, using him for lifts to the airport, free meals, and things, letting him pay for everything, and hoping that would lead to something more, even though she was with her long-time partner. 

Let’s be honest, their friendship doesn’t sound like the most equal thing, does it? Theoretically, friendship should be about two people who are on the same level as each other, but in this case, it isn’t like that. It’s clear that the man wants more than that and is willing to literally pay for it, while the woman uses that fact. Well, who are we to judge? If it was working for them to stay friends, good for them. 

Then, one day, the woman split with her partner and had nowhere to go, so Ray invited her to stay with him while the OP’s partner allowed it. 

A couple sits on a couch, looking upset in a bright room, wearing blue shirts.

Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

What makes matters worse, apparently, this woman “has a lot of issues” (which the OP interpreted as her being the abuser of substances), which makes her even more sketchy of a possible roommate—if the stranger part wasn’t enough. 

So, it’s no surprise that neither the post’s author nor her daughter were thrilled to have this woman live with them. You know the rule that parents teach their children: “Do not open the doors to strangers.” Well, this situation is basically them not only opening their door but allowing the stranger to become a housemate. 

Home is usually not simply a physical but also a mental place where a person can be themselves and be in comfort without being surrounded by people they don’t know. So, letting a person you do not trust live there, too, defeats the whole purpose of home and terminates the comfort since, from that point on, there’s basically an alien living next to you. 

The original poster didn’t want that. Thus, she started protesting and looking for other places where the woman could stay, as long as it was not with them. She also checked with the netizens whether such a reaction made them unreasonable. Well, the consensus was clear—it didn’t—the reaction was completely justified. 

Later, in the update, the OP clarified that she found a way out of the situation—she ended her relationship with her partner. Realizing how enabling he was for his friend and his toxic ways proved that she didn’t love him that much anymore. What’s even better—now, both the ex-partner and his buddy Ray will have to move out, while the post’s author and her daughter will stay safe and comfortable in their own home. 

In our opinion, that’s the best way the situation could have turned out, isn’t it? Yes, it’s sad that the relationship ended, but since it evidently wasn’t the healthiest one, it’s probably for the best.

One thing led to another, and in an update on the post, the author said that she decided to leave her partner, as he seemed to be on his toxic friend’s side instead of hers

Text exchange about a spare room rental advice, mentioning searching for a new place with a daughter.

Text conversation about spare room, couple upset over friend inviting a woman without permission.

Comment questioning a partner's reason for letting a woman stay in their spare room.

Text messages reacting to a couple upset over friend inviting a woman to live in their spare room.

Comment criticizing a couple's upset reaction to a friend's roommate choice.

Text screenshot about a couple upset over their friend inviting someone to live in their spare room without permission.

Text exchange about house rules and guest boundaries in a shared home.

Comment discussing a friend's use of a spare room, suggesting he find his own place if he wants others to live with him.

Poll Question

Total votes ·

Thanks! Check out the results:

Total votes ·

Newsletter

Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls

Subscribe

By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.

Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!

Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!