“I Have 12 Felonies”: 82 Surprising Facts That Don’t Match People’s Looks At All

I became a lawyer at 22. I singlehandedly fought the governments of Nigeria and Malaysia to repatriate a trafficked girl back to Nigeria. I finally got her back and got her state government, through the then Attorney General, to place her in a rehabilitation program. She is currently the owner of a thriving restaurant and happily married. Also got an unexpected recognition as being among top 100 female lawyers in Africa in 2026.

Survived a near fatal stroke two years ago. Was paralyzed on my left side. Today I just walked three miles.

I’m a 73yo Marine Biologist Nana with 1000s of SCUBA research dives in some of the most remote places in the Pacific under my belt and I’m still diving.

I earned two master’s degrees and became a college professor before the age of 30. Currently 31.

Despite being a big mama, I’ve gone mountain climbing in Australia and Ghana. I am also one of about 300 African American women who have a bachelor’s degree in nuclear engineering.

I worked on cable ships and installed the internet on the ocean bed. Then I worked as a rocket scientist and published silly little poetry book. And was in two pirate attacks.

I run a non-profit garden group.

Former college drop out x2
Former tv scriptwriter
Former bouncer
Former HS science teacher
Started med school at 36yo
Now a pediatric neurologist

I rehabilitate dogs so dangerous that grown men are afraid to go near them.

I'm a therapist, who was born female.

I do European sword fighting as a hobby.

Despite looking like a roadie for Motörhead, I am a classically trained pianist and Beethoven is god.

US Army Sargent survived an RPG attack in Iraq, driver, mechanic by trade.

I performed in Rocky Horror for 30 years, retiring in March. I also did burlesque for 5 years.

I used to be the vocalist in a metal band.

I bake cookies.

I have been charged with over 15 felonies, now I have a salary job and just received a 12k increase.

I cry easily at touching moments in movies and tv shows.

I used to be a Baptist missionary.

I am an accomplished tournament poker player.

The fact that I'm a hetero American white man that looks like this and am an unabashed progressive is a pretty good one.

I first flew a plane by myself at 16 years old, I studied mathematics in school and also have an MBA. Oh and I survived cancer.

Despite being 4’11 and presenting as a baddie, I love tuner cars and work at a performance shop.
I worked 6 years as a fighter jet mechanic too.

I was a Certified Nursing Assistant for 6 yrs. Best job I ever had.

My sister and I were raised on the Navajo Reservation in NW New Mexico.

I hold a national championship title in clogging (a form of dance originating from the Appalachian region)

Firefighter in training…volunteer…age 53.

I’m a professional stuntwoman for television and film.

I’ve won beauty competitions.

I started my own woodworking business last September and used to drive + manage a 32ft food truck.

I was in both the US Navy and the US Army.

I have made adult men cry on call of duty.

I'm a 60-yr old overweight grammee who started lifting about 4 years ago. This year I deadlifted 245 lbs.

My job is keynote speaking but my hobby is rehabilitating orphaned and injured African bats.

I look like a quirky historian (and I am). But I'm also a professional sword swallower and fire water who's entertained Lil Kim, Usher, and Amy Sedaris.

Got voted MVP in a ren faire’s rugby game.

I was a 91H Tracked Vehicle Mechanic in the Army. (In civilian terms, I worked on the tanks lol)

I hold a Class A CDL, drove big rigs and buses for years. I have also written 20 novels and more than 100 short stories, most very spicy. And i have no eardrums and no mylinen sheath on my nerves (same problem Alan Jackson is fighting)

I was a Crime Scene Cleanup Technician. Cleaning up blood and brain matter.

I camp in some of the most remote areas of the wilderness in the US, often in rather extreme climates, and more recently helped an injured hiker with a sprained ankle down a mountain in a 95°F (35°C) desert heat.

I am not, in fact, related to Ben Franklin.

I have two national championship titles in steel tip darts.

I've held a speech in the UN General Assembly in front of all nations.

I scream in a metalcore band.

I’ve been to the Democratic Republic of Congo over 20 times for at least 2 weeks at a time and speak the local language, Lingala.

I won an award for organic chemistry and have a national title in competitive rock climbing.

My official title is doctor (though I never use it) and I go pretty hard in a STEM field.

I race cars as a hobby and have 15 years training using Japanese samurai swords.

Me and my endless supply of cardigans look like I belong in a classroom teaching but I work in pathology cutting up and examining human organs all day.

I was a ballerina.

Placed 1st in 3 world championship figure skating events and I'm a cancer survivor.

In college I was recruited by an intelligence agency to be an interrogator.

I absolutely love to photograph plants and insects as i walk through life. I find love in each one of them and sometimes I cry because of the beauty and wisdom they radiate.

I used to do dental work for the Navy. No one ever thinks I’m a veteran. They see our disabled vet plates and think it’s my husband.

I grew up on a farm and I have a degree in theology.

I am over 60 and still play Softball three nights a week and tournaments every other weekend! I’m the oldest person on every team, I play on but still give those kids a run for their money! I can still hit it to the fence.

I can do backflips and walk on my hands. ( as a tall guy nobody expects it )

We're bassist and guitarists in a post-hard-core band.

A little over 5 years ago I got a stem cell transplant to basically cure my cancer.
But this is my version of vacation, walking up 1,200m on skis from a sailboat.

I have a second degree black belt in karate and was ranked fourth in the nation at 16.

I have 12 felonies and spent time in prison.

I write horror stories and my dream is to be a published author, under a different name.

I have a masters degree in computer science and I’m also a master beekeeper and I run marathons for fun.

I was transferring inmates out of state to another jail facility.

I own a complete set of Arden Shakespeare Series III editions.

Believe it or not we are in fact 100% FDT.

I was questioned by a Russian spy after giving a talk about my company’s work with NASA at the museum of science - he was trying to phish classified info about space travel materials. My company later got me secret security clearance.

I don't drink. (never did) I don't smoke. (never did) I've never tried any type of [illegal substances]. And I LOVE Taylor Swift.