Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Sister-In-Law Played Petty Games With Wedding Footage, Woman Decides To Get Revenge
Bride and groom posing for photos at outdoor wedding surrounded by guests capturing moments on smartphones, wedding revenge controversy.
74

Sister-In-Law Played Petty Games With Wedding Footage, Woman Decides To Get Revenge

Interview With Author

41

ADVERTISEMENT

Wedding photos help us remember our big day even years after the fact. And most couples are willing to spend a pretty penny on it. According to The Knot, the average cost of a wedding photographer in the U.S. is $2,900. Coupled with $1,900-$2,100 for a videographer, you’d hope that even your second cousin’s dog is in the pictures.

But not this bride. She excluded her husband’s entire family from her wedding photos. So, when the time came for the SIL’s wedding, the bride came up with a petty strategy to get back at the woman tenfold.

Bored Panda reached out to the bride-to-be, u/noodinthegarden, and she kindly agreed to tell us why she felt justified in her plan and whether she still intends to carry it out. Read our conversation with the author below!

RELATED:

    A bride excluded her husband’s family from wedding photos, angering the SIL

    Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    So, during her own wedding, the SIL came up with a plan to trick her into thinking she’ll be in all the photos

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Samantha Gades / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Getúlio Moraes / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    Image credits: noodinthegarden

    ADVERTISEMENT

    “The people criticizing me for not letting it go? They’re probably on the wrong subreddit,” the bride told Bored Panda

    Even to this day, more than four years later, the bride believes her SIL excluded her and her family from her wedding photographs on purpose. “After asking kindly twice in 2021, fast-forward to May 2023 – same question, same answer, and she basically gaslit me by acting like the photos didn’t exist.”

    “But I know they do,” the author of the post reiterates. “I watched them being taken. So yes, I believe it was intentional. It seemed like a very clear choice to exclude the groom’s side of the family.”

    “We all traveled a long way to be there, and she made it very obvious that we didn’t matter to her,” the bride says, emphasizing the thing about the SIL’s behavior that hurt most.

    u/noodinthegarden’s post received mixed reactions, with many people saying that the bride should focus on her wedding and not some petty revenge drama. But the Redditor tells Bored Panda she wasn’t surprised to receive such reactions.

    “I know she was intentionally being petty on her wedding day, and not just to one person, but the entire groom’s side. The people criticizing me for not letting it go? They’re probably on the wrong subreddit.”

    At the same time, she admits that some details of her plan might be a little too much. “After reading the feedback, I do think that assigning the videographer a special job to make her ‘feel seen’ might be a bit dramatic. I could just ask him not to include her in the final video and leave it at that.”

    “Posting the story a little early definitely opened the floodgates for unsolicited advice, though!” the bride adds.

    In the end, u/noodinthegarden believes her SIL deserves what’s coming to her. “Even though I’m on my healing journey, I’m not going to pass up what feels like the only opportunity for equal treatment. This is my one and only petty crime,” she says.

    The Redditor isn’t affected by people saying she’s stooping to her SIL’s level. “This isn’t about her being the main character in my story. She isn’t. People commenting that she’s ‘living in my head rent-free’ really don’t get it.”

    Couples should let people know beforehand if they’re not going to be in the wedding portraits

    Image credits: Kenny Eliason / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    When deciding who will be in your wedding photos, photographers and planners advise making a comprehensive list. It should include all the combinations of who will be posing with whom.

    It’s not unusual to exclude distant relatives like second cousins, aunts, and uncles from taking portraits. If the bride and groom don’t have a close relationship with them, it’s natural to prioritize other family members with whom they get along better and want memories to be preserved.

    If there are people you don’t wish to be a part of the portrait-taking process, it’s important to have these conversations before the wedding. Moesia Davis of Mo Davis Fine Art Photography told The Knot that sometimes significant others get excluded from family portraits.

    But if you handle the conversation with grace prior to the photoshoot, there shouldn’t be any problems. She recommends giving a short explanation about your decision and offering some compromise if they don’t take it really well.

    At the end of the day, a wedding is about what the happy couple wants. “My job is not to please your wedding guests,” Davis says. “My job is to make sure the wedding day is seamless and to honor you, the couple, and your time.”

    Preparing for the wedding photoshoot beforehand should make the process easier

    Image credits: Mariah Krafft / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    Wedding planning takes a lot of time and effort. Deciding who to include in family photos is yet another decision that the bride and groom have to make.

    On average, wedding photographers take from 800 to 1,500 photographs. Family portraits make up a nice chunk of that number.

    Most photographers and wedding planners advise prioritizing the immediate family. Parents and children should be the first ones to get portraits together and separately with the bride and groom. Then it’s the bridesmaids and groomsmen, grandparents, siblings, godparents, and other important people in the couple’s lives.

    To make the process smoother, some photographers might ask for a list beforehand. Preparation is key, New York City-based wedding photographer Jenny Fu told Brides. “Each grouping takes around three to five minutes to organize, so it’s essential to build this time into your timeline.”

    Sometimes, one of the guests might be of huge help when it comes to making things smoother. “Nominate someone to help your photographer by grabbing all the right people for each shot,” Olivia Velarde, director of Wedgewood Weddings, says. “A family member in the wedding party will usually know everyone and can help wrangle guests!”

    Again, it’s okay to say “No” to some family members being in the photos. Editor Ellen O’Brien at Brides emphasizes that it’s completely acceptable not to want people you don’t get along with to be in your wedding photos.

    “If you don’t have a close relationship with an extended family member, it’s perfectly fine to leave them out of family photos.”

    Commenters had even more petty suggestions: “Don’t give her enough forks”

    Yet some people thought the bride was spending too much time and energy making her wedding about someone else

    Others, on the other hand, enjoyed the pettiness: “Good for you”

    A few people shared similar wedding drama stories

    Poll Question

    Total votes ·

    Thanks! Check out the results:

    Total votes ·
    Share on Facebook

    Explore more of these tags

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    Read less »
    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

    Read less »

    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

    What do you think ?
    Paul C
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It sounds to me that neither woman is mature enough to be married.

    Wild Cream
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don’t care lol OP sounds fun. I’d take her for a drink.

    Load More Replies...
    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In my family we're all split apart because the family if full of drunks and a holes. So 2 of us eloped instead of having to share the limelight with them.

    Dusty's mom
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it was just revenge for what she did to you the plan might be top heavy. But she ignored your whole family! Leave her out. It may save having her removed if she and bro divorce.

    Tabitha
    Community Member
    10 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not if, but when. Unless bro is brain dead or just as assholish as his wife, he will wake up one day.

    Load More Replies...
    Sandra Moon
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is genius level revenge. Maybe it is childish, as some people have said, but it's fun. SIL needs a taste of her own medicine

    Andrew Arons
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just hope that OP continues to use her revenge powers in the service of Good instead of E-vil.🤪

    Load More Replies...
    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While I like the pettiness, it feels weird to expend this much energy on someone else for your wedding. I'd just ask the photog to not focus on her and then just remove any pictures she was in rather than have them "pretend" she was getting a ton of attention. Like, I'd rather that effort go to my actual wedding. And is it really revenge if she caused OP to do all this on her special day?

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was there an update?

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where’s fluffy pink when u need here lol she’s ace with finding updates , cos I want one to

    Load More Replies...
    R Dennis
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would not want anything to do with either of these toddlers.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is op even asking her sil for pics? She should ask her own brother who presumably wanted pics of his family. No? Then that’s the problem, not the sil.

    Robin Roper
    Community Member
    10 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For my BIL's wedding, we, his family, were told to be at the church two hours early for family photos. Bride, sister the MoH, and their mother didn't show up until 15 minutes before the ceremony. While we waited, the photographer, who was a friend, said “Let’s take some family photos of you all.” So that’s what he did. SIL and her family were super pissed there were so many photos of us. None of us have seen any of the photos. Take a witch to know a witch.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oi do not insult us witches ! We are lovely people , not inhumans !like that kind are thank you very much !

    Load More Replies...
    Ellen Samberg
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Had it happen to me. Cousin's son's Bar Mitzvah. Came in from out of town. Was me, my brother, sister, and nephew. Had to arrive early for family photos at the temple, then again before the dinner party... outside, in the summer, in St. Louis (very hot and humid). Did it all graciously, and got him a great gift. Then, when the "album" was sent out, we only appeared in candid photos where we were in the background of shots of other people at the party. Really stung, but that's family for you.

    David Sallis
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Indifference is the cruelest cut of all

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Love it ! but op your wedding is YOUR WEDDING NOT THAT TRAMPS lovely , lovely idea but don’t let it play out have a fantastic day , ignore the s k a n k ,(she won’t be in your families life long once your brother realisies what a vile woman he’s married ) n just get her taken out ALL the pics after ! Until then no more thoughts of that thing , oh n update please , blessed be x.

    Sarah Belt
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm with Ilovecoffeeandpuns. I can sympathize with OP being upset, but I don't think turning OP's own wedding into a revenge will result in the emotional satisfaction OP deserves or really wants. 10 years down the line, I'd want to just have great photos & videos instead of paying a professional to focus on someone else. OP is literally paying someone to do a bad job.

    Iseley
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At my wedding there were TONS of pictures taken. However I wasn't in any by myself only a few with my husband and a total of 3 of the rest of my family. The rest? My husband his friends and his parents friends. Should've paid attention when we had to shrink the guest list and in lieu of my MIL random friends whom I had never heard of she said that we should cut my guest list. 4 were bridesmaids. The other one? My dad. PS We are now divorced ( happily on my end)

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is gonna get REAL interesting when kids appear on the scene.

    Brian Droste
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know if this would make SIL feel guilty or not but OP should take a as many pictures of SIL and post them all over social media. Maybe make SIL look like a fool for not taking any pictures of OP and sharing them. That is the best revenge I could think of. Maybe other family members might start questioning why are there no pictures of OP family. See what excuses SIL come up to explain why there is no pictures of OP family.

    Paul Rabit
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Entertaining, but I'm glad I'm not related to either of these people.

    azubi
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did like that person, but after Trick-Ladders post and her response, I deeply congratulate the person she is marrying. May anyone be as lucky as you!

    Paul C
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It sounds to me that neither woman is mature enough to be married.

    Wild Cream
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don’t care lol OP sounds fun. I’d take her for a drink.

    Load More Replies...
    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In my family we're all split apart because the family if full of drunks and a holes. So 2 of us eloped instead of having to share the limelight with them.

    Dusty's mom
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it was just revenge for what she did to you the plan might be top heavy. But she ignored your whole family! Leave her out. It may save having her removed if she and bro divorce.

    Tabitha
    Community Member
    10 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not if, but when. Unless bro is brain dead or just as assholish as his wife, he will wake up one day.

    Load More Replies...
    Sandra Moon
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is genius level revenge. Maybe it is childish, as some people have said, but it's fun. SIL needs a taste of her own medicine

    Andrew Arons
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just hope that OP continues to use her revenge powers in the service of Good instead of E-vil.🤪

    Load More Replies...
    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While I like the pettiness, it feels weird to expend this much energy on someone else for your wedding. I'd just ask the photog to not focus on her and then just remove any pictures she was in rather than have them "pretend" she was getting a ton of attention. Like, I'd rather that effort go to my actual wedding. And is it really revenge if she caused OP to do all this on her special day?

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was there an update?

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where’s fluffy pink when u need here lol she’s ace with finding updates , cos I want one to

    Load More Replies...
    R Dennis
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would not want anything to do with either of these toddlers.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is op even asking her sil for pics? She should ask her own brother who presumably wanted pics of his family. No? Then that’s the problem, not the sil.

    Robin Roper
    Community Member
    10 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For my BIL's wedding, we, his family, were told to be at the church two hours early for family photos. Bride, sister the MoH, and their mother didn't show up until 15 minutes before the ceremony. While we waited, the photographer, who was a friend, said “Let’s take some family photos of you all.” So that’s what he did. SIL and her family were super pissed there were so many photos of us. None of us have seen any of the photos. Take a witch to know a witch.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oi do not insult us witches ! We are lovely people , not inhumans !like that kind are thank you very much !

    Load More Replies...
    Ellen Samberg
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Had it happen to me. Cousin's son's Bar Mitzvah. Came in from out of town. Was me, my brother, sister, and nephew. Had to arrive early for family photos at the temple, then again before the dinner party... outside, in the summer, in St. Louis (very hot and humid). Did it all graciously, and got him a great gift. Then, when the "album" was sent out, we only appeared in candid photos where we were in the background of shots of other people at the party. Really stung, but that's family for you.

    David Sallis
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Indifference is the cruelest cut of all

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Love it ! but op your wedding is YOUR WEDDING NOT THAT TRAMPS lovely , lovely idea but don’t let it play out have a fantastic day , ignore the s k a n k ,(she won’t be in your families life long once your brother realisies what a vile woman he’s married ) n just get her taken out ALL the pics after ! Until then no more thoughts of that thing , oh n update please , blessed be x.

    Sarah Belt
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm with Ilovecoffeeandpuns. I can sympathize with OP being upset, but I don't think turning OP's own wedding into a revenge will result in the emotional satisfaction OP deserves or really wants. 10 years down the line, I'd want to just have great photos & videos instead of paying a professional to focus on someone else. OP is literally paying someone to do a bad job.

    Iseley
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At my wedding there were TONS of pictures taken. However I wasn't in any by myself only a few with my husband and a total of 3 of the rest of my family. The rest? My husband his friends and his parents friends. Should've paid attention when we had to shrink the guest list and in lieu of my MIL random friends whom I had never heard of she said that we should cut my guest list. 4 were bridesmaids. The other one? My dad. PS We are now divorced ( happily on my end)

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is gonna get REAL interesting when kids appear on the scene.

    Brian Droste
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know if this would make SIL feel guilty or not but OP should take a as many pictures of SIL and post them all over social media. Maybe make SIL look like a fool for not taking any pictures of OP and sharing them. That is the best revenge I could think of. Maybe other family members might start questioning why are there no pictures of OP family. See what excuses SIL come up to explain why there is no pictures of OP family.

    Paul Rabit
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Entertaining, but I'm glad I'm not related to either of these people.

    azubi
    Community Member
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did like that person, but after Trick-Ladders post and her response, I deeply congratulate the person she is marrying. May anyone be as lucky as you!

    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Popular on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda
    ADVERTISEMENT