Woman Expects Friends To Cancel Their Party They Planned Months Ahead For Her 2YO’s Birthday

One minute you’re partying together, having fun and stumbling through the door just before dawn. The next, you’re in your mom era and the only time you see each other is at the kids’ parties, or over a chaotic lunch somewhere that has a play area. Having children can change the dynamics of a friendship. Some besties even drift apart as mom-life gets in the way.

In an amazing twist of fate, three close-knit girlfriends all had their kids on the same date, but in different years. It seemed perfect. Until it wasn’t… One of them has shared how the friendship is falling apart after the kids’ parties clashed. It’s a tale of entitlement, pettiness and grown-ups acting like children… And once you’ve read it, don’t miss the chat Bored Panda had with etiquette expert Rosalinda Randall about how best to navigate situations like this.

Planning a kid’s birthday can be a super stressful and time-consuming affair

Kids wearing party hats sitting around a table with pizza and juice at a birthday party, capturing a kid’s party scene.

Image credits: zinkevych / freepik (not the actual photo)

Now imagine being told to cancel everything at the last minute so your child can attend someone else’s!

Friend wanted me to cancel my kid’s party to attend her kid’s party causing a parenting and friendship dilemma.

Text describing planning a kid’s party and a friend expecting to cancel it to attend her own kid’s party.

Toddler girl in pink dress celebrating birthday with a red velvet cake and number two candle at a kid’s party.

Image credits: kshlimovich / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text describing a friend wanting me to cancel my kid’s party to attend her kid’s party invitation conflict.

Text about friend asking to cancel kid’s party to attend her kid’s party causing a scheduling clash and conflict.

Text excerpt about discussing a friend's kid’s party after attending, highlighting friend wanting to cancel child's party.

Woman shocked and frustrated while looking at her phone, reacting to friend wanting her to cancel kid’s party.

Image credits: EmilyStock / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text excerpt showing a friend upset for not attending her kid’s party, highlighting the friend wanted me to cancel my kid’s party.

Friend wanted me to cancel my kid’s party, insisting her daughter’s birthday party was more important to attend.

Friend wanted me to cancel my kid’s party to attend hers, causing a fallout and ending their communication abruptly.

Image credits: UnitedUnicorns007

“No one likes a bossy friend”: an etiquette expert weighs in

Two women outdoors, one looking frustrated and rubbing her forehead while the other gestures with concern, reflecting a kid’s party conflict.

Image credits: eugeneshemyakin9 / freepik (not the actual photo)

“Lauren was wrong.” Etiquette expert and author Rosalinda Randall didn’t skip a beat when we relayed the story to her. She said there’s no doubt that the mom of the 2-year-old didn’t go about things properly.

“What made her think or assume that her friends would attend when they clearly told her they wouldn’t and why they couldn’t?” Randall pondered.

She added it was unreasonable for Lauren to expect the other two moms to cancel only a few days prior to the party. “It would have put her friends in a bad spot,” Randall told Bored Panda. “That’s because the party was being held at a venue, and they would have no doubt forfeited their deposit. They would have to contact every partygoer to inform them of the cancellation.”

Of course, the two birthday boys would likely be devastated after being super excited about their combined party. “They’d not only be disappointed and probably embarrassed, but then they’d have to endure a two-year-old girl party,” added Randall. “On the other hand, the little girl would not have known the difference if the date was switched.”

The etiquette expert said that it’s inevitable that the three would plan their kids’ birthday parties on the same day at some point. “In this case, if Lauren placed so much importance on her daughter turning two, you’d think invitations would have gone out sooner than a few days prior,” she told us.

“No one likes a bossy friend,” says Randall, adding that you can be reasonable even when you’re disappointed. “Lauren could have accepted the glitch and wished her friends a good time. Or, she could have switched her 2-year-old’s party to a later time or the next day.” It’s not like they share a guest list, she told us.

The expert says Lauren’s reaction was unnecessary. “Instead of cutting off the two friends when they called the next day, she could have expressed her disappointment,” explained Randall. “They would have probably generously apologized, everyone would have shared photos and moved on.”

We asked Randall how the friends should handle their kids’ birthday parties going forward. “If celebrating each other’s children’s birthday is a priority, you all need to communicate two months in advance,” she replied. “Discuss dates, pick one and stick to it.”

And to Lauren, Randall had this to say: “Lauren, it’s time to get it together, grow up, humble up, and make the call. You were the one to cut them off, you are the one who needs to open the door to a conversation and apologize.”

However, Randall told Bored Panda that if this is typical behavior for Lauren, the two other women should “do what you’ve probably always done; give her a little time, call her and schedule a regular get together.”

“Main character syndrome”: netizens didn’t mince their words

User comment expressing frustration over friend wanting to cancel kid’s party to attend another child's party.

Comment discussing views on the importance of a 2nd birthday party vs older children's parties and related parental concerns.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment about a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her kid’s party.

Screenshot of an online comment about a friend wanting me to cancel my kid’s party to attend her kid’s party.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a situation where a friend wanted to cancel a kid’s party to attend another.

Comment on a forum discussing conflicts over canceling a kid’s party to attend a friend’s kid’s party.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing whether to cancel a kid’s party to attend a friend’s kid’s party.

Comment discussing a friend wanting a kid’s party canceled to attend her kid’s party and related social dynamics.

Comment advising not to cancel own kid’s party despite friend wanting attendance at her kid’s party.

Comment discussing conflict when a friend wanted to cancel child's party to attend her kid’s party instead.

Comment about a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her kid’s party, stressing planning and priorities.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment emphasizing the importance of speaking up about canceling a kid’s party for a friend’s event.

Text excerpt explaining a friend’s unreasonable demand to cancel a kid’s party to attend her kid’s party, showing entitlement.

Comment discussing concerns about payment issues and unhinged behavior related to canceling a kid’s party for a friend’s party.

Comment about a friend causing conflict by wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her own child’s party.

Reddit comment advising to avoid conflict when friend wants kid’s party canceled to attend her kid’s party.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment about canceling a kid’s party to attend a friend’s kid’s party request.

Comment discussing attending both kids' parties without canceling, focusing on friend wanting to cancel kid’s party.

Comment post about a kid’s party, sharing a nephew’s lack of interest in presents and playing with toys instead.

Comment criticizing entitled friend wanting to cancel kid’s party to attend her kid’s party in an online discussion.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend another kid’s party.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her kid’s party conflict.

Comment discussing a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her own kid’s party and streaming service password issues.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing a friend wanting to cancel a kid’s party to attend her kid’s party.

Comment discussing dilemmas about canceling a kid’s party to attend a friend’s child’s party.

Comment about a two-year-old’s birthday party being only important to parents, unlike older kids’ parties.

Some felt that none of the moms were jerks in this situation

Parent struggles with friend wanting to cancel kid’s party to attend her child’s party, causing tension and mixed feelings.

Reddit advice on handling friendship conflict when asked to cancel kid’s party for friend’s event.

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