Man Upset As Dad Didn’t Pass On His Craft Skills To Him, While Half-Bros Start A Business With It
For centuries, the entire industrial development of humanity has proceeded this way: parents have passed on their craft and skills to their children, who, when their turn came, have shared the secrets of their craft with their own offspring. And woe to those who, for one reason or another, found themselves excluded from this line!
In today’s world, things work a little differently, but when a father passes on some of his unique work skills to his sons, it, you must admit, creates a certain vibe between them. A strong, special bond. Similar to the one that developed between the user u/brochib, the narrator of today’s story, and his two younger sons.
More info: Reddit
Passing on the special crafting skills from father to son seemss like a great way to create a special bond between them – and that is what the author of the post did too
Image credits: Malachi Cowie / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
In fact, the man has 3 sons, and he actually only taught his special craft skills to his youngest twin sons
Image credits: brochib
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The man divorced the mom of his eldest son literally at the same time he was born – and the woman later took the baby to another state
Image credits: brochib
Image credits: Artur Rekstad / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The man visited the son regularly and paid child support – but he preferred to have memories together rather than teach the kid his craft
Image credits: brochib
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
So now, the two youngest sons have started a family business together, based on the dad’s skills – and they make good money
Image credits: brochib
The eldest one, however, works the job he hates, but he was rejected by his half-siblings after asking to join the family business
So, the Original poster (OP) says he has three sons – the eldest (24 years old) from his first marriage, and two younger ones – the twins, aged 21. Our hero divorced his first wife just after their son was born, and the mom almost immediately took the baby to another state. Therefore, according to the custody arrangements, the dad saw his son quite rarely.
The author strove to be a decent father, and whenever he visited his son, he always tried to have some great father-son time together. He also really wanted to pass on his craft skills to all his children. The man has very specific niche skills in working with stone, wood, and metal, and all three sons expressed a keen desire to learn these skills too.
However, due to the peculiarities of the custody agreement, our hero was only able to fully teach his skills to his younger kids. He and his eldest son later agreed to spend some time together learning, but the author’s second wife then started her battle with cancer, and he simply couldn’t keep his promise to the eldest son.
As a result, the twins have now opened their own business using the skills they learned from their father (the original poster also helped them financially). The eldest brother, although he graduated from college, now works at a job he actually hates. He also earns far less than his half-siblings. So, the guy asked to become their partner – but got rejected.
He offered to help with the company’s finances in exchange for the stake, but the twins vehemently opposed it. Simply because their half-brother hadn’t invested the same time and effort into building the company, they said. Now, the whole family seems completely divided, and the OP is in despair about what to do. So the man decided to seek netizens’ advice.
Image credits: wavebreak media / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Well, the family craft business really does seem like a great idea in today’s world, full of cookie-cutter, impersonal things. So, any beautiful items literally created by human hands, bearing the imprint of the creator’s personality, are incredibly popular. For example, Digital Journal notes that last year, crafters in the US generated over $35B in sales across various channels.
This dedicated article on the Amra and Elma blog also cites statistics that the U.S. handmade goods market is currently valued at $268 billion with a ~9.8% growth rate. So it’s not at all surprising that two young men, who received not only truly great skills but also start-up capital from their dad, can make good money here.
Some commenters on the original post noted that the eldest son’s mother was likely to blame for the situation, having taken him away from training, but the prevailing view among responders is that the author is truly at fault here. According to many netizens, the OP preferred having great memories with his son over teaching him his craft, and subsequently avoided it under various pretexts.
In an update on the post, the man admitted that he’s indeed currently tormented by remorse and will try to rectify the situation. He says he’ll either transfer his stake in the company to his eldest son or offer for him to become an apprentice to another master craftsman living in Alaska. Either way, the author is determined to somehow right his long-standing wrong. So what do you, our dear readers, think about this whole story?
Most commenters claimed that the author is actually the one to blame here, so the dad decided to do his best to rectify the situation somehow
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Apparently I am in the minority according to the comments, but I do not think this guy is an ahole. Would it have been good to have had the time to teach the older son as well, of course, but the reality is he only had visitations on holidays etc, and the son was living in another state. To learn a professional skill you need to be learning on a daily basis, and have access to tools, resources etc, and that just wasn't possible. And how miserable would it have been if every time he visited his father, all they did was working on this skill. Again, when he finished high school it would have been good for him to learn, but the wife having cancer is something outside of his control. If the son did want to do this, he could have gone on to do an apprenticeship or taken classes, but he didn't. Offering him the chance to do learn from his brother's now is a good option, but he absolutely should not get a share in their business until he has earned it.
Children of divorce always suffer. This dad was only ever a part time/vacation dad to his oldest son, who clearly made little effort to be part of his life on a regular basis outside of their visits, nor to integrate his older son into his new family. But it's not like there's anything that can change that now. Older son would probably benefit from some therapy to let go all the disappointments and any future expectations and just accept that he will never have the place in his father's life his brothers do. Might be best to just go low contact and keep his distance from dad and new family. I'm afraid seeing them only pours salt into the wound.
Load More Replies...I ɢᴇᴛ ᴘᴀɪᴅ ᴏᴠᴇʀ $120 ᴘᴇʀ ʜᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴏʀᴋɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ɪ'ᴅ ʙᴇ ᴀʙʟᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ᴍʏ ʙᴜᴅᴅʏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴏᴠᴇʀ $13,453 ᴀ ᴍᴏɴᴛʜ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪs ᴀɴᴅ sʜᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʀʏ. sᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴇᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴄᴀsʜ ɪɴ ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ. ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇᴅ ᴍʏ ʟɪғᴇ.....➤➤ 𝗟𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗝𝗼𝗯𝟭.𝗰𝗼𝗺
Load More Replies...Children of divorce always get the short end of the stick. The older son just needs to let go of his disappointment at his parents failure and quit wasting time with expectations that will always end in disappointment. His father, to him, has only ever been a part time parent with more pressing priorities than his oldest son. There's no point in beating your head against that brick wall. You can't change it. Perhaps it would be best for him to go low contact with dad and his new family, and focus on his current situation and how to escape being in a job he hates. Maybe if he just quit seeing his dad, it would lessen the pain of his dad's half assed parenting. Maybe better to limit the relationship to brief texts on birthdays and holidays.
Apparently I am in the minority according to the comments, but I do not think this guy is an ahole. Would it have been good to have had the time to teach the older son as well, of course, but the reality is he only had visitations on holidays etc, and the son was living in another state. To learn a professional skill you need to be learning on a daily basis, and have access to tools, resources etc, and that just wasn't possible. And how miserable would it have been if every time he visited his father, all they did was working on this skill. Again, when he finished high school it would have been good for him to learn, but the wife having cancer is something outside of his control. If the son did want to do this, he could have gone on to do an apprenticeship or taken classes, but he didn't. Offering him the chance to do learn from his brother's now is a good option, but he absolutely should not get a share in their business until he has earned it.
Children of divorce always suffer. This dad was only ever a part time/vacation dad to his oldest son, who clearly made little effort to be part of his life on a regular basis outside of their visits, nor to integrate his older son into his new family. But it's not like there's anything that can change that now. Older son would probably benefit from some therapy to let go all the disappointments and any future expectations and just accept that he will never have the place in his father's life his brothers do. Might be best to just go low contact and keep his distance from dad and new family. I'm afraid seeing them only pours salt into the wound.
Load More Replies...I ɢᴇᴛ ᴘᴀɪᴅ ᴏᴠᴇʀ $120 ᴘᴇʀ ʜᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴏʀᴋɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ɪ'ᴅ ʙᴇ ᴀʙʟᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ᴍʏ ʙᴜᴅᴅʏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴏᴠᴇʀ $13,453 ᴀ ᴍᴏɴᴛʜ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪs ᴀɴᴅ sʜᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʀʏ. sᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴇᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴄᴀsʜ ɪɴ ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ. ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇᴅ ᴍʏ ʟɪғᴇ.....➤➤ 𝗟𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗝𝗼𝗯𝟭.𝗰𝗼𝗺
Load More Replies...Children of divorce always get the short end of the stick. The older son just needs to let go of his disappointment at his parents failure and quit wasting time with expectations that will always end in disappointment. His father, to him, has only ever been a part time parent with more pressing priorities than his oldest son. There's no point in beating your head against that brick wall. You can't change it. Perhaps it would be best for him to go low contact with dad and his new family, and focus on his current situation and how to escape being in a job he hates. Maybe if he just quit seeing his dad, it would lessen the pain of his dad's half assed parenting. Maybe better to limit the relationship to brief texts on birthdays and holidays.




















































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