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“Just Don’t Do Their Job Quite Right”: 40 Useless Robots
Interview
Nowadays, robots are everywhere around us. Okay, maybe not robots per se, but wonders of advanced technology, which have become such a regular part of our daily routine we don't even notice them. That is, until they no longer do what they were designed to do.
Let's take a coffee machine, for instance. When every morning you press the button that provides the oh-so-needed caffeinated goodness, you likely don't even pay attention to the machine until the coffee is ready. But perish the thought, one morning it ceases working. You would definitely notice that, now, wouldn't you?
Well, people in charge of or hanging around the robots you’re about to see sure did notice when they weren't working as they were supposed to. From malfunctioning bomb-defusing robots to overly dramatic roombas, and everything in between—this list, compiled from examples shared by the ‘Shitty Robots’ community, features them all. Scroll down to find some close-to-useless machinery and make sure you treat your coffee machine right, so it doesn't fall into the same category anytime soon.
In order to familiarize ourselves better with the field of robotics, Bored Panda got in touch with a national policy leader for the field of robotics, director of the Contextual Robotics Institute, and Distinguished Professor of Computer Science at University of California San Diego, Henrik Christensen, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions. His thoughts are in the text below where you will also find our conversation with the founder of the ‘Shitty Robots’ subreddit, ‘mr_bag’.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
A Building Security Robot
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#2
Boss Baby, Alexa’s Chosen
#3
Leave Her Alone
#4
2020 Take The Wheel!
Mario Strada 3 years ago
I remember a friend proudly showing me his talking Audi in the late 80s. After a week of driving it, listening to "Your door is ajar", "please fasten your seat belt" he took it in and had the thing removed.
#5
I Made A Lipstick Robot
#6
I Built Myself A Proud Parent. It Charges Me 25¢ For A Pat On The Shoulder
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 3 years ago
Another Simone Giertz device. She's really wonderful. Check out her YouTube.
#7
"Go Get 'Em, Tiger"
#8
When People Complain That I Spend Time On Building Useless Things
The Original Bruno 3 years ago
After the lipstick fiasco, I'm surprised she'd let it that near her eyes. (Same woman, right?)
#9
Sun Tracking Hat
#11
Craptimus Prime
David A Paterson 3 years ago (edited)
That's really good. Overcoming that one ton weight must have been a challenge.
#12
Frozen Yogurt Robot At Nasa Made The Cup To Her Exact Specifications, Showed It To Her, And Then Took It Back. Basically A Terminator
#13
I Thought I’d Leave It On While I Went Out For A Couple Of Hours And Return To A Spotless Flat. I Was Wrong
#15
I Made A Robot To Help Me Argue On The Internet
#16
Nice Try
#18
Roomba Suicide By Toilet Paper
#19
A Salad-Mixer
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 3 years ago
Honestly. How the hell do you get a salad to catch fire? Just HOW?!?
#20
Cutting Hair Using A Drone
Geoffrey Scott 3 years ago
I have no fear of this device. It would need to detect hair first. Shampoo, conditioner, robot, I'm saving SO much money!
#21
Bread Slicer
#22
I Made A Butt Wiping Machine
#23
My Friend And I Made A Pumpkin Robot
#24
Can't Handle Banana Peels
#25
Hands Free Pringles Dispenser Invention
#26
"I Made An Emergency Escape Machine From Online Drinking Events" | Marina Fujiwara
#27
Drones Are Here To Steal Your Jobs Parents
Ronstantin 3 years ago
Took me a second to realize that it's a doll. (It is a doll, right? RIGHT?!)
#28
I See Your Knife Welding Roomba, But My Chainsaw And Hedge Trimmer Roomba's Are An Ankles Worst Nightmare
#29
The Automatic "Bob Ross Cat"
#30
How To Decorate Xmas Tree In 10 Seconds
#31
Eating While You Work
#32
Job? Spook The Dog
#33
The Future Of Pancakes
#34
I Have A Bedmaker Robot
#36
Cctv Camera Stripper
TotallyNOTaFox 3 years ago (edited)
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed that I saw wierder things than that
#38
A Robot That Does Your Nails
#39
New Home Defense System
#40
I Invented One Handed Scissors
#41
Zero Dentists Recommend This Toothbrush
#42
Shower Bot
#43
First Prototype Of My Newest Robot. The Cable It Is Trying To Cut Is The Cable Providing The System's Power
#44
Does This Count?
#45
Korean Traffic Robot
#46
Oh Simone!
#47
Advanced Robotic Turtle
#48
It's...... Writing It's Own Code! Is It....is It Self Aware?!? It's Self Aware!!!!! Run!!!!!!
#49
I Have Combined Technology With My Limited Physical Form So I Always Have A Spoon At Hand
#50
I Never Knew How To Eat Popcorn, Finally Something That Will Help Me !
#51
Anti-Dog Robot
#53
The Correct Way To Spend Your Birthday
#56
The Turkey Stuffer (Joseph's Machines)
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What do you think ?
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 3 years ago (edited)
Simone Giertz, The Queen of S****y Robots appears on this list 12 times total. EDIT make that 13 and for some reason someone is downvoting me. Her thing is making useless robots. She made it to the Last Show with Stephen Colbert because of her robots. It's her thing. And someone is downvoting me for pointing out the numerous appearances on a list about "useless robots". WTF?
arthbach 3 years ago (edited)
It *WAS* her thing. She made so many useless devices she realised she'd learned some awesome skills, and she is now making non-carp. :o)
Load More Replies...
Gavin Johnson 3 years ago
Go to You Tube, search Simone Giertz. She is so much better than these still photos. Her approach to useful / useless robots is awesome. Her Tesla Truck, Truckla, that she built is proper.
Arthur Waite 3 years ago
While you're at YouTube, you can experience real robots - the narration of many joke-and-display videos is by AI voice, a body-less robot. The older examples are really irritating, but more recent ones are coming closer to human-like speaking. I generally complain when I spot these, as they obviously put human narrators out of work.
Load More Replies...
Mark Reaves 3 years ago
I want to build robots but too poor. I've already did rough plans for about a dozen home automation robots such as, automatic pet feeder, pet feeder maintainer (refills and cleans pet feeder), dish washing robot (that also integrates into pet feeder maintainer to help it clean itself and the pet feeder), a chef bot, a butler bot, a maid bot, and a central brain for the home as well as a brain for vehicles so you can come home and your home will automatically prepare for your arrival and verify security and let you in.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 3 years ago (edited)
Simone Giertz, The Queen of S****y Robots appears on this list 12 times total. EDIT make that 13 and for some reason someone is downvoting me. Her thing is making useless robots. She made it to the Last Show with Stephen Colbert because of her robots. It's her thing. And someone is downvoting me for pointing out the numerous appearances on a list about "useless robots". WTF?
arthbach 3 years ago (edited)
It *WAS* her thing. She made so many useless devices she realised she'd learned some awesome skills, and she is now making non-carp. :o)
Load More Replies... Gavin Johnson 3 years ago
Go to You Tube, search Simone Giertz. She is so much better than these still photos. Her approach to useful / useless robots is awesome. Her Tesla Truck, Truckla, that she built is proper.
Arthur Waite 3 years ago
While you're at YouTube, you can experience real robots - the narration of many joke-and-display videos is by AI voice, a body-less robot. The older examples are really irritating, but more recent ones are coming closer to human-like speaking. I generally complain when I spot these, as they obviously put human narrators out of work.
Load More Replies... Mark Reaves 3 years ago
I want to build robots but too poor. I've already did rough plans for about a dozen home automation robots such as, automatic pet feeder, pet feeder maintainer (refills and cleans pet feeder), dish washing robot (that also integrates into pet feeder maintainer to help it clean itself and the pet feeder), a chef bot, a butler bot, a maid bot, and a central brain for the home as well as a brain for vehicles so you can come home and your home will automatically prepare for your arrival and verify security and let you in.
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