Husband Threatens With Divorce During Dinner At Wife’s Parents, Watches Their Marriage Fall Apart
Being able to finally own a home is a dream for many young people. But let’s be real, it’s a major challenge to find property that meets all of your criteria. Like fitting your budget, being in a good location, and matching your aesthetic expectations. At any rate, both you and your partner need to be on the same page when it comes to finances. When you have vastly different wants and needs, it can devastate your relationship.
One man took to Reddit to share how he and his wife started having major financial trouble after moving into their new home. Things got so bad that the man suggested that they either sell their home or increase their income. And though he found a new job, his wife was unwilling to do the same, making him consider divorce. Scroll down for the full story and the internet’s reactions.
Both partners need to brace themselves when navigating financial troubles
Image credits: jm_video / Envato (not the actual photo)
A man shared how he got a new job amid financial struggles, but his wife’s refusal to find work led him to consider divorce
Image credits: zamrznutitonovi / Envato (not the actual photo)
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Many people online pointed out that announcing the possibility of divorce in front of his wife’s parents was a poor decision
Every experience in life offers us valuable lessons
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Irrespective of whether we are suffering or celebrating, it is important that we learn something from every experience in life. For instance, when problems arise, one should think positively and seek solutions. Conversely, we should stay grounded and appreciate the good moments in our lives. When it comes to couples, partners need to work together as a team to navigate the twists and turns of life.
Though everyone has their own way of facing problems, there are a few things you can do to overcome hardships. Building resilience helps one bounce back quickly after a fall, adapting even in situations of adversity. It is about having the mental strength to stay hopeful amidst the challenges faced.
To be a resilient person, you have to embrace change and learn from your past lessons. First, let’s recognize that we have a problem at hand. Upon self-realization of what has happened, you start discovering solutions and see it as an opportunity for growth. Furthermore, reflecting on how you dealt with bad situations in the past can help you understand what you did right and what you can do differently in the future.
Positive relationships can provide emotional support and practical help
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Developing problem-solving skills is essential to navigating obstacles with confidence and creativity. For instance, suppose you intended to surprise your friend with flowers on their birthday but couldn’t get them on time; instead of feeling defeated, you just donned your creative hat and made roses out of tissues.
Resilience may also be cultivated through developing a strong support system comprising of family members and close friends. The Harvard Business Review emphasizes, “Resilience is not something we need to find deep down inside ourselves; we can actually become more resilient in the process of connecting with others in our most challenging times.”
Sharing your struggles with loved ones takes a burden off your shoulders. You can discuss your issues and potential solutions with them. It may even be other people’s opinions that give you a fresh perspective on your situation. Apart from building resilience, you can also practice mindfulness and relaxation.
Partners should stand by each other in tough times
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Going to a meditation class and doing yoga can help you manage stress and improve mental clarity. Moreover, we should understand our limits and set achievable goals. During bad times, we should try to focus on what we can control.
How we react, the choices we make, and our attitudes during challenging times reveal our true character. If your partner doesn’t stand by you when you need them the most, then maybe you should reevaluate your relationship.
In this particular situation, the husband and wife needed to work together to improve their circumstances. However, the wife’s refusal to cooperate pushed the husband to his limits. When it comes to finances, couples should discuss their goals, strategies, and challenges honestly to ensure they are on the same page and working towards a common objective.
Do you think the husband did the right thing here? Or do you believe the wife’s actions were justified? Let us know what you think in the comments below.
Many people felt the author made the right choice in considering divorce
A few people also felt that both the author and his wife were equally responsible for the situation
Some people felt the author shouldn’t have hinted at divorce if he didn’t truly want it
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I feel there's been a lot of repeated stories here in the past week
Load More Replies...Wife should've got another job after that humiliating conversation with her boss.
I feel him tbh. Buying the house was stupid on their c**p salaries but she absolutely needs a better paying job
The idea of leaving her was probably ticking over in his subconscious and being called out like that in front of her parents brought it to the front. Yes, the marriage is over. But, from the sounds of things, it was heading that way anyway. As for her precious job, well, unless the bank of mom and pop reopens for her, she's going to have to look for something that pays better (and values her as a person) and, well, maybe think about had she done that in the first place...... 🤦
Even though this one is an old one, she's still at fault. She apparently wants to dump everything on hubby.
Immature European father here... i don't get it where folks in the US has 2-3 jobs... I have 1 job. When i was married, for 5 yrs she was looking for a job, we decided to have a kid, baught a flat on a loan... all worked out... Besides her cheating but i digress... For Ref, i make about 36K/yr
It's almost like it's a totally different place!
Load More Replies...When we were house hunting - we made every effort to get something lower than our budget. Assuming some day there might be only one of us with an income. COVID, medical issues, furloughs, layoffs, wow was that a smart move! Our house might not be impressive or in a great area, but we have never been afraid of how we’re going to make it work.
Sounds like a couple that's really not compatible. Their relationship simply wasn't strong enough to survive the stuff life throws at you, united as a team. I have no doubt they are divorced now, as this is a very old story.
She asked for it. How on earth can you stay at a job your boss tells you that you can leave if you're not happy with your salary, even saying you aint worth that????!!!! Honestly, if that didn't wake her up nothing will. It's on her to make the marriage last and suggest counseling if she wants to stay with that man.
One of the biggest reasons for marriage is that you make a pact to stay together in good and in bad times. And in life there will be bad times. OP is a bad husband to leave his wife because of this. I was shocked when I read he contacted divorce attorneys and not counseling. Sure, if there is a***e or the love has been gone for years, even though both tried to get it back, I'd get it. But these two had a few bad years and already want to call it quits before even trying counseling? OP, set your wife free and never marry again until you grow up.
FFS, EVERY marriage hits rough spots. You have to get through them TOGETHER to keep your marriage intact—-and when you do, the marriage gets stronger. There is fault on BOTH sides here, and taking the nuclear option of announcing that you want a divorce in front of your spouse’s family is a sign of immaturity on OP’s part. Now, his wife was also immature in not looking for a better-paying job to contribute to the household finances. Money problems can put a huge strain on a marriage, but you don’t just chuck the whole d****d thing for it. At worst, they should’ve sought marriage, and financial, counseling first. So YTA for both of them—-however, the wife is the lesser a*****e for not seeking better employment BUT OP is the big a*****e here for going nuclear at a family dinner, and for not even trying counseling first.
how about the opposite? she is an a*****e with a capital A, and sooner or later they would have gotten divorced for other reasons. Don't you dare only blame a man for the marriage falling apart!
Load More Replies...She doesn’t deserve it. He tried everything he could to explain why it was necessary to move or get better jobs. First she pouts about loving the house and her job, so she does jackshıt for months to hold up *her* side of the partnership. Finally, her supreme effort is, “boss, can I get a raise?”; gets shot down as not worth it, dusts off her hands having ‘tried’… end of effort. Then, when *his* efforts finally pay off with a raise that will only allow them to make ends meet, her action is to take a swipe at him in front of her parents that she hopes he will stop complaining now. That’s not a supportive partner, it’s a selfish person who expects her spouse to make up the entire deficit of their mutual situation. His response was heat of the moment, that happens. And it was over the top but he has used it to realize that he doesn’t have a partner. He has someone who refuses to work with him, share responsibility, actively help to improve their situation. Maybe the divorce will give her the attitude adjustment she needs.
Load More Replies...I feel there's been a lot of repeated stories here in the past week
Load More Replies...Wife should've got another job after that humiliating conversation with her boss.
I feel him tbh. Buying the house was stupid on their c**p salaries but she absolutely needs a better paying job
The idea of leaving her was probably ticking over in his subconscious and being called out like that in front of her parents brought it to the front. Yes, the marriage is over. But, from the sounds of things, it was heading that way anyway. As for her precious job, well, unless the bank of mom and pop reopens for her, she's going to have to look for something that pays better (and values her as a person) and, well, maybe think about had she done that in the first place...... 🤦
Even though this one is an old one, she's still at fault. She apparently wants to dump everything on hubby.
Immature European father here... i don't get it where folks in the US has 2-3 jobs... I have 1 job. When i was married, for 5 yrs she was looking for a job, we decided to have a kid, baught a flat on a loan... all worked out... Besides her cheating but i digress... For Ref, i make about 36K/yr
It's almost like it's a totally different place!
Load More Replies...When we were house hunting - we made every effort to get something lower than our budget. Assuming some day there might be only one of us with an income. COVID, medical issues, furloughs, layoffs, wow was that a smart move! Our house might not be impressive or in a great area, but we have never been afraid of how we’re going to make it work.
Sounds like a couple that's really not compatible. Their relationship simply wasn't strong enough to survive the stuff life throws at you, united as a team. I have no doubt they are divorced now, as this is a very old story.
She asked for it. How on earth can you stay at a job your boss tells you that you can leave if you're not happy with your salary, even saying you aint worth that????!!!! Honestly, if that didn't wake her up nothing will. It's on her to make the marriage last and suggest counseling if she wants to stay with that man.
One of the biggest reasons for marriage is that you make a pact to stay together in good and in bad times. And in life there will be bad times. OP is a bad husband to leave his wife because of this. I was shocked when I read he contacted divorce attorneys and not counseling. Sure, if there is a***e or the love has been gone for years, even though both tried to get it back, I'd get it. But these two had a few bad years and already want to call it quits before even trying counseling? OP, set your wife free and never marry again until you grow up.
FFS, EVERY marriage hits rough spots. You have to get through them TOGETHER to keep your marriage intact—-and when you do, the marriage gets stronger. There is fault on BOTH sides here, and taking the nuclear option of announcing that you want a divorce in front of your spouse’s family is a sign of immaturity on OP’s part. Now, his wife was also immature in not looking for a better-paying job to contribute to the household finances. Money problems can put a huge strain on a marriage, but you don’t just chuck the whole d****d thing for it. At worst, they should’ve sought marriage, and financial, counseling first. So YTA for both of them—-however, the wife is the lesser a*****e for not seeking better employment BUT OP is the big a*****e here for going nuclear at a family dinner, and for not even trying counseling first.
how about the opposite? she is an a*****e with a capital A, and sooner or later they would have gotten divorced for other reasons. Don't you dare only blame a man for the marriage falling apart!
Load More Replies...She doesn’t deserve it. He tried everything he could to explain why it was necessary to move or get better jobs. First she pouts about loving the house and her job, so she does jackshıt for months to hold up *her* side of the partnership. Finally, her supreme effort is, “boss, can I get a raise?”; gets shot down as not worth it, dusts off her hands having ‘tried’… end of effort. Then, when *his* efforts finally pay off with a raise that will only allow them to make ends meet, her action is to take a swipe at him in front of her parents that she hopes he will stop complaining now. That’s not a supportive partner, it’s a selfish person who expects her spouse to make up the entire deficit of their mutual situation. His response was heat of the moment, that happens. And it was over the top but he has used it to realize that he doesn’t have a partner. He has someone who refuses to work with him, share responsibility, actively help to improve their situation. Maybe the divorce will give her the attitude adjustment she needs.
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