Man Wonders If He’s A Jerk For Offering Roommate And His GF Home-Cooked Food

They say the way to a person’s heart is through their stomach, but giving someone a delicious, home-cooked meal or some fresh cheesecake can simply be a nice thing to do! There doesn’t have to be an agenda behind it.

One culinary student, whose roommate doesn’t seem to understand this, recently found himself in a bit of a pickle after his roommate’s girlfriend raved about the fabulous food in their house. Now, he’s wondering if he should have held back on the Southern hospitality, so below, you’ll find the full story of his furious roommate that was shared on the “Am I the [Jerk]?” subreddit.

This culinary student is passionate about preparing delicious meals and sharing them with others

Image credits: voronaman111 ( not the actual photo)

But ever since his roommate’s girlfriend began raving about his food, the roommate has decided they have beef

Image credits: cottonbro studio ( not the actual photo)

Image credits: Sonya Pix ( not the actual photo)

Image credits: darlingdearr

Sharing food with friends and loved ones is a great way to strengthen relationships

Image credits: Mikhail Nilov (not the actual photo)

Most people would be thrilled to have a roommate who shares delicious meals with them, especially in their early twenties. But somehow, this culinary student’s delicious food has come between him and his housemate. Perhaps this roommate needs a reminder that food can, and should, be used to bring people together, rather than drive them apart. In fact, sharing food with a friend or partner can actually strengthen our relationships. Studies on chimpanzees have suggested that sharing food releases oxytocin in both parties, amplifying our positive emotions and encouraging us to make this bond with a person again and again. 

However, sharing food can only build stronger relationships if both parties are on board with the sharing. Dr. Jennifer Verdolin, an animal behavior researcher specializing in social and mating behavior, told Refinery 29 that if two friends agree to share meals, it’s important that both foods are actually desirable to both parties. If you’re offered something you’re not interested in, there’s no point in sharing, and you might even become annoyed if someone tries to take some of your own food. Perhaps the roommate in this story wasn’t interested in having any of his culinary student roommate’s cheesecake, and that’s why it led to resentment?

Merging socialization with eating might even make us happier and more trusting people

Image credits: Dan DeAlmeida (not the actual photo)

It’s possible that the roommates could have been brought closer together if both understood the value of sharing a delicious meal, and that there were no ulterior motives at hand. In fact, shared meals could have benefits for both parties’ well being. “There is some evolutionary evidence that eating with others provides social and individual benefits: those who eat together with others more often tend to feel happier, be more satisfied with life and are more trusting of others,” Dr Rachel A. Ankeny, Professor in the School of Humanities at the University of Adelaide, told SBS, pointing to research such as Professor Robin Dunbar’s paper Breaking Bread: The Functions of Social Eating.

If the reason this roommate had a problem with his girlfriend raving about the food was because he was jealous, there’s a simple solution to his problem: start cooking more for his girlfriend. It’s likely that she was simply complimenting the chef, but it’s also possible that she was hinting to her partner that she would appreciate it if he made more of an effort when it comes to preparing meals. Culinary skills are actually a very valuable component of many relationships, as a study of 2,000 Americans found that 43% admitted they’ve ended relationships in the past due to their partner being a poor cook. Three quarters also said they’re more likely to go on a date with someone they know can cook, and 65% said they believe a bad meal can turn the entire date sour. 

And cooking together could be a great way for this roommate and his girlfriend to bond

Image credits: Vlada Karpovich (not the actual photo)

So for anyone looking to impress their partner, don’t be afraid to start building up your culinary skills. You might even want to get your significant other involved, so the two of you can learn together. “Cooking can be an intimate activity that creates bonds and brings people together, so we encourage couples to get in the kitchen to spend some quality time together preparing a meal,” Kristin Bryan, Director of Culinary Innovation at HelloFresh, says. “Cooking should be fun and easy, no matter your culinary experience.” And, of course, you just might find that the way to your partner’s heart was through their stomach after all.

If this roommate is actually interested in strengthening his relationship with his girlfriend, I’m sure his budding chef roommate would be happy to provide him with some useful tips. Perhaps the culinary student can even teach his roommate a delicious, date night meal to make for his girlfriend. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this up and coming chef did anything wrong, or do you agree with the commenters that his roommate was likely just jealous? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article discussing roommate drama surrounding food, we recommend checking out this one next!

Readers assured the culinary student that he had done nothing wrong, noting that his roommate is likely just jealous

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