“AITA For Telling My Brother’s Fiancée She Can’t Wear A Dress That Looks Just Like Mine?”

Finding the perfect wedding dress can be hard. According to Jana Ann Couture, brides try on an average of five to seven dresses before they find ‘the one.’ The A and B Bridal Shop claims that most brides need to try on fewer than 10.

But what if you already know what kind of dress you’re going to wear because you saw your sister-in-law wearing it? That’s what this bride decided, angering her SIL and her side of the family. This story sparked a discussion online: would this be considered stealing or are these women making the wedding dress conundrum way too deep than it needs to be?

A woman chose a copy of her SIL’s wedding dress for her own nuptials

Image credits: Mint_Images/Envato (not the actual photo)

When she found out, the SIL was furious, accusing the bride of disrespect

Image credits:  LightFieldStudios/Envato (not the actual photo)

Image credits: DebtPutrid7448

The woman had no choice but to invite the copycat SIL to her bridal fitting

Brides and couples shouldn’t lose sight of what is most important about the wedding

Finding out that someone close to you is copying your wedding dress is hardly exciting. Perhaps that’s why more and more brides nowadays choose custom designs, just so they can be sure no one else will get a dress like them.

In fact, according to Zipdo, 48% of American brides choose custom dress designs. 40% of couples also choose customized wedding favors, pointing to the fact that newlyweds often want their wedding to be as personal and one-of-a-kind as possible.

It sucks when someone steals any kind of idea from your wedding, bet it the dress, the first dance, the cake, or the DJ. Yet most wedding experts advise not to lose sight of what is most important about the occasion: celebrating love.

Wedding planner Maureen Cotton of The Soulful Wedding told So This Is Love that some brides or couples might misunderstand what weddings are all about. “It’s not the palette, venue, or food, but rather how the love and connection between two people and their community can be experienced and celebrated.”

Millions of people look for wedding inspiration online, and ideas are bound to overlap

Image credits: Sandy Millar/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The sister-in-law in this story blatantly ripped off the author’s dress idea. However, nowadays, wedding ideas might overlap and repeat themselves in friends’ circles, and that might happen accidentally, with no one meaning any harm.

According to a recent survey by Zola, 91% of couples look for inspiration on social media. Pinterest is the Holy Grail of inspo for brides and wedding planners, but people often find that translating their picture-perfect ideals into real-life plans often is too difficult or costs too much.

Still, in 2024, there were more than two billion wedding ideas saved on Pinterest, and around 400 million wedding-related searches. Odds are, some bride might steal your dress, ring, or even honeymoon ideas totally inadvertently. And while that doesn’t excuse the SIL’s entitled behavior, it can give one a little bit of perspective on this whole situation.

It’s okay to be upset about stolen ideas, but it shouldn’t overshadow your own big day

Image credits: Photos by Lanty/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

The bride in this story wasn’t sold on the idea that imitation is the highest form of flattery. But some wedding experts recommend looking at situations like these through exactly this lens: think of yourself as a trend-setter!

Planner Amber Anderson at Refine for Wedding Planners also told So This Is Love that “it’s hard to say who saw something first and adapted for their style and personal touch. The world of weddings is all about inspiration and expanding on ideas, so imitation is considered flattery.”

Wedding experts also have some more tips for brides whose friends decided to copy elements of their weddings:

• Acknowledge your feelings but don’t dwell on them. “It’s okay to be upset,” Anderson said. “Give yourself a time limit and choose to be upset for a moment, vent with your partner, then let it go.”
• Don’t let it ruin your big day. Taking the h**h road is hard, but sulking on your wedding because someone else might be copying your dress at theirs might simply not be worth it. “Instead, choose joy, take a spin around the dance floor and have fun!” Anderson says. “Because remember, marriage and friendship are more important than any detail at any wedding!”
• Take solace in the fact that it won’t be identical. It’s almost impossible to recreate wedding details from one wedding at another wedding. And even if they somehow magically are, the people, the vibe, and the atmosphere probably won’t be the same.

Think of it this way: are there really any original ideas in the age of Pinterest and Etsy?

“You are not the only one who noticed. Everyone at the table noticed,” commenters sided with the original dress owner

People also recommended she distance herself from her SIL in the future

However, others saw no problem with identical dresses: “Nobody cares about your dress except you”

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