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Helicopter parents are those who constantly monitor their children’s lives. Tiger parents are known for their strict expectations and a strong focus on achievement. Free-range parents, on the other hand, are relaxed and encourage independence.
The internet loves assigning labels and putting people into boxes. But sometimes its descriptions stick precisely because they capture real-life patterns.
So when a curious Reddit user asked women to share their most memorable encounters with “boy moms,” hundreds came forward with cringey experiences that went beyond your average pride. Some also added unusual interactions they’ve had with the sons themselves.
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#1
My favorite “boy mom” was my MIL. She raised my husband and his brother with boundaries, they know how to sew, cook and all about the menstrual cycle. She knew they might have women in their lives one day and needed to be prepared to support. They’re sensitive and not afraid to show emotion. She only let them sit to pee in her house so no cleaning up dribbles or falling in the toliet.
After I had my first child she pulled me aside and made sure he was doing his part. Told me to let her know if he wasn’t and she’d talk to him. I miss that wonderful woman so much.
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#2
One of my coworkers is a “boy mom” she has one son and 2 daughters and the only time she talks about her daughters is when she’s insulting them and calling them lazy. Her son is the center of her and and husband’s world. He is a junior, named after her husband and she openly talks about how he is her husband’s favorite and how spoiled he is. She will talk about buying her son a couple hundred dollar pair of shoes and stuff for school shopping and making her daughters buy their own.
She talks about how “high maintenance” girls are and how her son is so easy.
She makes her daughters do chores and not her son because he “doesn’t do it right”.
I could go on and on.
She is literally the worst!
#3
My MIL is textbook "boy mom". I got permission to shut that down real quick when we met because even he thinks it's weird.
What makes it worse is he's the ONLY CHILD. Took a couple of years, but through r/JNMIL, I'd found words to put her in her place.
Went along the lines of, "if you want to marry your son, just say that."
And "he's your son, not your boyfriend."
"Nobody can love him like I do!" She says in a drunken state one time while she was in town.
I replied, "clearly you haven't loved him enough, because I'm still raising him."
I wouldn't doubt if she was the catalyst behind several relationships ending with how she behaves. She's backed off a bit, but I know that lunatic resents me just for being his wife, or in her eyes, "the other woman".
Upstaged75 1 hour ago
I will never understand the incestuous vibes these moms give off. Do they not see how creepy it is? Thankfully my mom never acted like that with my brother. She's thrilled he found such a wonderful wife. Personally I think my SIL is a saint - he can be a lot to deal with. 😂
#4
Terrible. I dated one of the boys of a “boy mom.” Basically her 2 sons could do no wrong. For example, my ex would constantly borrow money. Conservatively $5k in the 2 years we dated. Which was a lot for me at the time. When we ended things, I asked for him to pay me back. He didn’t so I took him to small claims court. He brought his mom to yell at me. She said her precious baby would never borrow from me… I had everything recorded on Venmo LOL. She was legit speechless for a few minutes until she said why was paying for dates a big deal? I said not only did I pay for our outings, he borrowed money from me outside of that. His brother too. Anyway she said I shouldn’t be doing this. It’s not womanly.. whatever that means 🙄.
#5
My mum was one, had 5 boys before me. She worshipped them but saw me as competition, she'd deliberately cause arguments to get them to defend her and go after me.
#6
My experance with boy mums is they don't teach their sons to adult.
My ex at 26!!! Was woken up by mum, had his bed changed by mum, was cooked and served for by ..... can you guess......yep mum!!
She created a man child. She was pleasant to my face but I strongly suspected she didn't like me at first. I think I grew on her as I encouraged him to do more for himself. He moved out. She had a melt down.
I kicked him out a year later and she had another melt down. I think she had gotten used to the idea that her son had grown up and then I dumped him back on her.
My now husbands mother is amazing!
#7
I have a cousin who's a "boy Mom" and I'm a mom to a boy and girl. She has said some things that are a little messed up about little girls. She has also said she would never want to be a mom to a girl.
Uh, sorry, but you have no Idea what you are missing. My girl is the most loving, warm and wonderful little creature and it's so weird that people hate her because of her gender.
Girls are just as awesome as boys and I do not understand the girl hate from these moms.
Also, I am told that "boys are just different, I wouldn't understand." I have a boy too! And gender is a weird thing to get hung up on. My boy loves playing with an Elsa Barbie doll and lightsabers. My girl loves her baby dolls and roaring at everything like a dinosaur. So I find the gender flex to be very strange since it feels like a societal attribute as opposed to a biological divide.
#8
I’m convinced I was dating the son of the queen of boy moms. He was her step-son but that whole relationship in hindsight raised some red flags.
She had 3 kids of her own, 2 boys and 1 girl who was the oldest. She treated her daughter like dirt and was always picking fights with her. The boys could do no wrong, they had no curfews or anything.
Her relationship with my ex was INSANE. Like, I found out later they slept in the same bed and everything. When she found out he was mistreating me, she ranted about how “lucky” I was that he never put hands on me. She also slapped me when I had enough and screamed back at him in front of her. That woman was insane.
#9
So bad. my first boyfriend was the oldest of three boys. his mom did not like me. she gave him a photobook for his high school graduation with photos of him growing up and on the last page there was a picture of him and me at prom and underneath it read "Remember we loved you first" which was just weird. little stuff like that and then never asking me any questions about myself or anything. she also was such pick me vibes. luckily his dad was much much better.
#10
Oh man. I dated the son of one of those boy moms. He was her precious baby boy even after giving me a black eye. "You must have done something horrible for him to do that to you." Yeah, you can have him back.
#11
My sister is the worst kind. My nephew is not even 2 and she’s already talking about all the girls that are going to try to trap him with a pregnancy? Projection is not just a therapy buzz word….
She’s also OBSESSED with the fact that he is biracial (we are white, his father is Dominican and Cape Verdean). I do think his cultural identity is super important, but it feels like tokenism to me. Literally someone commenting on his curly hair and she’s like “well he is ****BIRACIAL****!” So cringey. But I’m white, so what do I know?
Laserleader 15 minutes ago
My god... you have just described my sister and her daughter. Before her daughter was age of 3 she was talking about how evil men are and already saying her daughter is "stealing" men from her, and as her daughter is biracial and has dark skin and curly hair while my sister is white with blond hair, and she wont do anything cute with her daughter's hair like pigtail or braids because "it is so ghetto".
#12
My mil has only boys. Shortly after we got married she posted an article from a mom blogger about how having boys can be hard because "you'll never get to be the one to choose the wedding venue" (and other language about how evil daughters in law steal their sons from them) but that there's nothing like the bond between a mom and her son 🙄
She's also made comments to me that she's glad my BILs wife is Jewish because it means she gets BIL for the holidays, and at my BILs wedding (her second son to get married) she made a comment about how it's hard to not be "queen" any more.
I remember when I was pregnant she asked how I was feeling and I told her how sick I've been and she said "I wish I could say I'm sorry to hear that but I'm not," referring to the belief that means baby is growing healthily.
Our relationship spans over a decade and while she's generally been nice to me, these moments do stand out and I've never been super comfortable with her nor do I personally like her. I don't get in the way of my kids or husband having a relationship with her but I don't text her, connect with her on socials, hug her hello/goodbye, etc.
#13
This is a similar conversation that’s going on in a parenting subreddit right now, so I’ll share my same comment here.
I am a mom of three girls and at a friends baby shower about 4 years ago (right before the world shut down) this conversation was happening, as the mom to be was keeping it a surprise at birth. When I shared that my own experience with girls wasn’t much different than those shared by boy parents (my girls love sports, video games, rough housing, legos, super hero’s, speed demons; rocks in pockets and book bags, the outdoors, etc) , there were 2 boy moms who I swear you’d think I had called their mother a hamster. They went OFF. How dare I compare such different and unique experiences? Apparently I said my experiences from a place of superiority? Oh.. and when my girls became teens and were “cackling harpies” I’d see how wrong I was and “good luck” to me then, because “everyone knows teenager girls are terrible and end up hating their moms”.
Sooo ya? Idk… my kids are 10, 14 and 16 and there’s been no switch flipped where they suddenly hate me. Rocks are still very much a thing though, but it’s my own fault now that the eldest has her own rock tumblers, she will borrow other family members pockets to bring them home when hers exceeds capacity.
#14
I dated the son of a “boy mom”. It was wild. There were 2 sons, 1 daughter. Tbh both sons were bums. No drive, virtually no ambition, and both completely living off of their parents. The sister worked hard playing soccer in college and became a veterinarian. When I was dating the youngest son, he was 25/26, the oldest brother was 30. They lived in a disgusting house their parents bought for them. They had basically no expenses. They could do no wrong. They had money and resources thrown at them and their terrible behavior was always enabled by her.
When my ex cheated on me with his intern, his mom was all for it. He “deserved to be taken care of”. He, and his mother, both expected that he be in a relationship where he was waited on hand and foot. The new girl was ready to be barefoot in the kitchen. I was tired of buying him groceries that he would let rot. I was out, she was in. Thank god.
#15
Dated several guys from boy mom families - I was never good enough for their babies….
I was modeling professionally, working full time paying my own bills and I owned my own home, and I was earning two degrees with a triple major and headed to law school.
But I wasn’t good enough for their boy. 🤦🏼♀️🤯.
#16
My ex’s mom had his back even after he would violently beat me. I told his dad what was going on and got that lady in trouble.
#17
I married a boy whose mom idolized him and shoved his sister to the side.
Throughout our marriage she chipped away at me, made him choose sides, even told some nice lies about me. All in the interest of pushing me out.
Well, she won.
#18
I used to work in childcare and education, and my experience has been there are Moms and then there are the Crazy Moms, regardless of their "brand" (tiger/boy/almond/free range/etc).
I worked for a woman who was the mother of 3 boys, 2 were twins, and the eldest was only 18 mos older than the twins. She was normal and chill. She did lots of "boy stuff" so was fine with the title "boy mom".
Before that I worked for a lady who was just absolutely bananas. Her sons opening line was, "this might be weird, but I was breastfed until I was six. I just like to let people know." That poor kid. Like, he knew there was something off, but didn't have enough experience outside of his home to fully understand the levels of crazy he was subjected to on a daily basis. The woman also had a daughter, so she wasn't just a "boy mom" but dear God do I feel for her son's future partners.
#19
Overly protective, jealous, and blind to any of their son’s wrongdoings. My grandma on my father’s side would be fake nice to me while my father was around, as soon as he was gone, she would insult me and try to belittle me. One of my aunts of two boys would always get between any of their romantic relationships or girls they had over. If either one got themselves into a bad situation, my aunt would gaslight their friends into them believing it was their fault and that her sons had no part of it. My ex’s mother who I had actually become pretty close with at the time– her son had cheated on me, she tried to gaslight me into saying that it wasn’t cheating and that I should stay.
#20
My only experience is that some of them were really nasty about my daughter, mostly in the infant stage. "Good luck with having a nasty teenager." Sneers and "SO glad I don't have deal with periods." I think it was less misogyny, although obviously that plays a factor, but more jealously. Every one of these women kept trying to have a girl and it didn't work out and so they were bitter about it and this was their way of coping. Still not convinced if they actually wanted a daughter or a doll to dress up and call their mini me.
#21
My ex was his mums only son (3 daughters, 1 son), he could do NO wrong. She was never my biggest fan.. but when he cheated on me and I called off our engagement, she told ME off for calling off the engagement saying that everyone has hiccups when they get engaged and it should be excused and the engagement continue (it did not).
Then when he cheated AGAIN several more times over the space of a year, I did finally break up with him… she asked me what I did wrong to make him cheat.
#22
My ex’s mom ruined our relationship. She was in the middle of our argument before we broke up and forced us to take a break. After a few days of thinking, I thought it best to cut things off and really give it time for us to be apart, so I went to break up with him. She opened the door, told me no, and slammed the door in my face.
#23
Terrible. I come from a family of four sisters and one brother, we always got treated the same – mayyybe a little favourable toward my brother, but he was also the youngest so it was kind of expected. When I started dating my now husband – WHOA. I had never experienced a mum looking at me as a villain for "taking her baby boy away."
I suffered years of insults, personal attacks and snide remarks before she (AND THE REST OF THE WOMEN IN THE FAMILY, especially his nana) realised they were simply driving their "baby boy" further away. Thanks to them I have significant anxiety surrounding family events, as well as a complex about the way I look, how much money I make, my mental health... the list goes on.
Currently in therapy trying to untangle the mess they made of my self worth. On a positive – I've been with my husband for ten years, married for two. Suck it, boy mum and co.
Upstaged75 1 hour ago
Sounds like these women would still be breastfeeding their adult sons if they could.
#24
I think my mom resonates with being a boy mom more than anything else, even though she has one of each of us. 🤣 In her eyes, I’m always lazy, no matter what, apparently!! Even though I worked my way through my college education and am going back in my thirties for an advanced degree. Meanwhile, my brother had his finances and loans managed by mommy. 🙄 I wouldn’t be eye-rolling if the differences weren’t so blatant, lol. I could’ve certainly used help as I had no idea what I was doing and am the older sibling!!
#25
My friend is not a self proclaimed “boy mom” but she most certainly falls into this category.
Her son is 4 and has a history of biting, both adults and other kids. She always explains it that he has too many emotions and *because he is a boy* he doesn’t know how to express them without biting. Any time he would rough play with other kids and he got out of hand, she would explain that “boys will be boys”. No teaching or scolding or apologising to other parents. Honestly, I feel so sorry for her son’s future partner!
She also has a younger daughter who behaves similarly. But she will talk to her daughter about her behaviour and tries to teach her not to bite or hit or fight. She can parent! But because her eldest is a boy, she excuses his behaviour completely and doesn’t parent him at all.
Of course, when my daughters (similar age) act out, she is the first one to ask me “what is wrong with your kids!” 🤣.
#26
Technically not my experience, but years ago one of my classmates said she was irritated because she had a little boy playing at her house with her child , & when it was time to clean up the toys he said “my mommy says cleaning up isn’t for little boys.” & when she laughingly told his mom what he had said , the mother was adamant about how her precious son was not going to be cleaning up.
#27
My experience is that they think it's something that makes them quirky & unique, and are all 'I just wouldn't know how to raise a girl!!!'. I legitimately had that conversation with someone, and I felt like saying 'well, did you know how to raise boys? Or did you just work it out? No boy is the same after all'. I wonder if the whole 'making boymom my personality' enthusiasm is a bit of overcompensation because they'd also like a daughter.
#28
I only know one ‘boy mum’ whose emotional incest is repugnant. He is essentially her teenage husband; they have date nights and she loathes his girlfriends.
#29
My own mother. She kept going until she had a son (little does she know I identify as a man) she had 4 girls until she had a son. My dad didn’t care that he had all girls.
My mum treats my brother like a king. He can do no wrong. While the rest of us had to work hardboth in the house and at work to support the family, he was sitting there playing games, sleeping in, he wasn’t allowed to have a job until 22 years old. Now he struggles to even find a job. I low key just think he doesn’t apply for anything. He’s now 26 and games all day and night while my mum and dad are exhausting themselves to fund him. He slept in their bed until he was 13 years old. My dad tried everything he could to make him into a man. Mum stopped him because it meant that my brother would have to do things. I would often find my mum cuddling my brother in bed.
I moved the hell out and saved myself. Every time my sisters or I bring up the subject of my failed brother to my mum, she yells at us saying he’s trying for a job and that we aren’t to ‘break his head’ (a saying in Arabic) so that he won’t turn out to be a broken loser.
Anyway. It’s been a weird life in that aspect. But yes, boy mum for sure.
#30
My husband's aunt has 3 boys and 1 girl. The girl is the youngest. She still calls herself a boy mom. She also posts family pics from when she just had the boys and calls it "my most precious season".
#31
I have a student named "King". His mom freely admits that she named him that because "after 3 girls, I finally had my king".
It's extremely difficult to stay on her good side because the least bit of criticism or expectations (yes, it's an expectation your kid be awake during school and do his work) puts her on the defensive.
"I'm not going to make him do anything he doesnt want to" is something she has said to me more than once.
Good news for her, she's gonna have her "king" live when her his entire life.
#32
Mine couldn’t do any wrong in the marriage, his mom both believed, and spread around any lies he told her. The only time she wouldn’t take his side was when it was in direct conflict with her, and would look bad on her.
They had a really dysfunctional relationship, so much toxic femininity seeped into the marriage, and I could do nothing to prevent it. I’m out of it now and haven’t spoken to either of them for a long time, life’s very peaceful now.
#33
I’m struggling with this right now. Husband is the oldest son & a junior so the sun literally rose and fell on his shoulders. They never made him do anything around the house and said that as long as he was working (he only paid his car insurance) then he could stay there as long as he wanted. His sisters on the other hand were treated like trash and all of them ended up moving out way before 18. We’ve been together 4 years and have the same fight over and over about him helping around the house or even just simply listening when I talk. I’ve tried speaking with his parents about it but they just brush it off as funny or cute and make excuses for him. I’m done with my masters in 1.5 years so if things don’t change by then I’m divorcing him and moving out of state with my dog/cat.
#34
I used too work with a lady who had all Boys. She babied them and disliked me so much. She was 40 and I'm in my 20s?
She was horrible , a lot of workers didn't like her. She would always throw tantrums when things didn't go her way.
#35
I am married to a boy mom who is super harsh on her daughter. I have to mediate otherwise they’d tear each other apart. Her sons though? Sweet talkings to and always trying to keep them from fighting. We’ve had talks about it, with therapists, but she can’t stop. At this point our daughter, who will be 16 in two months, will bounce once she’s 18, and my wife has already said maybe it’s best for her.
My wife has some serious anger towards her mother, but refuses to acknowledge it’s affecting her relationship with her daughter. She’s also incredibly headstrong and has issues acknowledging when she’s wrong. At this point I’ve just accepted it, and I make sure to be calm and rational with her and our daughter, and I try to provide as much positive love to her as I can. It’s super frustrating though.
#36
My husband is the oldest of 4 boys.
His mom literally did not give me anything I asked… like a towel after swimming or showering or like water or a spoon or whatever until he asked her. If I asked her, she didn’t know or understand (Spanish is first language but know English VERY well) but when he asked, he got it right away. My husband is a regular dude, smart, tall handsome…. Her other sons are slums.
#37
The one I knew would in the same breath talk about how feminist she was but also that she was glad she was a boy mum because boys were so much less complicated.
#38
When we talked about the move in things (in Covid, I only found work in their area) she said to me (after she said okay to this) “I think you two are too young and you should try out other people.” I was frozen. She just said yes, so I can move to them for a couple of months, and said THIS? A few days after that ofc we broke up bc of his idiot mom.. (we were together for 2 years and basically I spent the most of the time in their house, but always wanted buying myself groceries etc… but most of the time they won’t let me, they wanted to pay it for me.. idk what was going on behind my back..).
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