Hey Pandas, AITA For Kicking My Family Out Over “A Few Silly Remarks” On Christmas?
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A little background: I live with my boyfriend (Q) and his little sister (B) who is under our care. Their mom (O) is a narcissistic, homophobic a**hole who dumped B to travel the world. The rest of the family (flying monkeys) still considers her a good person. My cousin (H) is a few years younger than me and still in college. H is dating his boyfriend (K) who goes to the same college. My sister (D) is one of those stereotypical perfect moms. She and her husband (R) are some weird branch of Christianity that believes dinos and humans existed at the same time. Yeah, I’m not kidding. Q and I are hosting Christmas at our house this year because we live in the middle of everyone. Q and I have been dating since high school (this is important) but aren’t married due to the fact he has a ton of medical debt (long story).
Alright, now for the story. It’s Christmas Eve, and Q, B, and I are finally done with all the baking and cooking for the next day. We are just cleaning up and Q and I are trying to coax B to go to bed. I end up hearing a long string of text notifications from my phone so I look at it.
D has been texting me with last-minute demands for what her kids want to eat and that no alcohol is in the house when they are there
Image credits: Kelli McClintock (not an actual photo)
You heard that right, IN THE HOUSE. Neither Q nor I are heavy drinkers, but we keep some wine around for special occasions like Christmas dinner. I ended up just ignoring her. (I did look at her demands for what her kids wanted and it was this really weird stuff so I ignored it, except for the. very reasonable request of crackers. I’ll give kids crackers.)
The next morning everyone starts showing up. H and K get there first and go down to the basement to see some Civil War relics Q and I have. (K is a medical major and wanted to see the arm bones we found down there. Yes, arm bones. A fully constructed human arm.) Q goes down with them. B and I stay upstairs and she starts a puzzle. The flying monkeys show up and turn on the TV to watch football. Soon O comes in. She heads straight to the kitchen and starts fiddling with all kinds of random stuff. Like changing the fridge’s temperature. Why? I don’t know. I had to try and stop her. This took like 25 minutes and she talked the entire time!
After everyone sat down O raised her glass for a toast to and I quote “The sacred institute of holy god-given marriage and all those who participate in it”
Image credits: Al Elmes (not an actual photo)
This is a very passive-aggressive swipe at me, Q, H, and K. She doesn’t like Q and I living together since we aren’t married. I try my best to let it go but she and D have a very loud conversation about how “homosexuality and modern customs are corrupting our youth”.
Then D says to me “Poor Avenging Knight, I hope you find a good partner one day.” (Q was literally upstairs) This was the final straw. D and O have been making these remarks for the last 5 years and everyone else (except H and K) has been letting it slide. I told her and O that they needed to apologize to H, K, and me for saying what they did, and stop making those sorts of comments. Both D and O refused to so I kicked them and the flying monkeys out. H, K, B, Q, and I were the only people there for Christmas dinner.
We ended up splitting the gifts we bought for everyone else among the 5 of us
Image credits: Kira auf der Heide (not an actual photo)
The next day I sent out a text to D, O, R, and the flying monkeys letting them know that we would be going no contact with D and O and low contact with everyone else. I got numerous replies and voice mails of them loudly protesting.
So pandas, AITA for kicking my family out over in their words “a few silly remarks”?
Moderator’s note:
Please note that the images included in this article are for illustrative purposes only and do not represent the actual individuals or items discussed in the story.
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I got lost in the alphabet soup and the question why ON EARTH you would want to invite any of those toxic people around for Christmas.
Yes, too many characters all at once. It's a common mistake.
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On the assumption this is not the first time you have asked them to moderate their behaviour, you are NTA. Demanding specific food is only acceptable if there are dietary or medical needs. Changing settings and zero alcohol in someone else's house is not reasonable.
And doing it the night before christmas is really stupid, you know you're too late with your silly list by then.
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I got lost in the alphabet soup and the question why ON EARTH you would want to invite any of those toxic people around for Christmas.
Yes, too many characters all at once. It's a common mistake.
Load More Replies... On the assumption this is not the first time you have asked them to moderate their behaviour, you are NTA. Demanding specific food is only acceptable if there are dietary or medical needs. Changing settings and zero alcohol in someone else's house is not reasonable.
And doing it the night before christmas is really stupid, you know you're too late with your silly list by then.
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