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87 Exact Moments When People Saw Just How Dumb The Person They’re Dating Was
When you start dating someone new, it’s all butterflies and optimism. You notice the green flags first; good manners, decent style, or maybe they smell amazing and say all the right things. You start thinking, okay…this could be something. And sure, sometimes a few red flags sneak in too; maybe they’re a little dramatic or slightly questionable.
But then there’s a whole different category. The kind where it’s not toxic…just deeply, painfully, undeniably idiotic. Today, we stumbled upon a corner of the internet where people are sharing the exact moment it hit them. The question was simple: when did you realize you were dating an idiot? And let’s just say, the answers did not disappoint. From falling for the most obvious scams to making decisions that defy all logic, these stories are as baffling as they are entertaining. Keep scrolling… it only gets worse from here.
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#1
He got a random phone call & the caller told him he won a free vacation. He completely believed them & ended up giving out all his banking information to them.
RELATED:
#2
Boyfriend at the time told me he had $13500 in his account. We were broke college kids so I asked how he got this money. Turns out he was approved for a credit card in this amount and had no idea how credit cards worked. He thought that was his money.
15 years later, he still lives at home with his parents. Not saying financial literacy is the reason why….
#3
Not me, but I was talking to a friend’s girlfriend when the subject of using a compass for navigation came up. She said “OK, so you always know which way north is, but how do you know which way is east, west, or south?”
I was speechless.
Often, in relationships, red flags tend to show up early, making them easier to spot. Maybe they’re rude to servers, dismissive in conversations, or constantly talking over you. Those signs tend to show up quickly and clearly. But figuring out whether someone is…let’s say, not the brightest? That’s a slower reveal. It doesn’t hit you all at once. Instead, it shows up in small, confusing moments: odd conclusions, questionable decisions, or things they say with full confidence that make you pause and think, wait…what? And before you know it, those little moments start adding up to a much bigger realization.
#4
My ex got his first apartment that came with a reserved parking space. One day, someone parked in his spot and refused to move it, so he called the towing company. The guy ended up leaving and my ex parked in the spot again before the towing company came. I don’t know what exactly happened afterwards but my ex called me and told me they towed his car because it actually wasn’t his spot, he just wanted to park there since its closer to his apartment. Idiot literally called the towing company on himself and I had to drive 40 minutes to get his car back.
#5
Back when we were freshman in college (now-ex). I was in second sequence calc and he was in like pre-college algebra.
I did one of his take home tests, I wrote everything out step by step on a separate sheet of paper for him to look over. It was factoring equations.
Gets a zero because he copied them ALL wrong because he didn’t realize that the parenthesis mattered.
#6
When I told her (butch lesbian) that toenail polish stays on longer than fingernail polish and she asked me why I don’t just use toenail polish on my fingers.
Now, technically speaking, one way to measure intelligence is through IQ (Intelligence Quotient). But let’s be real; you can’t exactly pull out a clipboard mid-date and say, “Before we order dessert, quick IQ check?” That’s not how any of this works. In real life, you don’t get a neat score or a warning label. You figure things out gradually, through conversations, shared experiences, and sometimes…through situations that leave you staring into the distance, questioning your life choices.
#7
When she said the initials, FBI, were made up and they only use it in the movies. I laughed my but off. She gave me that 'look'. Then I asked her her, "how many states are in the U.S.A.?" She said, "52 or 53". And my last question was, "name the 53rd state". She said "Cuba". I told her I had to go to the restroom before we leave. And I left after that. She may still be sitting there wondering if I am coming back to pay the bill. And she had a Ph.D.
hannahbahngswife 19 minutes ago
I mean, The Orange is the PRESIDENT of the United States, but that doesn't mean he's smart...
#8
When she picked up a half empty bottle of soda and drank it. Someone's discarded trash ginger ale. I dumped her that day. Ain't no way I'm gonna catch Hepatitis because my partner is an idiot. She was flabbergasted of course and acted like it wasn't a big deal and that it wasn't disgusting at all.
#9
She didn’t believe that Thanksgiving was purposely on Thursday every year and thought it was just a coincidence.
For context, IQ is a standardized score derived from tests that measure cognitive abilities like reasoning, problem-solving, memory, and spatial awareness. It compares how someone performs relative to others in the same age group. A score of 100 is considered average, meaning most people fall somewhere around that range. Scores above that suggest stronger analytical or reasoning abilities, while lower scores may indicate difficulty in certain cognitive areas. But even then, it’s important to remember that this is just one way of measuring intelligence; not the whole picture.
#10
Had a twitter account with his full government name where he mainly harassed or flirted with women.
#11
Dropped his lighter in the toaster. Forgot about it. Blew up the toaster.
#12
Had to explain to my ex that just because tropical fruits grow where it's warm doesn't mean that you can leave them un-refrigerated for extended periods of time without them going bad...
Researchers have also tried to understand how IQ varies across different parts of the world. A 2019 study by Richard Lynn and David Becker at the Ulster Institute suggested that Japan ranks among the highest in average IQ, with Taiwan and Singapore close behind. These findings often spark debate, but they do highlight how intelligence trends can vary across populations based on a wide range of factors.
#13
We were at a pub quiz with his friends. I answered a lot of the questions as my brain retains random trivia. He got quieter and quieter. Afterwards he moaned that I made him look like the stupid one.
I am not going to rein in my intellect to protect your ego. Either pick up a book or shut up.
#14
When he was cheating and then told me it wasn’t a big deal because his dad would cheat on his mom all the time🥴
^(both of them were idiots).
#15
He didn’t think cows had to be pregnant or recently given birth to produce milk. So I asked if he thought I produced milk. He confidently said “no you get that in your 20s” (we were 18 at the time).
Other data sources, like World Population Review, echo similar patterns, pointing to regions such as Hong Kong, South Korea, Taiwan, and Japan as having a relatively higher average IQ scores. Countries like Australia, Russia, New Zealand, Singapore, Vietnam, Canada, and the UK also tend to rank among the higher averages. But again, these numbers don’t exist in a vacuum—they reflect broader social, educational, and economic contexts rather than defining individuals.
#16
When I was building a raised bed in the garden and he tried to tell me it was a retaining wall, it was going to fail and I didn't know what I was doing.
I'm an engineer, I design them for a living. This was a raised bed, no more than 0.3m high, on a foundation, holding back some soil. There was nothing to fail and shockingly, almost 5 years later, nothing has moved even 1mm.
When we split up and I bought his half of the house from him, when in an argument I was telling him what a piece of trash he was for making the whole process so protracted and difficult, he legitimately said to me 'you have no idea how stressful and expensive it is buying a house'. Matey, I've bought the same one twice, the first time you did nothing and the second time you've been too busy with your side piece to realise you'll be homeless in a week.
The most dangerous type of idiot is the one who has no idea just how stupid they are.
#17
When i would use big words in an argument and then 2 minutes later he would incorrectly use the same word out of context with zero clue what it actually meant.
Fungus John 12 minutes ago
I find thats a very common thing stupid people do. It's like they subconsciously know you are smarter than them, so if you said this big word that made them mad then they can say it and be smart like you.
#18
He said he “wasn’t good with the months of the year”.
When psychologists talk about intelligence, they don’t treat it as a single trait. Instead, they often divide it into two main types: crystallized and fluid intelligence. Crystallized intelligence is everything you’ve learned over time: your knowledge, vocabulary, and accumulated skills. It’s what helps you recall facts, understand language, and apply learned information. Fluid intelligence, on the other hand, is your ability to think logically in new situations, solve unfamiliar problems, and adapt on the spot without relying on prior knowledge.
#19
We were making instant pudding from the package and instructions said to mix it with 2 cups of milk.
Here is how our conversation went:
Him: 2 cups of what?
Me: 2 cups of milk?
Him: no like what cups?
Me: the 1 cups?
Him: but like which ones, you have so many
Me: the one that says 1 cup on it???
Him: none of them say that
Me: what do you mean? It literally says it on the handle
Him: what handle?
At this point I went to the drawer where I pulled out my ceramic strawberry measuring cups that I just got and had showed him a couple days earlier, and pointed at the 1 cup label and was like “what’s wrong with you” and he got upset that “I made him feel dumb for not being a chef”.
#20
He asked how it was possible to start a fire in the Arctic if it was so cold there. Which is kind of the point of starting a fire in the Arctic?
#21
Was dating an executive administrative assistant for a huge mortgage lender. She couldn’t get their/there/they’re your/you’re then/than or any of it correct. I told her she needed to polish up on her grammar and writing and she told me I needed to get “passed” it.
Here’s where it gets interesting. Fluid intelligence, which helps you navigate new or unexpected situations, tends to peak earlier in life and can gradually decline with age. Meanwhile, crystallized intelligence usually grows because you keep learning and gaining experience over time. So someone might have a wealth of knowledge but still struggle with basic reasoning in the moment. And that’s often where those “wait…why would you do that?” moments come from.
#22
When I freaked out thinking I had a detached retina. Asked him to drive and sit in on the consult. Afterward I asked him what he thought about the advice. He said if you wanted me to pay attention you should have told me. This was after I was with him every day and evening during heart surgery and recovery. Uncertain who was the biggest idiot, him or me.
#23
Not someone I dated but I had a friend who was excited to get married because she’d get a new name, a new social security number and her credit score would get reset. Bless her heart.
#24
Bi/m here, so you get two, even though it doesn't correlate to their gender, just stories.
* Woman - Simply could not understand that seasons are different in the southern hemisphere after I returned from Australia. I even made a makeshift diorama with the sun and the earth. I have an Astrophysics-related degree, so I didn't want to be condescending, but at some point I had to give up. Map-reading skills were abysmal as well.
* Man - Too many to list, but the most egregious was ink in pens was infinite: as in, by nature, the ink doesn't leave the pen. I just looked at the paper and the pen, back at the paper, and the pen. I could write a book about similar stories. "Huh, I wonder where it goes when you flush a toilet." We even had a new word of the day calendar I made for him.
On top of that, intelligence isn’t shaped by just one factor. While genetics do play a role, environmental influences are just as important. Access to quality education, overall health, proper nutrition, socioeconomic conditions, and even cultural or testing biases all contribute to how intelligence develops and is measured. That’s why comparing IQ across groups can be complicated—it’s never just about raw ability, but also about opportunity and context.
#25
I went to the Winnie the Pooh exhibit on date, he didn’t plan anything so we went to the art museum. Who at the time had a special art show that showcased the original drawings/sketches from the book and animated series. Otw out I was making Winnie the Pooh jokes with another girl (just from the animated series) the guy seemed bothered.. he said to me later via text that my banter with her made him feel like I was showing off my artist knowledge and he’s not creative so he wouldn’t get it and it was emasculating & belittling…
The interaction was short bt I made a joke about living bottomless and free & he didn’t laugh bt she did and then I was like ‘Ty Eeyore for representation’ all while walking out the gallery.. then he was sad at dinner and I tried to comfort him… when I got the text …I just wished him well.
#26
This dude once told me he knew I was into him because I moved my hair behind my ear.
Apparently this was some secret sign I wasn't hip to. 🙄
Out of curiosity, I asked what other signs there were like this, and he said if a woman who's smoking exhales in your direction.
#27
I was set up on a blind date once right after my first long time girlfriend and I split up. I was depressed, and some friends set me up with this really hot girl they knew. We met at Applebee's, first mistake. Second mistake was she didn't seem to understand that a date is a kind of back-and-forth of asking and answering questions. Mainly she just chewed on a plastic straw and stared off into nothing with a blank expression. Most of my questions answered with "I don't know," like specifically where she lived in our sprawling metro complex of the DC/VA/MD. When I asked her how she got home if she didn't know where she lived she shrugged and said, "I drive there?" She said she had no job (at age 22), and when I asked if she lived with her parents, she said she didn't. I asked what she did to pay for rent and food, and she said "credit cards?" No college, no surprise. High school graduate, though. I guessed that she was some daughter of a rich person who just paid for her stuff on autopilot. Most of her attitude and answers reminded me of a coworker's 8 year old who occasionally came to work. Like, uncomfortable with adults, an introvert, didn't say much, and just spun in her chair while chewing on a straw.
We did not have a second date.
So while an IQ score might offer a general sense of how someone processes information, it doesn’t fully capture how they behave in real life. You don’t really know how someone thinks, reacts, or makes decisions until you spend time with them, and sometimes, that’s when the real surprises show up. And as these stories prove, those surprises can range from mildly confusing to completely unbelievable. Have you ever met someone who made you stop mid-conversation and think, how does your brain even work? And more importantly…how did you deal with it?
#28
When I realised she couldn’t calculate 30% reduction on 100 - for real.
#29
Alright, this is going to make me look like a snob and/or a-hole, but anyway....
I went out to drinks with a woman. I ordered a coffee. She asked me something about the coffee, and I responded that I'm not really a coffee connoisseur, I just like to drink it. In response, she stared at me blankly. After a 3 second pause, she asked "what's that?"
She didn't know what "connoisseur" meant. I kind of chuckled awkwardly and then realized she was being serious. So, I explained what it meant. We didn't have a second date, which was probably best for both of us.
#30
He revealed he thought rice came from potatoes.
#31
He would frustrate the hell out of me by waking up and asking me as he stood in front of the closet, "What should I wear today?" I finally lost it on him when he had a pair of character socks with a different characters on each sock, and he asked me, "Which sock should I put on which foot?" I don't know what he did before we dated, since he couldn't get dressed without asking me these toddler-level questions.
#32
She called chess “chest.”.
#33
The chemical truck driving in front of us was carrying "pneumonia" according to her.
#34
When she said she purposely asks me loaded questions just to start a fight. Not even cause she’s mad or anything either, she said she just likes to fight sometimes.
#35
When he proposed. We’d been casually dating for a month.
#36
I'm an Asian American woman. He asked me the difference between being Chinese vs Asian.
He also tried to argue with me that Darth Vader and Anakin were two different characters lol.
#37
He saw a TikTok on Oppenheimer and said “DID YOU KNOW THEY DROPPED A REAL NUKE FOR THIS MOVIE?”
And I had to intentionally use easy words when we spoke otherwise he’d get confused.
#38
He explained to me his plan to buy a house.
He was going to take $15,000 and use that as a 10% downpayment to buy a $150,000 house that was in bad shape. He was then going to flip that house, doing all of the work himself, and sell it for $400,000. He estimated he could do this work for about $20,000, which he would take from the mortgage. He would then have $385,000 in his pocket because he had only spent $15,000.
He assumed his mother would be fine getting the mortgage with him because he was unemployed. He planned to get a loan to get that initial $15,000. He did not have any knowledge in building or renovating houses other than having taken woodshop in high school. He also believed that mortgages were attached to the property, not the person, so that if he sold the house, he would just get the full cash value of the sale and the mortgage would transfer to the new owners.
He refused to believe anyone who tried to tell him otherwise. There are certain things I can't fault him for, but his absolute refusal to be budged that this wasn't how things worked was what really solidified it for me.
#39
I bought him an ice cream cake for his birthday. he stored it in the fridge, and was subsequently surprised and confused that it melted.
#40
When we were having a quiet drink on the patio and he informed me that "no one can tell how old stars are, you can't count light" He insisted that all the data regarding the stars we see is just made up so people can sound smart.
Oh and he didn't think carbon dating was real or even possible as well.
#41
When he (24M) said to me (23F) and after we had been dating for over 6 months, “Why do you use big words alllll the tiiiiime? I can’t understand you! Can you stop using big words????” I wasn’t intentionally using particularly “big words.” I was a math nerd turned engineer who had barely read books at that point. I was dumbfounded. That was just the way I spoke.
#42
He thought that a walrus was a mythical creature.
#43
He thought the classification of animals was: mammals, birds, bugs, fish and creatures.
#44
When he referred to tectonic plates as Titanic plates and couldn’t understand why I thought it was hilarious.
#45
My SO was doing the laundry. He says “babe, we have too many darks. They won’t fit in the machine?!”
I gave him a long hard look “do two loads”
He also forgot how to make enchiladas the other night. *While* he was making enchiladas.
#46
In HS I dated a girl from New York. one day she was bragging about how smart she was. I figured I'd start with an easy question and asked her what the capital of NY was. Thinking that she'd goof and say New York City. I was stunned when she said New Jersey.
#47
When he asked me if women shook themselves off after they peed. I looked at him and said what are we supposed to be shaking off?
#49
When she got upset with me for using 'confusing' words that an average 6th grader could understand.
#50
When she made a post insinuating I was intellectually inferior, all the while couldn’t figure out how to change the toner in her printer. Intelligence isn’t one dimensional and we all have strengths and weaknesses. We’re all idiots to someone.
#55
It took me way too long to realise but…
I booked a surprise trip to Greece for his birthday. I took care of everything, including booking annual leave for him at work. He was absolutely staggered and had no idea at all that we were going, it was fabulous.
He tried to return the favour for me, but was such a fail that he booked flights and no accommodation, tried to get me to cancel the flights, then made me book the accommodation when he realised the flights were non refundable.
What a great surprise I had.
#56
He didn’t understand why I was upset that he never said “Thank you” when I would drive him to and from work and bring him lunch everyday.
#57
I had known she struggled with finances, but i did not realize just how bad it was until 3 years in. This conversation wasn't the reason we broke up, but it contributed!
See, she had a lot of debt. Credit card collectors were always hounding her, and she built a habit of answering any call from a number she didn't recognize with shouting "STOP CALLING ME!" and then hanging up. When her car broke down, she bought a new (used) one. At 24% APR. Despite always being short and late to pay me her half of rent, she habitually spent her money on 'little treats' and Magic: The Gathering stuff.
Somehow all of this was excusable to me, but then again, i also didn't have a spine at the time. No, the breaking point was during a conversation where we discussed budgeting. I explained to her my strategy for avoiding debt was to simply get a rough estimate for my bills in each month, and always keep that amount in the bank so i can pay the bill when it comes. Literally just don't spend money i functionally don't have.
Her response? "Wow, how did you come up with that idea? 🤯". It's the most basic way to budget. It should be very intuitive even for a child, i'm afraid. We broke up and suddenly i was running a massive positive balance because i wasn't paying rent for two! My first vacation is this summer! :D.
#58
When I went on a date with him and he said being gay is unnatural, then we were walking behind a man who appeared to have cerebral palsy or a similar disability. He started imitating the way the man walked as if it was funny. I was disgusted. We were 16 and he was definitely old enough to know better. I did not continue dating him.
#59
He had an interview at a prestigious museum and everything was going really well until the formal interview wrapped up and the hiring manager offered to give him a tour of the exhibits where they’d be working. He declined because his parking was about to expire. He did not get the job. .
#60
I had a Chase Freedom Unlimited card. The dude thought that just because it said "Unlimited" that it meant that I had all the spending power at my disposal. He also begged to carry it around. Hell nah dude.
#61
When he made me listen to Joe Rogan with him. I couldn't do it, it felt like my brain was melting, it was so stupid. And he just parroted whatever he heard from the podcast, no matter how dumb it was. I was like, oh.... you have no critical thinking skills, do you?
This was back in 2016 too, so I don't want anyone telling me Joe went off the deep end after covid or whatever.
#63
When he would drop derrogatory slurs and rude remarks on people who didn't look like him and thought everyone else would find it funny.
I did not find it funny.
#64
He told me that he didn’t believe white privilege or male privilege existed. (He was a white man, of course.).
#65
There were so many times that had me question his intelligence, but one vacation stays out the most.
We rented a car, he made reservations beforehand because it's cheaper with one and when we arrived we had to pay double because we didn't have a reservation. He reserved it for the wrong week, we had to pay the fee to cancel the reservation for the wrong date aswell.
At the end of our vacation, when we were driving back to the airport at like 4am, he randomly stopped at the gate, which was the car repeair shop of the car renting company, on some weird country road. He started crying because he didn't knew how we were supposed to give the car back because the gate is closed and our flight departed a few hours before they even opened.
He somehow didn't realize on his own that we have to give it back at the airport, where we actually rented it, which was still a 30 minute drive from there.
#66
A week after he moved in my place, I was chilling on the couch and he came in with his sneakers over the kitchen sink (kitchen and LR were together).
Was watching him because it was weird-ish…
He proceeded to take the sponge for the DISHES and started cleaned the SOLES OF HIS SNEAKERS OVER THE KITCHEN SINK.
I *jumped* off the couch hysterical and in disbelief.
He said “me and my flatmates did this all the time”. Women as well.
We dated a year before this and I often ate at their place.
I should’ve known then to kick him to the curb.
#68
Whenever we were watching a movie neither of us had seen before, he would constantly ask me “what just happened?”, “what is going on?”, and my favorite “who is that” to a completely new character on screen.
He also thought women should be flattered by getting catcalled and he expressed a few times how he wished men got that kind of attention.
#69
When I came to the US at first, I stayed with my uncle who lived in NYC, and my ex thought it meant that I came in through Ellis Island. I assume he thought I came on a steamliner with a scarf around my head to escape the Potato Famine.
#70
When we were sitting on his porch, looking up at the stars, I said "Isn't it crazy that there are stars bigger than our sun? It makes me feel small."
Then he laughed at me and said "No there's not. Our sun is the biggest thing in the universe." Then he went on to argue with me and put me down to make himself feel smarter. I wonder if he ever researched it.
#71
When I told him about a really traumatic experience for the first time and he said, “I’ve heard worse” thinking it would comfort me.
#72
I went on a tinder date with a guy. The first thing he asked was “What’s your major?” After telling him what non-STEM major I was studying, “Oh, you must be the only Asian not trying to take over the world in math!”
Other Gems:
“I don’t know anything about political parties. I just know I’m a republican because my family is all Republicans.”
“I’m thinking of moving to Portland. Why? I wanted a change and I heard it’s all republicans out there.”
“Look at that one at the bar hitting on that chick. Lesbians trying to take our women. :)”.
#74
When he lived with his parents at 29 and they told him they were selling the house and moving into a 1 bedroom apartment and he said "well, what about me??!" He was so hurt by it and thought his life was falling apart. I shook my head so hard. If that isn't a wake up call, I don't know what is.
#75
He didn't think there could be clouds at nighttime. I asked him "So how do you think it rains at night?"
His mind was blown.
#77
My ex told me I needed an oil change. I told him he was right, but how did he know? He told me all those splats on my windshield were oil splashes, and if I didn't get my oil changed soon I'd run out. I laughed, thinking he was joking, and told him they were bug splats. He said "I've worked on cars longer than you...I know what I'm talking about".
So I had to test that logic. I excitedly exclaimed "babe, I saw a werewolf today!" He said "are you sure it wasn't a coyote?" I said "I've lived in AZ longer than you. I know what I'm talking about". He actually thought about it for a second, shrugged in agreement, and said "huh. That's freaking cool!".
#78
When he said he was going to shrink a $5 note using the iron and it started smoking and almost caught fire. Still marrying him though lol.
#79
He didn't believe in dinosaurs (and not for religious reasons).
We broke up and I'm now dating a scientist.
#80
When I was helping him review his personal job review and he kept using the term "in example". He would write something like "I budget my time well with my job. In example, I get to my meetings thirty minutes early."
I asked him why he was saying "in example" instead of "an example would be" or "for example" and he claimed that he was using "i.e." just not abbreviating. I.e. is the abbreviation for the latin phrase "id est" meaning "that is."
Apparently, he had been doing this all throughout high school, college, and his professional career.
#81
Same answer I gave there: at 27, he decided he wasn’t happy with his job and life path, so he decided to “go back to school,” which meant night classes at an acting school, which cost $14,000 and wiped out his savings. He still has the same job and nothing has changed other than my leaving him after he cheated on me with a woman in the acting program.
#82
When he told me all about the reptilian alien overlords and how they are running the world. And then he thought a movie that was 140 minutes was 1 hour and 40 minutes long. He didn't seem to understand that 1 hour = 60 minutes.
#83
When he told me he needed a break from working after he got laid off because he worked all his life and was tired of it. He is 26 now... at the time of this being told to me, he was 23.
#84
He'd start a sentence trying to make a point of something and end his sentence on a completely different note, and then not understand why I couldn't understand the point he was trying to make.
#86
Wasn't dating him, it was an Arrange Marriage prospect, was "getting to know him". Told him that washing dishes is the chore I hate the most. He said "Don't worry, my mom does the chores at home, after marriage you don't have to worry about it." Me and my friend could not stop laughing. Started using that line on all AM prospects after that.
#87
When she said with all seriousness That she can't talk over call for long coz they'll(govt) be listening to our conversations.
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