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Man’s Effort To Keep Late Wife’s Memory Alive For Their Daughter Ends In Betrayal By His New Wife
Man’s Effort To Keep Late Wife’s Memory Alive For Their Daughter Ends In Betrayal By His New Wife
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Man’s Effort To Keep Late Wife’s Memory Alive For Their Daughter Ends In Betrayal By His New Wife

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Getting back into dating after a long-term relationship or even a marriage is by no means easy. There will be engagements, baggage and often some degree of comparisons here and there. If there are kids from a previous relationship, then everything gets a lot more complicated.

A man asked the internet what to do after his wife threw away the last recordings of his late ex-wife before he could give them to their daughter. We reached out to the man who shared the story via private message and will update the article when they get back to us.

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    Being someone’s second spouse comes with some complications

    Man in distress sitting, planning surprise for daughter with tapes of her late mother, looking troubled.

    Image credits: LightFieldStudios / Envato Elements (not the actual photo)

    A man had to rethink the future of his relationship after his wife threw out the only tapes of his late ex-wife and the mother of his daughter

    Text about a man wanting to surprise his daughter with tapes of her late mother, mentioning his new wife's actions.

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    Text story about a man and his late wife, pregnancy news after their wedding.

    Text describing making tapes during pregnancy for daughter's surprise with late mother's videos.

    Text expressing a promise to show tapes of her late mother to daughter Eleanore on her 18th birthday.

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    Text about a mother's tragic passing in an accident, part of a story on a father's surprise plans for his daughter.

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    Man in car holding bottle, head on steering wheel, wearing plaid shirt, rainy window visible.

    Image credits: jcomp / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Man reflects on grief after wife's passing, raising daughter alone, and struggles with dating again.

    Text story about family and relationships, discussing his daughter, meeting his new wife, and blending their families.

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    Text about a father planning to surprise daughter with tapes of her late mother.

    Text describing a conversation about tapes of late mother, with mention of an uncomfortable expression.

    A woman in a white shirt looking thoughtful, holding a tissue, with natural light highlighting her expression.

    Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Text discussing the father's memories of his late wife for his daughter, causing discomfort to his new wife.

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    Text discussing Wendy's feelings about Cloe and her sadness, relevant to the daughter's late mother.

    Text about Chloe's modeling career and appearance compared to Wendy, with a focus on beauty and personal circumstances.

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    Text expressing concerns about jealousy in relationships, related to man planning surprise with tapes of daughter's late mother.

    Text about love and emotions in a planned surprise for a daughter involving tapes of her late mother.

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    Text about a man comforting his daughter with a hug and forehead kiss, discussing feelings after an incident apology.

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    Cassette tapes on a table, symbolizing a father's plan to surprise his daughter with recordings of her late mother.

    Image credits: Wdnld / Envato Elements (not the actual photo)

    Text describing a father showing tapes of his late wife to his new wife as part of a planned surprise for his daughter.

    Text about a father planning to surprise his daughter with tapes of her late mother, but facing complications.

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    Text describing a man searching, finds his wife watching TV, related to surprising daughter with tapes.

    Text about a man discovering his new wife threw away tapes of his late wife, impacting his plans for his daughter.

    Text describing a father's anger as a surprise for his daughter involving her late mother is ruined.

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    Text about a heated argument and emotional reaction involving tapes of a late mother.

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    Man in a blue shirt looks pensive while sitting on a couch, woman gestures animatedly beside him.

    Image credits: Prostock-studio / Envato Elements (not the actual photo)

    Man plans to give daughter tapes of her late mother to bring them closer.

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    Text describing man's conflict with his wife over surprise tapes for daughter.

    Text about mutual friends urging forgiveness over a 10-year-old loss, relevant to the surprise tapes topic.

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    Text message expressing confusion and need for help regarding missing files, related to surprising daughter with tapes.

    Image credits: Much_Bed_2383

    Image credits: Wdnld / Envato Elements (not the actual photo)

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    Before smartphones, it wasn’t necessarily common to preserve recordings of someone

    People keep memorabilia of deceased family members, like photos, VHS tapes, old letters, or even a well-worn sweater, because they serve as tangible connections to someone who is not around anymore. These objects hold more than just memories, they might be the last recordings of someone’s voice, their mannerisms or even how they look. In the digital age, we often take for granted the fact that in the past, photos weren’t that common and even having a recording of someone’s voice was rare.

    A faded photograph can instantly transport someone back to childhood, a home video can bring back the sound of a lost voice, and a handwritten note can feel like a final conversation frozen in time. In a world that moves on quickly, these keepsakes act as anchors to the past, reminders that love and legacy don’t disappear just because someone is gone.

    This can be even more important for a child who never got to meet this parent, like in this story. When the new wife threw away the tapes (more on that later) she was also depriving this teenage girl from ever seeing and hearing her mother. So when the husband is considering how to approach his current wife, he also has to think about what his daughter will feel when she finds out about the whole situation.

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    Image credits: prostock-studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Managing a second spouse can be a minefield

    To play the devil’s advocate, being someone’s second spouse isn’t easy. No matter how happy the relationship is, there’s often a shadow of the first marriage lingering in the background, real or imagined. Maybe it ended badly, leaving behind emotional scars. Maybe it ended in loss, and you’re unintentionally competing with a memory. Either way, you’re not starting fresh, you’re stepping into someone else’s story.

    There are practical challenges, too. If there are kids from the first marriage, one must navigate family dynamics that existed before the current marriage. There might be lingering friendships, in-laws with opinions, or even an ex. Emotional baggage, real or imagined can and will affect how someone approaches a relationship. And then there’s the comparison factor, “They used to vacation here, they used to celebrate anniversaries this way…” Even if no one says it out loud, it’s hard not to wonder if you measure up.

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    This man does state that he doesn’t compare, which we have to take at face value. Later, in the update, he reveals how the wife lied to him, so it’s clear that she has not been honest in this story. For those who might have been distraught by this situation, spoiler alert, there is a semi-positive update, which he shared later. You can find it below, beyond the comments on his initial post.

    A few people needed more info and some gave suggestions

    Online comments about a plan to retrieve tapes of a late mother before trash collection.

    Text conversation about a man surprising daughter with tapes of late mother, with reactions from online community.

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    Reddit comment discussing a man's new wife's actions regarding tapes of his late wife.

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    Most took his side

    Reddit comment criticizing a man's new wife for discarding tapes meant for his daughter.

    Reddit comment about parenting, discussing a man planning to surprise daughter with tapes of late mother; strong opinions shared.

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    Reddit comment criticizing a man's new wife's reaction to tapes of his late wife for his daughter.

    Comment by user jacobharris40 on Reddit post about surprise tapes of late mother.

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    Reddit comment discussing a man’s plan to surprise his daughter with tapes of her late mother, questioning new wife's actions.

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    Comment discussing relationship issues and irreparable actions, mentioning "dumpster diving.

    Text response discussing a woman's actions impacting plans to surprise a daughter with tapes of her late mother.

    Comment urging secrecy in surprise tape plan for daughter.

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    Reddit comment discussing surprise plan for daughter with late mother's tapes, involves current wife's objection.

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    Reddit comment discussing a father's plan to share tapes of a late mother with his daughter, and conflict with a new wife.

    Later, he shared an update

    Hand holding vintage tapes, central to plans involving late mother’s memories.

    Image credits: Wdnld / Envato Elements (not the actual photo)

    Text discussing hidden tapes related to surprise plan for daughter involving late mother.

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    Text screenshot about a man looking for missing tapes he planned to give his daughter.

    Text about a man confronting someone using divorce as leverage, related to surprise plans for daughter and new wife's reaction.

    Text recounting the daughter receiving her late mother's tapes, initially hidden by the new wife.

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    Text from image discussing surprise tapes of daughter’s late mother, unsure if Eleanore knew about them.

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    Text on image about birthday surprise involving tapes from late mother.

    Man contemplating at table, wearing a ring, with blurred woman in the background, related to surprising daughter with tapes.

    Image credits: New Africa / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Text about considering divorce and maintaining a 6-year relationship amidst recent events.

    Text discussing need for help and therapy consideration in a relationship with plans to surprise daughter with tapes.

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    Text about Wendy bonding with stepdaughter, mentioning family dynamics and emotional roles.

    Text conversation about daughter, respect, and family issues with a conflicted father.

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    Image credits: Much_Bed_2383

    Readers shared their advice

    Text about a man retrieving tapes of his late wife, despite his new wife's objections.

    Text discussing a man's dilemma over tapes of his late wife and his new wife's actions.

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    Comment suggesting tapes be digitized and backed up; hints at differing ideas from man's new wife regarding late mother's tapes.

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    Comment on man’s plan to share tapes of late mother, facing resistance from new wife.

    Reddit comment discussing preserving tapes for a daughter, emphasizing protection from a wife.

    Text conversation about finding tapes, discussing relationship advice and personal reflection.

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    Text discussing the impact of a new wife's actions on a man's surprise for his daughter involving tapes of her late mother.

    Reddit comment discussing man's plan to surprise daughter with tapes of her late mother and his new wife's interference.

    Text from online forum discussing a man's plan to surprise his daughter with tapes from her late mother.

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    Text discussing a father's plan to surprise his daughter with tapes of her late mother, and conflicts with his new wife.

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    Reddit comment discussing daughter's late mother's tapes; frustration at new wife's actions.

    Text about a man planning to surprise his daughter with tapes of her late mother, revealing family tensions.

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    Justin Sandberg

    Justin Sandberg

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

    Read less »
    Justin Sandberg

    Justin Sandberg

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

    What do you think ?
    PeakyBlinder
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For me this would be unforgiveable, no chance to continue this relationship. And she is not even sorry or realizes she did something wrong - she apologizes and at the same time hieß the tapes to throw them away anyhow. This woman is a psycho, get rid of her!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Absolutely. That was planned and malicious.

    Load More Replies...
    Charles McChristy
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So on top of everyting else, she still had the tapes in her trunk the entire time she was "apologizing"? This woman is psychotic. It takes a real narscisssit/sociopath to do something like this. This can't be the first time she's acted in a similar way.

    Jumping Jellyfishes
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This. She wasn't really apologizing. She was willing to die on that hill.

    Load More Replies...
    Hidalgo
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Couple things. First provide for your daughter now and write a will leaving her at least half of everything. If you die intestate all would go to your wife and daughter get nothing. Second talk to a lawyer-not for divorce necessarily (that’s an option though), but asset protection for your daughter. Remember that she has nothing unless you provide it.

    Regina Holt
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think he should leave everything to his daughter, not just half. His wife does not deserve a thing after this.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    PeakyBlinder
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For me this would be unforgiveable, no chance to continue this relationship. And she is not even sorry or realizes she did something wrong - she apologizes and at the same time hieß the tapes to throw them away anyhow. This woman is a psycho, get rid of her!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Absolutely. That was planned and malicious.

    Load More Replies...
    Charles McChristy
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So on top of everyting else, she still had the tapes in her trunk the entire time she was "apologizing"? This woman is psychotic. It takes a real narscisssit/sociopath to do something like this. This can't be the first time she's acted in a similar way.

    Jumping Jellyfishes
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This. She wasn't really apologizing. She was willing to die on that hill.

    Load More Replies...
    Hidalgo
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Couple things. First provide for your daughter now and write a will leaving her at least half of everything. If you die intestate all would go to your wife and daughter get nothing. Second talk to a lawyer-not for divorce necessarily (that’s an option though), but asset protection for your daughter. Remember that she has nothing unless you provide it.

    Regina Holt
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think he should leave everything to his daughter, not just half. His wife does not deserve a thing after this.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
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