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Guy Throws A Fit After GF Refuses To Give Him Kids: “Doesn’t Think Marriage Is Important”
Man angrily confronting woman about having kids and no interest in getting married during intense conversation.
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Guy Throws A Fit After GF Refuses To Give Him Kids: “Doesn’t Think Marriage Is Important”

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Back in the day, there were pretty strict expectations about the path each couple’s relationship would take. After dating for a while, it was time to get married. And after tying the knot, the next steps were to buy a house and start a family. Nowadays, however, we understand that not everyone wants a traditional, cookie-cutter lifestyle. There are a million different ways to be a happy couple or loving family.

But issues can arise when you and your partner just can’t manage to get on the same page. One woman recently reached out to Reddit detailing why she’s refusing to have kids with her boyfriend. Below, you’ll find all of the details, as well as some of the replies readers left her. 

RELATED:

    It’s important for couples to be on the same page before deciding to start a family

    Young woman and her boyfriend having serious talk outdoors during sunset, discussing relationship and future plans.

    Image credits:  Matheus Câmara da Silva / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    So when this woman’s boyfriend said he had no interest in marriage, she made it clear that they wouldn’t be having any children either

    Text excerpt discussing a woman open to having kids until her boyfriend reveals no interest in marriage after seven years.

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    Text about a woman open to having kids and her boyfriend’s feelings about marriage and starting a family.

    Close-up of woman holding baby feet, symbolizing openness to having kids and relationship challenges about marriage.

    Image credits: Alex Pasarelu / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

    Text excerpt about a woman discussing having kids and marriage commitment with her boyfriend.

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    Text excerpt showing a boyfriend expressing no interest in getting married and doubts about the importance of marriage.

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    Couple having an intense argument indoors, highlighting a woman open to having kids facing relationship conflict.

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    Woman open to having kids but faces boyfriend's no interest in marriage and relationship stability concerns.

    Text discussing a woman open to having kids until her boyfriend reveals no interest in getting married and his health limits.

    Image credits: Patient_Art4006

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    A quarter of all parents in the United States are unmarried

    It seems like every single year, living a “traditional” lifestyle becomes less and less common. The more freedom people have to make their own choices, the more they experiment and realize that they don’t actually fit into any cookie-cutter molds. And while it hasn’t been unheard of to have children without being married for many years, it has become much less taboo over the past few decades.

    According to the Pew Research Center, by 2018, a quarter of all parents in the United States were unmarried. This is four times more unmarried parents than there were in 1968. And today, one fifth of all American kids live with just their mother. At the same time, the number of unmarried dads has more than doubled since 1968. And about half of all single parents have never been married at all.

    Meanwhile, marriage rates in the United States have been declining for the past 30 years. In fact, it’s now more common for adults between the ages of 18 to 44 to have lived with a partner than to have been married, the Pew Research Center reports. But the majority of both people cohabitating with a partner and those who are married have at least one child at home.

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    So how can a couple decide that it’s time to get married or have children? It’s understandable to be wary of marriage, especially considering the fact that about 41% of first marriages end in divorce. Plus, plenty of people have kids out of wedlock. As long as the kids have two parents who love them, it doesn’t matter if they’re wearing rings, right?

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    There are pros and cons to getting married, but one of the main reasons why couples choose to tie the knot is to have legal protections. The author of this post noted that her boyfriend was concerned about how men are often treated during divorces, but he didn’t seem worried about the fact that he would have no legal protection during a breakup.

    Woman holding baby looking concerned beside stressed boyfriend on couch, reflecting conflicting feelings about having kids and marriage

    Image credits: Curated Lifestyle / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    Deciding whether or not to have kids is a personal choice that should not be taken lightly

    If the couple were to be married and then later divorce, a judge would decide how to split their assets and custody fairly. If the pair was only breaking up, however, the situation could become extremely messy very quickly. 

    Statistically, Millennials who say “I do” before having kids are also more likely to prosper financially, For Your Marriage notes. But, of course, deciding whether or not to get married or have children are not choices that should ever be taken lightly.

    Motherhood clarity therapist Ann Davidman shared some advice with Elle for couples who are still on the fence about starting a family. She notes that there is no right or wrong decision, it truly depends on what you want. 

    And even if you think you know how you feel about having kids, explore that. Try babysitting your nieces and nephews, or fully embrace your childfree lifestyle to understand what you’d be missing out on if you had a baby. Make an informed decision.

    Davidman also says that your fears are irrelevant when it comes to making this choice. If you’re scared of having a difficult pregnancy or of having nobody to help care for you when you’re elderly, those fears shouldn’t inform your decision. They’re hypothetical situations that may not even become true, so focus on what really matters.

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    Finally, the expert says that deciding to become a parent is a personal choice. Don’t let anyone pressure you to sway one way or the other. 

    We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this woman made the right choice by putting her foot down and sticking to her values? Feel free to weigh in. Then, you can find another Bored Panda article discussing similar issues right here

    Readers assured the woman that she was right to stand by her values, and many warned her that it might be time to end the relationship

    Reddit comments discussing a woman open to having kids until her boyfriend reveals no interest in marriage.

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    Comment discussing divorce, single women, and birth control in response to relationship concerns about having kids.

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    Comment from ERVetSurgeon advising a woman about having kids and relationship boundaries with her boyfriend.

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    Screenshot of a forum comment discussing a boyfriend's lack of interest in getting married despite a woman's openness to having kids.

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    Reddit user discussing a woman open to having kids but her boyfriend shows no interest in getting married after 7 years.

    Comment on a post about a woman open to having kids who faces conflict after her boyfriend says he won't marry.

    Forum user cactuswildcat explains why a woman is reconsidering her relationship after boyfriend rejects marriage and kids.

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    Online comment debating a woman open to having kids despite boyfriend’s lack of interest in marriage.

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    Text excerpt about relationship issues showing disrespect and boundaries in a serious discussion about having kids.

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

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    Adelaide May Ross

    Adelaide May Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    What do you think ?
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand how couples can avoid talking about marriage, kids and finances for seven years after an early discussion. How does it not come up? My partner and I both don't want children, made it clear early on, but ten years in, I would say that topic comes up every few months, not with what do you think but in conversations that make our attitudes clear. I am ambivalent about marriage, he does not want to marry, but the topic comes up,, what would you do in so-and-so's place etc. So we've got a plan to marry if we need to for legal/practical reasons. Do they really talk about weddings and families and other people's kids and meticulously avoid giving away an opinion or a desire? Or were they just hoping to softly manipulate the other over to their point of view over time without giving away the game? Either way, their communication is this bad after seven years, they should break up.

    Shannon Donnelly
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Totally agree with you! They discussed all of this early on in the relationship, she made it clear what her values and expectations were, and then…? For seven YEARS??? What are y’all talking about??

    Load More Replies...
    Michael MacKinnon
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In general, outside of maybe a handful of countries, the lack of financial and legal protection for children born outside of a marriage is far, far worse than any financial or legal risk to men from a divorce.

    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's trying to guilt-trip her into having kids cuz he's sick. Walk away, OP!

    Load More Comments
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand how couples can avoid talking about marriage, kids and finances for seven years after an early discussion. How does it not come up? My partner and I both don't want children, made it clear early on, but ten years in, I would say that topic comes up every few months, not with what do you think but in conversations that make our attitudes clear. I am ambivalent about marriage, he does not want to marry, but the topic comes up,, what would you do in so-and-so's place etc. So we've got a plan to marry if we need to for legal/practical reasons. Do they really talk about weddings and families and other people's kids and meticulously avoid giving away an opinion or a desire? Or were they just hoping to softly manipulate the other over to their point of view over time without giving away the game? Either way, their communication is this bad after seven years, they should break up.

    Shannon Donnelly
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Totally agree with you! They discussed all of this early on in the relationship, she made it clear what her values and expectations were, and then…? For seven YEARS??? What are y’all talking about??

    Load More Replies...
    Michael MacKinnon
    Community Member
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In general, outside of maybe a handful of countries, the lack of financial and legal protection for children born outside of a marriage is far, far worse than any financial or legal risk to men from a divorce.

    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's trying to guilt-trip her into having kids cuz he's sick. Walk away, OP!

    Load More Comments
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