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Guy Wants A Breather From 14-Year Relationship, Demands Ex Not Sleep Around, She Ignores Him

Guy Wants A Breather From 14-Year Relationship, Demands Ex Not Sleep Around, She Ignores Him

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Breakups can be hard but, in some instances, they’re a way to break free from a relationship that’s no good for you. This is especially true if your partner is manipulative, abusive, or always tries to control you. If that’s the case, you need to get out.

One woman was in a 14-year relationship with her high school sweetheart when he decided to split up with her. In the aftermath, he drunkenly assaulted her, so she slept with someone else to put a decisive end to things. She’s since turned to Reddit to ask if that was a jerk move. 

More info: Reddit

14 years is a long time to be in a relationship, but this woman found a decisive way to end hers

Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Her boyfriend split up with her, claiming he wanted to take a 6-month break and told her not to sleep with anyone else or she would be “tainted”

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Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

In the aftermath, he drunkenly assaulted her, so she immediately slept with someone else, ensuring her abusive boyfriend wouldn’t want to take her back

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Image credits: Pixabay / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The now ex-boyfriend accused her of “ruining everything” and told her that he even had plans to propose, but the woman was unmoved

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Image credits: Confident_Kangaroo95

She said she didn’t think he was worth any more of her time, but still turned to netizens to ask if hooking up with someone else to end things was a jerk move

OP begins her post by telling the community that she and her high school sweetheart were together for 14 years before he split up with her the day before her birthday because he felt their relationship had grown stagnant. After talking it over, they decided to instead take a 6-month break before considering the possibility of patching things up.

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She says he told her he realized what a terrible boyfriend he had been, and he wanted the time and space to become someone she deserved. That was in June, and OP gave him until July to find a place and move out. Then, one drunken night, things took a turn for the worse when he assaulted her, forcing her to stay with her family while he moved out.

OP told him that they’d have to split all their stuff by text and email from then on, but he said he didn’t remember being violent and still wanted the chance to prove to her that he was the best man he could be for her. He then went on to tell OP that she couldn’t be with anyone during their break because that would be a surefire way to make him not want to take her back.

Well, OP immediately slept with someone else. Now her ex is telling her that she’s “ruined everything” and revealed that he had plans to marry her. OP says she doesn’t think he deserves another minute of her time but asked Redditors whether or not what she did was a jerk move.

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Image credits: Valeriia Miller / Pexels (not the actual photo)

If you’ve ever been through a messy breakup, you’ll know just how complicated things can get. Now imagine the baggage that comes with a 14-year relationship, especially when you share things like bank accounts and power of attorney. 

From OP’s post, it seems she had to get out, and her ex gave her the golden ticket. By sleeping with someone else, she let him know that there wasn’t a hope of reconciliation.

The world is full of breakup horror stories, some funny, most awkward. In her article for Thought Catalog, January Nelson shares several hilarious breakup stories that might make you feel better about your imperfect love life.

A few of the best include someone who got dumped for eating pizza with a knife and fork, another person who was unceremoniously rejected for telling her partner she didn’t like Star Wars, and one unfortunate individual who was sent packing for making a girl smile too much – apparently, she had braces that aggravated the inside of her mouth.

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In her article for Refinery29, Sara Coughlin lists breakup stories that are guaranteed to make you cringe, while this article from Bored Panda reveals 40 moments that ruined relationships – don’t miss the expert interview with Dr. Cortney S. Warren.

While some might consider OP’s actions extreme, you can’t really blame her for taking the nearest exit from her abusive relationship. 

What would you have done if you were in her shoes? Do you think her partner got what he deserved? Let us know your opinion in the comments!

In the comments, readers slammed the woman’s ex for his double standards and swiftly concluded she was not the jerk

Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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Ivan Ayliffe

Ivan Ayliffe

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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After twenty years in advertising, I've decided to try my hand at journalism. I'm lucky enough to be based in Cape Town, South Africa and use every opportunity I get to explore everything it has to offer, both indoors and out. When I'm not reading, writing, or listening to podcasts, I spend my time swimming in the ocean, running mountain trails, and skydiving. While I haven't travelled as much as I'd like, I did live in !ndia, which was an incredible experience. I love live music, whether it's in a massive stadium or an intimate club setting.

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Ivan Ayliffe

Ivan Ayliffe

Writer, BoredPanda staff

After twenty years in advertising, I've decided to try my hand at journalism. I'm lucky enough to be based in Cape Town, South Africa and use every opportunity I get to explore everything it has to offer, both indoors and out. When I'm not reading, writing, or listening to podcasts, I spend my time swimming in the ocean, running mountain trails, and skydiving. While I haven't travelled as much as I'd like, I did live in !ndia, which was an incredible experience. I love live music, whether it's in a massive stadium or an intimate club setting.

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Hi! Nice to meet you~ I'm very passionate about animals, especially cats, photography, small DIY projects, music and so much more! Could say I am the TV show The Office connoisseur since I have seen it at least a dozen times~

Read less »

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Rūta Zumbrickaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Hi! Nice to meet you~ I'm very passionate about animals, especially cats, photography, small DIY projects, music and so much more! Could say I am the TV show The Office connoisseur since I have seen it at least a dozen times~

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On a side note, marriage is not a "religious institution". All societies that we know of - past and present - have both religion and marriage. The two are not always really intertwined. Organized and especially monotheistic religions get their paws into everything. Religion did not create marriage. Religion took it over in many times and places (and corrupted it in many times and places).

tw 72
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In addition to all the reasons noted above - dump him. If you get back together and he knows you slept with someone else, you will never hear the end of it. Every fight, every disagreement, every time he does not get his own way - you'll hear how he did you a favor by marrying a "tainted" woman.

Ace
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

🎵You had a little time and you had a little fun/ Didn't you, didn't you?/ While you had yours do you think I had none?/ Do you, do you?/ // The freedom that you wanted bad/ Is yours for good/ I hope you're glad/ Sad into unsad

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Marnie
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On a side note, marriage is not a "religious institution". All societies that we know of - past and present - have both religion and marriage. The two are not always really intertwined. Organized and especially monotheistic religions get their paws into everything. Religion did not create marriage. Religion took it over in many times and places (and corrupted it in many times and places).

tw 72
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In addition to all the reasons noted above - dump him. If you get back together and he knows you slept with someone else, you will never hear the end of it. Every fight, every disagreement, every time he does not get his own way - you'll hear how he did you a favor by marrying a "tainted" woman.

Ace
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

🎵You had a little time and you had a little fun/ Didn't you, didn't you?/ While you had yours do you think I had none?/ Do you, do you?/ // The freedom that you wanted bad/ Is yours for good/ I hope you're glad/ Sad into unsad

Load More Comments
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