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Mom Sets Up Fundraiser For Daughter’s Trip To Africa, Gets Agitated Over Lack Of Donations
Mom Sets Up Fundraiser For Daughter’s Trip To Africa, Gets Agitated Over Lack Of Donations
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Mom Sets Up Fundraiser For Daughter’s Trip To Africa, Gets Agitated Over Lack Of Donations

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We want to get along with our colleagues. After all, few things drain you as much as unnecessary drama.

However, a person who goes by Ved on the forum Mumsnet fears they have no choice but to confront one of their co-workers. The issue? Relentless begging for donations to a fundraiser.

A woman that Ved works with wants to send her daughter on a trip to Africa, but since it costs a lot of money, the mom is asking others to contribute. And as the deadline approaches, she’s getting increasingly pushy.

RELATED:

    Parents want the best for their kids, but their enthusiasm can sometimes come across as pushy or excessive

    Woman reading on a tablet, seated on a couch with themed pillows, contemplating her daughter's exotic trip.

    Image credits: allatsyganova (not the actual photo)

    Especially when they want others to contribute to their child’s success

    Text about a woman seeking money for her daughter's exotic trip to Namibia, organized by her school.

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    Text about a woman persistently asking for money for her daughters' exotic trip fund.

    Text expressing frustration about contributing to a fund for a daughter's expensive trip.

    Woman seeking donations for daughter's exotic trip; poster in local post office and Spar, urging contributions.

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    Woman taking a selfie in sunglasses and casual attire outdoors, related to daughters' exotic trip.

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    Image credits: vadymvdrobot (not the actual photo)

    Text discussing contributions for woman's daughter's exotic trip.

    Text criticizing a woman's selective gratitude on Facebook for donations towards her daughters' exotic trip.

    Text snippet about a woman asked to fund a daughter's exotic trip despite the family's middle-class status.

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    Text screenshot discussing woman's dilemma over refusing money for daughter's trip.

    Image credits: Ved

    Rejection is part of raising funds

    Image credits:maitree rimthong (not the actual photo)

    It sounds like the woman might think her cause is compelling enough to warrant repeated requests for donations, even at the risk of annoying other people.

    But Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners, who was awarded the United States National Humanities Medal for her contributions to society as America’s foremost etiquette columnist and author, does not believe that a noble goal excuses rude behavior.

    “It is indeed a common fundraising technique to work the embarrassment that people might feel when refusing friends and colleagues, among whom they live and work (and who are likely familiar with their financial capabilities),” she writes.

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    “Even generous philanthropists do not enjoy social pressure. And at what cost, financially? Those who contribute only as a favor to you, rather than from genuine interest, might then reasonably expect you to contribute equally to their favorite charities.”

    She is not alone.

    Neon One is a company that provides software solutions tailored for nonprofits to help them manage fundraising, donor relationships, events, and other administrative tasks.

    According to their experts, not every request results in a donation, and people trying to raise funds should understand that rejection is a natural part of the process, as well as an opportunity to learn.

    If someone declines to give, they say, you should respond graciously and thank them for considering your request, not continue bombarding them with messages, trying to change their mind.

    As the story went viral, its author provided more information in the comments

    Text discussing a woman trying to fund her daughters' exotic trip through eBay selling, raising £150 so far.

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    People who have read the story believe the mom is out of line

    Text from a comment saying, "I won't be giving anything, please stop asking me," related to a woman's story about money for an exotic trip.

    Text exchange discussing refusal to pay for a daughter's exotic trip.

    Text screenshot discussing a response to a woman asking for money for her daughter's exotic trip, emphasizing financial limits.

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    Text discussing how to handle requests for money for a daughter's exotic trip through small contributions or alternative funding.

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    Text response highlighting blunt advice about persistence in a situation involving begging for money.

    Text conversation about a woman asking to fund her daughter's exotic trip, mentioning budget concerns and charity donations.

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    Text response declining donation for woman's daughter's exotic trip, expressing prior allocation of charitable funds.

    Text exchange about refusing to donate, prioritizing charity over funding exotic trips for a daughter.

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    A comment discouraging contributions to a woman's request for money for her daughter's exotic trip.

    Text discussing budgeting priorities over funding an exotic trip for daughter.

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    Commentary on funding for daughters' exotic trips, questioning the impact of such trips on local communities.

    Comment discussing a woman's pushy behavior regarding money for her daughter's exotic trip.

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    Text conversation about woman begging money for daughter's exotic trip.

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    Comment referencing "Grange Hill" cast, advising to decline with "just say no," related to a woman's money request for daughters' trip.

    Comment about refusing to donate money for an exotic trip, questioning the friendship's value.

    Commentary on a woman's request for money for her daughters' exotic trip, suggesting to give or block her.

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    Poll Question

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    Justinas Keturka

    Justinas Keturka

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

    Read less »
    Justinas Keturka

    Justinas Keturka

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

    Read more »

    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

    Read less »

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Rokas Laurinavičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

    Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

    What do you think ?
    Noflipstogive
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anywhere I've ever worked (from 16-60), there are definite rules about asking for any kind of donation. When I say rules, I mean NO asking for donations. This is why.

    Pencil McGovern
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not just donations, but selling things, too. Like kids selling candy bars to raise money for a team or whatnot. It's totally inappropriate in the workplace. And, like you said, this is why.

    Load More Replies...
    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    11 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh reminds me of my ex bosses who were millionaires and they begged regularly for funds for their severly disabled child, of whom they got regular large checks for from the government because he was born disabled (they knew at 4 months he would be severely disabled due to lack of oxygen and would need round the clock care 24/7). They guilted everyone to fork out money for every single event they held. People donated time, money, resources etc and not once did the family pay one thing. Special schools, hand outs; wheel chairs never used and custom made, hand outs; sent the child to America and they had a huge 3 week Disney vacation whilst the child was looked after in care, hand outs paid for the lot. Food, clothes, you name it, hand outs. They left the child in the elderly grandmother's care 90% of the time and she paid for everything instead of them. They gaslit her into it saying she should do it because her beloved grandchild needed it and if she loved him she would sacrifice it.

    Jill Peters
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know a couple like that. They spend more energy and time applying and begging for handouts for their marginally impaired child than they would just working regular jobs with health benefits. Ugh. Other people and I feel like they're exaggerating their child's imperceivable impairment in order to never work a day. I mean, even it it's as bad as they claim, ONE of them could work!

    Load More Replies...
    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, this woman needs to wear a sign that says "INSUFFERABLE". Don't give her a penny.

    Load More Comments
    Noflipstogive
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anywhere I've ever worked (from 16-60), there are definite rules about asking for any kind of donation. When I say rules, I mean NO asking for donations. This is why.

    Pencil McGovern
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not just donations, but selling things, too. Like kids selling candy bars to raise money for a team or whatnot. It's totally inappropriate in the workplace. And, like you said, this is why.

    Load More Replies...
    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    11 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh reminds me of my ex bosses who were millionaires and they begged regularly for funds for their severly disabled child, of whom they got regular large checks for from the government because he was born disabled (they knew at 4 months he would be severely disabled due to lack of oxygen and would need round the clock care 24/7). They guilted everyone to fork out money for every single event they held. People donated time, money, resources etc and not once did the family pay one thing. Special schools, hand outs; wheel chairs never used and custom made, hand outs; sent the child to America and they had a huge 3 week Disney vacation whilst the child was looked after in care, hand outs paid for the lot. Food, clothes, you name it, hand outs. They left the child in the elderly grandmother's care 90% of the time and she paid for everything instead of them. They gaslit her into it saying she should do it because her beloved grandchild needed it and if she loved him she would sacrifice it.

    Jill Peters
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know a couple like that. They spend more energy and time applying and begging for handouts for their marginally impaired child than they would just working regular jobs with health benefits. Ugh. Other people and I feel like they're exaggerating their child's imperceivable impairment in order to never work a day. I mean, even it it's as bad as they claim, ONE of them could work!

    Load More Replies...
    Beak Hookage
    Community Member
    11 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, this woman needs to wear a sign that says "INSUFFERABLE". Don't give her a penny.

    Load More Comments
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