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39YO Still In His “Douchey Teen Phase,” When BIL Points Out His Toxic Behavior, His Mom Loses It
If you go home for Christmas, you probably celebrate it with your family and relatives. And the thing about them, the bigger the family is, the more likely it is that there’s at least one person with whom you do not get along. Or at least don’t see eye to eye.
For today’s OP, that person was her brother. Well, saying that they are not seeing eye to eye is kind of an underestimation – their whole worldviews are probably on different sides of a spectrum. And so, only one remark of his started a whole trail of family drama.
More info: Reddit
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During Christmas many of us are forced to spend time with relatives, who don’t see eye to eye with us
Image credits: DC Studio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
For this story’s protagonist this relative was her brother, who recently came back from Japan
Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The main problem with this man was that he has fully adopted the so-called “red-pill” ideology
Image credits: kues1 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
His views slipped out during the Christmas dinner, when he dragged Americans for being “lazy”, when sister forgot to put knives on the desk
Image credits: Impressive-Pie9521
The woman tried talking about her brother’s disrespect with their mom, but she just doubled down on his stance
When the OP and her brother were about 10 years old, their family moved from the United Kingdom to the United States. While the author embraced her life here, it turned her brother into a red-pilled elitist.
He believes that white men are disadvantaged by diversity, that he can’t find a job because his female interviewers “don’t have the mind” for technical work, or that women shouldn’t be allowed to vote. Basically, a terrible situation.
His views were the thing that caused the main incident of this story. The OP had a Christmas party for her family. The woman spent hours preparing the meal, so the dinner could be as perfect as possible. Then, when setting the desk, she accidentally forgot to put down the knives. This made her brother comment, “Lazy Americans. Lazy Americans don’t use knives. Hahaha!”
This rubbed the original poster the wrong way. Knowing how much effort she put into this dinner, she couldn’t stand his rude jokes. So, she cursed at him, but everyone acted as if they didn’t hear her.
After the dinner, the OP went to talk to her mom about her brother, but she only doubled down on his comment. Yet, the main issue wasn’t even the comment itself (which was already problematic), but rather the brother’s disrespect towards his sister and her family.
But her mom didn’t want to hear it – she kept gaslighting her daughter that she’s simply overreacting. She even lashed out at her husband for not leaving the matter alone.
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
So, basically, the mom was enabling the toxic behavior of her son. And let’s not jump around the bush, red-pill ideology is beyond problematic, as this story’s example shows. The term for it comes from the movie The Matrix (1999). In it, the character is given a choice between two pills: red (choosing to learn a difficult truth about reality) and blue (remaining in a comfortable, blissful illusion).
It was a concept that started as a metaphor in an action movie, but with time, it turned into a politically charged one. Now, the so-called red-pillers are imagining they’re choosing to be awakened to the truth, which typically is the nonsense the brother from the story spat.
And it keeps getting worse. Now, in some circles in these incel communities, the discourse of “black-pill” keeps popping up. They think that the person’s looks are completely genetically determined, and since, in their eyes, women choose intimate partners only based on that, that means that whether or not a person will be an incel is predetermined.
They not only talk – they try to prove their truth with misreadings of scientific studies or even conducting their own “experiments”. Those who adopt this ideology can either just accept the reality that they’re an incel or try to change society, usually by advocating for mass violence and terror.
Well, as far as we know, the OP’s brother hasn’t gone this way – but if he keeps getting enabled, it’s rather possible that he might. As some netizens said – kicking the family out wouldn’t be the worst idea – after all, they just stomp over her boundaries of respect.
What do you think, was the woman over the line to call out her brother? Would you have done the same?
She started doubting if it was alright to call it out, but netizens assured her that it was
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What do you think ?
Anony Mouse 2 months ago
BP constantly posts (and reposts) “Durr America bad” stereotypes but lazy for not using knives? One of the weirdest ones I’ve ever heard.
Tabitha 2 months ago (edited)
I’m 65, and American. I have used knives to cut the meat and veg on my plate since I was a child—-of course the first knives I was given back then weren’t sharp. Just because OP forgot to grab the knives when she set the table doesn’t mean every American never ever uses knives at all, ffs. How do you even make that kind of leap, unless you’re really chomping at the bit to come up with an insult. Bro is nothing but a redpilled d****e. Just let him try saying that s**t to Americans, in a public place filled with Americans, and see just how far he gets before he gets punched. I would say OP’s best plan of action is to bar bro and mom from all family get togethers she’s hosting, until one or both convincingly apologize and prove they’ve learned their lesson about such behavior—-and even then they’ll be on probation and risk being permanently banned from all events, emails, gift lists, you name it. They will become unrelated strangers, and deservedly so. Leave them to have only each other, see how long it is before they’re miserable and tearing each other to shreds, also deservedly so.
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Fellfromthemoon 2 months ago
Mommy dear protected her chances of spending time with her son (Mr. Redpill was away for 7-8 years), and that is understandable. Not commendable, but I get it. Either she sees her son and listens to his bs, or loses contact. She made her choice. Do you remember the story about the prodigal son? The other child, who stayed and worked was taken granted.
Anony Mouse 2 months ago
BP constantly posts (and reposts) “Durr America bad” stereotypes but lazy for not using knives? One of the weirdest ones I’ve ever heard.
Tabitha 2 months ago (edited)
I’m 65, and American. I have used knives to cut the meat and veg on my plate since I was a child—-of course the first knives I was given back then weren’t sharp. Just because OP forgot to grab the knives when she set the table doesn’t mean every American never ever uses knives at all, ffs. How do you even make that kind of leap, unless you’re really chomping at the bit to come up with an insult. Bro is nothing but a redpilled d****e. Just let him try saying that s**t to Americans, in a public place filled with Americans, and see just how far he gets before he gets punched. I would say OP’s best plan of action is to bar bro and mom from all family get togethers she’s hosting, until one or both convincingly apologize and prove they’ve learned their lesson about such behavior—-and even then they’ll be on probation and risk being permanently banned from all events, emails, gift lists, you name it. They will become unrelated strangers, and deservedly so. Leave them to have only each other, see how long it is before they’re miserable and tearing each other to shreds, also deservedly so.
Load More Replies... Fellfromthemoon 2 months ago
Mommy dear protected her chances of spending time with her son (Mr. Redpill was away for 7-8 years), and that is understandable. Not commendable, but I get it. Either she sees her son and listens to his bs, or loses contact. She made her choice. Do you remember the story about the prodigal son? The other child, who stayed and worked was taken granted.
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