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Woman Plans To Leave Husband Of 10 Years As Their Toddler Starts Copying His Violent Behavior
It’s funny how impressionable toddlers can be, and I only realized this after my sister had her first baby. My niece is literally like a parrot that mimics everything that we say or do, so we all have to be super cautious around her.
Speaking of toddlers mimicking, this mom was absolutely mortified when her child started yelling and hitting her, just like her husband, who always screams his head off at her. However, what really triggered her was the kid saying she’s scared when “daddy shouts.” Read on to find out what really happened…
More info: Mumsnet
RELATED:
Some parents forget the fact that their toddlers copy almost everything they do, even the bad things
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The poster and her partner have been together for 10 years, and have 2 kids, but the man is emotionally violent towards her
Image credits: helloworld213
Image credits: Paul Jai / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Every time he loses his temper at her, he says something really hurtful, and then apologizes, but their toddler is copying him and yelling at the poster
Image credits: helloworld213
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The toddler also confessed that she’s scared when “daddy shouts,” and the heartbroken poster considered leaving, but he accused her of giving up on their family
Image credits: helloworld213
Image credits: Caleb Woods / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
She is sick of him cursing at her in front of their kids, and he also keeps calling her unstable since she has a few mental health issues
Image credits: helloworld213
Image credits: Alexander Grey / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
She has finally had enough, confessing everything to a friend, and is secretly planning to leave him, as he will make it hell for her if he finds out
Image credits: helloworld213
She has applied for emergency housing through her local council, and she’s acting normal so that he doesn’t get a hint about her plan
In today’s story, the original poster (OP) tells us how she’s sick of her partner of 10 years, with whom she has two kids. The thing is, he has a really short temper, and every little thing sets him off. In fact, once, he even pushed her, but there was never any physical violence after that. However, speaking of emotional cruelty, she literally faces it almost every day.
The worst part is that he shouts his head off, screams, and even curses at her right in front of their toddler, who is picking it up quickly. She has also started yelling and taking out her anger on her mom, just like dad does, and this just triggered the poster a lot. Moreover, the kid also admitted that she feels sad when her father gets angry and scared when he shouts.
Ugh, that’s truly horrifying coming from a little child, and it has shaken OP, who is contemplating leaving him for good. However, this man is so good at manipulating that he accused her of “not fighting for their family” and even claimed that she won’t be able to survive on her own. Besides, he has gotten worse in the past six months, and she has really had enough.
Previously, she was doubtful about it, since it’s not physical violence, but netizens assured her that emotional violence is just as harmful. OP also gave an update that she finally confessed everything to a friend and has decided that she is really going to leave him. In fact, she even mustered up the courage and applied for emergency housing through her local council.
The poster also mentioned that if her partner found out about it, he would give her hell. A lot of netizens suggested that she keep this a secret, and that’s exactly what she is doing. Now, she’s desperately waiting to hear from the council or get some advice from Women’s Aid.
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
While we know that emotional violence is awful, research says that it can have devastating effects on victims. It claims that they may feel anxious, afraid, confused, hopeless, and even question their self-worth, which makes it difficult for them to leave. No wonder the poster keeps doubting whether emotional cruelty really counts as violence and has stayed with him for so long.
Experts also warn that people who have been through it may develop neuroticism, chronic stress, attachment challenges, or emotional disconnect. This sounds super scary to me because she already has a few mental health issues. The man’s behavior is just worsening her psychological health. This just proves why she feels physically and mentally drained all the time.
It seems that the psychological condition of her daughter is equally bad, as she keeps enacting her father. Just when we think that’s awful, research warns that exposure to parental yelling can have serious implications for the child’s long-term well-being.
It further states that it can cause them to dissociate and get into fights, and it also shuts down their prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for cognitive functions. However, she can still save her and the other kid from further damage by leaving him, so I guess, the quicker it happens, the better for all of them.
A lot of people also pointed out that he truly sounds like a narcissist who only cares about himself, and I must say, I agree. Even the fact that there is always a “but” attached to all his apologies says a lot about him, doesn’t it? Do you agree with the verdict given by netizens? We would love to hear your thoughts about this story, so feel free to type away in the comments below!
Folks online assured her that emotional violence is just as bad as physical violence, and many advised her to ditch him as soon as possible
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What do you think ?
Livingwithcfs 1 month ago
I feel like I've just read my marriage story. I lived like that for 7 years and it broke me, the thing that I found the hardest to deal with was the feeling of failure, the failure to keep my marriage going and my kids safe. It's amazing just how much a person will put up with before they crack. I didn't leave until a workmate saw him with me and said if I go home he'd k**l me. I was willing to put up with so much until then. People say hurt leave him, just it's never that easy, she's very brave working on getting her and her kids out of there
Chris Jones 1 month ago
I hope you don't still feel like you failed. You did not. No-one can succeed when the person who is supposed to be their partner, their support, is actively working against them. It was not you, it was never you. Glad you are out now and I hope you are thriving.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 1 month ago
Search online for an organisation to help. If you can't find one, Planned Parenthood is really good about putting you in touch with resources. Make a plan, get out. Once you're out, file a restraining order with the police immediately, so he can't take the kids and use their safety against you. Every abu.sed person knows that things can always get worse, but as soon as you believe they can also get better, you're on your way to independence. It's a really hard road but focus on your kids and you'll get through it. But you have to commit to leaving, because going back or hesitating increases the danger significantly.
Nova Rook 1 month ago (edited)
I feel like your advice should be provided when these articles are shared. BP should provide some basic resource for people, it might help and causes no harm. Like when we watch a show about s e l f h a r m and at the end the show provides resources for people who are having issues.
Load More Replies...
ShadowKat 1 month ago
Your partner is a*****e and a gaslighter. YOU have been putting up with emotional manipulation for too long. Be strong. Ask for help! Using your MH against you is pathetic. Trust me, he will beg and cry, then bad-mouth you to everyone and become more unstable. Keep your children and yourself safe - physically and mentally. Starting again is scary, but waking up in misery and fear every day...??? I wish you all the very best.
Livingwithcfs 1 month ago
I feel like I've just read my marriage story. I lived like that for 7 years and it broke me, the thing that I found the hardest to deal with was the feeling of failure, the failure to keep my marriage going and my kids safe. It's amazing just how much a person will put up with before they crack. I didn't leave until a workmate saw him with me and said if I go home he'd k**l me. I was willing to put up with so much until then. People say hurt leave him, just it's never that easy, she's very brave working on getting her and her kids out of there
Chris Jones 1 month ago
I hope you don't still feel like you failed. You did not. No-one can succeed when the person who is supposed to be their partner, their support, is actively working against them. It was not you, it was never you. Glad you are out now and I hope you are thriving.
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 1 month ago
Search online for an organisation to help. If you can't find one, Planned Parenthood is really good about putting you in touch with resources. Make a plan, get out. Once you're out, file a restraining order with the police immediately, so he can't take the kids and use their safety against you. Every abu.sed person knows that things can always get worse, but as soon as you believe they can also get better, you're on your way to independence. It's a really hard road but focus on your kids and you'll get through it. But you have to commit to leaving, because going back or hesitating increases the danger significantly.
Nova Rook 1 month ago (edited)
I feel like your advice should be provided when these articles are shared. BP should provide some basic resource for people, it might help and causes no harm. Like when we watch a show about s e l f h a r m and at the end the show provides resources for people who are having issues.
Load More Replies... ShadowKat 1 month ago
Your partner is a*****e and a gaslighter. YOU have been putting up with emotional manipulation for too long. Be strong. Ask for help! Using your MH against you is pathetic. Trust me, he will beg and cry, then bad-mouth you to everyone and become more unstable. Keep your children and yourself safe - physically and mentally. Starting again is scary, but waking up in misery and fear every day...??? I wish you all the very best.
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